{"1": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4679", "width": "2858", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0001.jp2"}, "2": {"fulltext": "Library of Congress.\\nUNITED STATES OF AMERICA.\\nShelf ._Ly_4--_.", "height": "4498", "width": "2676", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0002.jp2"}, "3": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4498", "width": "2676", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0003.jp2"}, "4": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4432", "width": "2590", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0004.jp2"}, "5": {"fulltext": "EIHICAL\\nMARRIAGE\\nA DISCUSSION OF\\nTHE RELATIONS\\nOF SEX FROM\\nTHE STANDPOINT\\nOF SOCIAL DUTY\\nBY\\nDELOS F. WILCOX, PH. D.\\nf\\nWOOD- ALLEN PUBLISHING CO.,\\nAnn Arbor, Mich.", "height": "4432", "width": "2590", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0005.jp2"}, "6": {"fulltext": "A\\n24210\\nXJ ij**-\u00c2\u00ab* kr\\nLact_23 lado\\nCopyright, 19CX), by Dei^os F. Wii^cox.\\nEntered at Stationer s Hall, I^ondon, Eng.", "height": "4432", "width": "2590", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0006.jp2"}, "7": {"fulltext": "This book is dedicated to the youths and\\nmaidens who do what they think they ought to\\ndo, admitting no ideal that is impracticable, and\\nomitting no duty that is seen.", "height": "4432", "width": "2590", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0007.jp2"}, "8": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4432", "width": "2590", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0008.jp2"}, "9": {"fulltext": "PREFACE.\\nTHIS little book embodies a protest against\\nthe idea that the morals of marriage are\\na subject to be discussed by physicians alone, and\\nas incidental to sexual pathology. Doctor\\nbooks are kept in many households on a high\\nand forbidden shelf. A good book on the phys-\\niology and ethics of the sex-life ought not to be\\nout of place on the center-table or the mantel.\\nBut this book aims to be more than a protest.\\nIts purpose is constructive to point the way\\npositively as well as negatively along which peo-\\nple may go to a life of greater happiness, keener\\nintelligence, and truer responsibility. I have\\nendeavored to keep free from purely visionary\\ntheories, and to limit myself in all essential points\\nto what is strictly practicable. In questions of\\nthe morals of sex, as in all other ethical ques-\\ntions, we should steer clear of the Scylla of the\\ndreamer and the Charybdis of the man of the\\nworld. The former would impose upon us im-\\npracticable ideals; the latter would persuade us\\nthat ideals are impracticable. Du^y can always\\nbe done, not always easily, but always more\\neasily when we set about it than when we leave\\nit to set about us. This book, then, by throw-\\ning the relations of marriage open to discussion,\\nattempts, as it were, to redeem a wide field of\\n5", "height": "4432", "width": "2590", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0009.jp2"}, "10": {"fulltext": "6 PREFACE,\\nhuman conduct to the domain of ethical princi-\\nples. Furthermore, in accordance with the spirit\\nof the best thought of the time the ethical ideals\\nurged here receive their highest sanction from\\nthe facts of social relations and social duties.\\nThere is much need that the youth of the world\\nshould recognize the social importance of sex-\\nlove and the structure and functions of the\\nfamily.\\nI am deeply indebted to the associations, an-\\ntagonisms, and friendships of a body of earnest\\ncollege men and women with whom for the first\\ntime in my experience discussion became free.\\nThere are many who have helped me directly\\nand indirectly toward the realization of the\\nthought of this book, especially a brother who\\nhas from my youth urged me to ideal aims, a\\nhome-mate whose confidence and sympathy have\\nmade self-control and freedom of friendship easy,\\nand a little daughter whose strong body and\\nsturdy heart make me more than ever confident\\nof the blessings regenerated marriage has in\\nstore for the children. I am under obligations\\nto numerous friends for suggestions in regard to\\nthe manuscript, and particularly to Miss Flor-\\nence S. Webb for careful corrections and for\\nhelp in the preparation of the notes.\\nDKI.OS F. W11.COX.\\nElk Rapids, Mich,, May, igoo.", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0010.jp2"}, "11": {"fulltext": "CONTENTS\\nChap. Page.\\nIntroduction 9\\nI. THE SUPREME CO-OPERATION.\\nReproduction a Sociai, Function.\\nThk Fittest Shoui d Marry\\nHindrances TO Marriage\\nThe Fit and the Unfit\\nII. PREPARATION FOR MARRIAGE.\\nI\\n15\\nII\\n24\\nIII\\n30\\nIV\\n38\\nV\\n49\\nVI\\n55\\nVII\\n58\\nVIII\\n68\\nCurrent iDEAi^s.\\nMotives for Marriage\\nLove and Friendship\\nDuties of Courtship\\nIII. THE CONTROL OF PASSION IN\\nMARRIAGE.\\nA Program OF Procreation\\nAl^TERNATlVES TO CONTINENCE\\nObjections to Continence in Marriage\\nPracticabii^ity of Continence in Mar-\\nriage XII 121\\nMarriage FOR Companionship. XIII 127\\n7\\nIX\\n81\\nX\\n87\\nXI\\n103", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0011.jp2"}, "12": {"fulltext": "8 CONTENTS,\\nIV. THE LINKS OF LIFE.\\nFatherhood XIV 133\\nMotherhood XV 137\\nCHII.DH00D. XVI 142\\nFriendship XVII 152\\nV. SOCIAL COROLLARIES.\\nThe FAMI1.Y XVIII 161\\nThe Neighborhood XIX 166\\nThe City XX 170\\nThe State XXI 177\\nHumanity XXII 182\\nNotes 187\\nList oe Authors 232", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0012.jp2"}, "13": {"fulltext": "ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nINTRODUCTION.\\nTHE intensity of the passion that unites the\\nsexes seems to have rendered men almost\\nuniversally unable to take a rational view of sex\\nrelations. The revolt against sensuality has at\\ntimes filled the world with an ascetic outcry\\ndenouncing marriage as impure and enjoining\\ncelibacy upon the priests of God.^ Yet in all\\ncountries and in all ages, men, whether the\\ndefenders or the opponents of marriage, have\\nalmost unanimously assumed as a matter of\\ncourse that the marriage ceremony gives a license\\nto the indulgence of passion for its own sake\\nwith or without reproduction as a result. This\\nview has had its foundation in the idea that\\nindividual desire rather than social duty is the\\ndetermining motive in marriage. It has been\\nconsidered that the taint of sensuality and the\\nworst consequences of sexual indulgence are\\nremoved by the permanent union of one man\\nand one woman in a home. But new conditions\\nof life and a new conception of social unity\\ndemand a higher ideal of marriage.