{"1": {"fulltext": "JlliiilihlilhliilJI!\\niii\\nBJ 1852\\n.K7\\nCopy 1\\nr,\\nPRAGTI gal\\nEtiquette\\n9", "height": "3287", "width": "2073", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0001.jp2"}, "2": {"fulltext": "LIBRARY OF CONGRESS.\\nBrn^^\\nChap. Copyright No,\\nShelf_,_i^4_.\\nUNITED STATES OF AMERICA.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0002.jp2"}, "3": {"fulltext": "", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0003.jp2"}, "4": {"fulltext": "", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0004.jp2"}, "5": {"fulltext": "", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0005.jp2"}, "6": {"fulltext": "", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0006.jp2"}, "7": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL\\nETIQUETTE\\nBy N. C.\\nTWENTIETH THOUSAND\\nEntirely Re-written and\\nEnlarged\\ny\\nCHICAGO\\nA. FLANAGAN.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0007.jp2"}, "8": {"fulltext": "TWO COPIES RECEIVED,\\nL ibrary of Cotiptftq|\\nOffice of th4\\niGl 5 1899\\nigister of Copyrights\\n50971\\nCopyright,\\n1899,\\nby a. Flanagan\\nSECOND COPY,", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0008.jp2"}, "9": {"fulltext": "PREFACE.\\nThe very extensive sale of Practical\\nEtiquette, a sale that has required the is-\\nsuance of a large number of editions of the\\nlittle manual, has been very gratifying to\\nits author, as was also the commission of its\\npublisher to re- write and enlarge the work.\\nThis commission, however, brought with it\\na keen sense of responsibility, for the author\\nfeels that a new work on etiquette can find\\na raison VHre only in a fairly successful\\nattempt at answering practically every ques-\\ntion that can arise concerning social rela-\\ntions, at least in ordinary social life. But\\nto speak with authority on all matters of\\ngood form is to speak dogmatically, and\\nso to speak is in itself not good form.\\nNevertheless, and in spite of this dilem-\\nma, the author has attempted herein to\\ndecide, when compelled to do so, between\\nconflicting opinions in mere matters of\\nsocial custom, and has given as authority\\nthe opinion that seemed to her to conform\\nmost nearly to common sense, embodying", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0009.jp2"}, "10": {"fulltext": "such opinion in an unqualified statement\\nwithout citing authority. Fortunately,\\nsocial customs are now so nearly uniform in\\nall parts of the country, that one familiar\\nwith the ways of good society in the West\\nor in the North, is at home in good society\\nin the East or in the South.\\nThe author is under obligation to so\\nmany persons for suggestions and advice,\\nas well as to many authors, that it does not\\nseem best to give a list of the same, especially\\nas such list could be only a partial one, for\\nmany of her friends would not desire men-\\ntion of their names.\\nN. C.\\nDec. i, iSpp.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0010.jp2"}, "11": {"fulltext": "CONTENTS.\\nCHAPTER I.\\nIntroductions 7\\nCai^s 9\\nCards 15\\nVisiting 20\\nCHAPTER II.\\nNotes of Invitation 21\\nAnnouncement Cards 26\\nWedding Invitations 30\\nAcceptances and Regrets 32\\nLetters^. 35\\nLetters oe Introduction 39\\nCHAPTER III.\\nDinners 41\\nLuncheons 44\\nBreakfasts 44\\nTeas 44\\nReceptions. 46\\nDancing Parties 46\\nCard Parties 47\\nWeddings 48\\nWedding Gifts 52\\nWedding Anniversaries 53\\nCHAPTER IV.\\nConversation 56\\nChaperonage 60\\nMarriage 62\\nDomestic Etiquette and Duties 64", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0011.jp2"}, "12": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER V.\\nDress 66\\nGloves 69\\nStreet Etiquette 70\\nTraveling 73\\nBicycling 75\\nTelephoning 76\\nCHAPTER VI.\\nThe Table and Service at Table 79\\nHabits at Table 86\\nServants and Serving 94\\nCHAPTER VII.\\nFunerals 98\\nMourning 100\\nCHAPTER VIII.\\nPoliteness oe Young Children 102\\nSchool-P-oom Etiquette 108\\nCHAPTER IX.\\nOfficial Etiquette Ill\\nCHAPTER X.\\nBusiness Correspondence 113\\nLetters oe Application, etc 116\\nCHAPTER XL\\nGeneral Hints 124", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0012.jp2"}, "13": {"fulltext": "INTRODUCTION.\\nTrue politeness is to do and say\\nThe kindest thing in the kindest way.\\nIf civil law is the outgrowth of regard for\\nother people s rights, social law is equally\\nthe outgrowth of regard for other people s\\nfeelings and convenience. Social law is\\nkindness and good- will and the desire to be\\nagreeable codified. A system of so much\\nimportance cannot be unworthy of con-\\nsideration.\\nThe very essence of good manners is self-\\npossession, and self-possession is another\\nname for self-forgetfulness. Gentility is\\nneither in birth, manner, nor fashion, but in\\nthe mind. A high sense of honor, a de-\\ntermination never to take a mean advantage\\nof another, and an adherence to truth,\\ndelicacy, and politeness towards those with\\nwhom one may have dealings, are the essen-\\ntial and distinguishing characteristics of a\\ngentleman.\\nQuietness in all things is an essential\\nelement to a well-bred person. He shuns\\nall outward display of his personality; he\\ncares not to to be seen or heard; he eschews\\nnoisy and grandiloquent talk; he avoids", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0013.jp2"}, "14": {"fulltext": "6 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nshowy and noticeable costumes. His voice\\nis low; his words simple; and his actions\\ngrave. He holds himself habitually under\\nrestraint; his words never seem to vibrate\\nwith emotion.\\nHabits are said to be good or bad as\\nthe result of actions that are right or wrong.\\nA man of good habits is one who has for so\\nlong a time practiced right thinking, speak-\\ning, and doing, that he acts properly from\\nforce of habit.\\nGood manners are not to be put on for\\nparticular occasions, like fine clothes, but\\nthey should be one s second nature. The\\nsimpler and more easy and unconstrained\\none s manners, the more he will impress\\npeople with his good breeding. Affectation\\nis one of the brazen marks of vulgarity.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0014.jp2"}, "15": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER I.\\nIntroductions, Cau,s, Cards, Visiting.\\nA beautiful behavior gives a higher pleas-\\nure than statues or pictures; it is the finest of\\nthe fine arts. Emerson.\\nINTRODUCTIONS.\\nIn introducing persons, one should be\\ncareful to pronounce each name distinctly.\\nWhen either name is not perfectly under-\\nstood, a repetition of it should be requested\\nof the person making the introduction.\\nWhen introductions are given, it is the man\\nwho should be presented to the woman;\\nwhen two women are introduced, it is the\\nyounger who is presented to the elder. For\\nexample, in presenting Mr. Jones to Mrs.\\nSmith, it is Mrs. Smith s name that is first\\nmentioned. The word introduce is pre-\\nferred to present. Informal introductions\\nare given by merely mentioning the names;\\nas, Mrs. Smith, Mr. Jones, and this is\\nordinarily sufficient.\\nIn introducing two sisters, the elder is\\nMiss Smith and the younger Miss Vir-\\nginia Smith.\\nWhen two women are introducd to each\\nother, it is not necessary for either to rise;\\na bow and a smile from each is sufficient.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0015.jp2"}, "16": {"fulltext": "8 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nA woman does not rise when a man is\\npresented to her, unless he is very old or is\\na person of great importance. Upon being\\nintroduced, a married woman may offer her\\nhand to a man but it is not customary for a\\nyoung woman to do so.\\nIt is the duty of a man who attends a\\nprivate entertainment, to have himself pre-\\nsented to every member of the family whom\\nhe does not know.\\nAn introduction in the street car is very\\nbad form.\\nOne should never forget that it is diffi-\\ncult, almost impossible, for some people to\\nremember names and faces, and that such\\npeople actually suffer from their inability to\\nrecognize and call by name persons to whom\\nthey may have been introduced recently.\\nIt is not uncommon to see one approach\\nsuch a person, offer her hand, and say, if\\nthere is not an immediate recognition, I am\\nafraid you do not remember me, while the\\nperson approached stands in agony, and\\ngradually makes an apology for her poor\\nmemory, and asks the name.\\nOne who is truly polite, who is at all\\nthoughtful for another person s feelings,\\nwould not be the cause of such a scene.\\nShe would prevent it by saying: I am\\nMrs. Smith. I had the pleasure of meet-\\ning you at Mrs. Brown s luncheon last\\nThursday; or something of the kind.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0016.jp2"}, "17": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 9\\nWhenever one has reason to think his\\nname or face may have been forgotten, he\\nshould make himself known, in approaching\\nanother person, by giving his name at least.\\nCALLS.\\nA first call ought to be returned within a\\nvery short time.\\nA lady when receiving rises as her callers\\nenter, and they immediately advance to pay\\ntheir respects to her before speaking to\\nothers.\\nA man takes any vacant chair, without\\ntroubling the hostess to look after him.\\nA man rises when women with whom he\\nis talking rise to take their leave. Women\\ncalling do not rise unless those who are\\nleaving are friends older than themselves.\\nWhen taking leave, one ought to choose\\na moment when there is a lull in the conver-\\nsation, and then take leave of the hostess,\\nletting one bow include the others in the\\nroom.\\nOne month after the birth of a child, a\\ncall of congratulation is made by acquain-\\ntances.\\nA call of condolence is made within ten\\ndays after the death, if the caller is on inti-\\nmate terms with the family, or within a\\nmonth if otherwise.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0017.jp2"}, "18": {"fulltext": "10 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nCalls of congratulation are due to the\\nnewly married, and to the parents who gave\\nthe invitations to the marriage.\\nA man invited by a woman to call upon\\nher, cannot, without great discourtesy, neg-\\nlect to pay the call within a week.\\nA lady will never keep a caller waiting,\\nwithout sending word that she will be in\\nimmediately.\\nOne ought always to return a call, but if\\nthe acquaintance is not desirable, the first\\ncall may be the last.\\nSome women only rise when their callers\\nleave, others accompany them as far as the\\ndrawing-room door; but it is always polite\\nfor a hostess to accompany her visitors to\\nthe front door when they take their leave,\\nif there is not a servant on hand to open the\\ndoor for them. The best bred hostesses\\neven go so far as to accompany their callers\\nto the elevator in a hotel or an apartment-\\nhouse. Of course, if one has more than one\\ncaller at a time, it would be discourteous to\\nleave the others to accompany one to the\\ndoor; but, otherwise, it is rude to permit\\na friend to go to the door alone, and get out\\nas best she may.\\nA bride who is At Home after Novem-\\nber first, should make a point of literally\\nstaying at home for an hour or two every\\nafternoon during the month of November", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0018.jp2"}, "19": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 11\\nand the early part of December. She should\\nbe dressed to receive callers, and should\\nhave some dainty refreshments ready to\\nserve, tea and sandwiches or cake. After\\nthe first week of December the bride may\\nbegin to return her calls, calling first on\\nthose who first called upon her, and so on.\\nWhen the at home is a large and formal\\nfunction, with engraved invitations and all\\nthe accessories of hired waiters, an elaborate\\nrepast, floral decorations, etc., such as a\\ndebutante s coming out, a wedding reception,\\nor a reception to celebrate a wedding anni-\\nversary, and other large entertainments of\\nthis order, an after-call is obligatory. But\\nan ordinary at home does not demand\\nanother call, for instance, the reception or\\ndays a bride has on her return from her\\nwedding trip, or when she is settled in her\\nnew home; or a tea or days for which a\\nhostess informally sends the invitations\\nwritten or engraved on her visiting cards,\\nand receives with little ceremony and serves\\nonly a modest menu. On the contrary, the\\nhostess owes a return call to all who attend;\\nand only those who were invited, but were\\nunable to be present, are in debt to her.\\nThe length of time proper for one to stay\\nat an at home depends on circumstances.\\nIt is always a compliment to one s hostess\\nto make a long visit at a day for it im-", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0019.jp2"}, "20": {"fulltext": "12 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nplies that one is having a pleasant time; but\\nnobody should stay long enough to be a\\nburden on the hostess s hospitality, or to\\ndetain her from her other guests. If one\\nfinds that she does not know any one present,\\nor if she is not introduced to a congenial\\nperson with whom she can have a pleasant\\nchat, it would be wise for her to leave after\\na conventional ten or fifteen minutes call.\\nThe calling code demands that soon after\\na second caller is announced, the caller who\\nwas first present shall take leave of the\\nhostess. The reason for this rule is obvious:\\nvisitor number one has already had a little\\ntime of uninterrupted tjste-a-t\u00c2\u00a3te with the\\nhostess before visitor number two appeared,\\nand he or she should generously retire first,\\nso that visitor number two may have the\\nsame privilege. But while this is the law,\\nit depends somewhat on circumstances\\nwhether it is always carried out. If the\\nfirst caller is an intimate friend of the\\nhostess, and has come to have a long in-\\nformal talk with her, and the second caller\\nis merely a formal visitor whose obvious\\nintention is to make a ceremonious visit,\\nthen the first comer may, with perfect pro-\\npriety, outstay the other; or if the hostess\\nhas particularly asked the former to remain\\nuntil after the latter goes, he may do so,\\nand, of course, if the first visitor has come\\nfor some special reason, and the visitor who", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0020.jp2"}, "21": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 13\\nis announced later interrupts an important\\nconversation, which, for business or other\\nreasons, should be continued, the former is\\nnaturally justified in transgressing the call-\\ning code. All things being equal, however,\\nit is the place of the first comer to be the\\nfirst goer; and one must have a very good\\nexcuse for outstaying a caller who comes\\nlater.\\nGuests who are invited to attend one large\\nreception which is given for the express pur-\\npose of introducing a young woman into\\nsociety, should make a call after the recep-\\ntion, but if the debutante is introduced at a\\nseries of days, the callers need call but\\nonce, on one of the days.\\nAn invitation to any kind of day or\\nreception demands a card from a person\\nwho is unable to attend the function; and\\nthe card should be sent on the day of the\\nreception, even if the invitation to the func-\\ntion has been already answered, and even if\\nan after-call is in order.\\nWhen one calls on an acquaintance who\\nis staying with a relative, the caller should\\nask for the latter (the hostess), even if she\\ndoes not know her, and she should leave\\none of her own and one of her husband s\\ncards for her, as well as one of each for her\\nfriend. It is not obligatory to leave two\\nof her husband s cards for each woman.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0021.jp2"}, "22": {"fulltext": "14 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nEven in the most formal visiting, it is op-\\ntional whether one leaves one or two cards.\\nProbably the hostess will excuse herself\\naltogether; but the caller must show her\\nthe courtesy of asking for her.\\nIn making a call it is proper to give one s\\ncard to the servant who opens the door, if\\nit is not a regular reception day; but on\\nsuch an occasion the card should be left\\neither in the dressing-room or on the hall\\ntable in passing out.\\nIn making a formal call ten minutes is\\nquite long enough to stay.\\nWhen one is returning visits and driving,\\nit would be in very bad taste to have the\\ncoachman get off his box and take the card\\nto the door. It is the woman s place to de-\\nliver her card in person, unless she has a\\nfootman to attend to it for her.\\nIn making an evening call a man should\\nappear about half-past eight, and remain an\\nhour. Even if his visit is to the daugh-\\nter, he should ask for her mother.\\nIt is quite proper, when making calls\\nwith a friend, for one to write her name in\\npencil on her friend s card, if she has no\\ncard of her own with her.\\nThose women whose households are most\\nmodest find that the day at home is a\\ngreat convenience, since, having a special", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0022.jp2"}, "23": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 15\\ntime for receiving one s friends, all neces-\\nsary arrangements can be made beforehand,\\nand no embarrassing situations are apt to\\noccur.\\nWhen one calls on a friend who lives in a\\nflat, she should, immediately after ringing,\\ncall through the tube her name and that of\\nthe person she wishes to see.\\nA man leaves his overcoat, hat, and stick\\nin the hall when making an evening call;\\nwhen calling in the afternoon he leaves his\\novercoat in the hall, but carries his hat and\\nstick into the drawing-room with him.\\nWhen a daughter is in the parlor, and\\nher mother is entertaining callers, she should\\nrise when her mother does in bidding them\\ngood-day.\\nIt is very improper for a young girl who\\nis ill to receive men callers in her room.\\nCARDS.\\nWhen an invitation to a reception is sent\\nin the name of several women, a guest\\nshould leave or send cards for all whose\\nnames are on the invitation. A woman\\nleaves with her own cards the cards of\\nthose members of her family who are un-\\nable to call.\\nA young woman, when calling upon her\\nfriends with a young man who is a stranger", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0023.jp2"}, "24": {"fulltext": "16 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nto them, should send his card with her own\\nto the hostess and other women of the\\nhousehold.\\nIn making formal calls a visitor invari-\\nably hands her cards to the servant who\\nopens the door with a card tray in her\\nhand; when calling informally one may sim-\\nply give her name to the servant at the\\ndoor, but then leaves no card later.\\nA married woman, when making formal\\ncalls, leaves one of her husband s and one\\nof her own cards for the hostess and for\\nevery other woman she asks for in the\\nhouse, and one of her husband s cards, be-\\nsides, for the host; but, while this is the\\nrule for formal visiting, it is quite permis-\\nsible for a married woman, when calling on\\na number of women who reside in the same\\nhouse, to leave, besides her own and her\\nhusband s for the host and hostess, only one\\nmore of each for all the others.\\nIn making formal visits, and subsequent\\ncalls after the first formal visit has been\\nmade, a married woman need leave only one\\nof her husband s cards with her own; and\\nin making a call in acknowledgment of an\\ninvitation to an entertainment to which she\\nalone was invited, such as a woman s lunch-\\neon, she should leave only one of her own.\\nThe fashionable visiting card varies in\\nsize; but for a married woman it is generally", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0024.jp2"}, "25": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 17\\npure white and very thin, with the name\\nengraved in ordinary script. For a woman\\nwho lives in the country, it is in good taste\\nto have the name of her country place put\\njust where, if she were in the city, her town\\naddress would be, which is in the left hand\\nlower corner.\\nIf a woman receives at home cards for\\nTuesdays in February, and is prevented\\nfrom calling on any of the Tuesdays, she\\nshould send her card in an envelope, either\\nby hand or mail, on the first Tuesday, and\\ncall on the hostess at the earliest opportunity\\non some other day.\\nA man should use a card engraved, as\\nMr. George Wellington Smith, not\\nomitting the prefix, with the address in one\\ncorner, if desired. The size of the card\\nvaries from time to time, but it is smaller\\nthan a woman s card.\\nThe names of mother and daughter or\\ndaughters are often engraved on one card; as,\\nMRS. JUDSON BROWN.\\nMISS ANNA BNOWN.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0025.jp2"}, "26": {"fulltext": "18 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nmrs. judson brown,\\nthe; missks brown.\\nThe following is the usual form for an\\nunmarried woman s card:\\nMISS MAY BROWN,\\n12 PINE) ST.\\nIt is quite proper for a woman to retain\\nher deceased husband s name on her visiting\\ncards; as, Mrs. John Smith. Itisequally\\nproper for her to use Mrs. Jane Smith\\nfor the purpose.\\nWhen a caller is met by the hostess at\\nthe door, she should drop her card in the\\ncard receiver or leave it on the hall table on\\nher way out. The object of such a card is\\nnot to introduce people when visiting, but\\nas a reminder of the visit.\\nP. P. C. cards should be left on the\\noccasion of a long absence (of over three", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0026.jp2"}, "27": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 19\\nmonths) on leaving town at the close of the\\nseason; on leaving a neighborhood where\\none has resided for years, or where one has\\nresided for months and sometimes only for\\nweeks, but not when changing houses in the\\nsame neighborhood, not even when about\\nto be married, unless one s furture home is\\nto be in another city. The words pom\\nprendre congi signify to take leave.