\\n9", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0013.jp2"}, "14": {"fulltext": "lO ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nThe fundamental proposition of this book is\\nthat marriage and sexual union for procreation\\nonly are a primary social duty, presumably bind-\\ning upon all well-developed men and women.\\nThis thesis is elaborated according to the follow-\\ning outline\\nThe permanence of the marriage relation is\\nsanctioned by the social necessities of reproduc-\\ntion interpreted as including the procreation,\\nrearing, and education of children. The purpose\\nof reproduction is the renewal and improvement\\nof human life, on the assumption that life is\\nworth living when it is lived well. This purpose\\ncan be fulfilled only through general participation\\nin family life on the part of the adult men and\\nwomen best fitted for it. Marriage is, therefore,\\na dut}^ binding upon all well-equipped people\\nwho can not show some larger obligation that is\\ninconsistent with this.\\nMarriage, based on social duty, is a purposive\\nco-operation, and, therefore, requires the union\\nof persons fitted to co-operate permanently\\nthrough friendship and community of ideals.\\nThose who are engaged to marry ought to pre-\\npare for their work by securing as complete and\\naccurate information with reference to the func-\\ntions of sex as possible, and by free discussion\\nwith each other.", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0014.jp2"}, "15": {"fulltext": "INTRODUCTION-, II\\nA married couple should have a definite pro-\\ngram of procreation, and should confine their\\nsexual unions strictly to its requirements. Any\\nalternative course of life is fraught with danger\\nto health, morals, love, and social responsibilities.\\nThe objections to continence in marriage have\\nlittle force for men and women who live temper-\\nate lives and who desire to control their passions.\\nThe recognition of social duty as paramount\\nin marriage, and the adoption of continence as\\nthe rule of life in marriage, would immeasurably\\nenrich the most important personal relationships\\nof life; namely, fatherhood, motherhood, child-\\nhood, and friendship.\\nThe results of these fundamental reforms in\\nthe relations of the sexes would enable the\\nfamily to perform its function as the primary\\nunit of political society, and would unify the\\nneighborhood, strengthen the co-operative Ufe\\nof the city, ennoble the ideals of the State, and\\nprepare the way for a religion whose purpose\\nwould be the perfection of human society in this\\nworld.", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0015.jp2"}, "16": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0016.jp2"}, "17": {"fulltext": "I.\\nTHE SUPREME CO-OPERATION.\\nWe have been long expecting that you would\\ntell us something about the family life of your citi-\\nzens how they will bring children into the world\\nand rear them when they have arrived\\nfor we are of opinion that the right or wrong\\nmanagement of such matters will have a great and\\nparamount influence 07i the State for good or evil.^^\\nAdeimantus to Socrates in Plato^s Republic,^\\n13", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0017.jp2"}, "18": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0018.jp2"}, "19": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER I.\\nREPRODUCTION A SOCIAI, FUNCTION.\\nMARRIAGE is usually described as a con-\\ntract between one man and one woman\\nwho choose to live together in sexual union.\\nThe peculiar nature of this relation and its far-\\nreaching consequences have led the State to\\nmake this contract permanent and generally\\nbinding, even though both parties should wish\\nits dissolution. Ordinarily divorce is granted\\nonly on the petition of one of the parties, show-\\ning that the contract has already been broken by\\nthe other.\\nVarious principles are alleged to be at the\\nbasis of permanence in marriage. Possibly the\\nmost generally accepted one is that of the reli-\\ngious ceremonial, that marriages are made in\\nheaven, and that no man has a right to **put\\nasunder what God has joined together/ Mar-\\nriage rites are still almost always performed by\\nthe servants of the Church, even though the\\ncontracting parties have little or no sympathy\\nwith organized religion. It is popularly believed\\nin Christian countries that lifelong monogamy\\nhas in some way been sanctioned by the Divine\\nPower as the only permissible form of sexual\\n15", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0019.jp2"}, "20": {"fulltext": "l6 ETHICAL MARklAGB,\\nunion/ But the gradual relaxation of the hold\\nwhich the Church formerly had on the lives of\\nthe masses, and the separation of Church and\\nstate, have been followed by a considerable revolt\\nagainst our present form of marriage. Attacked\\nin the arena of modern thought, monogamy has\\nhad to look beyond its supposed divine institution\\nin order to justify itself as the exclusive method\\nof propagation.\\nThe inherent character of love has been called\\nin as a support to monogamy. It is said by\\npersons of the romantic school that love is, in\\nits nature, exclusive and permanent, and that, as\\nit is the only true basis of marriage, the proper\\nform of the latter is the lifelong union of one\\nman and one woman. The flaw in this argu-\\nment is due to the fact that, however exclusive\\nand permanent a few poetic attachments may\\nhave been, the great majority of loves, or at least\\nof first loves, are not everlasting and exclusive.\\nThis is true, perhaps, chiefly because people are\\nurged into love by instincts which could be\\napproximately as well satisfied by union with\\nany one of a great number of persons. There\\nare, doubtless, many cases in which an intel-\\nlectual and spiritual friendship between a man\\nand a woman dies out after promising to them\\nthe permanent satisfaction of mature love.\\nThat this impermanence of exclusive affection is", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0020.jp2"}, "21": {"fulltext": "REPRODUCTION A SOCIAL FUNCTION, I\\nnot wholly due to the caprice of sexual instinct,\\nis indicated by the fleeting friendships which\\noften spring up between persons of the same sex.\\nlyove as a mysterious and irresponsible passion\\nseems to furnish no adequate ground for the\\ngeneral acceptance of lifelong monogamy.\\nThe real sanction for this institution must be\\nsought in social relations and social responsibili-\\nties.