\\nR. S. V. P. means Repondez s il vous\\nplait which is the French for Answer,\\nif you please.\\nTurning down the corner of a visiting\\ncard, meaning that the call was made in\\nperson, is no longer in vogue. One might\\nleave her card in person, writing on it\\nWith kind inquiries, when sickness or\\ndeath has entered the household of a friend,\\nand thus show a delicate courtesy.\\nIt is proper for a hostess to shake hands\\nwith a man visitor on his arrival and at his\\ndeparture.\\nIt is an evidence of very bad taste for a\\nyoung woman to send wedding cards to a\\nmarried man without including his wife s\\nname, even if she has no acquaintance what-\\never with her.\\nA young girl who is not out does not\\nhave visiting cards. If she is the oldest or\\nonly daughter and is in society, her cards\\nhave upon them Miss Smith.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0027.jp2"}, "28": {"fulltext": "20 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nA woman should never ask a man for-\\nmally calling to take his hat, or a woman to\\nlay aside her wraps.\\nA card sent to an afternoon reception\\nrepresents one s self. It should be sent\\neither by mail or messenger, and never by a\\nfriend to deposit upon the receiver with her\\nown card.\\nVISITING.\\nA guest should always ascertain what are\\nthe usual hours of rising, taking meals, and\\nretiring, and then conform scrupulously to\\nthem.\\nGuests should give as little trouble as\\npossible, and never apologize for the extra\\ntrouble their visit necessarily occasions.\\nIf a ride, drive, or walk is proposed by\\none of the family entertaining, a guest\\nshould acquiesce as far as her strength will\\nallow, and do all in her power to seen\\npleased by the efforts, made for her enter-\\ntainment.\\nUpon taking one s departure, it is ex-\\npected and reasonably, too that some\\nacknowledgment be made of the pleasure\\nthat has been afforded one.\\nIt is also proper upon returning home to\\ninform the friends just left of one s safe\\narrival.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0028.jp2"}, "29": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER II.\\nNotes of Invitation, Announcement\\nCards, Wedding Invitations, Ac-\\nceptances and Regrets, Let-\\nters, Letters of\\nIntroduction.\\nPoliteness is one of those advantages\\nwhich we never estimate rightly, but by the\\ninconvenience of its loss. Samuel Johnson.\\nNOTES OF INVITATION.\\nNotes of invitation for evening parties\\nare issued in the name of the lady of the\\nhouse; as,\\nMrs. James Little requests the pleasure of\\nMr. and Mrs. George White s company on\\nMonday evening, March seventeenth, from\\nnine to twelve o clock*\\nThe expression presents compliments is\\nobsolete, as is also the term polite, which\\nwas formerly used in acceptances or regrets.\\nThe English form of kind or very\\nkind is now substituted in its place.\\n*It is now quite common to omit marks of punct-\\nuation at the end of lines in an invitation.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0029.jp2"}, "30": {"fulltext": "22 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nA very acceptable form of invitation for a\\nmother (if the mother is not living, the\\nfather s name may be so used) and daugh-\\nter is this:\\nMrs. and Miss Graves at Home, Thurs-\\nday, October twenty -seventh, from eight to\\neleveii o clock.\\nWhen a very large dinner party is to\\nbe given, the invitations should be issued\\nat least two weeks in advance; and if some\\nvery celebrated people are to be invited,\\ntwenty-one days should elapse between\\nsending out the invitations and the day\\nof the function. For a small affair ten\\ndays notice is sufficient. Invitations to\\nlarge teas should be sent out fourteen days\\nin advance, but for small ones a week s no-\\ntice is sufficient.\\nIn answering an invitation sent out in the\\nname of both mother and daughter, one\\nshould address the mother.\\nWhen sending out invitations to evening\\nparties, it is customary to denote the amuse-\\nment feature, if there is to be one, by nam-\\ning it in the lower left hand corner; as,\\nDancing, or Cards, or Fancy dress\\nand masks. The hour is designated thus\\nDancing after nine, or German at eight\\no clock, or Supper at half after seven,\\nand underneath Dancing. Sometimes a", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0030.jp2"}, "31": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 23\\nseparate card is enclosed, reading Dancing\\nat nine o clock.\\nMrs. George Brown requests the pleasure\\nof Miss Lee s company on Tuesday evening,\\nfa?iuary seventh, at nine o clock.\\nDancing. 221 Thirty -fifth Street.\\nThe correct form of invitation for an en-\\ntertainment where an elocutionist is to be\\nthe principal feature is worded as follows:\\nMrs. James Smith requests the pleasure of\\nMr. and Mrs. Brown s company on Thurs-\\nday evening, December the first, at eight\\no clock.\\n124. Jewell Avenue.\\nReading by Professor William White.\\nAn invitation to a rose or lawn party\\nmight read thus:\\nMrs. James Smith.\\nThe Misses Smith.\\nat home\\nTuesday evening, June the twenty-eighth,\\nat eight o clock.\\nrose party to meet\\n212 Sheridan Avenue. The Misses White.\\nIn writing invitations for a club for which\\none is acting as secretary it would be wise\\nto put them in the third person, and then\\nthere would be no embarrassment about the\\narrangement of names.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0031.jp2"}, "32": {"fulltext": "24 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nThe words reception and at home\\nare synonymous. Bach means an enter-\\ntainment which takes place between certain\\nstated hours in the afternoon or evening,\\nwhere refreshments are served, and no\\nespecial order of amusement is provided,\\nunless it is specified in the invitations. To\\na reception or at home the hostess\\ngenerally sends invitations to all on her call-\\ning list. These large functions are usuallv\\ngiven for some especial purpose; as, to\\nintroduce a debutante into society, to cele-\\nbrate a wedding anniversary, or for the\\nbride and groom after the wedding ceremony,\\nor merely that the hostess may meet all her\\nfriends.\\nThere is, however, a decided distinction\\nbetween a reception or an at home and a\\ntea or days. An invitation to the first is\\nengraved on a sheet of note paper or a large\\nsized card, and is formally worded. The\\nhours for the afternoon function are usually\\nfrom four until seven, and one may expect\\nto find at the house or place of entertain-\\nment decorations of flowers and greens, and\\nquite an elaborate repast provided; but an\\ninvitation to a tea or to days does not\\nimply that anything but the simplest kind\\nof menu will be served, nor that any but\\nsimple preparations will be made. The\\ninvitations to the latter entertainments may\\nbe the hostess s visiting cards with the", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0032.jp2"}, "33": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 25\\naddress and tea at four o clock written in\\none corner; or if the hostess prefers to\\nreceive informally on more than one day,\\nshe may have the form Fridays, or Fri-\\ndays in February, or First and third\\nFridays in February, or whatever days she\\nchooses, written or engraved on her cards.\\nThe formal luncheon hour is from one to\\ntwo o clock. Afternoon teas are usually at\\nfive. One s visiting card can be used only\\nfor an invitation for an afternoon at home;\\ninvitations to dinner or luncheon must be\\nwritten out. In sending out cards for a tea\\none should simply write the date and the\\nhour in the lower left-hand corner; in\\nsending a note, whether by messenger or\\npost, the number of the house and the name\\nof the street should be written out in full.\\nThe following is a good form of invitation\\nto an at home given by several women:\\nMrs. James Smith\\nMrs. Charges White\\nMrs. Frederick Brown\\nat home\\nSaturday, April the sixteenth\\nat four o clock\\n112 Madison Street\\nThe usual form of an invitation to a\\nluncheon is as follows:", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0033.jp2"}, "34": {"fulltext": "26 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nMrs. James Brown\\nrequests the pleasure of your company\\nat luncheon\\non wednesday, april the sixth,\\nat one o clock.\\nBelow this and to the right would be the\\naddress, and the date on which the invita-\\ntion is written.\\nThe invitation for a musical may be\\nworded as follows:\\nMrs. James Smith requests the pleasure of\\nMiss Brown s company on Friday afternoon\\nMarch seventeenth, at two o clock.\\nJHusic\\nP. S. V. P. 2 4 Queen Avenue.\\nANNOUNCEMENT CARDS.\\nThe simplest way to announce an engage-\\nment is for each of the engaged couple to\\nwrite short notes of announcement on the\\nsame day to each one s relatives and near\\nfriends. All these notes are sent so that\\nthey will be received at the same time.\\nThey are written in the first person on\\ndainty note paper, and the best form is the\\nsimplest. The character of the note must\\ndepend on the intimacy between the writer\\nand the recipient.\\nA pretty and fashionable sequence to the\\nannouncement is for the bride to give a tea", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0034.jp2"}, "35": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 27\\nfor the express purpose of receiving con-\\ngratulations. She may mention it in her\\nnotes of announcement, and h rfiancS may\\nmention in his notes that she will be at home\\non a certain day at a certain hour. She\\nshould then receive with her mother or some\\nolder relative, and she should have some\\nlight refreshment provided for her callers.\\nAll her young friends will call, and all the\\nrelatives and near friends of her fiance. The\\nfiaiice should be present at the tea, or he\\nmay come before it is over, but he should\\nnot formally receive with his betrothed.\\nEngagements are often announced in the\\nnewspapers.\\nWedding announcements or invitations\\nshould be sent in envelopes addressed to\\nthe father and mother of the family, to the\\ndaughter or daughters (addressed as the\\nMisses), and to each of the grown sons.\\nAll these invitations in their envelopes may\\nbe enclosed in an outside envelope addressed\\nto the parents.\\nA wedding invitation or announcement\\ncard should always be addressed to both\\nmembers of a married couple, even if the\\nbride or groom who sends it is acquainted\\nwith only one.\\nThe correct form for wedding announce-\\nment cards is as follows:", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0035.jp2"}, "36": {"fulltext": "28 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE,\\nMr. and Mrs. John Smith\\nannounce the marriage of their daughter,\\nAnna\\nTO\\nMr. Frank Brown\\non Saturday, October the twenty-second,\\neighteen hundred and ninety-nine.\\nWashington, D. C.\\nThe bride s at home cards should be\\nseparate, but enclosed with the announce-\\nments, and should read as follows:\\nAt Home\\nTuesday afternoons in January.\\n125 West Fifteenth Street,\\nNew York City.\\nAnnouncement cards should be sent out\\nimmediately after the wedding to every one\\non the bride s and groom s list. And, again,\\nwedding announcement cards need not be\\nsent out in any one s name. The follow-\\ning is an example:\\nMarried\\non Wednesday, January the eighteenth,\\neighteen hundred and ninety-nine\\nat St. Thomas Church\\nNew York,\\nMargaret Baker White\\nto\\nWilliam Barton.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0036.jp2"}, "37": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 29\\nWhen a bride is an orphan it is customary\\nfor the cards announcing her wedding to be\\nsent in the name of one of her near relatives,\\nor else they may read simply like the one\\ngiven above.\\nWedding announcement cards demand\\nno acknowledgment from an acquaintance\\nof the bride who lives at a distance, unless\\na day or days are mentioned on them,\\nwhen it is obligatory to send visiting cards\\non the day or the first one of the daj s;\\notherwise, if one wishes to be particularly\\npolite, one may send a visiting-card in ac-\\nknowledgment of the announcement, but it\\nis not obligatory to do so.\\nWedding announcements are sent to\\nfriends at home as well as to those abroad,\\nbecause the cards are supposed, not only to\\nsuggest remembrance, but to express a de-\\nsire that the acquaintance should be con-\\ntinued after the name is changed.\\nThe birth of a baby is announced in vari-\\nous ways, there being no especial rules of\\netiquette for making the announcement.\\nSometimes engraved cards bearing the baby s\\nname and date of birth are sent by them-\\nselves in small envelopes, into which they\\nfit exactly; sometimes they go in an envel-\\nope with the mother s visiting-card, and are\\nwritten instead of engraved. These cards\\nshould be attached to the mother s visiting", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0037.jp2"}, "38": {"fulltext": "30 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\ncards by a piece of white baby ribbon, which\\nis passed through a hole made in the top of\\nboth cards and tied in a tiny bow. They\\nshould be sent out when the mother is\\nready to receive calls.\\nWEDDING INVITATIONS.\\nWedding invitations should be issued at\\nleast two weeks before the day of the affair.\\nIt is customary for the bridegroom to give\\nto the bride s mother a list of his relatives\\nand friends to whom he would like cards\\nsent, and some member of the bride s family\\nattends to it.\\nWhen the guests at a wedding are lim-\\nited to the immediate family, the invita-\\ntions may be personal notes sent by the\\nbride s mother. The notes may read like\\nthe following:\\nMy Dear Mary, It will give us all much pleas-\\nure if you will come to the very quiet wedding of\\nmy daughter Catherine to Mr.fohn Martin, on\\nSaturday, February the fourth, at twelve o clock,\\nand remain to the little breakfast that will follow\\nthe ceremony. Only the members of the family will\\nbe present. Hoping that you may be with us the\\nfourth, I am,\\nAffectionately yours,\\nAnna Brown.\\nA formal invitation may read as follows:", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0038.jp2"}, "39": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 31\\nMr. and Mrs. James M. Moore\\nREQUEST THE PLEASURE OE YOUR PRESENCE AT\\nTHE MARRIAGE OE THEIR DAUGHTER\\nAEICE\\nTO\\nCharges Albert Smith,\\nThursday Evening, August twenty-eourth,\\nat eight o clock,\\n121 Seventh Street Bast,\\nDavenport, Iowa,\\n1899.\\nAnother form is as follows\\nMr. and Mrs. John Brown\\nrequest the pleasure oe your presence\\nAT THE\\nmarriage breakfast oe their daughter\\nMary Louise\\nAND\\nMr. Charees Aebert Smith,\\non Thursday, October the sixth,\\nfrom one untie three o ceock.\\n15 Prospect Street.\\nIf the bride is an orphan, or if there is\\nany very good reason why her parents names\\nshould not appear on the invitation, the\\nlatter v 2Ly be sent in the name of the mar-\\nried brother and his wife, or in the name of\\nwhoever gives the bride the wedding recep-\\ntion. It may read as follows:", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0039.jp2"}, "40": {"fulltext": "32 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nMr. amd Mrs. Charles Smith\\nrequest the honor of your presence\\nat the marriage of their sister\\nbertha wild\\nto\\nMr. James Montgomery Brown,\\non Wednesday, October the twelfth,\\nat eight o clock.\\n2400 Fifth Street South.\\nThe following is a suitable form for an\\ninvitation for a silver wedding\\nTwenty-fifth Anniversary.\\nMr. and Mrs. John H. Smith\\nat Home\\nSaturday Ev g, December twenty-seventh,\\nEighteen hundred ninety nine,\\nFrom eight to eleven o clock.\\nACCEPTANCES AND REGRETS.\\nIt is considered very rude not to reply to\\nan invitation immediately, either by note\\nof acceptance or regret.\\nIn writing acceptances one should never\\nuse will accept for accepts, or to\\ndinner instead of for dinner or to\\ndine.\\nIn accepting a dinner invitation one should\\nrepeat the hour named in order that, if any\\nmistake has been made, it may be cor-\\nrected.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0040.jp2"}, "41": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 33\\nAn acceptance may be written as follows:\\nMr. and Mrs. Frank Warren accept with\\npleasure Mrs. John Somers ki?idinvitatio?ifor\\nMonday eveniyig, October seventh.\\nThe following is a good form for a note\\nof regret:\\nMr. and Mrs. James Swift regret that,\\nowing to sickness, they are unable to accept\\nMrs. Frank Hall s kind invitation for Mon-\\nday evening, March 16th.\\nIn writing regrets, when it is possible to\\ndo so, one should give the reason for not\\naccepting an invitation.\\nThe best bred people agree that an invi-\\ntation to a wedding reception or a wedding\\nbreakfast demands a response, whether or\\nnot a response is requested. But it is another\\nquestion when one receives only an invi-\\ntation to a church ceremony, or merely an\\nannouncement card with no at home card\\nenclosed, and does not know the bride and\\ngroom well enough to call. If the cards\\nare sent merely as a matter of courtesy\\nbecause of business relations or on account\\nof a former intimacy in the families, a call\\ndoes not seem necessary. In such cases one\\nmust judge more or less for herself, and do\\nwhat seems natural. If one lives in a small\\nplace and the bride comes there as a\\nstranger, it is generally the best way to call,\\nwhatever be the form of the cards received.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0041.jp2"}, "42": {"fulltext": "34 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nFormal invitations to a church wedding\\ndo not demand an answer, unless one is\\nrequested, until the day of the ceremony,\\nwhen those unable to attend acknowledge\\nthe invitation with visiting cards addressed\\nto the father and mother of the bride, or to\\nwhoever sends out the invitations for the\\nwedding. Invitations to a wedding recep-\\ntion and a bride s At Home demand no\\nother acknowledgment than visiting cards\\nsent on the day of the function by those\\nunable to attend. A formal invitation to a\\nhouse wedding demands the same acknow-\\nledgment as an invitation to a church\\nwedding.\\nIn acknowledging an invitation to a wed-\\nding, a single woman sends one of her visit-\\ning cards in an envelope addressed to the\\nmother and father of the bride on the day of\\nthe wedding. A single man sends two of\\nhis cards, and a married couple send one of\\nthe wife s and two of the husband s cards.\\nTo the bride on her At Home day, cards\\nshould be sent in exactly the same way. A\\nwedding reception, if it takes place in the\\nevening, demands full dress.\\nIt is very courteous to acknowledge the\\nreception of a commencement invitation.\\nIt is very bad form to write Congratu-\\nlations on one s visiting card and send it\\nin answer to a wedding invitation. If one", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0042.jp2"}, "43": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 35\\ndesires to send her good wishes to the bride,\\nthen a personal note would be proper.\\nIt is also bad form to send a visiting card\\nwith Regrets written in one corner in-\\nstead of writing the proper note.\\nIf, having accepted an invitation, one\\nchanges her mind, she certainly ought to\\ngive some reason when writing a note of\\napology.\\nLETTERS.\\nIn writing letters and notes of invitation,\\nacceptance, regrets, or introduction, certain\\nand specific rules of etiquette, ordained by\\ncustom, hold despotic sway; and unless one\\nis acquainted with these, he must be con-\\nsidered by those who are, as more or less\\nuncultivated.\\nIn addressing an envelope one surely\\nought to know that the first line of the\\naddress should be at or below the middle\\nof the envelope, and the address should be\\nwritten in a plain hand devoid of flourishes.\\nThe place for the stamp is always the upper\\nright-hand corner.\\nIn no way is one s culture sooner made\\nknown than by his manner of writing a note\\nor letter.\\nIn a formal business letter or in one\\ncommencing Dear Sir or Dear Madam,\\nthe name of the person addressed is put at", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0043.jp2"}, "44": {"fulltext": "36 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE\\nthe end of the letter in the left-hand cor-\\nner, but it should not be repeated, if it is\\nused at the head of the letter.\\nThe writing of notes in the third person\\nis now confined to notes of invitations,\\nacceptance, and regret.\\nNothing would show greater ignorance\\nthan signing one s name to a note written\\nin the third person.\\nIn addressing a clergyman it is customary\\nto commence with Reverend Sir. Doc-\\ntors of Divinity and of Medicine are thus\\ndistinguished: The Rev. James Swift, D.\\nD., or Rev. Dr. Swift; I. G. Latham,\\nM. D., or Dr. Latham.\\nIn writing to servants, it is customary to\\nbegin thus: To Mary Bates, Mrs. White\\nwishes, etc.\\nWhen a woman is writing to strangers who\\nwill not know whether to address her in re-\\nply as Mrs. or Miss, the address of\\nthe writer should be given in full, after\\nsigning her letter, as, Mrs. Jane Smith,\\nfollowed by the direction; or, if unmarried,\\nthe Miss should be placed in marks of par-\\nenthesis preceding the signature. One\\nshould never sign her name as Mrs. or\\nMiss.\\nThe formal manner of address in a note\\nor letter written in the first person, is, My", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0044.jp2"}, "45": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 3?\\nDear Mrs. Brown; the less formal is Dear\\nMrs. Brown. To an intimate friend one\\nmay use either. Dear Mary is less for-\\nmal than My Dear Mary, and yet to one\\nwho is near, the real significance of the\\nlatter form is very sweet and full of tender\\nmeaning. However, there are no rigid laws\\nto regulate the correspondence of friends.\\nWhen a woman writes a personal note to\\na man, no matter how slight her acquaint-\\nance may be with him, it should begin My\\nDear Mr. Brown.\\nOrdinary social correspondence, when\\nforwarded by the hand of an adult socially\\nequal with the sender, should not be sealed.\\nIf, for some reason, a letter must be sealed,\\nthen the post or some other method of\\nletter conveyance should be used.\\nThe form Addressed on an envelope is\\nmerely the relic of an old legal form that\\nhas no especial significance nowadays, but\\nis put on the envelope as a matter of\\ncourtesy. It means that the contents of\\nthe envelope are for the person whose\\nname is written on the outside. It is very\\nseldom used, and is quite superfluous.\\nOnly letters of unmarried women and\\nwidows are addressed with their baptismal\\nnames. All letters of married women should\\nbear their husband s names; as, Mrs. John\\nHowe.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0045.jp2"}, "46": {"fulltext": "38 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nWriting on the first, then on the third,\\nthen crosswise on the second and fourth\\npages of a letter, facilitates the reading and\\nis in perfectly good form.\\nIt is very bad taste for a doctor s wife to\\nassume his title. An invitation addressed\\nto them should read Dr. and Mrs. Jones.\\nOne should not write Mrs. John Brown,\\nnee Lottie Smith, because one is not born\\nwith a Christian name; instead, one would\\nwrite Mrs. John Brown, nee Smith.\\nThe use of perfumed stationery is not\\ngeneral, nor is it in good taste.\\nAny letter of congratulation received, even\\nthough it be from a person with whom one\\nhas only a slight acquaintance, requires an\\nanswer.\\nNo matter how fond a young girl may\\nfeel of a man whom she has known for\\nyears, any letters, when trouble comes to\\nhis family, should be addressed to his wife\\nand not to him.\\nThe fashion that obtains with reference\\nto placing the date on a letter is to place it\\nin the upper right-hand corner; on a note it\\nis usually placed in the lower left-hand\\ncorner.\\nA young girl who receives letters from a\\nman at the post-office without the knowl-\\nedge of her mother is doing something", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0046.jp2"}, "47": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 39\\nwrong, which in time she will certainly re-\\ngret, and which, it is equally certain, will\\nresult in trouble.\\nIt is not in the best taste to write letters of\\nfriendship on the typewriter, but it will al-\\nways be excused in the busy woman.\\nLETTERS OF INTRODUCTION.\\nletters of introduction are to be regarded\\nas certificates of respectability and esteem,\\nand should only be given by friends of the\\nperson introduced and to friends. They\\nshould be brief and carefully worded, inti-\\nmating the mutual pleasure that one feels\\nthe acquaintance will confer, but not com-\\nplimenting the bearer so openly that he\\nwill feel embarrassed in delivering the let-\\nter. Such letters are left unsealed.\\nThere is no greater insult than to treat a\\nletter of introduction with indifference. A\\nperson thus introduced ought to be called\\nupon at once, and shown any other little\\nattention within one s power. In England\\nletters of introduction are called tickets to\\nsoup.\\nIn England the party holding a letter of\\nintroduction never takes it himself, but\\nsends it with his card. On the Continent\\nthe reverse is the fashion. In America the\\nEnglish custom prevails, though where a\\nyoung man has a letter to one many years", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0047.jp2"}, "48": {"fulltext": "4o Practical etiquette.\\nhis senior or to one who is to aid him in\\nsome enterprise, he takes it himself at once.\\nA letter of introduction should be some-\\nwhat like the following:\\nMy Dear Mr. Barnes:\\nThis note will introduce to you my friend, Mr.\\nCharles Smith, whom I know you will be as glad\\nto meet as he will be glad to meet you.\\nMr. Smith is an old friend of mine, and any\\nkindness you may be able to show him will be very\\nmuch appreciated by me.\\nFaithfully yours,\\nAnna Martin White.\\nBefore giving a letter of introduction one\\nshould be certain that the persons intro-\\nduced will be congenial to each other. Such\\na letter puts a certain obligation on the per-\\nson to whom it is addressed: he will be\\nobliged to show the bearer some attention\\nand hospitality. It is, therefore, not right\\nto make the demand of a friend unless one\\nis certain that the acquaintanceship will\\ncompensate him for the trouble he may-\\ntake.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0048.jp2"}, "49": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER III.\\nDinners, Luncheons, Breakfasts, Teas,\\nReceptions, Dancing Parties, Cards,\\nParties, Weddings, Wedding\\nGifts, Wedding Anni-\\nversaries.\\nManners aim to facilitate life, to get rid of\\nimpediments.\\nDINNERS.*\\nA dinner is supposed to be an elaborate\\naffair, with numerous courses and ample ser-\\nvice, and is usually given at seven or eight\\no clock in the evening. At a dinner the\\nnumber of courses naturally varies according\\nto the taste and financial condition of the\\nhostess. (For arrangement of the table, see\\nChapter VI.)\\nFor a formal dinner the courses usually\\nconsist of soup, fish, a roast with one or\\nmore vegetables, a salad, an ice or icecream,\\ncakes, bonbons, and black coffee. Olives\\nand salted almonds, jellies, etc., generally\\nappear in some of the courses.\\n*In looking up any one point in this book, as\\ndinners, for instance, one will be obliged some-\\ntimes to refer to more than one place. Chapter II.,\\nunder Notes of Invitation, and Chapter I., under\\nits three different heads, contain more or less infor-\\nmation concerning dinners which it seems diffi-\\ncult to classify anymore closely than has been done.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0049.jp2"}, "50": {"fulltext": "42 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nAlthough the following really belongs\\nunder the head of The Table and Ser-\\nvice at Table, a repetition here may not\\ncome amiss.\\nThe attendant places each dish, in suc-\\ncession, before the host or hostess with the\\npile of plates. Each plate is supplied, taken\\nby the attendant on a small salver, and set,\\nfrom the left, before the guest. A second\\ndish which belongs to the course is pre-\\nsented at the left of the guest, who helps\\nhimself. As a rule the woman at the right\\nof the host, or the eldest woman, should be\\nserved first. As soon as a course is finished,\\nthe plates are promptly removed, and the\\nnext course is served in the same way.\\nBefore the dessert is brought on, all crumbs\\nshould be brushed from the cloth. The\\nfinger bowls, which are brought in on a\\nnapkin on a dessert-plate and set at the left\\nof the plate, are used by dipping the fingers\\nin lightly and drying them on the napkin.\\nThey should be half full of warm water with\\na bit of lemon floating in it. When all\\nhave finished dessert, the hostess gives the\\nsignal, by pushing back her chair, that din-\\nner is ended, and the guests repair to the\\ndrawing-room, the oldest leading and the\\nyoungest following last, the men passing\\ninto the library or smoking-room.\\nSeemingly, one should arrive at the house\\nwhere one is invited to a dinner or a", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0050.jp2"}, "51": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\n43\\nluncheon at exactly the hour mentioned in\\nthe invitation; but the proper thing at a\\nformal function is to get to the house ten\\nminutes after the hour of the meal, and to\\nbe announced in the drawing-room five\\nminutes later.\\nThe host, with the guest of honor, leads\\nthe way into the dining-room at a dinner;\\nat a luncheon the hostess leads the way\\nalone or with one of the guests.\\nFifteen minutes is the longest time re-\\nquired to wait for a tardy guest when the\\ndinner hour was understood, as it always\\nshould be.\\nIf the hostess thinks the visitor has no\\nacquaintances in the room, she introduces\\nher to two or three persons who are near\\nher, and then, counting on her knowledge\\nof the customs of society, she will feel quite\\nsure that her guest will enjoy herself.\\nA hostess should never reprove a servant\\nbefore a guest, as it is unpleasant for all\\nconcerned, and by passing over the annoy-\\nance herself, it ma} escape the attention of\\nothers.\\nNo accident must seem to distrub a hostess,\\nno disappointment embarrass her.\\nAt formal dinner parties the servant who\\nis detailed to attend to the wants of the men\\nguests hands each one, as he leaves the", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0051.jp2"}, "52": {"fulltext": "44 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\ndressing-room, an envelope containing a\\ncard bearing the name of the woman whom\\nhe is to take to dinner.\\nLUNCHEONS.\\nIyUncheons are usually given between the\\nhours of one and two o clock in the after-\\nnoon, and to them women only are invited.\\nThe menu is lighter than for a dinner, and\\ngenerally consists of sherbets, oyster patties,\\nscalloped oysters, sweet-breads, sandwiches,\\nsalads, ices, cheese sticks, fruit, ice cream,\\ncakes, bonbons, salted almonds, olives, and\\nblack coffee, served in such number and\\norder of courses as best suits the hostess.\\nBREAKFASTS.\\nThe difference between a breakfast and a\\nluncheon is very slight. On the invitation\\nthe word breakfast is used instead of lunch-\\neon, and the hour is earlier than for a lunch-\\neon. Also men and woman may meet to-\\ngether for a breakfast, and therefore a few\\nmore solid courses are advisable. Other-\\nwise one may be guided entirely in giving\\nthe entertainment by the rules which apply\\nto a luncheon.\\nTEAS.\\nA tea is the simplest and easiest kind of\\nan entertainment to give, for the only\\nessential requisites for its success are prettily", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0052.jp2"}, "53": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 45\\narranged receiving-rooms, with as many-\\nflowers as one can afford; a gracious hostess,\\nwho stands during the hours of the function\\nto receive her guests and is properly dressed\\nin a becoming high-necked house dress; a\\nfew other women, who also receive in pretty\\ndresses; and a dainty tea table, which may\\nbe presided over by a woman friend or two\\nof the hostess. It is only necessary to serve\\na modest menu of tea, chocolate or bouillon,\\nassorted sandwiches, fancy cakes, and bon-\\nbons, The other factors to the tea s success\\nare pleasant weather and well trained ser-\\nvants, who may assist in serving the tea\\nand are alert to open and close the door for\\nthe guests.\\nAt a formal function of any kind the guests\\nleave their wraps in dressing-rooms, where\\none or more maids should be on hand to assist\\nwomen in their dressing-room, and a man\\nto perform the same services in the men s\\ndressing-room; but at a small tea, where, as\\na rule, the guests do not remove their street\\nwraps, it is only necessary to have a maid\\nin the entrance hall to be ready, if called on,\\nto do any service.\\nIt is not customary to offer refreshments\\nto casual evening callers; but if one has a\\nregular evening for receiving, she may have\\na tea table in the drawing-room, and serve\\ntea, chocolate, sandwiches, cake, etc., as in\\nentertaining on the afternoon of a day.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0053.jp2"}, "54": {"fulltext": "46 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nRECEPTIONS.\\nOn the day of the reception, the hostess,\\nwith her assistants, should receive the\\nguests, standing at the door of the drawing-\\nroom. The refreshment tables should be\\nspread in the dining-room, and prettily\\ndecorated with flowers, candles in candel-\\nabra or candlesticks, dishes of bonbons and\\ncakes, plates of sandwiches, and platters of\\nsalad. A bouillon urn may stand at one\\nend of the table with cups, and coffee may\\nbe served from the other end. All that is\\nnecessary for the menu is bouillon, easily\\nprepared in the house from canned bouillon,\\njellied tongue, chicken salad, and sand-\\nwiches, ices and cake, fruit, and candies.\\nCoffee and lemonade will suffice for bever-\\nages. If one can aflord to have a few pieces\\nof music, so much the better. The musi-\\ncians should play from some hidden nook.\\nOne or two servants in the dining-room, and\\none to open and shut the front door, will be\\nall that is necessary.\\nDANCING PARTIES.\\nFor the form of invitation refer to Chap-\\nter II.\\nIn selecting a company for a dancing\\nparty the hostess will naturally choose only\\nthose who dance, and she should see, as far\\nas possible, that all the women are provided\\nwith partners.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0054.jp2"}, "55": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 47\\nIt is better to dance first with one acquain-\\ntance and then with another, rather than to\\nmake one s self conspicuous by giving a\\ngreat number of dances to one man.\\nA man gives the first and last dances to\\nhis partner of the evening.\\nNo man should invite a young woman to\\nattend a dress affair without providing a\\ncarriage for her. When the party is small\\nand informal, it is allowable to go on the\\nstreet-cars.\\nAt the end of the dance, the man should\\noffer his arm to his partner, and take at least\\none turn around the room before consigning\\nher to her seat.\\nA man who can dance, and will not,\\nought to remain away from a ball.\\nIf for any reason a girl should refuse to\\ndance with one man, she should not accept\\nanother invitation for the same dance.\\nAn invitation to a ball may be asked for a\\nfriend who is a stranger in town, and has\\nhad no opportunity of making the acquain-\\ntance of the one who gives the ball.\\nA man should not ask a girl, to whom he\\nhas been introduced for the purpose of danc-\\ning with her, for more than two dances the\\nsame evening.\\nCARD PARTIES.\\nIf given, prizes should be carefully chosen,\\nso that they may be in good taste and", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0055.jp2"}, "56": {"fulltext": "48 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\ndesirable. The supper should be served at\\nthe card tables after the the playing is over.\\nA large napkin should be spread on the top\\nof each table, and the refreshments served\\nin courses.\\nWEDDINGS.\\nFor invitation forms see Chapter II.\\nWhen a wedding takes place in a church\\nthat has but one entrance, the customary\\nway for the bridal procession to enter is\\nfor the groom and best man to walk in just\\nbehind the minister, a little before the others,\\nand to take their places at the altar; then\\nthe ushers enter, walking two by two; then\\nthe bridesmaids in the same order; then the\\nmaid of honor alone; and last the bride on\\nher father s arm. The bride s family enter\\nthe church a few minutes before the minis-\\nter and the groom and bridal party.\\nA bride goes up to the altar with her veil\\nover her face, but comes down with it\\nthrown back. It is the duty of the maid\\nof honor to throw it back immediately after\\nthe ceremony is ended.\\nWhen the bride s mother gives her away\\nat a church ceremony, she usually walks up\\nthe aisle with the bride. After she has\\ngiven her to the groom, she steps quietly\\nand unescorted to the front pew, where she\\nstays during the remainder of the service.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0056.jp2"}, "57": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 49\\nThe bride may walk up the aisle with an\\nattendant instead of with her mother, who\\nin this case steps from her seat in the front\\npew to the chancel when the time comes\\nfor her to officiate, and steps back to her\\nseat afterwards.\\nThe bride and the groom should stand at\\nthe wedding reception until they have re-\\nceived the congratulations of all present,\\nthen, together, they should walk into the\\nroom where the breakfast is to be served.\\nThe others follow as they please, with the\\nexception of the parents on both sides. The\\ngroom s father usually escorts the bride s\\nmother, and vice versa.\\nIt is not the custom for a bride to remove\\nher gloves at the wedding. The inside\\nseam of the ring finger of the glove should\\nbe ripped beforehand; and when the time\\ncomes for the ring to be put on, the bride\\nmerely slips off this glove finger, and puts\\nit back again after the ring is on her finger.\\nAt no wedding service is it proper for the\\nbride to enter the church alone.\\nAt a church or house wedding where the\\nbride walks up the aisle with her sister\\nacting as the maid of honor, instead of with\\na gentleman escort, she need not take the\\narm of her attendant, as both the ladies will\\nlook more graceful if walking separately.\\nThe maid of honor should carry a bouquet,", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0057.jp2"}, "58": {"fulltext": "50 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nand the bride a bouquet, prayer-book, or\\nbible.\\nAt a home wedding the bride enters the\\n.room on the arm of her father. With a\\nshort dress she would not wear a veil.\\nThe wearing of gloves at an informal\\nwedding is entirely a matter of taste.\\nRecently at several large weddings they\\nwere omitted by the entire bridal party.\\nThe prettiest way to make an aisle for\\nthe bridal party at a house wedding is for\\nfour children to enter the room where the\\nceremony will be, just before the bridal\\nparty comes in, and separate the guests into\\ntwo groups by stretching two pieces of\\nwhite ribbon the length of the room. A\\nchild stands at each end of the two pieces\\nof ribbon, holding it while the bridal party\\nwalks up between them, and during the seiv-\\nice. Ushers may hold the ribbons instead\\nof the children, or the ends may be fastened\\naround plants which are placed at the requi-\\nsite points.\\nWhere there is no side door through\\nwhich the groom and best man may enter\\nthe room at a house wedding, they come in\\nby the principal door just before the bridal\\nparty and just after the minister.\\nIt is not customary for the men at a wed-\\nding party to kiss the bride; that is a lib-", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0058.jp2"}, "59": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 51\\nerty taken only by the immediate members\\nof the family.\\nA bride, if she wishes, may omit the\\nbridal veil, but she should then wear a\\ndainty bonnet or picture hat. The ushers\\nand best men are invited by the bride-\\ngroom.\\nIf the church wedding is a full dress one,\\nfollowed by an evening reception, it is\\nproper to wear an evening gown. If it is\\nin the daytime, a handsome visiting dress\\nand pretty bonnet are proper.\\nAt a daytime w T edding the guests seldom\\nremove their bonnets, although, of course,\\nheavy wraps are frequently laid aside. At\\nan evening affair one goes in full dress with-\\nout anything on one s head. The ushers\\npresent the guests to the bridal party. The\\nbridesmaids are spoken to by the people\\nthey know, but it is not necessary that they\\nshould be addressed by everybody.\\nA bride may wear her wedding dress\\nafter her wedding day as much or as little\\nas she chooses. For the sake of sentiment\\nmany brides like to preserve their wedding\\ndresses intact to hand down to future gen-\\nerations; but a girl who has to consider\\neconomy cannot afford to consider senti-\\nment, and often the wedding dress is con-\\nverted into a low dinner and evening gown\\nsoon after the wedding day. A bride may,", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0059.jp2"}, "60": {"fulltext": "52 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nwith perfect propriety, wear her wedding\\ndress to the reception given her after her\\nwedding by the groom s mother. Of course,\\nshe will wear it just as it was when she was\\nmarried, high in the neck, unless the recep-\\ntion takes place in the evening and demands\\nevening dress, when, according to the con-\\nventions, it must be cut low.\\nA bridegroom is always expected to fur-\\nnish the bouquets that the bride, brides-\\nmaids, and all the bride s attendants carry\\nat the wedding. He should learn from the\\nbride the flowers she wishes, and should\\norder them several days before the wed-\\nding, so that they may be ready at the\\nbride s house when the bridesmaids meet\\nthere to go together to the church or to the\\nplace where the ceremony is held.\\nBesides furnishing these bouquets, the\\ngroom provides the ushers and best men\\nwith their boutonnieres and gives them also\\nsome small souvenir, and, if he wishes, a\\nbachelor dinner or supper a day or two be-\\nfore the wedding.\\nThere are no wedding luncheons nowa-\\ndays. Every entertainment of the kind up\\nto two o clock is called a breakfast, and\\nwhen it takes place in the afternoon or\\nevening it is called a reception.\\nWEDDING GIFTS.\\nThe idea that a wedding invitation neces-", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0060.jp2"}, "61": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 53\\nsitates a present has, sensibly enough, gone\\nout of fashion, and only those who are\\nbound by ties of blood or close friendship\\nhave the privilege of sending a gift to the\\nbride.