* It is, of course, recognized that the pres-\\nence of young children in a family imposes\\nobligations upon the parents, and furnishes a\\nstrong reason for the permanence of the home\\nlife. Infancy covers a long period of years, and\\nwith our modern ideas of education the procrea-\\ntion of a child calls for the formation of a family\\ngroup which shall hold together for, say, twenty\\nyears. A child is not often ready to be thrown\\nupon its own resources before that age. And\\nif, after the procreation of one child, the father\\nand mother should wish to cancel their marriage\\ncontract, they would be confronted by the\\nnecessity of giving twenty years notice, during\\nwhich time they would have to live together for\\nthe sake of the child. It is obvious that such a\\nrequirement would generally preclude the making\\nof later marriages and the begetting of other\\nchildren. Thus we see that however much a\\nman and woman may be moved to marry in the\\nfirst place by purely selfish considerations, no", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0021.jp2"}, "22": {"fulltext": "18 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nsooner is a child brought into existence than the\\npermanence and organization of the family life\\nare determined by obligations wider than the\\nobligations of husband and wife to each other.\\nThe satisfaction of individual desires has brought\\nconsequences that are not individual. Responsi-\\nbility appears.\\nNow what is this mysterious process by which\\nthe individual is made social? How is it that\\na third party, silently entering upon the scene,\\noften an unwelcome visitor and never asking to\\ncome, transforms a group of two persons who\\nhave fancied themselves one in their mutual\\nself-satisfaction, into a social group whose poten-\\ntial responsibilities extend to the limits of the\\nworld and to the end of time Why are children\\nbegotten and born into the world The imme-\\ndiate answer is that men and women are driven\\nby a strong instinct into relations which involun-\\ntarily and by the law of nature result in repro-\\nduction. But why this reproduction? It is\\nuseless to urge this question, for it is one with\\nthe query about life itself. If we rejoice in our\\nlife and accept it as a good, the reason for\\nreproduction is apparent. Children are born that\\nhuman life may continue in the world. It is\\nclear from the investigations of modern science\\nthat Nature believes life to be a good. And it is\\ndoubtless for this reason that strong sexual", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0022.jp2"}, "23": {"fulltext": "REPRODUCTION A SOCIAL FUNCTION. 1 9\\ninstincts have been developed in the lowest\\nhuman beings, which overcome their aversion to\\npain and toil, and provide for the perpetuation of\\nthe race, whether they will or no.\\nAs soon, however, as men reach that stage in\\ncivilization and intelligence where they begin\\nconsciously to direct the forces of nature, when\\nthey recognize duty, and their life becomes\\nethical, they begin to regulate and restrict their\\nnatural passions. Nature still provides for the\\npropagation of beasts solely by means of sexual\\ndesire. But man has entered into the social state,\\nand has begun to consciously direct his own\\ndestiny. He must find some other reason for\\npropagation than mere instinct, or else be bound\\nby his rational nature to repress that instinct.\\nFor human life is altogether too serious a phe-\\nnomenon to be left to the caprice of animal desire\\nafter men have risen to a consciousness of social\\nobligation. This is no mere theory. It is\\nwritten on the face of every state-enacted regu-\\nlation regarding marriage and the relations of\\nthe sexes.\\nIf conscious thought is able to conclude that\\nlife is worth living, thus re-enforcing the dogma\\nof nature, it is to be supposed that society will\\nencourage within well-considered limitations the\\nreproduction of life. If, on the other hand,\\nconscious thought is driven to the negative con-", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0023.jp2"}, "24": {"fulltext": "20 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nelusion that existence is an evil, it is hard to see\\nhow society can permit, much less encourage,\\nreproduction, unless it be as an ignoble conces-\\nsion to passion. Social responsibility, we may\\nreadily admit, has never, in any considerable\\ncommunity, become so universally acknowledged\\nthat the deliberate judgment of the thinking\\nfew could be enforced upon all, to the complete\\ndenial of individual desires. But religious and\\npolitical institutions ought not, on the theory\\nthat life is evil, to encourage or countenance pro-\\ncreation. They ought rather, on that theory, to\\nencourage suicide, or Buddhistic self-abstraction,\\nor whatever process is believed to be most eflGi-\\ncient in getting rid of existence.^\\nWe may assume here that civilized nations,\\nand especially the people of America, believe life\\nto be on the whole a good, and therefore worthy\\nof perpetuation. Yet, even granting this,\\nwhere are we to get the social or the individual\\nmotive for reproduction, except from natural\\ninstincts? What reason have I to assume re-\\nsponsibility for the perpetuation of life? How\\ncan anything be a motive to me unless it refers\\nin some manner to my self-fulfillment We can,\\nof course, accept social duty as a motive for\\naction, when society, through the benefit of this\\naction, is enabled to react upon and enrich our\\nown lives.", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0024.jp2"}, "25": {"fulltext": "^2^\\nRBPkODUCTtON A SOCIAL FUlSfCTION. 21\\nIn order to get a clearer view of the rational\\nbasis for reproduction, let us examine a little\\nmore closely into the practical meaning of this\\nconstant process of race renewal. Let us waive\\nfor the present all individual considerations, and\\nfind, if we can, some motive that appeals to\\nsociety as a whole, to encourage propagation.\\nThe motive is not very deeply hidden. Suppose\\nthat the process of renewal should all at once\\ncease in any given society whose numbers could\\nnot be replenished from outside sources. What\\nwould happen Soon there would be no babies.\\nIn five years there w^ould be no little children.