\\nPresents should be sent as soon after re-\\nceiving the invitations as possible. All wed-\\nding gifts, even from friends of the groom\\nwho may never have met the bride, are sent\\nto the bride; and, if marked, they should\\nbe engraved with the initials or monogram\\nof the bride s maiden name, or they may\\nhave her name in full.\\nWedding presents should be acknowl-\\nedged by the bride- elect in a short personal\\nnote, which should be written and sent im-\\nmediately on receipt of the present.\\nWhen several friends combine in giving a\\npresent to the bride, she should write a let-\\nter of thanks to each one separately, send-\\ning the letters by post.\\nIt is perfectly proper to open a gift in the\\npresence of the giver, and express one s\\npleasure and gratitude on the spot. Indeed,\\nit is much better form to do so than to wait\\nuntil the giver has gone.\\nWEDDING ANNIVERSARIES.\\nThe paper wedding, so termed, is cele-\\nbrated one year after marriage. Invitations\\nshould be be issued on heavy gray paper or", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0061.jp2"}, "62": {"fulltext": "54 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nthin card-board. Presents may consist of\\nany article made of paper or papier machi;\\nsuch, for instance, as books, engravings,\\netc.\\nThe wooden wedding is celebrated five\\nyears after marriage. Invitations may be\\nissued upon wooden cards, or wooden cards\\nmay be inclosed with an invitation written\\nor engraved upon a sheet of wedding note\\npaper. The presents may be anything\\nmade of wood, from a mustard spoon to a\\nhouse or set of furniture.\\nThe tin wedding comes ten years after\\nmarriage- Invitation cards are sometimes\\ncovered with tin foil, or tin cards are in-\\nclosed, or, if preferred, the invitation is\\nprinted on tin bronze paper. Presents\\nshould consist of articles made of tin.\\nThe crystal wedding, fifteen years after\\nmarriage, is next in order. Cards may be\\nissued upon transparent paper, or upon\\nnote paper with a card of isinglass inclosed.\\nThe china wedding takes place twenty\\nyears after marriage. Semi-transparent\\ncardboard will answer for the invitations.\\nThe silver wedding is celebrated on the\\ntwenty-fifth anniversary, and is generally an\\noccasion of much more importance than any\\nof the foregoing anniversaries. The invi-\\ntations may be printed on silver paper, and\\nthe presents are, of course, articles of silver.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0062.jp2"}, "63": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 55\\nThe golden wedding, celebrated on the\\nfiftieth anniversary of the marriage, may be\\nsaid to be the one in which the young do\\nhomage to the old. It should be conducted\\nby the near relatives or friends of the\\ncouple, and the occasion should be made\\none of retrospect, of encouragement, and of\\ncongratulation. The invitations should be\\non white paper in gold letters, and the\\npresents should be of gold.\\nAt each of these anniversaries it is\\ncustomary to have the marriage ceremony\\nre-performed, and all arrangements for the\\ncelebration are made in about the same\\nmanner as for the first marriage.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0063.jp2"}, "64": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER IV.\\nConversation, Chaperonage, Mar-\\nriage, Domestic Etiquette\\nand Duties.\\nManners are not idle, but are the fruit of\\nnoble natures and of loyal minds.\\nCONVERSATION.\\nThe late Dr. George Ripley was wont to\\nsay that the secret of being agreeable in\\nconversation was to be honorable to the\\nideas of others. He affirmed that some\\npeople only half listened to you, because\\nthey were considering, even while you\\nspoke, with what fine words, what wealth\\nof wit, they should reply, and they began\\nto speak almost before your sentence had\\ndied upon your lips. These people, he said,\\nmight be brilliant, witty, dazzling, but\\nnever could they be agreeable. You do not\\nlove to talk to them. You feel that they\\nare impatient for their turn to come, and\\nthat they have no hospitality towards your\\nthoughts none of that gentle friendliness\\nwhich asks your idea and makes much of it.\\nThis want of hospitality to other people s\\nideas often has its root in egotism, but it is\\nequally apt to be the growth of a secret\\n56", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0064.jp2"}, "65": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 57\\nwant of self-confidence, a fear that one will\\nnot be ready to take one s own part well an\\nuneasy self-consciousness which makes real\\nsympathetic attention to the ideas of others\\nimpossible.\\nAgreeability, readiness in conversation,\\ntact and graciousness of manner are great\\naids to popularity. To possess these quali-\\nties one must have marked consideration for\\nothers, and be ever ready to manifest it.\\nOne should also be ready to recall faces and\\nnames.\\nThough one has but few facts and ideas\\nto draw upon, she may still, by making suf-\\nficient effort, become a fair conversational-\\nist. If one despair in this direction, she\\nmay at least train herself to become an in-\\nteresting listener, and she will be surprised\\nto find how popular she will be; for three-\\nquarters of the world like to talk, while to\\nlisten intelligently is a great talent. The\\ngood listener, by her evident interest in, and\\nsympathetic attention to, the matter of con-\\nversation, brings out all that is best in the\\none with whom she talks. Diffident people\\nforget their shyness in her presence, and\\nleave her with the comfortable and novel\\nconviction that they have, after all, ac-\\nquitted themselves rather well.\\nNo well-bred person would be guilty of\\nthe gross rudeness of picking up a book or", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0065.jp2"}, "66": {"fulltext": "58 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nmagazine and looking through it while\\npretending to pay heed to the talk of a\\nfriend. The assurance, I am only looking\\nat the pictures of this magazine, not reading,\\nand I hear every word you say, is no palli-\\nation of the offence. The speaker would be\\njustified in refusing to continue the con-\\nversation until the pictures had been prop-\\nerly studied. If a speech is worth hearing,\\nit is worthy of respectful and earnest atten-\\ntion.\\nNo one should ever monopolize the con-\\nversation, unless he wishes to win for him-\\nself the name of a bore.\\nA well-educated and finely cultured per-\\nson proclaims himself by the simplicity and\\nterseness of his language.\\nIn conversation all provincialisms, affecta-\\ntions of foreign accents, mannerisms, exag-\\ngerations, and slang are detestable.\\nFlippancy is as much an evidence of ill-\\nbreeding as is the perpetual smile, the\\nwandering eye, the vacant stare, or the half-\\nopen mouth of the man who is preparing to\\nbreak in upon the conversation.\\nInterruption of the speech of others is a\\ngreat sin against good breeding.\\nAnecdotes should be sparsely introduced\\ninto a conversation, lest they become stale.\\nRepartee must be indulged in with moder-\\nation. Puns are considered vulgar by many.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0066.jp2"}, "67": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 59\\nIn addressing persons with titles, one\\nought always to add the name; as, What\\ndo you think, Doctor Graves? not, What\\ndo you think, Doctor?\\nThe great secret of talking well is to\\nadapt one s conversation skillfully to the\\nhearers.\\nIn a tHe-a-tHe conversation, it is ex-\\ntremely ill-bred to drop the voice to a whis-\\nper, or to converse on private matters.\\nOne should never try to hide the lips in\\ntalking by putting up the hand or a fan.\\nOne should avoid long conversations in\\nsociety with members of his own family.\\nIf an unfinished conversation is continued\\nafter the entrance of a visitor, its import\\nshould be explained to him.\\nThough bores find their account in speak-\\ning ill or well of themselves, it is the char-\\nacteristic of a gentleman that he never\\nspeaks of himself at all. La Buryere says:\\nThe great charm of conversation consists\\nless in the display of one s own wit and\\nintelligence than in the power to draw forth\\nthe resources of others; he who leaves one\\nafter along conversation, pleased with him-\\nself and the part he has taken in the dis-\\ncourse, will be the other s warmest admirer.\\nIn society the absent-minded man is\\nuncivil.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0067.jp2"}, "68": {"fulltext": "60 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nThere are many persons who commence\\nspeaking before they know what they are\\ngoing to say. The ill-natured world, which\\nnever misses an opportunity of being severe,\\ndeclares them to be foolish and destitute of\\nbrains.\\nHe who knows the world, will not be too\\nbashful; he who knows himself, will not be\\nimprudent\\nThere is no surer sign of vulgarity than\\nthe perpetual boasting of fine things at\\nhome.\\nOne should be careful how freely he\\noffers advice.\\nIf one keeps silent sometimes upon sub-\\njects of which he is known to be a judge,\\nhis silence, when from ignorance, will not\\ndiscover him.\\nOne should not argue a point when it is\\npossible to avoid it, but when he does argue\\nhe should do so in a gentlemanly and dis-\\npassionate manner.\\nOne should never notice any mistakes in\\nthe language of others.\\nCHAPERONAGE. j\\nThe foreign custom that makes a chape-\\nrone indispensable where young people are\\ngathered together at places of public enter-\\ntainment, has long obtained in the cities of\\nthe East, and in all conventional com-", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0068.jp2"}, "69": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 61\\nmunities everywhere. No really fashionable\\nparty is made up without a chaperone.\\nA young woman condemns herself in the\\neyes of good society who is observed to\\nenter alone with a young man a place of\\npublic refreshment, be the restaurant or tea\\nroom ever so select. Bred under other con-\\nditions of a society so necessarily varying as\\nthat in our broad America, a stranger visit-\\ning New York, for instance, might readily\\nand innocently make a mistake of this\\nnature, and blush at finding herself con-\\ndemned for it. In the same category of\\noffenses is ranked that of maidens visiting\\nplaces of public amusement under the escort\\nof young men alone. Many parts of the\\nSouth and West allow this to be done with\\nthe smiling consent of good society; but in\\nEastern cities it is considered a violation of\\ngood form, and for the comfort, if not the\\nconvenience, of the girl considering it, had\\nbetter be ranked among the lost privileges\\nupon which social evolution may look back\\nwith fond regret.\\nIt is always wisest, when a number of\\nyoung people are to have a party, to ask two\\nor three married women to be present, not\\nonly for propriety s sake, but because there\\nwill then be no danger of any thing unwished\\nfor happening, inasmuch as it is the duty of\\nthe chaperones to make all social entertain-\\nments smooth and pleasant.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0069.jp2"}, "70": {"fulltext": "62 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nWhen it is necessary for a girl to pay long\\nvisits to a dentist s office, she should be\\naccompanied either by her mother, or some\\nwoman relative, or maid.\\nThe etiquette of chaperonage is much less\\nstrict for a young widow than for an un-\\nmarried girl of the same age; but it is im-\\nportant and in good taste for a woman who\\nis a widow to be very quiet and incon-\\nspicuous in all she does, giving by her be-\\nhavior no opportunity for criticism.\\nMARRIAGE.\\nA young girl s own safety, as regards her\\npresent and future happiness, demands that\\nshe receive attentions from only the best of\\nyoung men, those of whom her reason\\nwould approve, if the acquaintance should\\nlead to more than acquaintance.\\nParents should carefully watch the young\\nmen who frequent their houses, in order to\\nsee that undesirable intimacies are not\\nformed with their daughters, for friendships\\nand intimacies soon lead to love.\\nMany a girl, feeling convinced that she had\\nloved unwisely, has entered upon the mar-\\nried state with heart and reason at variance,\\nwhen she might have given up the acquain-\\ntance, in the beginning of it, very easily.\\nThe most perfect reserve in courtship,\\neven in cases of the most ardent attachment,", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0070.jp2"}, "71": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 63\\nis indispensable to the confidence and trust\\nof married life to come.\\nAll public display of devotion should be\\navoided, for it tends to lessen mutual respect,\\nand it makes the actors ridiculous in the\\neyes or others. It is quite possible for a\\nman to show every conceivable attention to\\nthe one to whom he is engaged, and yet to\\navoid committing the slightest offence\\nagainst delicacy or good taste.\\nIt is quite possible for a man to show\\nattention, and even assiduity up to a certain\\npoint, without becoming a lover; and it is\\nequally possible for the girl to let it be seen\\nthat he is not disagreeable to her, without\\nactually encouraging him. No man likes\\nto be refused, and no man of tact will risk\\na refusal.\\nLong engagements are usually entered\\ninto by people who are quite young, but\\nwho, for some reason, cannot marry. As\\nthe years go on their tastes may change,\\nand yet each may feel that honor binds the\\none to the other. The woman chosen by a\\nman when he is twenty-one is seldom the\\nwoman he would chose when he is forty.\\nWhen people marry young they grow\\naccustomed to each other, and, oddly\\nenough, they grow to be alike; but during\\na long engagement their tastes are apt to\\nchange, and the result is apt to be anything", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0071.jp2"}, "72": {"fulltext": "64 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nbut a happy one. Of course, there are ex-\\nceptions, but, generalizing, the long\\nengagement is to be feared.\\nDOMESTIC ETIQUETTE AND DUTIES.\\nEtiquette is a comprehensive term, and its\\nobservances are nowhere more to be desired\\nthan in the domestic circle.\\nIf husbands and wives, generally, would\\nrender each other half of the little attentions\\nthey lavished upon each other before mar-\\nriage, their mutual happiness would be\\nmore than doubled.\\nA wife should never let her husband have\\ncause to complain that she is more agreeable\\nabroad than; at home, nor see her negligent of\\ndress and manners at home when it is the\\nreverse in company.\\nIf, unhappily, any misunderstandings or\\nannoyances occur between husband and\\nwife, it is ill-bred and unjust for either to\\nrepeat them to a third person.\\nFaithful unto death in all things should\\nbe the motto of both husband and wife; and\\nforbearance with each other s peculiarities,\\ntheir never-ending effort to attain.\\nIf a girl discovers very soon after her\\nmarriage that she has made a mistake, it is\\nwisest for her to make the best of it; she\\nshould look for all that is good in her hus-\\nband and try to forget that which she dis-", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0072.jp2"}, "73": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 65\\nlikes. There are times when a legal sepa-\\nration is necessary, but when people marry\\nthey marry for better or for worse, and if,\\nunfortunately, it should be for worse, even\\nthat does not release them from the solemn\\nvows which they have taken.\\nIt is not in good taste for a husband and\\nwife to call each other by endearing names\\nin the presence of others.\\nA man has no right whatever to open his\\nwife s mail, but a woman should not receive\\nany letters that she would not be willing\\nthat her husband should see.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0073.jp2"}, "74": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER V.\\nDress, Gloves, Street Etiquette,\\nTraveling, Bicycling, Tele-\\nphoning.\\nRefinement of character is said never to\\nbe found with vulgarity of dress.\\nDRESS.\\nIn appropriateness our people have some-\\nthing to learn, as has the whole world, for\\nthat matter. Necklaces and jewels in the\\nmorning are monstrous, no matter what the\\nfashion of the moment may be, and there\\nwill come a time when every one will look\\nupon them with horror, as every one, in-\\ndeed, used to do.\\nThe day is past when latitude or great\\nvariety in dress is considered original.\\nClothes, if they are startling at all, must be\\nstartling in a degree to be borne. A train\\ncannot be worn where only a short skirt is\\nin order, nor can an abbreviated drapery go\\nwhere full dress is required. A garden\\nparty, for instance, or an out-of-door tea at\\na private house demands a muslin, a silk,\\nor, at any rate, an elaborate toilet, while at\\na golf club, such dress is absurd, except for\\nthe elderly or non-players. In winter, frills\\n66", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0074.jp2"}, "75": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 67\\nand furbelows, if they are worn at all, are\\nworn at large teas, trie plain tailor-made\\nsuit having gone out for such purposes.\\nHowever, it is difficult to follow the vaga-\\nries of fashion in these regards.\\nFor morning wear, no dress can be too\\nsimple. L,uncheons are growing more and\\nmore informal. When distances are great,\\nhowever, and one dresses for calls in the\\npart of town where the luncheon is, after-\\nward, more elaborateness of dress is al-\\nlowed.\\nThe best advice to all girls upon the sub-\\nject must be, not to be overdressed, nor yet\\nto be careless in the matter. They should\\nattire themselves according to their circum-\\nstances, and should, above all things, avoid\\nall extremes of fashion as well as all eccen-\\ntricities of style.\\nOnly quiet colors should be worn either\\nto church or on the street, and wherever\\ngirls go they should endeavor to be uncon-\\nscious of their personal appearance.\\nThe woman who is overdressed at an\\nafternoon reception is much more uncom-\\nfortable than she who is gowned with the\\nsimplicity of a Quaker. A well fitting wool\\ngown, a becoming bonnet, a fresh pair of\\ngloves, and one is suitably dressed as a\\ncaller.\\nA girl of fourteen should not wear her", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0075.jp2"}, "76": {"fulltext": "68 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nhair done up, and her gown should come\\njust below her ankles.\\nIt is not in good taste for a young girl to\\nwear diamond rings; if she is fortunate\\nenough to possess them, let her keep them\\ncarefully until she is older, and then she\\nmay wear them with perfect propriety.\\nIt is in very bad taste to wear a dressing-\\nsacque when breakfasting in a public din-\\ning-room of a hotel. Such an undress\\ncostume is only permissible in one s own\\nroom.\\nA frock coat is, under no circumstances,\\na correct garment for a man to wear at an\\nevening dance, neither is a Tuxedo or din-\\nner coat. The proper dress is a full dress\\nsuit, with white vest and white string tie.\\nPossibly a dinner coat might be allowable\\nat a very small and very informal dance,\\nbut a frock coat never.\\nA man should wear a white tie with a\\ndress suit at any large formal entertainment,\\nsuch as a ball, the opera, a wedding reception,\\na large dinner party, etc. and on all occasions\\nwhere he wears a white waistcoat. He should\\nwear a black tie at the theater, at a small\\ndinner, in calling, and at home with his\\ndinner coat.\\nEvening dress may be as gay as one\\nchooses to make it, though extremes are\\nnot desirable.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0076.jp2"}, "77": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 69\\nDresses made a suitable length for walk-\\ning are much more appropriate for the street\\nthan those that are so long that their wearers\\nbecome street cleaners.\\nNeatness in a lady s dress is one of the\\nfirst requisites.\\nTo dress well requires good taste, good\\nsense, and refinement.\\nThe most appropriate and becoming dress\\nis that which so harmonizes with the figure\\nthat the apparel is unobserved.\\nA hostess should be careful not to out-\\ndress her guests.\\nWhen going out one should consider the\\nsort of company she is likely to meet, and\\nshould dress accordingly.\\nThe idea that dress makes the man is\\na very false one, but a man does make, or\\nselect, rather, his dress, and is judged some-\\nwhat in accordance with that selection.\\nAt a five o clock church wedding the\\ngroom, best man, and ushers all dress as\\nnearly as possible alike. The proper cos-\\ntume or suit is a black frock coat, gray\\ntrousers, black or fancy vesting waist coat,\\nwhite tie, glace gloves, patent leather boots,\\nand a tall hat.\\nGLOVES.\\nA young woman should of course wear\\ngloves with a full evening dress to any kind\\nof an evening entertainment.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0077.jp2"}, "78": {"fulltext": "70 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nOn taking one s seat at a dinner table of\\na card table one may remove one s gloves,\\nbut not until then; and at the theater or\\nopera, gloves should be worn throughout\\nthe performance and during the evening,\\nA man wears light or white kid gloves to\\nthe opera, dances, a reception, or any other\\nformal evening entertainment, except a\\ndinner.\\nIt is usual to remove one s gloves when\\neating supper at an evening affair, unless\\nmerely a cup of bouillon or an ice may be\\nchosen, and then there would be no impro-\\npriety in keeping on one s gloves.\\nA man wears gloves when calling, and\\nremoves them just before or just after en-\\ntering the parlor. Tan gloves may be worn\\nat all hours of the day; white or pearl\\nones are proper in the evening, when calling,\\nor at any place of amusement.\\nNo matter how long one s gloves are, they\\nshould be entirely taken off at supper, and\\nbe resumed again upon returning to the\\ndrawing-room or after using the finger\\nbowls, and before arising from the feast.\\nTo wear gloves while playing cards is an\\naffectation of elegance.\\nSTREET ETIQUETTE.\\nA man offers his right arm, if either, to a\\nwoman on the street (also in the house),", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0078.jp2"}, "79": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 71\\nthat she may have her right hand free for\\nholding her parasol or guiding her train.\\nBoth common sense and gallantry assign the\\nwoman s place where it is for her greatest\\nconvenience, and that is, undeniably, on the\\nright of the man.\\nThe rule for giving the left arm was\\nheld good in those days when it was neces-\\nsary for men to pass, to the left, thus keep-\\ning the sword-arm free for self -protection or\\nfor the protection of the women, but now\\nthe passing is all to the right.\\nIn walking with a woman a man chooses\\nthe outer side without any regard as to its\\nbeing either the right or the left. In walk-\\ning with two women he chooses the outer\\nside also, and never walks between them.\\nA man walking with a woman returns a\\nbow made to her, lifting his hat, although\\nthe one bowing is a stranger to him.\\nLadies do not talk or call across the street.\\nMen should not smoke when driving or\\nwalking with women, nor on promenades\\nmuch frequented, where they cannot remove\\nthe cigar from the mouth whenever meeting\\na woman.\\nOne should never stare at another.\\nA man when meeting a woman who is\\nwalking and with whom he wishes to con-\\nverse, does not allow her to stand while\\ntalking, but turns and walks with her.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0079.jp2"}, "80": {"fulltext": "72 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nA man cannot refuse to return the bow of\\nany respectable woman. If he does not\\nwish to recognize her he must avoid her.\\nIt is much less rude for women to return\\na recognition coldly, and upon the next\\noccasion to turn away or to avoid a meeting,\\nthan to give a cut direct.\\nA man precedes a woman in passing\\nthrough a crowd; but women precede men\\nunder ordinary circumstances.\\nIt is not proper for a young girl to walk\\nalone with a young man after dark, unless\\nshe is engaged to him or he is a near relative\\nof hers. A young woman should meet a\\nyoung man with whom she has only a slight\\nacquaintance under her father s or a proper\\nguardian s roof. When he has become well\\nacquainted with her and her family or\\nfriends, she may take occasional walks with\\nhim alone in the afternoon, but never in the\\nevening.\\nWhen two women meet in a door-way,\\nthe younger gives precedence to the elder.\\nA man does not first offer to shake hands\\nwith a woman unless he is very well\\nacquainted with her.\\nWhen it becomes necessary for one to\\naddress a man or woman whose name one\\ndoes not know, it should be as Sir or\\nMadam.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0080.jp2"}, "81": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 73\\nIt is very bad taste for young women to\\neat candy during a theatrical performance,\\nor, indeed, in any public place.\\nTRAVELING.\\nOne can travel all over the United States\\nalone, and if she conducts herself quietly,\\nand as a lady should, she will receive all\\ndue respect. At the same time it is perhaps\\na little wiser to have a friend with one, or\\neven, if that is not possible, to be put in\\nthe care of some one who is making the same\\njourney.\\nWhen a young woman is traveling alone\\nand is obliged to stay at a hotel, she is\\nshown to a reception room and sends for a\\nclerk to come to her. After the business\\narrangements are made, she either gives\\nhim a card or tells him her name, and he\\nregisters for her. There is no reason why\\nshe should go into a public room or register\\nherself.\\nIt is not customary, unless one is with-\\nout luggage, to pay in advance at a hotel.\\nFees are usually given on leaving the\\nsteamer to the steward or stewardess, deck\\nsteward, head waiter, waiter of the particu-\\nlar table at which one has taken his meals,\\nand any other servants who have made\\nthemselves useful to him during the voyage.\\nThe amount of the fees depends on the", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0081.jp2"}, "82": {"fulltext": "74 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\namount of the service that has been re-\\nquired, varying from $1 to $5 for each.\\nLiving in lodgings abroad is much cheaper\\nthan living in hotels, and in most of the\\nlarge cities such accommodations may be\\nhad at reasonable rates, and are very com-\\nfortable. The prices for lodging vary ac-\\ncording to location, etc. A steamer trunk\\nshould suffice for a traveler who makes\\na short trip abroad and intends to spend\\nall his time traveling and sight-seeing.\\nMoney for a short trip can be carried\\non the person, in a belt, or a pocket\\nhung about the neck. For a trip of some\\nlength a letter of credit is more convenient,\\nand can be obtained from any banking-house\\nhaving foreign connections. In some\\ncountries traveling in the second-class car-\\nriages is very comfortable; in others it is\\nnot. In Italy a traveler can be comfortable\\nonly by traveling first-class; in France\\nsecond-class is not bad; and in Germany\\nand Great Britian it is perfectly comfor-\\ntable, and preferable to first-class in many\\nrespects.\\nA rush and scramble at a railway ticket\\noffice is only carried on by ill-bred peo-\\nple, or by those who appear so at the time.\\nIf a woman offers to seat herself beside\\na man, he should rise at once and give her\\nthe choice of seats.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0082.jp2"}, "83": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 75\\nNo real gentlemen would be unmindful\\nof the comfort and convenience of women,\\nwhile traveling, from a selfish motive.\\nIn the cars one has no right to keep a\\nwindow open, if the current of air thus\\nproduced annoys another.\\nA woman should always be careful to\\nthank a person for any little attention he\\nmay bestow upon her while traveling.\\nBICYCLING.\\nAs to rules of politeness for bicyclers, one\\nwho is a true lady will show herself to be\\none as surely when riding a wheel as at any\\nother time, not only by her costume, which\\nwill be unobtrusive in color, cut, and adjust-\\nment, but by her manner, which will be\\neven more quiet and self-possessed than\\nusual, as she well knows that by mounting\\na wheel she makes herself more or less con-\\nspicuous. It goes without saying that she\\nwill not ride fast enough to attract undue\\nattention; that she will not chew gum; and\\nthat she will not allow advances from strang-\\ners, who may, like herself, be on a wheel,\\nand, to all appearances, may be gentlemen.\\nNeither will she ride off alone after dark,\\nnor take long rides in the evening attended\\nonly by an escort. In the daytime, when\\nout only with a man friend, she will avoid\\nstopping to rest under the trees and in out of", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0083.jp2"}, "84": {"fulltext": "76 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nthe way places. Too much care cannot be\\ntaken, especially by young girls, as to ap-\\npearances. Their very innocence and ignor-\\nance lays them open to criticism.\\nTELEPHONING. j\\nFor the benefit of those who but seldom\\nmake use of the telephone, and consequently\\nfeel more or less ill at ease when attempting\\nto use one, and also for those who, from ignor-\\nance of the first laws of politeness, or who,\\nfrom thoughtlessness, ignore them, a few\\nhints upon the subject may not come amiss.\\nIt is after having called up Central, and\\nbeen given the number requested, that one\\noften stands in need of no small amount of tact\\nand good breeding, as well as of some idea of\\nthe best method of procedure. When there\\nare several different persons using the same\\nline, two or three of them may mistake the\\ncall for theirs, and all rush to the telephone\\nat once. If at all stupid, or lacking in\\npoliteness, they will make it quite unpleas-\\nant for each other. The one entitled to\\nspeak should politely inquire for the one\\nfor whom she has called at the telephone,\\nalso giving her own name as the one deliver-\\ning the message. If this does not suffice\\nto enlighten those who sometimes keep\\ncalling hello, hello, without waiting\\nto learn if they are the ones desired, the\\none talking should again announce her-", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0084.jp2"}, "85": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 77\\nself, and the name of the one to whom she\\nwishes to speak. Then, occasionally, even\\nwhile in the midst of a conversation,\\nsome one will break in with a* Hello!\\nWho is it? What do you want? etc.,\\nwhich is quite distracting. If one can gain\\na hearing in no other way, it is well to say:\\n1 Excuse me, I hold the line. If this does\\nnot bring order out of chaos, one should\\nring off and call again.\\nOne should be careful not to call up\\nfriends at inconvenient hours, and when one\\nis notified by a servant, or otherwise, that\\nsomeone, the name being given, is at the\\ntelephone wishing to speak with her, she\\nshould certainly be as expeditious as possi-\\nble in replying; for, by holding the wire,\\nshe is inconveniencing others, as well as the\\none who is waiting for her. No lady needs\\nto be warned against speaking discourte-\\nously under any circumstances to the tele-\\nphone assistants at the central office. It is\\nin these little things that one shows herself\\nto be well-bred or not.\\nNone, of course, but the most informal of\\ninvitations can be delivered by telephone.\\nServants should be taught always to answer\\nthe telephone politely and intelligently.\\nWhen answering, a servant should say\\nwhose residence it is, if asked, not by giv-\\ning the family name, as Smith, but as", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0085.jp2"}, "86": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nMr. Smith, and then, if asked who is at\\nthe instrument, she should reply, Mrs.\\nSmith s cook or maid.\\nOne s individual manners, and ordinary\\npolite or impolite forms of address, are very\\nnoticeable when accentuated by the tele-\\nphone.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0086.jp2"}, "87": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER VI.\\nThe Table and Service at Table,\\nHabits at Table, Servants\\nand Serving. i\\nGod may forgive sins, but awkwardness\\nhas no forgiveness in Heaven or earth.\\nHawthorne.\\nTHE TABLE AND SERVICE AT TABLE.\\nThe table looks best when not over-deco-\\nrated. The housekeeper who cannot make\\nchanges in her table decoration finds that a\\nmirror centerpiece is a background that\\nmultiplies the beauty of her flowers, fruit,\\nleaves, or whatever may constitute the\\ndecoration.\\nA unique and effective decoration for a\\nluncheon table is made of long, narrow bou-\\nquets of white carnations, tied with bows of\\nyellow satin ribbon, and arranged so that\\nthe ribbons all meet in the center of the\\ntable, while the points are directed towards\\nthe guests. The effect is of a great golden-\\nhearted daisy.\\nA pretty conceit for decorating a dainty\\ntable is to cluster a number of small palms to-\\ngether in the center of the table. Around\\nthese place small ferns, while beyond the", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0087.jp2"}, "88": {"fulltext": "80 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nlatter arrange yards of smilax so as to con-\\nceal the pots. Outside of all have a flat\\nborder composed of loose bunches of pinks,\\nroses, and maiden-hair ferns. Tie these with\\nwide pink satin ribbons, a long end of which\\nshould extend from each bouquet down to\\nthe place of each of the women guests, and\\nhave her name painted in gold upon it.\\nThen there should be boutonnieres of pink\\ncarnations for the men.\\nMenu cards are not ordinarily used at any\\nbut the most formal kind of an entertain-\\nment. They are always seen at large func-\\ntions, men s public dinners, etc., which are\\nusually given in a hotel or restaurant; but\\nin a private house individual menu cards,\\nwhether at a dinner or a luncheon, are ex-\\nceptional.\\nWhen the dinner is large and formal, or\\neven when it numbers only eight or ten, it\\nis wise to have small cards with the names\\nof the guests at each place at the table,\\nand, if the guests are strangers to each\\nother, to have a tray in the men s dressing-\\nroom or hall where they remove their coats\\nand hats with tiny envelopes addressed to\\neach, containing little cards on which is\\nwritten the name of the dinner partner. The\\nhostess must see that, as soon as two dinner\\npartners are in the receiving room before\\ndinner, they meet each other, and have a", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0088.jp2"}, "89": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 81\\nchance for a little conversation before the\\nmeal is announced; and she should also\\nmake a point to introduce each woman be-\\nfore dinner to the man who is to sit on the\\nother side of her.\\nIntroductions are not proper at the table,\\nand at a large dinner it is awkward to in-\\ntroduce all one s guests to each other before\\nthe meal. At a small dinner, of course, it\\nis not necessary to observe all this formality,\\nand the hostess may introduce her guests\\nto each other without much ceremony, when\\nthe company numbers only four or six; but\\nwith more, each woman should be provided\\nwith a partner who escorts her to the table.\\nAt a small function there need be but a\\nfew minutes of waiting before the guests\\nare all seated. The guest of honor sits at the\\nright of the host.\\nAs to the manner of arranging the table,\\nthere is some difference of opinion. How-\\never, generally speaking, there should be a\\nnapkin, squarely folded, in front of each\\nguest, and at the left of it the forks, e.\\na fish fork and a large and a small ordinary\\nfork. At the right of the napkin should be\\nthe knives and spoons, a glass, bread-and-\\nbutter plate (if used), and a salt cellar; and\\nin the center of the table on an embroidered\\ncenterpiece or circular mirror, the floral\\ndecorations. At the head of the table, upon", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0089.jp2"}, "90": {"fulltext": "82 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nan embroidered square, are laid the tea ser-\\nvice, the urn, the cups and saucers, the\\ncream pitcher, sugar bowl, etc.; at the other\\nend are placed the dishes for serving. Scat-\\ntered about on circular doilies are the dishes\\nof jelly, preserves, pickles (sweet and sour),\\nolives, salted almonds, etc.\\nChafing-dishes are used to prepare such\\ndishes as terrapin, oysters, or whatever may\\nbe cooked absolutely on the table. A nap-\\nkin and plate, or tray, is best liked for\\nremoving crumbs.\\nFinger bowls should always follow the\\nlast course at formal and informal meals\\nalike, except at breakfast, when, if fruit is\\nthe first course, the finger-bowl is put on\\nthe table when the covers are laid ready for\\nthe fruit course.\\nSpoon-holders are no longer used, but if\\none should be fancied it would be better to\\nput the bowl of the spoon in the holder first.\\nUnless one serves something more than\\nwafers, small cakes, tea, and chocolate on\\nan at home day, napkins are not neces-\\nsary; if, however, there is some dish that\\nwill soil the fingers or the lips, then there\\nshould be a pile of small napkins on the tea-\\ntable.\\nTooth-picks should not be put on the\\ntable, nor should they be used outside one s\\nown room.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0090.jp2"}, "91": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 83\\nIt is not necessary to fold one s napkin\\nwhen only one meal is to be eaten in the\\nhouse in which one is staying.\\nThe day for tying cakes, sandwiches, etc.,\\nwith ribbons has passed.\\nThe waitress should stand with a tray in\\nher hand behind the host s chair to receive\\neach plate as it is filled, passing it to the\\nleft of the guest, and waiting for him to re-\\nmove it. When the hostess is pouring tea\\nor coffee, the maid s place is by her\\nleft side in wating for the cups. After\\nthat she should be on the alert to see when\\nthe glasses need filling, or when there is\\nbread, pickles, or anything to be passed.\\nWhen removing the plates it should be from\\nthe right side of the guest, but everything\\nshould be offered at the left that the right\\nhand may be used to receive it.\\nWhen a dish is passed and there is no\\nmaid in attendance, one should help him-\\nself and pass it on. If a dish is standing\\nnear one, under such circumstances, he may\\nquite properly ask if he may help himself,\\nand do so.\\nWhen a plate is passed for a helping, the\\nknife and fork are laid well to the side of\\nthe plate, so placed that they will not fall\\noff, and yet not be in the way of the server.\\nAll the appurtenances of each course\\nshould be removed before the succeeding", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0091.jp2"}, "92": {"fulltext": "84 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\none is served. The bread-and-butter plates,\\nhowever, should be removed before the salad\\ncourse, as crackers and cheese are passed\\nwith this, the salad plate being used to hold\\nall three things.\\nThe salted almonds should be started\\nabout the table by the hostess soon after the\\nguests are seated. Some hostesses possess\\ncut-glass or china individual dishes, on\\nwhich the almonds are placed when the\\nguest helps himself, but it is quite usual for\\nthem to be placed on the bread-and-butter\\nplate.\\nBonbons should be passed by the maid\\nwhen the coffee is served, and eaten from\\nthe plate from which the finger-bowl and\\ndoily have been removed.\\nIt is not important whether tumblers or\\ngoblets are used on the dinner- table; each\\nseason brings its own custom.\\nThe bread-and-butter plates at a formal\\ndinner serve the purpose only of bread\\nplates, as it is not customary to serve but-\\nter on such occasions. If it is used, how-\\never, butter should be made into tiny balls,\\nand one or two placed on each bread-and-\\nbutter plate.\\nIt is customary to put the vegetables\\nserved with the meat on the same plate.\\nThe use of individual dishes for vegetables\\nis no longer approved.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0092.jp2"}, "93": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 85\\nOranges are seldom served at dinner un-\\nless they are specially prepared, that is,\\nwith the skin taken off, and the sections\\ndivided, in which case the fruit is eaten\\nfrom a fork.\\nCheese and crackers of some sort are al-\\nways served with salad courses.\\nAt a formal dinner bouillon or consomme\\nis usually served in soup-plates. At a sup-\\nper or luncheon it is oftenest served in cups.\\nThe regulation cups are those having han-\\ndles on each side.\\nWhen oysters are served on the half-shell,\\nthey are usually placed upon the table be-\\nfor the meal is announced.\\nIt is not customary to serve fruit as a\\nfirst course at dinner, though at a lunch it\\nis quite proper.\\nGrape-fruit must be served ice cold. It\\nis served in two ways: either it is cut in\\nhalves, midway between the blossom and\\nthe stem end, the seeds removed, the pulp\\nloosened with a sharp knife, but served\\nin the natural skin, to be eaten with a\\nspoon; or the pulp and seeds are entirely\\nremoved from the skin with a sharp knife,\\nand the edible part only served in deep\\ndessert plates. Pulverized sugar should\\naccompany grape-fruit.\\nIn waiting upon plates, one should never", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0093.jp2"}, "94": {"fulltext": "86 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\npour gravy on the food, but place it at one\\nside.\\nThe salad course at dinner always suc-\\nceeds the game course.\\nAfter dinner coffee is served in small\\ncups and without cream. In many houses\\nrock-candy, crushed in very small pieces, is\\nused as a substitute for sugar, the claim\\nbeing made that it gives a purer sweetness.\\nCut sugar is served with coffee, and pow-\\ndered sugar with fruit or oatmeal.\\nCoffee may be served at the table or in\\nthe drawing-room as is best liked. People\\nare not asked if they will have it; it is\\nserved to them. Only sugar is offered with\\nblack coffee.\\nHABITS AT TABLE.\\nNothing indicates the good breeding of a\\nman so much as his manners at table.\\nThere are a thousand little points to be ob-\\nserved, which, although not absolutely\\nnecessary, distinctly stamp the refined and\\nwell-bred man. A man may pass muster by\\ndressing well, and may sustain himself tol-\\nerably in conversation; but, if he is not\\nnearly perfect in table etiquette, dining will\\nbetray him.\\nAny unpleasant peculiarity, abruptness,\\nor coarseness of manner is especially offen-", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0094.jp2"}, "95": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 87\\nsive at table. People are more easily dis-\\ngusted at that time than at any other.\\nOne should never rest the arms upon the\\ntable, but keep the left hand, when not in\\nuse, lying quietly in the lap.\\nA man guest should never precede his\\nhostess into or out of the dining-room, but\\nshould wait respectfully by the door for her\\nto pass.\\nA soup-plate should never be tilted for\\nthe last spoonful.