\\nAfter twenty years there would be no boys and\\ngirls. After forty years there would be no\\nyoung people. After sixty years there would be\\nno middle-aged men and women. From then to\\nthe end the old folks would totter on together\\nwith gradually thinning ranks, until at last the\\nsociety would become extinct in the most pitiable\\nmanner conceivable. Perhaps the persons com-\\nposing this society would live as many years as\\nthough reproduction had not stopped. Let us\\nsuppose so. But what of the value of- their lives\\nto themselves? It requires no great boldness to\\nassert that life would be perceptibly less worth\\nliving if there were no children among us under\\nfive years of age. As the years went on with\\nno younger generations growing up, life would", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0025.jp2"}, "26": {"fulltext": "22 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nbecome well-nigh intolerable before it were half\\nspent. It is therefore clear that society in every\\ngeneration has a powerful motive for the encour-\\nagement of reproduction. We may say, then,\\nthat, in so far as human society is organized for\\nthe attainment of desired ends, and in so far as\\nmarriage is regulated by the state and by public\\nopinion for the good of all, reproduction is a\\nsocial function. From this point of view mar-\\nriage comes to be, not a mere contract between\\ntwo parties for their own satisfaction, enforced\\nby the state as a disinterested arbiter, but a\\nco-operation of two persons for the performance\\nof a definite social function in which the state\\nhas a primary interest.\\nMay we not say that organized society, recog-\\nnizing life to be a good, and the preservation of\\nlife to be one of the chief ends of association,\\ncalls upon its adult members to volunteer in\\ncouples for the social function of propagation\\nThis function is of such a nature that it requires\\nfor its fulfillment the permanent association of\\none man and one woman in a home. This con-\\ndition is well known to all, and people enlist for\\nmarriage accepting the conditions. A citizen\\nwho volunteers to serve in the army for a certain\\nperiod, is not at liberty to desert or to resign at\\npleasure. So with those who volunteer to serve\\nthe state as parents. They have accepted respon-", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0026.jp2"}, "27": {"fulltext": "REPRODUCTION A SOCIAL FUNCTION, 23\\nsibilities, and taken up a co-operative enterprise\\nthat can not be abandoned with safety to society,\\nand therefore marriage is enforced as an endur-\\ning contract. The contract is really between\\ntwo persons on the one side and the state on the\\nother. This view precludes divorce during the\\nchild-bearing and the child-rearing periods, except\\non the motion of the state or with its consent.\\nMarriage, in the usual sense of that term, thus\\nbecomes primarily a social institution, and has as\\nits motive a purposive co-operation. The whim\\nof the individual is subordinated to the needs of\\nthe society of individuals. Marriage becomes\\nwholly and utterly responsible. It remains for\\nthe individual under present conditions to choose\\nwhether or not he will undertake this social\\nfunction, but when the choice is once made, he is\\nbound, as an organ of society, to fulfill it with an\\neye to the social good.", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0027.jp2"}, "28": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER II.\\nTH:^ fittest SHOUI.D MARRY.\\nIF it be admitted that in human society repro-\\nduction is a social function, it follows that\\nthere must be certain principles which should\\nguide the individual in choosing whether or not\\nhe will volunteer to help propagate the race.\\nAnd as the individual responsibility for choice\\nin this matter can not rest on a freedom of\\nindifference/ marriage, under certain conditions,\\nis clearly a duty.\\nWe find that with the increase of civilization\\nand luxury the prudential check upon popu-\\nlation is more and more exercised by the most\\nintelligent classes of the people. With the\\nhigher education of women, it comes to pass that\\nthe choicest specimens of womanhood choicest\\nat least from the intellectual standpoint either\\ndo not marry at all or else marry comparatively\\nlate in life, after the best part of their nervous\\nenergy has been expended in study or in active\\nwork. Intelligent and progressive young men,\\nalso, feeling the pressure of the times for a more\\nexpensive standard of living, and recognizing\\nthe full responsibility of parents for the care of\\n24", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0028.jp2"}, "29": {"fulltext": "THE FITTEST SHOULD MARRY, 25\\ntheir children, hesitate long before they marry,\\nand when they do marry are careful to restrict\\nthe number of their oflfspring. It has now\\nbecome a familiar regret of sociological writers\\nthat the sturdy old New England stock is dying\\nout through its decreased marriage and birth\\nrates, and giving place to the prolific and uncul-\\ntured stock of French- Canadians who are taking\\npossession of New England.\\nA hundred years ago the famous English\\neconomist, Malthus, argued that the natural\\ntendency of population is to increase more\\nrapidly than the means of subsistence. Conse-\\nquentl}^ he urged, men ought to exercise pru-\\ndence and limit procreation so that the world\\nwould not be kept in constant misery by reason\\nof there being too many people in it for all to get\\na comfortable living.^\\nIf the Malthusian theory were unqualifiedly\\ntrue, and the duty which its recognition involved\\ncould be made to appeal to all men equally, then\\nthe plain obligation resting on society would be\\neither to select only the best-equipped men and\\nwomen for performing the function of reproduc-\\ntion, or else to carefully limit the number of\\nchildren allowed to each marriage. But ideals\\nof social duty do not appeal to all men with equal\\nforce. Only the most intelligent and those hav-\\ning the most lively consciousness of social needs", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0029.jp2"}, "30": {"fulltext": "26 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nwill respond to duties not yet embodied in law or\\ngeneral custom. The relations of the sexes are\\ndominated by such strong passions that society\\nas a whole can not put any effectual check upon\\nprocreation unless the policy to be adopted has\\nthe earnest support of a large majority of the\\ncitizens. The state can only require a low min-\\nimum of duty. It remains for the more ad-\\nvanced individuals to surpass this minimum in\\ntheir own lives, and to raise social ideals by con-\\nsistent practice and constant agitation.