\\nThe mouth should be kept closed in eat-\\ning, and as little noise made as possible.\\nA goblet should be held by the stem, and\\nnot by the bowl.\\nBread should be broken and not cut be-\\nfore buttering it to eat.\\nA knife should never be used at table ex-\\ncept where one is unable to cut his food\\nwith his fork; it should never be used in\\nconveying food to the mouth.\\nA knife should be held by its handle, and\\nthe finger not allowed to extend up on the\\nblade. In eating with a fork it should be\\nheld in the right hand.\\nThe fork is generally used with the tines\\ncurving upward.\\nOlives are eaten from the fingers; pickles,\\nfrom a fork. It is usual to put either a", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0095.jp2"}, "96": {"fulltext": "88 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nsmall fork or a long-handled spoon with a\\nsmall bowl on the dish containing olives\\nor pickles, and one should use it in helping\\none s self.\\nThe tips of the fingers are put in the\\nfinger-bowls and may then moisten the\\nlips. Both lips and finger tips are dried on\\nthe napkin, which is not afterwards folded.\\nWatermelons are eaten with a fork, and\\ncantaloupes with either a spoon or a fork.\\nA baked potato should be eaten from the\\nplate after it has been pushed out of its\\nskin by the fork.\\nDried beef is eaten with a fork.\\nGrape seeds may be removed from the\\nmouth with the fingers. The seeds of\\nwatermelons should be taken from the fruit\\nwith a fork before the fruit is put into the\\nmouth.\\nFish bones are taken from the mouth\\nwith the fingers. Care, however, is usually\\ntaken to leave as few bones as possible in\\nthe fish, since the general use of the silver\\nknife with the silver fork has made it easy\\nto separate the bones from the meat.\\nBananas are broken with a fork, and a\\npiece is conveyed to the mouth on a fork.\\nWhen a servant offers one a dish, he\\nshould help himself without taking it from\\nher hand.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0096.jp2"}, "97": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 89\\nWhen drinking from a cup, the spoon\\nshould be left in the saucer, where it also\\nremains when the cup is empty.\\nIt is not proper to eat gravy with bits of\\nbread; instead, it should be regarded as a\\nsauce, and simply eaten on the meat of\\nwhich it forms a portion.\\nIt is decreed by custom that the small\\nbones of any bird may be taken in the fin-\\ngers, and the meat eaten from the bone.\\nBut this must always be done daintily.\\nWhat is known as layer cake is eaten\\nfrom a fork, and in serving it one uses\\neither a pie- knife or a tablespoon and a\\nfork.\\nCheese is eaten with a fork.\\nAfter-dinner coffee is taken directly from\\nthe cup, and not from the spoon.\\nCrackers should be eaten from the hand,\\nand not be broken into soup.\\nWhen bread is passed, one takes a slice\\nas it is cut, and does not break it and leave\\na portion on the plate. Bread is always\\neaten from the fingers.\\nRaw oysters are eaten with a small\\noyster- fork from the shell. In helping\\none s self to salt, the little salt-spoon is\\nused, and the salt is placed on the plate.\\nWhen strawberries are served with their\\nstems on, one picks one up by the stem,", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0097.jp2"}, "98": {"fulltext": "90 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\ndips it into the soft sugar at the side of the\\nplate, and eats it from the stem. Bonbons\\nare eaten from the fingers. If a spoon is in\\nthe dish from which they are served, then\\none uses it; if not, the fingers are proper.\\nAn apple or a pear may be held on a fork,\\nand pared with a knife; or it may be quar-\\ntered, and each quarter held in the fingers,\\nand then pared. Dates are eaten from the\\nfingers.\\nWhen one answers thank you to an\\ninvitation to partake of a certain dish at the\\ntable, yes is meant.\\nOne should break a small piece of bread\\noff the slice, then butter it and eat it. Only\\nvery small children in the nursery bite from\\na slice of buttered bread.\\nOne need not fear to take the last piece\\non the plate when it is offered. It would\\nbe more impolite to refuse it.\\nIt is very bad form to pile up, or in any\\nway arrange the plates or small dishes put\\nbefore one, for the benefit of the waiter.\\nShe should do her own work, which is to\\ntake away the plates without any help.\\nWhen one wishes for bread, or anything\\nof that sort, he should simply ask for it,\\neither addressing his request to the servant\\nor, if there is none, to whomever the bread\\nmay be nearest, if it is on the table.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0098.jp2"}, "99": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 91\\nUpon leaving the table, and the signal\\nfor leaving is given when the hostess rises,\\none s napkin should be placed upon the\\ntable unfolded, unless one is to remain for\\nanother meal.\\nAt a formal dinner party the host should\\nenter the dining-room first and with the\\nlady in whose honor the dinner is given;\\nthe hostess goes into the dining-room last\\nwith the most important man guest, who\\nshould be seated at her right.\\nWhere menus are used they should be\\nplaced on the left-hand side, beside the\\nforks. When the dinner is over, at a sig-\\nnal from the hostess, the women rise and re-\\ntire to the drawing-room, where coffee is\\nusually served, the men remaining in the\\ndining-room for coffee and cigars.\\nFive o clock tea may be served in a vari-\\nety of ways the hostess may brew it her-\\nself in a teapot upon her tea-table in the\\nparlor; she may make it by pouring boiling\\nwater over a tea- ball; or it may be served\\nby either a man or maid servant in the din-\\ning-room. Its proper accompaniments are\\nsugar, cream, sliced lemon, and either waf-\\ners, thin sandwiches, or cake.\\nIt is in better form to have a luncheon\\nserved at a large table, especially when the\\nguests do not number more than twenty,\\nthan to have small tables. Two o clock is", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0099.jp2"}, "100": {"fulltext": "92 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nthe fashionable hour for a luncheon; after\\nit is over the guests usually disperse.\\nA host, in entertaining at a hotel or a res-\\ntaurant, even if he entertains only one\\nwoman, should, give the order for the meal\\nhimself, and save her the slight embarrass-\\nment it may be for her to make her own\\nselection. The most courteous thing is for\\nhim to order the meal beforehand, but if\\nthe occasion is very informal and he prefers\\nto wait until they are at the table, he\\nshould, after he and his guest are seated,\\nhand the menu to her and ask if she has\\nany especial preference, and then, respect-\\ning her wishes, give the order himself to\\nthe waiter.\\nIf, however, friends happen in, and are\\nasked informally to stay to a meal at a\\nhotel, they may order themselves what they\\nwant from the menu, and, if necessary, the\\nhost or hostess of the occasion may pay the\\nbill before leaving the dining-room, but the\\nbill should not be paid until the guests have\\ndeparted.\\nIn giving one s order for dinner at the\\nhotel, oysters come first, then soup, fish, a\\nroast or a bird, ices, whatever dessert\\nmay be desired, and coffee. Very often a\\nwoman is well served, when she is alone, by\\nallowing the waiter to arrange a dinner for\\nher.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0100.jp2"}, "101": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 93\\nIf the only guest at the family dinner-\\ntable is a man, he should not be served\\nuntil all the ladies of the family have been\\nattended to.\\nIf the hostess is the only woman at the\\ntable, she is served first, as a lady is of\\nmost importance from a social standpoint,\\nand it is always proper to attend to her\\nwants first. After her the man who is a\\nvisitor, or whose age gives him precedence,\\nreceives attention.\\nThe guest of honor at a tea arrives a little\\nearlier than the other guests, and remains\\nsomewhat later, but at a luncheon or dinner\\nshe should appear at the regulation time.\\nOne should remove one s gloves at a lunch-\\neon, but the retaining of the hat is entirely\\na matter of personal taste.\\nThe inconsiderate guest who arrives late\\nfor luncheon or dinner is shown immedi-\\nately into the dining-room, and the hostess\\ndoes not leave her guests, but simply rises\\nand motions him to a seat when he enters\\nthe room.\\nTen minutes is the time usually allowed\\nfor each course where more than a six-\\ncourse dinner is served.\\nThe correct and usual way of seating a\\nbridal party at a wedding entertainment is\\nfor the groom to sit at one end of the table,\\nand the bride at the other end, the best", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0101.jp2"}, "102": {"fulltext": "94 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nman on the bride s right, and the maid of\\nhonor or first bridemaid on the groom s\\nright. The other bridemaids and ushers are\\nplaced wherever seems best. As a usual\\nthing, the parents of the bride and groom\\ndo not sit at the same table with the imme-\\ndiate bridal party, but at another table, to-\\ngether with the near relatives on both sides,\\nand perhaps the minister who officiated at\\nthe wedding and his wife; but if it seems\\ndesirable to have the parents at the bridal\\ntable, it is perfectly proper to seat them\\nthere.\\nThere are certain distinctive features of a\\nbridal table which must be in evidence.\\nOne is the wedding or bride s cake, and this\\ncake should be the central ornament, and\\nshould be surrounded with a wreath of\\nroses. The place-cards should have the in-\\nitials of the bride and groom woven together\\nfor decoration, and the souvenirs may be\\nsmall satin boxes containing wedding cake.\\nSERVANTS AND SERVING.\\nThere is so much to say upon the subject\\nof servants, notwithstanding so much has al-\\nready been said, it is difficult to know where\\nto begin. But, in the first place, every\\nwoman should remember that servants are,\\nlike herself, human, and that in our free\\nAmerica, they are becoming very indepen-\\ndent, not to say self-assertive. Thus a", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0102.jp2"}, "103": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 95\\nhouse mistress has no small matter to deal\\nwith when she demands obedience and re-\\nspectful attention from girls who are gener-\\nally ignorant, and often impudent and ill-\\nbred. The greatest strength of the mistress\\nlies in her power to control herself, and\\nwhile she must demand respectfulness from\\nher servants, she can often avoid a clash\\nwith them by using a little tact. If they\\nare treated in a kind, though dignified, man-\\nner, unless very degenerate, they will usu-\\nally respond satisfactorily.\\nOne can speak, with perfect propriety, of\\nthe one servant employed as the maid,\\nbut not as our girl.\\nServants should be expected to dress neat-\\nly, and where there is but one, she should\\nhave a clean white apron ready to put on\\nwhen answering the door-bell, being pre-\\npared with a tray to receive the caller s card.\\nShe should also know, before answering the\\nbell, who is in and who is not at home, and\\nwhat excuse, if any, to make for each one\\ncalled for.\\nServants should never be allowed to call\\nany member of the family from a distance,\\nas from the foot of the stairs, but should go\\nto the one to whom she wishes to speak,\\nand deliver her message.\\nIt is hard to say, under all circumstances,\\nwhat to expect of a nursery governess, and", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0103.jp2"}, "104": {"fulltext": "96 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nwhat should be her privileges. To treat\\nher with the greatest consideration is well\\nworth while; for one is compensated in be-\\ning able to get an intellegent, ladylike wo-\\nman who may be trusted to guide her charges\\nwisely. One may ask a governess to sleep\\nin the same room with the children, dress\\nand undress them, eat with them, and teach\\nthem, and take the entire charge of them;\\nbut, of course, one will provide some attrac-\\ntive place for her to sit during the evening,\\nwhile the children are asleep in her room.\\nIt is also necessary to see that her meals are\\nwell cooked and carefully served, and to\\npermit her to be free one afternoon and even-\\ning every week. She should be addressed\\nas Miss Smith, not by her first name.\\nIt is expedient to supervise the work of\\nthe general house- work servant as much as\\npossible; and if it is more convenient for\\nher to go up the front stairs to announce\\ncallers, and to go down them to answer the\\nfront door, certainly allow her to use the\\nfront stairs instead of the back ones on oc-\\ncasions. A waitress or parlor-maid is no\\nmore privileged to use the front stairs than\\na general house- work servant. A nurse\\nmay be, with propriety, wherever her charges\\nare allowed.\\nIf a maid is expected to wear a cap, it is\\nusually furnished by the lady of the house.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0104.jp2"}, "105": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 97\\nIt is good form to address the servants one\\nknows when entering a house, and to thank\\nthem for any attention.\\nIt is unfortunate that the English system\\nof feeing has come into vogue here. But it\\nis quite customary now, for a guest, after a\\nvisit, even a short one, to bestow upon a\\nservant a small fee, say, of a dollar.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0105.jp2"}, "106": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER VII.\\nFunerals, Mourning.\\nCivility implies self-sacrifice; it is the last\\ntouch, the crowning perfection of a noble\\ncharacter. Mathews.\\nFUNERALS.\\nAt no place is a lack of system, and an\\nobservance of formality, more noticable than\\nat a funeral. An undertaker generally has\\ncharge of the details, and where he is well\\ninformed and has sufficient assistance, he\\ncan manage affairs nicely, but there is a\\ngreat deal of unostentatious service that\\nmay be done by friends, indeed, must be.\\nThey can assist the servants in arrang-\\ning the house, flowers, etc. before the fu-\\nneral; meet any who may call at the door;\\nand in every way stand between the afflict-\\ned family and the outside world. Of course\\nnone but intimate friends can be of service\\nat such a time. All others, no matter how\\nwilling, can but call at the door with offers\\nof service, and even that should not be car-\\nried far enough to appear intrusive.\\nAt a house funeral the family remains up-\\nstairs, or in a side room, and is not seen.\\nThe remains are in the drawing-room, where\\nthey are usually viewed by those present\\n98", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0106.jp2"}, "107": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 99\\nwhen passing out. The clergyman stands\\nnear the head of the casket, if in so doing\\nhis voice can be well heard. If there is sing-\\ning, it is usually done by a quartet or by a\\nsmaller number of persons, who are seated at\\nthe head of the stairs out of sight and un-\\naccompanied by any musical instrument.\\nThose who are not going to the cemetery\\nquietly disperse at the close of the service.\\nCarriages are in waiting for the family, and\\nthe cortege moves as soon after the close of\\nthe service as possible.\\nIn the meantime the nurse (if one still\\nremains at the house), or some friend, with\\nthe assistance of the servants, makes every-\\nthing look as natural and pleasant as possible\\nbefore the return of the family. If visitors\\ncome in later, of course it depends upon\\ncircumstances whether or not they should\\nbe admitted.\\nChurch funerals are more formal. The\\ncongregation assembles, and when the\\ncarriages containing the family arrive, the\\norgan plays softly, and the procession enters,\\nthe relatives walking close to the casket,\\nand sitting as near it as possible. After\\nthe services the procession moves out in the\\nsame order, and the people in the pews wait\\nuntil is has passed on.\\nThe crepe that is hung at the door-bell\\nhas often combined with it ribbon streamers,", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0107.jp2"}, "108": {"fulltext": "100 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nthose for the aged being black, for a\\nyounger person purple, and for a child\\nwhite with white cr\u00c2\u00a3pe also. Flowers\\nshould be sent to the bereaved, in due time\\nafter the death, in token of sympathy.\\nMOURNING.\\nThe putting on of mourning is a question\\nthat should be decided entirely by those\\nmost deeply concerned. Many families\\nnever follow the custom, and even wear\\nwhite instead of black on the day of the\\nfuneral, while others seem to consider the\\nwearing of crepe as a mark of respect shown\\nto the dead. To assume the expense such\\na change in clothing would entail, may\\nsometimes be placing a burden upon the\\nliving for the sake of the dead, which cer-\\ntainly neither custom nor reason should de-\\nmand. Then, to many, the wearing of\\ncrepe is so depressing that it is a sin against\\none s self to put it on. None but narrow-\\nminded, uncultivated persons would ever\\nthink of criticising one for not doing so.\\nOf couse one would naturally feel like dress-\\ning in as subdued colors as possible, if\\nnot in assuming half mourning (black and\\nwhite, lavendar, drab, etc.) if not deep\\nblack or crepe.\\nWhen mourning is worn by a wife for a\\nhusband, it is worn from one to two years,\\nat least.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0108.jp2"}, "109": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 101\\nThe question of wearing mourning for\\none s betrothed must be decided by one s\\nself, for it is purely a personal question that\\nthe laws of etiquette do not govern.\\nWhen crepe is laid aside, black-bordered\\npaper and black-bordered cards are no longer\\nproper. While wearing all black on the\\nstreet, after crepe is laid aside, one may\\nwear, with propriety, all white in the house.\\nWhile in deep mourning one does not go\\ninto society. All that mourning etiquette\\ndemands is that one acknowledge her calls\\nwith her visiting cards, which should be\\nsent in return for a call within two weeks\\nafter it is made, and should go by hand\\nrather than by mail.\\nOne sends invitations to one s friends who\\nare in mourning, to show that they are not\\nforgotten.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0109.jp2"}, "110": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER VIII.\\nPoliteness of Young Children.\\nGive a boy address and accomplishments,\\nand you give him the mastery of palaces and\\nfortunes wherever he goes. Ralph Waldo\\nEmerson.\\nA mother once asked a clergyman when\\nshe should begin to educate her child, then\\nthree years old. Madam/ was his reply,\\nyou have lost three years already.\\nAs soon as the child can talk, its lessons\\nin politeness should begin. Among a child s\\nfirst words should be please and thank\\nyou.\\nA child should never be allowed to leave\\nthe table, after it is old enough to under-\\nstand and to say it, without asking to be\\nexcused.\\nA child should be taught to pass behind\\nand not before one.\\nLittle boys should never be allowed to\\nkeep their hats on in the house.\\nChildren, when very young, should be\\ntaught to be generous and polite to their\\nlittle visitors, and, if necessary, to give up\\nall of anything where half will not do.\\nChildren should be taught to take turns\\nin playing games, and that no one should\\nmonopolize the pleasantest part of a game.\\n102", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0110.jp2"}, "111": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 103\\nChildren soon feel a pride in being little\\nladies and gentlemen, rather than in being\\nrude and impolite.\\nIf mothers would impress upon their chil-\\ndren s minds how stupid they appear when\\nthey stand staring at one without answering\\nwhen addressed with good morning or a\\nlike salutation, they would be anxious to\\nknow what to say, and to say it.\\nChildren do not always know what to an-\\nswer when addressed. They ought to be\\ntaught, so that they may feel no embarrass-\\nment.\\nWhen children inconvenience others, they\\nought to be taught to say excuse me or\\nbeg pardon.\\nIn the cars, or in any c public place, a boy\\nor a girl should always rise, and give his or\\nher place to an older person.\\nA child should always learn that it is both\\nnaughty and rude to contradict, and to say\\nwhat for and why, when told to do\\nanything.\\nA mother who is as careful of her child s\\nmoral nature and manners as of his physi-\\ncal nature, will guard him from naughty\\nand rude playmates as closely as she would\\nfrom measles or whooping-cough.\\nA mother should never allow any disre-\\nspect in her children s manners toward her-", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0111.jp2"}, "112": {"fulltext": "io4 Practical etiquette.\\nself, nor toward any one older than they\\nare. They should be taught especially to\\nreverence the aged.\\nHabits of politeness and kindness to the\\npoor are of great worth, and easily formed\\nin childhood.\\nVirtue is born of good habits, and the\\nformation of habits may be said to consti-\\ntute almost the whole work of education.\\nHabits have been compared to handcuffs,\\neasily put on and difficult to rid one s\\nself of.\\nThose parents who regulate their lives in\\naccordance with the commands of the Bible,\\nfind many verses which are of great assist-\\nance in teaching politeness to young chil-\\ndren, such as, Be ye courteous one to an-\\nother, Be respectful to your elder, Do\\nto other as ye would that they should do to\\nyou, etc.\\nA child should be thoroughly trained\\nwith regard to table manners. The well-\\nbred child will not chew his food with his\\nmouth half open, talk with it in his mouth, nor\\nmake any unnecessary noises in eating; and\\nhe will handle his knife and fork properly.\\nChildren should be taught that it is very\\nrude to look into drawers or boxes, or, in\\nfact, to meddle with or handle anything\\naway from home that is not intended for\\nthem to play with.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0112.jp2"}, "113": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 105\\nChildren should be made to understand\\nthat they must not ask too many questions\\npromiscuously, such as, Where are you\\ngoing? What have you there? etc.\\nA child should be taught never to tease\\na playmate s mother, or to have its own\\nmother teased by a playmate. Teasing\\nshould not be allowed.\\nChildren should never be allowed to say\\nI won t and I will, even to each\\nother.\\nChildren should never be allowed to speak\\nof an elder person by the last name without\\nthe proper prefix. They should also be\\ntaught, in addressing boys and girls, say,\\nsixteen years of age, to use the prefix, as\\nMiss or Mr., before the given name;\\nthus Miss Alice or Mr. George. In\\nfact, all people should observe this rule in\\naddressing the young, except in case the\\nolder person is very familiar with the\\nyounger, or in case the latter is too young\\nto be so addressed.\\nChildren are now taught to say, Yes,\\nmamma, What, mamma? Thank you,\\nmamma, Yes, Mrs. Allen, What,\\nMrs. Allen? etc., in preference to Yes,\\nma am, No, ma am, etc.\\nChildren should be taught that it is rude\\nto yawn without trying to suppress it, or", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0113.jp2"}, "114": {"fulltext": "106 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nwithout concealing the mouth with the hand;\\nto whistle or hum in the presence of older\\npersons; or to make any monotonous noise\\nwith feet or hands, beating time, etc.; to\\nplay with napkin rings, or any article at\\ntable during meal time; to pick the teeth\\nwith the fingers; to trim or clean one s nails\\noutside one s room; to lounge anywhere in\\nthe presence of company to place the el-\\nbows on the table, or to lean upon it while\\neating; to speak of absent persons by their\\nfirst names, when they would not so address\\nthem if they were present; to acquire the\\nhabit of saying you know, says he,\\nsays she; to use slang words; to tattle; to\\nhide the mouth with the hand when speak-\\ning; to point at anyone or anything with\\nthe finger; to stare at persons; to laugh at\\none s own stories or remarks; to toss\\narticles instead of handing them; to\\nleave the table with food in the mouth; to\\ntake possession of a seat that belongs to\\nanother without instantly rising upon his\\nreturn; to leave anyone without saying\\ngood-by; to interrupt any one in conver-\\nsation; to push; to ridicule others; to pass,\\nwithout speaking, any one whom they know;\\netc.\\nSome young people are not as particular\\nas they should be about certain articles of\\nthe toilet, such as combs, brushes, etc. One\\nshould always have such things for his own", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0114.jp2"}, "115": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 107\\nindividual use. It is exceedingly impolite\\nto use any toilet article belonging to another.\\nIt is ill-mannered to ask questions about\\naffairs that do not concern one, or to pry\\ninto the private affairs of one s friends. To\\ninquire the cost of articles indiscriminately,\\nis impudent.\\nIf parents are not at home when visitors\\ncome in, or are too busy to see them at once,\\na child, in the absence of a maid, should\\npolitely show them in, offer them a com-\\nfortable chair, show them anything he\\nthinks they will be interested in, and make\\nevery effort to entertain them agreeably\\nuntil such time as his parents can take his\\nplace. He should then politely withdraw\\nfrom the room.\\nChildren and young people should early\\nlearn not to monopolize the best light or\\nthe most desirable seat in the room, but to\\nlook about when anyone enters, whether a\\nguest or an older member of their own fam-\\nily, and see if by giving up their own place\\nthe new-comer may be made more comfor-\\ntable.\\nA boy ought to show to his mother and\\nsisters every attention he would show to any\\nother woman. Should they chance to meet\\non the street he should politely raise his\\nhat. He should allow them to pass first\\nthrough a door, give them the inside of the", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0115.jp2"}, "116": {"fulltext": "108 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nwalk, help them into a carriage, and every-\\nwhere and under all circumstances treat\\nthem with politeness and deference. Girls\\nshould of course treat their brothers in the\\nsame polite manner; for they can hardly\\nexpect to receive attentions where they are\\nunwilling to bestow them.\\nChildren, especially little boys, should be\\ntaught not to precede their mothers, or any\\nwoman, into theaters, street cars, churches,\\nelevators, or into the house or even a room.\\nSCHOOL-ROOM ETIQUETTE.\\nGood manners are the shadows of virtues, if not virtues\\nthemselves.\\nIf teachers realized the inestimable\\namount of good they might accomplish by\\ngiving a little time and thought to the\\nmanners of their pupils, surely they would\\nwillingly give it. Those of their pupils\\nwho have no proper training at home would\\nthus gain a knowledge which, in after life,\\nwould prove a blessing. And such a course\\nacted upon by the teacher would be of\\ngreat assistance to the parents of those who\\nare well trained at home; for a large portion\\nof a child s time is spent in school, and\\nunder conditions that require such training.\\nTeachers must treat their scholars po-\\nlitely if they expect polite treatment from\\nthem.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0116.jp2"}, "117": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 109\\nEvery teacher should see that no pupil is\\nallowed to treat those of a lower station in\\nlife with disrespect.\\nIt is a common occurrence for a teacher\\nto speak with seeming disrespect of a\\npupil s parents, blaming them for the\\npupil s lack of interest in school, truancy,\\netc. Such a course is highly reprehensible\\nin the teacher, and gains the pupil s ill-will.\\nIt is better to assume that the parents\\nwould be displeased with anything wrong\\nin the pupil, and to appeal to the pupil for\\nhis mother s or father s sake.\\nA teacher should never allow herself or\\nhimself to be addressed by pupils as Teach-\\ner, but as Miss or Mr. Smith.\\nIf pupils would take pains to bid a teach-\\ner good-morning and good-night, they\\nwould appear well in so doing, and easily\\ngive pleasure to another.\\nThe entire atmosphere of a school-room is\\ndependent upon trifles. Where a teacher, by\\nher own actions and in accordance with her\\nrequirements, insures kindness and polite-\\nness from all to all, she may feel almost sure\\nof the success of her school.\\nYoung misses ought to be addressed by\\nthe teacher as Miss Julia, Miss Annie.\\nYoung boys (too young to be addressed as\\nMr.) should be addressed as Master\\nBrown, Master Jones, etc.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0117.jp2"}, "118": {"fulltext": "110 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nTeachers should use great discretion in\\nreproving any unintentional rudeness, es-\\npecially on the part of those ignorant from\\nlack of home training. If such were re-\\nproved gently and privately, it would be\\nmore efficacious and just. No one should\\nbe allowed to appear to disadvantage from\\nignorance.\\nSelfishness, untruthfulness, slang, rowdy-\\nism, egotism, or any show of superiority\\nshould be corrected in the school-room.\\nYoung teachers hardly realize with what\\nfear and dread mothers intrust to them their\\ncarefully reared children, especially young\\nones.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0118.jp2"}, "119": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER X.\\nOfficial Etiquette.\\nGood fashion rests on realty, and hates\\nnothing so much as pretenders. Emerson.\\nAll presentations to foreign courts are\\nmade through the national representatives,\\nand from them is received all the informa-\\ntion desired in reference to the necessary-\\nforms and ceremonies.\\nKings and queens are addressed as Your\\nMajesty. The Prince of Wales, the crown\\nprinces, and all other princes and princesses\\nare addressed as Your Royal Highness.\\nThe President s levees at Washington\\nare open to all, and are conducted very much\\nas an ordinary reception. As one enters,\\nan official announces him, and he proceeds\\ndirectly to the president and his lady, and\\npays his respects.\\nThe door of the White House may be\\nsaid never to be closed, and any one who\\ndesires may call upon its occupants as upon\\nthose of any other dwelling. He may not,\\nhowever, obtain a personal interview. This,\\nto be secured, he must seek in the company\\nof an official or intimate friend of the presi-\\ndent, who will be able to judge of the claims\\nfor attention of a visitor,\\nin", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0119.jp2"}, "120": {"fulltext": "112 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nNo particular style of dress is required to\\nmake one s appearance at the Republican\\nCourt.\\nNo refreshments are expected to be of-\\nfered at a presidential reception.\\nCustom does not require that the wife of\\nthe president of the United States should re-\\nturn official calls. Exception is made in the\\ncase of visiting Royalty. The wives of the\\nforeign ambassadors should make the first\\ncall upon the wife of the vice-president, as\\nshould the wives of the cabinet officials. At\\na function given by officials of foreign gov-\\nernments at Washington, the wife of the\\nsecretary of state takes precedence over the\\nwives of the foreign ambassadors.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0120.jp2"}, "121": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER XI.\\nBusiness Correspondence, Applica-\\ntions, Etc.\\nSince custom is the principal magistrate\\nof humam life, let men by all means endeavor\\nto obtain good customs.\u00e2\u0080\u0094 Lord Bacon.\\nCORRESPONDENCE.\\nBUSINESS CORRESPONDENCE.\\nClosely written postal cards and long\\nletters meet with little favor among business\\nmen; therefore it is important to make busi-\\nness correspondence as plain and brief as\\npossible.\\nNames of places and persons should be\\nwritten very plainly.\\nWhen a letter is written in reply to an-\\nother, the date of the letter to which the\\nreply is made should be given, and it is an\\nexcellent plan, and one that saves much\\ntime, to give in a letter the substance of\\nthe one to which it is a reply. This is\\nespecially desirable when accepting a special\\noffer made in such letter, thus:\\nMr. A. FLANAGAN,\\nChicago, Illinois.\\nDear Sir:\\nYour favor of Feb. 15, in which you offer us\\na discount of 33^ per cent, on your books, when\\npurchased in lots of 100 or more, came duly. We\\n113", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0121.jp2"}, "122": {"fulltext": "114 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nherewith enclose our check for three hundred dol-\\nlars ($300.), for which please ship us, by freight\\nthe following:\\n100 copies of Words; Their Use and Abuse.\\n100 Getting on in the World.\\nI 100 Hours with Men and Books.\\nRespectfully,\\nGeo. W. Jones Co.\\nBoulder, Colo., April 3, 1899.\\nGriggsville, 111.\\nMessrs. Harper Brothers,\\nNew York.\\nGentlemen:\\nEnclosed is a post-office order for $3, for\\nwhich please send me Harper s New Monthly\\nMagazine for one year, beginning with the May\\nnumber. Respectfully,\\n(Miss) Sara Brown.\\nWhen writing a business letter, a married\\nwoman should sign her name as she would\\nsign it when writing any other letter; that\\nis, by placing her first name and surname in\\nthe usual position of the signature, and add-\\ning, a little to the left-hand, her name in\\nfull, with the address, thus:\\nSt. Paul, Minn., Nov. 9th, 1899.\\nMessrs. Harper Brothers,\\nNew York.\\nGentlemen\\nPlease send me one copy of How Women\\nShould Ride, for which you will find enclosed one\\ndollar and twenty-five cents ($1.25).\\nRespectfully,\\nEmma C. Bowen.\\nMrs. Charles E. Bowen,\\n324 Dupont Avenue.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0122.jp2"}, "123": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 115\\nWhen writing to a person or firm for in-\\nformation solely for one s own benefit, a\\npostal card or a stamped envelope should\\nbe enclosed for a reply.\\nIt is a too common custom among people\\nunacquainted with the rules of business,\\nwhen sending an order to one firm, to en-\\nclose money to be paid another, or with\\nwhich to make small purchases in some other\\nline, to be sent in the package ordered from\\nthe firm with which the correspondence is\\nheld. The proper way to do when one\\nwishes to order goods from different houses\\nin the same city, and yet have all the goods\\nshipped in the same package, is to write an\\norder to each firm requesting the goods\\nto be delivered to the firm with which one\\ndoes the most business, having, of course,\\nnotified such firm of his action.\\nIt has become so common among people\\nto request everything by return mail that\\nbusiness men look upon such requests as a\\nmere form, rather than as an evidence of\\nurgency. If such urgency exists, it is well\\nto state the cause of it in a few words, and\\nrequest immediate attention to the order,\\nthus:\\nHarvard, 111., Nov. 2, 1899.\\nMessrs. a. C. McCijjrg Co.,\\nChicago.\\nGentlemen:\\nI enclose herewith $2, for which please send\\nme a copy of Longfellow s poetical works. You", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0123.jp2"}, "124": {"fulltext": "116 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nwill oblige me by sending the book by return mail,\\nas I wish to use it on the evening of the 4th inst.\\nRespectfully,\\nJames Weixs.\\nWhoever writes a caustic letter makes a\\nmistake; for it will do no good, even if there\\nseems to be a cause for it, and if the assumed\\ncause proves to be simply a mistake the\\nwriter will be humilated.\\nLETTERS OF APPLICATION.\\nIt is sometimes difficult to write a letter\\nof application, because one must speak of\\nhimself and of his ability to fill the position\\nsought, and to do so without seeming\\negotistic. If the applicant has had experi-\\nence in work similar to that for which he\\napplies, a simple statement of the fact, the\\nlength of time engaged in such work, the\\nreason for quitting his last position, and the\\nname and address of his former employer,\\nshould form the substance of his letter. If\\nhe has had no experience, he should state\\nwhat advantages he has had to qualify him-\\nself for the work, and not boast that he\\ncould soon and easily learn to do it.\\nj The following will exemplify the points:\\n124 La Salle St.,\\nChicago, Sept. 24, 1899.\\nMessrs. A. G. Baker Co.,\\nKirkwood, Ohio.\\nGentlemen:\\nI am informed by a friend, Mr. C. A.\\nBrooks, of your village, that you are in want of a", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0124.jp2"}, "125": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 117\\nbook-keeper, and I desire to make application for\\nthe position. I am a young man, but have had\\nseveral years experience in keeping books. I am\\nnow in charge of the books of Messrs. Jones\\nWilliams, of this city, to whom I can refer you for\\ninformation as to my ability and character. I de-\\nsire to go to the country, and should be glad to\\nwork for you, if you can pay me $70 per month,\\nwhich is my present salary.\\nVery respectfully,\\nT. R. MlU.ER.\\nSalem, Wis., May 15, 1899.\\nMessrs. Clark Wii^iams,\\n107 State Street, Chicago.\\nGentlemen:\\nI am informed that your shipping clerk is\\nsoon to leave, and that the position now held by\\nhim will be vacant. I desire to apply for the\\nsame, but I am sorry to state that I have not had\\nany experience in this particular line of work;\\nhowever, I have been a general clerk in a village\\nstore, and am familiar with simple book-keeping,\\nwhich would probably enable me to learn the\\nwork of a shipping clerk in a reasonable length of\\ntime.\\nIn case you should wish to engage me on\\ntrial, I would gladly assist, without compensation,\\nyour present clerk until the end of his engage-\\nment, which, I understand, is about three weeks\\nfrom date.\\nMy present employer is Mr. G. W. Webster,\\nof this place, and he will doubtless answer any in-\\nquiries concerning my work that you may address\\nhim.\\nRespectfully,\\nGeo. E. Johnson.\\nSuch letters should always contain a\\nstamp for a reply. The stamp is attached", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0125.jp2"}, "126": {"fulltext": "118 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nby its corner or by a pin to the head of the\\nletter.\\nGreat precaution should always be taken\\nnot to send a letter with insufficient postage\\non it; for the additional postage is collected\\nfrom the person to whom the letter is sent,\\nand many business men look upon such\\nneglect as inexcusable, if they do not con-\\nsider it dishonest, inasmuch as it compels\\nothers to pay what the writer should have\\nknown it was his duty to pay.\\nAn application for a position as teacher in\\na public school is often very difficult to\\nwrite, because it is necessary to say much,\\nand to say it, in some cases, to men who\\nare not thoroughly familiar with business\\nprinciples.\\nBefore giving any forms, some sugges-\\ntions which experience has taught may be\\nof great importance. The handwriting\\nshould be natural. If one has a degree, he\\nshould not sign his name with it, but state\\nin his letter that he is a graduate, naming\\nthe institution from which he was gradu-\\nated. All boasting should be avoided.\\nOne should not ask a reply by return mail,\\nbut he might enclose a postal card or a\\nstamp with a request to be informed when\\nthe board meets to consider applications.\\nOne ought not to name as references per-\\nsons who know nothing about his work; for", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0126.jp2"}, "127": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 119\\nalthough they may, if consulted, endeavor\\nto praise him, they will show their ignor-\\nance of what he has done, and the board\\nwill naturally assume that he has no better\\nreferences.\\nAs a rule it is not advisable to give testi-\\nmonials from ministers or from county\\nsuperintendents, unless the writers can say\\nthat they are familiar with the teacher s\\nwork, and have visited his school. Very\\nold testimonials should not be placed be-\\nfore a board. Indeed, it is doubtful whether\\nany testimonial, unless it comes from a\\ncompetent judge, is of value.\\nIf boards would consult one s references,\\nor seek information from outside sources, it\\nwould be only just to all concerned; but as\\nthey will not often do this, it is wise to\\nsend copies of two or three, generally not\\nmore, good testimonials, and to have one\\nor two of the applicant s friends write the\\nboard in his behalf.\\nA letter of application, especially if for\\nthe position of superintendent or that of\\nprincipal, should be full and explicit, speci-\\nfying the opportunities the writer has had\\nto prepare himself for the position, rather\\nthan stating that he has done so-and-so, for\\nin the latter case it might seem like boast-\\ning.\\nSometimes a short letter, unless circum-", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0127.jp2"}, "128": {"fulltext": "120 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nstances demand a long one, will be most fa-\\nvorably received by a board. The writer\\nonce knew a very important position to be\\nobtained by a correspondence about as fol-\\nlows (names of places, dates, etc., are omit-\\nted):\\nTo the Honorable Board of Education.\\nGentlemen:\\nI learn through a friend in your county, that\\nthe position of superintendent of your school is va-\\ncant. If the position has not been filled, I desire\\nto make application for the same. I am a gradu-\\nate of and have taught three years.\\nI am now principal of the schools, but\\ndesire to teach in your State, as my home is there.\\nRespectfully,\\nA stamp was enclosed for a reply. The\\nsecretary of the board at once wrote asking\\nfor references and stating the salary paid.\\nThe applicant replied that he did not wish\\nthe position at the salary named, and\\nthanked the secretary for the trouble he had\\nbeen given.\\nHad the applicant written a long letter,\\nsetting forth the value of his services, and\\nurging the board to raise the salary, it is\\nnot probable that a reply would have been\\nreceived by him. The simple statement\\nthat he did not want the position at the sal-\\nary named, was evidence to the board that\\nhe considered his services worth more, and,\\nmoreover, that he had confidence that he", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0128.jp2"}, "129": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 121\\nwould command more. The secretary re-\\nplied to the last short note, asking for ref-\\nerences and at what salary he would ac-\\ncept the position. The information was\\ngiven, and in a few days the applicant was\\nrequested to meet the board with the assur-\\nance that the position would be given him\\nif the interview proved satisfactory, which\\nit did. Afterwards the applicant was in-\\nformed by the president of the board that\\nhis short business-like letters, written in an\\nalmost illegible but natural hand, obtained\\nfor him the place over nearly one hundred\\napplicants, many of whom were college\\ngraduates of long experience in teaching,\\nand who had basketfuls of testimonials, but\\nnot one of whom had written even a fairly\\ngood letter of application.