\\nWhat might we expect, therefore, to be the\\nconsequence of teaching the Malthusian doctrine\\nIgnorant and unthrifty people, unaccustomed to\\nlook at duty from a widely social standpoint, or\\nto forego a present satisfaction for a future good,\\nwould be last to hear and slowest to heed the\\nnew precepts. On the other hand, the few who\\nare most intelligent and most ambitious, would\\nbe the first to hear the doctrine and the readiest\\nto heed it. Some, being conscientious students\\nof social life, would be impelled by their sense of\\nduty to postpone marriage or not to marry at all.\\nWhile others, including most professional and\\nbusiness men, would be moved by their desire for\\nan expensive standard of living to have few\\nchildren even though this required the use of\\nillegitimate methods of limiting procreation. If\\nheredity and early environment count for any-\\nthing, this application of the Malthusian doctrine", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0030.jp2"}, "31": {"fulltext": "THE FITTEST SHOULD MARRY, ^7\\nwould mean that the intelligent, energetic, and\\nhighly conscientious classes would transmit their\\nqualities and their opportunities to a relatively\\nsmaller number of children than before. Mr.\\nGalton, in his book on Hereditary Genius,\\nhas shown that a stock whose members marry\\nearly and do not specially restrict the number of\\ntheir children will, in a few generations, enor-\\nmously outnumber a somewhat more prudent\\nstock. This means that the Malthusian doctrine\\nput into practice would defeat its own end and\\nmake its continued practice impossible by rapidly\\ndecreasing the proportion of prudent and well-\\nconditioned people in the world, leaving the\\nignorant, the vicious, and the unthrifty poor to\\npropagate the race.^ This process seems to be\\nactually going on in Europe and America, and it\\nis only through the beneficent influences of free-\\ndom, and the stimulation to improvement fur-\\nnished by a progressive ^ge, that the deterioration\\nof the race in these countries is not more gener-\\nally apparent.\\nThe limitation of population ought to begin\\nwith the unfit rather than with the fittest. In\\nthe light of recent industrial progress, and with\\nthe advance of scientific agriculture and the\\nhope that synthetic chemistry will some day\\nbe able to make our foods out of the original\\nelements,^ the limitation of the numbers of\\npopulation is seen to be a far less urgent neces-", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0031.jp2"}, "32": {"fulltext": "28 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nsity than the improvement of its character.\\nWith small families among the intelligent and\\nthe rich, both wisdom and wealth tend to become\\nconcentrated into the hands of a few. Great\\narmies of men fall out of work, and the people\\nof our cities suffer and almost starve when the\\ncountry is full of food. This condition would\\nbe impossible if society were rightly organized.\\nLeaders are what society needs. With a large\\nnumber of intelligent, progressive men, social\\norganization is kept flexible, and the circulation\\nof ideas and goods is provided for. Movement\\nis the chief enemy of distress. The prCvSsure of\\npopulation upon the means of subsistence will\\nresult far sooner from the concentration into a\\nfew hands of the opportunities of wealth and\\nleadership and the degradation of the masses\\ninto a condition of resourceless stolidity, than\\nfrom the mere increase of numbers. In America,\\nat least, we need not yet be troubled about a\\nlimit to the possibilities of the maintenance of\\na population which has in it a large class of re-\\nsourceful, socially conscientious men and women.\\nAs a result of these considerations it seems\\nclear that marriage and reproduction are a social\\nduty binding with special force upon all adults\\nnot obviously incapacitated, who have good\\nhealth, a sense of human obligation, and a belief\\nin their own fitness for parenthood. If we have\\nany ideal of social improvement, and unless we", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0032.jp2"}, "33": {"fulltext": "^v\\nTHE FITTEST SHOULD MARRY, 29\\nare ready to abandon society to the less fit, how\\ncan we escape from the obligation to do our part\\ntoward contributing healthy bodies, sane minds,\\nand a strong consciousness of duty to society\\nthat is, and that is to be Even if we were to\\ndeny heredity and prenatal influences altogether,\\nstill we could not escape from the fact that\\nreproduction is especially the duty of the well-\\noff, the gifted, the strong, and the conscientious;\\nfor there would remain all the influences of\\nhome life and home training, which indisputably\\nhave a far-reaching effect upon the character and\\nthe welfare of the next generation of adults.\\nWe rejoice that the trend of development is\\nupward, and that out of most unpromising sur-\\nroundings men of character and ability often\\nrise. We rejoice that education and culture are\\nin these late days being widely diffused among\\nthe masses of our people. We rejoice that the\\nhuman heart has become so tender, and the\\nhuman intelligence so keen, as to compel society\\nto care for the weak, and to acknowledge its\\nresponsibility for the helpless. But shall we not\\nstrive loyally to resist that tendency of civiliza-\\ntion which seems to be cutting off the flower\\nof humanity, and not only preserving the less\\nbeautiful and the less fit, but even handing over\\nto them the function of molding the character\\nof the future?", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0033.jp2"}, "34": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER III.\\nHINDRANCES TO MARRIAGE.\\nTHE conclusion that reproduction is a social\\nduty presumably binding upon all who are\\nfitted for it, and especially upon those who have\\nideals of social and individual betterment, will, I\\nfancy, strike many unmarried persons, especially\\namong women, as bitter irony. The state may\\ncall for volunteers, but two must volunteer to-\\ngether. For the mere physical act of propaga-\\ntion it would be a comparatively simple task\\nto select a partner, and would require no far-\\nreaching re-adjustment of individual life. But\\nthe social function involves much more. It\\nnecessitates the founding of a home, and the\\nconstant association of a man and a woman\\nthrough a long period of years. Society de-\\nmands of parents, not an embryo, but a fully\\ndeveloped, well-nourished, and highly educated\\nindividual, ready to take a place among the\\nadult workers of the world. This involves for\\nthe parents almost unlimited co-operation and\\nblending of lives. How, then, can anyone be\\nsure of finding a fit partner for this highest of\\nsocial functions Clearly, duty can not be bind-\\ning on one who has no opportunity to fulfill it.