\\nMany cities and towns have stated public\\nexaminations, which applicants must attend\\nbefore they can be employed.\\nThe impression of character and of qual-\\nification produced by a personal interview\\nis deemed so important that even minor ap-\\npointments are scarcely given to any one\\nnot personally known to one of the school\\nboard, or to some one in whose professional\\njudgment they have great confidence.\\nPreliminary inquiries about positions are\\nmost profitably made through acquaintances,\\nwho ean advise one whether to take any\\nfurther steps. One might write as follows:", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0129.jp2"}, "130": {"fulltext": "122 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nChicago, 111., Nov. 3, 1899.\\nMy Dear Friend:\\nMay I trouble you to ascertain whether there\\nis any vacancy in the schools at Elgin, to which I\\nwould have any prospect of an appointment? You\\nwill confer a great favor upon me if you will ask the\\nsuperintendent, and let me know soon what he\\nsays. You can say to him that after I finished the\\nhigh school course at Racine, I taught a term in a\\ndistrict school in Racine County, Wis. and was one\\nyear in charge of a primary department at Wood-\\nstock, and that I had charge of the grammar de-\\npartment at the latter place last year.\\nYou know something of the work I have\\ndone, and I can furnish testimonials from the school\\nofficers where I have taught.\\nYours very truly,\\nEmma C. Bowen.\\nIf a favorable answer is received, some-\\nthing like the following form may be used,\\nwhich is also a form suitable to make appli-\\ncation where one is already acquainted, and\\nwhere formal applications are expected.\\nChicago, 111., Jan. 10, 1899.\\nMr. C. E. Ryan,\\nSupt. of Public Schools,\\nElgin, 111.\\nDear Sir:\\nI desire to obtain a position in the schools of\\nyour city. I enclose a letter from Mr. Henry Jones,\\na director of Woodstock, where I last taught; and I\\nrefer you to Mrs. Mary Smith, of Elgin. I prefer\\nthe intermediate work, but would not object to any\\nposition that I may be able to fill.\\nI completed the course in the Racine High\\nSchool, and have taught a little more than two years,", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0130.jp2"}, "131": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 123\\nfirst in a country school, then in a primary school\\na year at Woodstock, where I afterward had charge\\nof the grammar room for a year.\\nPlease inform me when and by whom can-\\ndidates are examined, as well as what vacancies\\nthere are, and be kind enough to make any sugges-\\ntions that you think will be helpful to me.\\nVery respectfully,\\n(Miss) Emma C. Bowen.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0131.jp2"}, "132": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER XII.\\nGENERAL HINTS.\\nWe remain shackled by timidity till we have\\nlearned to speak and act with propriety.\u00e2\u0080\u0094\\nSamuel Johnson.\\nA man raises his hat when walking with\\nanother, not only to his own acquaintances,\\nbut to those persons who bow to his com-\\npanion, whether he is acquainted with them\\nor not.\\nIf a man meets a woman in a hotel corri-\\ndor or hall he should step aside, allowing\\nher to pass, and raising his hat.\\nIf in a public place a man hands a woman\\nanything she has dropped, he should raise\\nhis hat when offering it to her. A well-\\nbred man raises his hat after passing the\\nfare of a woman in a car or coach. This\\ndoes not mean that he has any desire to\\nbecome acquainted with her, but it is his\\ntribute to her sex.\\nSlight inaccuracies in statements should\\nnot be corrected in the presence of others.\\nOne should give her children, unless\\nmarried, their christian names only, or say\\nmy daughter or my son, in speaking\\nof them to anyone excepting servants.\\n124", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0132.jp2"}, "133": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 125\\nMen remove their hats when in elevators\\nin the presence of women.\\nMen having occasion to pass before women\\nseated in lecture and concert rooms, and all\\nother places, should beg pardon, and\\npass with their faces, and not their backs,\\ntoward them.\\nIn going up or down stairs, a man pre-\\ncedes a woman or walks by her side.\\nTo indulge in ridicule of another, whether\\nthe subject be present or absent, is to de-\\nscend below the level of gentlemanly pro-\\npriety.\\nA reverence for religious observances and\\nreligious opinions is a distinguishing trait\\nof a refined mind.\\nReligious topics should be avoided in con-\\nversation, except where all are prepared to\\nconcur in a respectful treatment of the sub-\\nject. In mixed societies the subject should\\nnever be introduced.\\nFrequent consultation of the watch or\\ntime-piece is impolite, either when at home or\\nabroad. If at home, it appears as if one\\nwere tired of the company and wished them\\nto be gone; if abroad, as if the hours dragged\\nheavily, and one were calculating how soon\\nhe would be released.\\nIt is very unbecoming to exhibit petul-\\nance or angry feeling, though it is indulged", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0133.jp2"}, "134": {"fulltext": "126 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nin largely in almost every circle. The true\\ngentleman does not suffer his countenance\\nto be easily ruffled.\\nThe right of privacy is sacred, and should\\nalways be respected. It is exceedingly im-\\nproper to enter a private room without\\nknocking. No relation, however intimate,\\nwill justisy an abrupt intrusion upon\\na private apartment. Likewise the trunk,\\nboxes, packets, papers, or letters of any in-\\ndividual, locked or unlocked, sealed or un-\\nsealed, are sacred. It is ill-mannered even\\nto open a book-case, or to read a written\\npaper lying open, without permission, ex-\\npressed or implied.\\nMembers of the same family should never\\ndiffer with each other in public.\\nOne should never appear to be thinking\\nof his own personal rights to the resenting\\nof a little slight, whether real or imaginary.\\nIn small communities where near neigh-\\nbors, for convenience s sake, borrow back and\\nforth, great care should be taken that the\\npractice does not become a nuisance, as it\\nsurely does when it is indulged in too fre-\\nquently, and when borrowed articles are\\nnot speedily returned and in good condi-\\ntion. There should be no stinted measures\\nin returning.\\nOstentation is snobbish, as is all too great\\nprofusion.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0134.jp2"}, "135": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 127\\nTo affect not to remember a person is\\ndespicable, and reflects only on the preten-\\nder.\\nSome conceited or ill-bred people imagine\\nthey make themselves important and power-\\nful by being rude and insulting.\\nOne is judged, to a great extent, by the\\ncharacter of his associates.\\nOne should be very careful how he asks\\nfor the loan of a book. If interest is shown\\nin one, its owner will offer it for perusal if\\nwilling to lend it. When reading a bor-\\nrowed book, one should take the best of\\ncare of it, and return it as soon as possible.\\nNo real lady or gentlemen will leave finger\\nprints upon its pages, or turn down its\\nleaves in place of a book-mark, or scribble\\nin it with a pencil, or loan it to a third per-\\nson without the knowledge and consent of\\nthe owner.\\nA lack of reverence in one in the house of\\nGod, implies low parentage, or a coarse na-\\nture that is not subject to refinement.\\nTo whisper and laugh during any public\\nentertainment proclaims one s ill-breeding,\\nand invades the rights of others.\\nOne ought never to leave the house after\\nthe evening s entertainment without bidding\\nthe hostess good-night, and acknowledging\\nthe pleasure the evening has afforded him.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0135.jp2"}, "136": {"fulltext": "128 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nThe business man has no stock-in-trade\\nthat pays him better than a good address.\\nIt is only those persons and families\\nwhose position is not a secure one, that are\\nafraid to be seen outside their own social\\ncircle.\\nOne should never reprove servants or\\nchildren before strangers.\\nA true lady will not betray her astonish-\\nment at any violation of conventional rules,\\nleast of all will she make it her province to\\npunish those who may make any such vio-\\nlation.\\nIf one, on meeting another, fails to re-\\ncall the name, he should frankly say so.\\nOne should never recall himself to the\\nrecollection of a casual acquaintance with-\\nout at the same time mentioning his name.\\nIn a flat-house a man should take his hat\\nand coat into the apartment where he is go-\\ning to call, and not leave them in the hall\\non the first floor.\\nIt is very bad taste, even in quite a large\\nparty, for young girls to visit a man at his\\noffice.\\nIt is perfectly good form for a mother\\nto invite to a little child s party children\\nwhose parents she does not know, or who\\nhave not yet called upon her. The invita-\\ntions go out in the child s name and to the\\nchild s friends.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0136.jp2"}, "137": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 129\\nIt is extremely rude and ill-bred, when at\\na boarding-house or hotel table, to criticise\\nthe food that is served. The fact that it is\\npaid for makes it none the less an evidence\\nof bad manners. People who are not satis-\\nfied where they are boarding should always\\nleave; they have no right to make others\\nuncomfortable by their lack of good-breed-\\ning.\\nWomen of good-breeding do not permit\\nthemselves to overlook those to whom\\ncourtesies are due.\\nA man should learn to put his coat on in\\na public place of entertainment so that he\\nwill not require assistance from the woman\\nwho is with him.\\nThe young woman to whom a seat is of-\\nfered should take it, unless her companion\\nis an older woman, when it would be quite\\nproper to extend the courtesy to her.\\nIt is very bad taste, even for a frolic, for\\na young girl to assume boy s clothes, or get\\nherself up in any way that will tend to make\\nherself look masculine.\\nThere is no impropriety in giving to those\\nmen friends with whom one is well acquaint-\\ned, some trifling souvenir at Christmas or\\nEaster, or on birthdays.\\nIt is customary for a young man to send\\na young woman only such gifts as flowers,", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0137.jp2"}, "138": {"fulltext": "130 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\ncandy, and books; and as these presents are\\nsent merely as a slight return for her hospi-\\ntality and invitations to her house, etc. it is\\nnot necessary for her to send him any gift\\nin return. If, however, a young woman\\nand man are on intimate enough terms to\\nexchange presents, she may send him any\\nsmall article for the desk or toilet; such as\\na silver-handled whisk broom, court-plaster\\ncase, pen-wiper, paper-cutter, or books,\\nwhich are a good present and always ac-\\nceptable to any one.\\nNothing looks more ill-bred than to see a\\nyoung man, under his parents roof, devot-\\ning himself during a whole evening entirely\\nto one young woman to the ignoring of the\\nothers.\\nA man who is escorting two women in\\nthe street should not walk between them,\\nbut on the outside of both near the curb; at\\nthe theater or at any place of amusement or\\nat church, he should sit nearest to the aisle,\\nat the side of one of them.\\nUnless there is some good reason why she\\nneeds his support, a man seldom offers his\\narm to a woman he escorts, even in the\\nevening. A husband may offer his arm to\\nhis wife, of course, and a man may proffer\\nthis help to an invalid or aged person.\\nA little delicate perfume may be used with\\npropriety, but a heavy perfume, and one", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0138.jp2"}, "139": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 131\\nthat scents the entire room in which the\\nperson who uses it happens to be, is in very-\\nDad form.\\nIn opening a door from the hall to the\\ndrawing-room, a man should hold it while\\na woman precedes him in entering.\\nWhen one s pardon is asked for some\\nslight inattention, an inclination of the\\nhead and a smile is the best answer.\\nThe words gentleman friend and\\nlady friend have been so vulgarized that\\nmost well-bred women now say man\\nfriend or woman friend, it being taken\\nfor granted that they number among their\\nfriends only ladies and gentlemen.\\nCustom never condones liberties, no mat-\\nter how slight, between young men and\\nwomen.\\nWhen a woman is visiting, any acquaint-\\nance who should call upon her should also\\nask for her hostess, and if she is absent\\nleave a card for her.\\nIt is considered very bad taste for a\\nyoung girl to address a man with whom\\nher acquaintance is but slight by his chris-\\ntian name.\\nNo young man has any right to spend\\nthe entire afternoon and evening every\\nSunday at one particular housef to the an-\\nnoyance of an entire family, who do not", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0139.jp2"}, "140": {"fulltext": "132 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nlike to make him conscious of the fact that\\nthey consider him a bore.\\nWhen a young man is paying a visit,\\nand the older members of the family are in\\nthe room, he should, in leaving, bid them\\ngood-night first, and afterward say his fare-\\nwell to the young girl on whom he has\\ncalled. It is in bad taste for her to go any\\nfurther than the parlor door with him.\\nEven if a correspondence is of a purely\\nfriendly character, it should not exist be-\\ntween a married woman and a young man,\\nor between a married man and a young\\nwoman.\\nIt is not good taste to ask one s men\\nfriends to buy tickets for charity affairs.\\nThey do not like to refuse, and very often,\\nthough the sum required may be small,\\nthey cannot afford it.\\nThere is very great harm in young girls\\nmeeting young men in secret; the men will\\nhave no respect for the girls, and nothing\\nbut mortification for the girls will be the\\nresult.\\nIt is quite proper to thank any public\\nservant, such as a railroad conductor, for\\nany information he may give, but it is not\\nnecessary to be effusive about it.\\nIt is not in good taste, nor even proper,\\nfor young women to go alone to a hotel to\\ndine with a man.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0140.jp2"}, "141": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 133\\nWhen a girl is young and pretty, a Pla-\\ntonic friendship is very difficult to keep up.\\nWhen a man friend has driven a woman\\nin town to go to church he should take her\\ndirect to the church and leave her there\\nwhile he drives where his carriage and\\nhorses are to wait until after the service. Of\\ncourse he would walk to church and join\\nher there.\\nIt is not in good taste for different mem-\\nbers of a party to go off in pairs, and spend\\nthe evening alone on the seashore.\\nIt is not wise for a young woman and\\nyoung man living in the same city to corres-\\npond. If meeting each other often they\\nought to be able to say all that is necessary.\\nOne has no right whatever to read a pos-\\ntal card addressed to another without per-\\nmission.\\nThe very minute the married man begins\\nto tell of his wife s faults, the time has come\\nto cut his acquaintance.\\nIt is more than wrong for a young girl to\\nreceive visits from a married man.\\nIn entering any public place a woman\\nshould precede a man, but going down the\\naisle, the usher, of course, would precede\\nher.\\nA hostess stands to receive her visitors,\\nbut she does not advance to meet them unless", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0141.jp2"}, "142": {"fulltext": "134 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nthe visitor should be some one quite old or\\nof such importance that the visit is of great\\nhonor. The hostess extends her hand to\\nthe men who call, as well as to the women.\\nA woman is not supposed to recognize a\\nman who is one of a group standing in a\\npublic place, since a modest girl will not\\nlook close enough at a group of men to\\nrecognize an acquaintance.\\nNo matter how well a woman may know\\na man, it would be in very bad form to send\\nhim an invitation which does not include\\nhis wife, unless it should be at some affair\\nat which only men are to be present.\\nA man should show as much courtesy to\\na woman in his employ as he does to the\\nwomen he meets in social life.\\nIt is not in good taste to visit at the home\\nof one s betrothed, unless a personal invita-\\ntion is received from his mother.\\nTwo women may attend, with perfect\\npropriety, a place of amusement without an\\nescort. They should be, however, under\\nsuch circumstances, exceptionally quiet in\\ntheir manners and their dress.\\nIn escorting a young woman home, a man\\nshould go up the steps with her, wait until\\nthe door is opened, and, as she enteres the\\nhouse, raise his hat and say good-night.\\nIf a young girl were very ill, there would", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0142.jp2"}, "143": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 135\\nbe no impropriety in her mother bringing her\\nbetrothed to see her, although, of course,\\nshe would remain in the room during his\\nvisit.\\nIt is always proper and courteous for a per-\\nson in church to share either prayer-book\\nor hymnal with anyone who may be with-\\nout either.\\nThere is no impropriety in a woman s\\npermitting a man friend to assist her in\\nputting on her over-shoes.\\nIf one approves of the acting or the senti-\\nment of the play, there is no impropriety in\\nexpressing gentle applause, but a loud\\nclapping of the hands is decidedly vulgar.\\nOne should never prevent people from\\nleaving his house when they desire. That\\nis not hospitality. It is tyranny; it is tak-\\ning a mean advantage of their unwillingness\\nto offend.\\nIf a women lives in a boarding house and\\nhas only one room, it would be very bad taste\\nto receive any man visitor there. Even if\\nit is not quite so agreeable, they should be\\nreceived in the public parlor.\\nWhen a man and woman approach a\\nhostess together, the hostess should shake\\nhands with the woman first.\\nWhen a man calls on a woman, he shakes\\nhands with her on his arrival; but, unless\\ny-", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0143.jp2"}, "144": {"fulltext": "136 PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE.\\nhe is very intimate in the house, a simple\\nbow is sufficient when he leaves.\\nAn unmarried woman writing her name\\nin a hotel register should prefix it with\\n4 Miss in parentheses.\\nWhen a man friend has taken a lady to\\na concert, she should thank him for his\\nkindness in having given her a pleasant\\nevening.\\nTt is not advisable for a girl to diliberately\\n1 cut any man. If she wishes to discon-\\ntinue her acquaintance with a man whom\\nshe cannot respect, it may be done grad-\\nually, at first by the coolest of greetings;\\nthen, by a look in the other direction; and\\nin time all recognition will cease.\\nIf a stranger takes occasion to be polite\\nto one during a street-car accident, all that\\nis necessary is a polite thank you.\\nWhen a man who is to escort a girl to an\\nentertainment calls for her at her own\\nhome, it is proper for her to appear with\\nher wraps on, and be ready to start at once.\\nIf a man is courteous enough to open the\\ndoor of a store or any public building for a\\nwoman, she should thank him.\\nIf a girl of sixteen goes to an evening af-\\nfair, her mother should arrange to have\\neither a servant or a member of the family\\ngo after her to bring her home.", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0144.jp2"}, "145": {"fulltext": "PRACTICAL ETIQUETTE. 137\\nIf the hostess opens the door for a man\\ncaller, she should precede him in entering\\nthe parlor.\\nAfter having taken a meal or having re-\\nceived any other kind of entertainment at a\\nprivate house, before leaving a guest\\nshould express his thanks, or, rather his\\nenjoyment, of the same to the hostess.\\nThis courtesy from a young man or girl is\\nvery acceptable to elderly ladies.\\nQueen Victoria has forgiven certain\\nbreaches of etiquette made in ignorance,\\nand left her guest to discover the mistake\\nat another time. It is a reprehensible host\\nindeed who does otherwise, and so makes a\\nguest uncomfortable. Etiquette is all\\nwrong and false when it makes one forget\\nthe higher laws of courtesy or hospitality.", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0145.jp2"}, "146": {"fulltext": "", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0146.jp2"}, "147": {"fulltext": "", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0147.jp2"}, "148": {"fulltext": "", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0148.jp2"}, "149": {"fulltext": "", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0149.jp2"}, "150": {"fulltext": "199\\nDeacidified using the Bookkeeper proce\\nNeutralizing agent: Magnesium Oxide\\nTreatment Date: Dec. 2004\\nPreservationTechnologii\\nA WORLD LEADER IN PAPER PRESERVAT\\n1 1 1 Thomson Park Drive\\nCranberry Township, PA 16066\\n(724)779-2111", "height": "3196", "width": "1909", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0150.jp2"}, "151": {"fulltext": "", "height": "3223", "width": "1982", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0151.jp2"}, "152": {"fulltext": "", "height": "3314", "width": "2042", "jp2-path": "practicaletiquet00klei_0152.jp2"}}