\\n30", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0034.jp2"}, "35": {"fulltext": "HINDRANCES TO MARRIAGE. 31\\nIf we are to require marriage of men and\\nwomen, we must prepare them for it, and make\\nit as easy as possible for them to mate properly.\\nHow far is this done under present conditions?\\nIn the first place, parents as a rule studiously\\nconceal from their children all knowledge of the\\nphysical functions of sex. From childhood boys\\nand girls are separated by shame. In some\\nparts of our own country and in most foreign\\ncountries they are kept apart in school. Many\\nof our higher institutions of learning are not co-\\neducational, and young folks who go away\\nfrom home to college are in this way frequently\\ncompelled to spend the best years for choosing\\ntheir mates in isolation from suitable companions\\nof the opposite sex. A young woman who goes\\nthrough a college or a normal school without\\nlaying the foundations, at least, of an association\\nwhich shall ripen into marriage, finds her oppor-\\ntunities for a suitable mating practically gone.\\nOur present social arrangements are not made\\non the theory that marriage is a duty. We have\\ntaken for granted rather that it is almost a ne-\\ncessity of nature, which is much more likelylto\\nurge itself upon young people prematurely than\\ntoo late or not at all. For this reason, and be-\\ncause we feel that the physical basis of marriage\\nis in fact sensual, degrading, and to be admitted\\nonly as a necessity of nature in mature Ufe, we", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0035.jp2"}, "36": {"fulltext": "3^ MTiiicAL Marriage,\\ndo what we can to keep the boys and girls from\\nknowing themselves and each other. Further-\\nmore, by rigid social customs and the scorn of\\npublic opinion, we prohibit young women from\\nactively seeking their mates. If, therefore,\\nthrough unfavorable conditions or unusual pru-\\ndence they have been prevented from forming\\nalliances until the first bloom of youth and\\nbeauty has begun to fade, their opportunities\\nhave often passed beyond recall. It is idle\\nto tell a young woman of twenty-five or thirty\\nyears that marriage is a duty, if you forbid her\\nby the most humiliating penalties to seek a part-\\nner for herself.\\nBut the most serious obstacle to the recogni-\\ntion of this duty as binding upon women is the\\nfact that, under the sanction of law and custom,\\nthe social function of reproduction is associated\\nwith other more individual and less responsible\\nactivities, which often frustrate the real purpose\\nof marriage. The fact is, that society has estab-\\nlished marriage in the law, and enforced the\\npermanence of the relation and the responsibility\\nof parents for their children, at considerable cost.\\nThe state has purchased the services of the in-\\ndividual by giving him a license for the indul-\\ngence of his passions. Many women who would\\ngladly participate in the propagation of the race,\\nenduring with joy the pains of child-bearing and", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0036.jp2"}, "37": {"fulltext": "nmnMN-cES TO marriage, 33\\nthe sacrifices of child-rearing, are not willing at\\nthe same time to yield themselves as the instru-\\nment for the gratification of a man s passions, or\\nto bear the physical burdens that the unlimited\\nindulgence of their own would bring upon them.\\nTo these women, marriage under conditions that\\nwould in their opinion make reproduction a real,\\nnot merely a nominal, service to society is im-\\npossible. And in so far as the state leaves duty\\nto the interpretation of the individual, the judg-\\nment of the individual must, of course, be the\\nultimate determining authority for his action.\\nIn asserting the duty of marriage we shall,\\ntherefore, be compelled to modify our formula to\\nmeet actual conditions. Whether or not it is a\\nwoman s duty to actively seek a marriage-mate\\nmust depend upon circumstances. If her seek-\\ning can be done without bringing upon herself\\nthe odium of public disapproval, she ought to\\nuse all her opportunities to secure a suitable\\npartner. There would be no gain, however, in\\nadopting such a course that her end would be\\ndefeated by the antipathy of society, even though\\nit were a foolish and unreasoning antipathy.\\nWomen must not, however, be too ready to\\nexcuse themselves from the duty of marriage.\\nIf they see the obligation of social service that is\\ninherent in the cherishing of a social ideal, they\\nought not to neglect, through slavery to mere\\n3", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0037.jp2"}, "38": {"fulltext": "34 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nconventionalities, the highest opportunity of\\ntheir lives. We may say, then, that well-devel-\\noped men and women who think themselves\\nfitted for parenthood are bound by their duty to\\nsociety to marry and procreate, if by circum-\\nstances or by reasonably persistent effort they\\ncan secure a good opportunity.\\nThere are many people to whom this duty will\\nnot appeal unless it can be definitely established\\nin terms of their own self-interest. So far, we\\nhave emphasized social duty as a motive to mar-\\nriage, because it ^3 too frequently left out of\\naccount. But this notive will not reach persons\\nwho, starting from the proposition that they\\nhave been brought into the world without their\\nconsent, and turned loose to look out for them-\\nselves, affirm that they are primarily responsible\\nto themselves and their own individual welfare,\\nsocial duty being incidental and subordinate. Or,\\naccepting the identity of individual and social\\ninterests, they may reach the easy conclusion\\nthat by devoting themselves wholly to self-real-\\nization they will in the end be rendering the\\nhighest service to society. This position rightly\\ntaken is practically unassailable. But may we\\nnot show that in most cases participation in the\\nfunction of procreation is an indispensable ele-\\nment in the highest possible self-fulfillment?\\nAlong with the idea that life is worth living goes", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0038.jp2"}, "39": {"fulltext": "m^-\\nHINDRANCES TO MARRIAGE. 35\\nthe other idea that the conditions of life can be\\nimproved by effort and adaptation. The doctrine\\nof evolution sets before us an ideal of indefinite\\nprogress. We think not only of the perpetua-\\ntion of the race, but of its improvement. If we\\nconceived it as possible that we in this genera-\\ntion could attain the goal of human development\\nwithout propagation, it is difficult to see how\\nmarriage could be enforced^ as a duty, either\\nsocial or individual. But ^ith the unlimited\\npossibilities of development x^hich are opened to\\nour view by the oontemplatiUn of the nature of\\nman and his environment, as^ already revealed in\\nnatural and human history, ^we have set before\\nus an ideal of individual and social life which can\\nonly be realized through a course of develop-\\nment reaching indefinitely into the future. Tho-\\nreau has beautifully said, The only excuse for\\nreproduction is improvement. Nature abhors\\nrepetition. Beasts merely propagate their kind;\\nbut the offspring of noble men and women will\\nbe superior to themselves as their aspirations\\nare.^\\nYoung people, full of the enthusiasm of self-\\nculture and free association, are sometimes led to\\noverestimate their possibilities of self-realization\\nwithin the span of their own lives, and also to\\noverestimate the hindrances to self-realization\\nwhich are necessarily attendant upon parent-", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0039.jp2"}, "40": {"fulltext": "36 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nhood. He is indeed a boldly optimistic man\\nwho can seriously believe himself capable of\\nreaching the acme of perfection in his own life-\\ntime. To most of those who have a high ideal\\nof individual human life, the possibility of pro-\\nlonging the process of improvement through an\\nindefinite number of generations, must form a\\nwelcome and altogether needful opportunity of\\nself-realization. Self-culture, if sought too\\neagerly and too individually, is like the mirage\\nof the desert. The means of self -culture are\\nsocial, and the experience of mankind as well as\\nthe instincts of the heart indicate that participa-\\ntion in home-making and the rearing of children\\nis one of the most potent means of character-\\nbuilding. IvCt not the enthusiasm of youth blind\\nthe eye of wisdom; for Nature has her seedtime\\nand her harvest, and when the harvest time has\\ncome, it is too late to sow the seed. One can\\nhardly conceive of any work that would stir the\\naspirations and satisfy the longings of the high-\\nminded, noble-hearted man and woman so thor-\\noughly as the culture of humanity in themselves,\\nand the transmission to the future of their high-\\nest individuality through reproduction and the\\ntraining of children to take their places.\\nSome may fancy that they can best transmit\\ntheir good qualities to society by their writings,\\ninventions, or Qther notable works during their", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0040.jp2"}, "41": {"fulltext": "mNDRAMCBS TO MARRIAGE, Zl\\nown lifetime. This may be true in a few cases\\nwhere individuals of high genius are so absorbed\\nin creative tasks that they have no time for fam-\\nily life.^^ But men are more important than\\nbooks; splendid women are more important than\\ncharitable foundations; healthy children are more\\nimportant than ingenious playthings; progress in\\nindividual self-control is more important than\\nforwardness in the conquest of nature; health\\nis more important than luxury. And for these\\nmost significant contributions to the welfare of\\nthe future, for these deepest impressions upon\\nthe character of the race, for these most direct\\ntransmissions of cultured individuality, procrea-\\ntion and family life are by far the most generally\\nefl cient means. Whether interpreted in terms of\\nsocial obligation or of individual self -fulfillment,\\nmarriage is an opportunity and a duty for those\\nwho are fitted for it.", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0041.jp2"}, "42": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER IV.\\nTHK FIT AND THK UNFIT.\\nTHE question now arises, Who are fit for\\nmarriage, and who are unfit We must\\nfirst consider fitness from the physical stand-\\npoint, for the primary element in reproduction is\\nphysical. It is conceivable that society should\\nset apart this function to a carefully chosen class\\nof the best fitted men and women, and that\\nchildren should be the wards of the vState in a\\nmuch more direct way than they are at present.\\nIn his ideal Republic, Plato instituted this\\ndivision of labor, and in the best days of Sparta\\nthe desire for the propagation of the fittest led\\nto the sanction of unions not strictly consistent\\nwith monogamy. In a society whose population\\nis to increase or even remain stationary, it is\\nphysically necessary that a large proportion of\\nthe people, certainly of the women, should par-\\nticipate in reproduction. And in default of ade-\\nquate state control of this function, and upon the\\nsupposition that the monogamic family furnishes\\nthe most efiicient means for the care and training\\nof children, procreation will be participated in by\\nthe majority of people of both sexes. The ques-\\n38", "height": "4432", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0042.jp2"}, "43": {"fulltext": "CTJPV\\nTHE FIT AND THE UNFIT 39\\ntion thus comes to be, not so much who are\\nespecially fitted for parenthood, as who are so\\nunfit that they should be excluded from it.\\nThere are certain evident disqualifications for\\nmarriage, which the state ought to define and\\nrigidly enforce. These are for the most part\\nconnected with the taint of hereditary disease.\\nOnly a year or two ago there was discussed in\\nthe Ohio I^egislature, a bill for the purpose of\\nestablishing examining boards to ascertain the\\nphysical fitness of all candidates for marriage.^*\\nIf the bill had become a law, no one considered\\nlikely to transmit insanity, consumption, or\\nsyphilis, would be licensed to marry in Ohio.\\nIt is evident; however, that in the present state\\nof public opinion, only the notoriously unfit can\\nbe prohibited by law from marrying. It remains\\nfor the individual to enforce upon himself the\\nduty not to marry if he is unfit for procreation.\\nReproduction being a social function and involv-\\ning the well-being of the offspring even more\\ndirectly than that of society at large, men and\\nwomen who are responsible will observe that\\nresponsibility is twofold. It urges them to\\nmarry if they are fit, it fortftds them to marry\\nif they are unfit. And the responsibility rests\\nupon the individual to raise the standard of\\nfitness above the bare minimum set by the state.\\nObviously people have no right to bring into the", "height": "4394", "width": "2618", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0043.jp2"}, "44": {"fulltext": "40 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nworld children foredoomed to disease and suflfer-\\ning, and unfitted for a successful struggle with\\nthe conditions of life. Generally, the individual\\nhas, or may have, the fullest knowledge of his\\nown physical fitness or unfitness for procreation.\\nWhat is urged here is that a young person con-\\ntemplating marriage, and, indeed, long before the\\ntime is ripe to form a marriage alliance, is in duty\\nbound to ascertain so far as possible what his phys-\\nical condition is, and what hereditary tendencies\\nto disease he carries with him; and to decide in\\nthe light of this knowledge whether or not he is\\nfit to reproduce his kind. If he finds himself\\nincurably unfit, it is as clear a duty as can be\\ndiscovered, to forego participation in the propa-\\ngation of the race. The social character of\\nreproduction makes it the duty of the individual\\nto bring his reason to bear upon the question of\\nhis own participation in this function, and to\\ndecide in accordance with his best knowledge\\nand his highest ideals, rather than satisfy him-\\nself with the performance of the low minimum\\nof duty required by the laws of the state.\\nHereditary disease is not the only disqualifica-\\ntion for procreation. A person with a deformed\\nbody or a weak constitution, who has no reason-\\nable prospect of being able to adequately care\\nfor offspring and give them a happy home,\\nought not to have children. Similar considera-", "height": "4412", "width": "2579", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0044.jp2"}, "45": {"fulltext": "\u00e2\u0080\u00a2X\\nTHE FIT AND THE UNFIT. 4 1\\ntions apply to the number of children which any\\nparticular couple should bring into the world.\\nNo woman has the right carelessly to break her-\\nself down by too frequent child-bearing. No\\nman has the right to make his own life not worth\\nliving by reason of the multitude of hungry\\nmouths at home which drive him into ceaseless\\ntoil, or urge him into dishonest methods of gain-\\ning a livelihood. On the other hand, too high a\\ndegree of physical fitness or of economic prosper-\\nity must not be required as a qualification for\\nmarriage. Perfect health is rare in both men\\nand women. The vices of civilization, the igno-\\nrance of physiological laws, and procreation by\\nthe unfit, have made us what we ought not to\\nbe. We hobble along through the world and are\\na rich prey to our fellows in the medical profes-\\nsion, when we are not too much disabled to earn\\nenough to pay our doctor bills. Even the best\\nequipped of us are not ideally fitted for propaga-\\ntion. We shall, therefore, have to be satisfied\\nwith a very moderate degree of fitness, and rely\\nupon the care of our bodies and the careful nur-\\nture and training of our children to supplement\\nfavorable hereditary tendencies and overcome\\nthose that are unfavorable. And, in truth, how-\\never much may be said of the importance of\\nheredity, it is certainly a fact that a rational\\nmode of life, especially when adopted in infancy,", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0045.jp2"}, "46": {"fulltext": "42 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\ncan accomplish wonders in behalf of health and\\nnappiness. Moreover, it should be recognized\\nas one of the most urgent obligations upon young\\npeople to prepare themselves for parenthood by\\navoiding all wasting of their energy, and by\\npersistently building up their health if it is\\ndoubtful or poor.\\nThe possession of considerable property or the\\nassurance of a large income is not so important a\\nqualification for marriage and reproduction as is\\nphysical health. A sensible man and woman\\ncan live together without any great increase in\\nnecessary living expenses as compared with pos-\\nsible earnings, and the rearing of one or even\\nseveral healthy children need not be so great a\\nburden as child-rearing usually is under our\\npresent wasteful modes of life. The opportunities\\nfor culture are becoming constantly more easily\\naccessible to the young through the bounty of\\nsociety at large. The most essential gifts left\\nfor parents to bestow upon their children are\\ngood health, affection, watchful care, and moral\\ntraining. lyuxuries and expensive pleasures are\\nnot wanted to make children happy and well-\\nfitted for social service.\\nWhile, therefore, both physical health and\\neconomic resources must always be large ele-\\nments in determining one s duty in reference to\\nreproduction, yet the primary qualification for", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0046.jp2"}, "47": {"fulltext": "THE FIT AND THE UNFIT. 43\\nmarriage is happiness and the capacity for\\nmakijQg one s children happy. The duty to\\nmarry and reproduce one^s good qualities in the\\nnext generation is thus incumbent upon those\\nwhose physical health does not fall distinctly\\nbelow the general average, and whose economic\\nprospects promise sufficient physical nourishment\\nand opportunity for sturdy intellectual and moral\\nculture for themselves and their children. If a\\nman is to perform any function of social service\\nwell, he must make up his mind to live simply,\\ntruly, and cheerfully He should limit his per-\\nsonal desires with reference to his social duties.\\nBut inability to be happy one^s self, and the\\nprobability of transmitting to offspring limita-\\ntions which would deprive their lives of useful-\\nness and joy, not only exempt a person from the\\nduty of procreation, but impose upon one the\\nduty not to procreate.\\nIt remains for us to examine those exemptions\\nfrom the duty of reproduction which arise from\\nthe consciousness of a paramount social obliga-\\ntion, a call to some distinguished service. Phys-\\nical reproduction is, doubtless, the primary fact\\nin the transmission of individual qualities of body\\nand mind. Family life is the primary fact in the\\ntransmission of healthful conditions, good habits,\\nand ethical ideals. But, without doubt, an indi-\\nvidual of exceptional ability may bring himself", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0047.jp2"}, "48": {"fulltext": "44 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nto bear upon the next generation in a much\\nwider, though somewhat less direct way, than by\\nthe procreation of children and the establishment\\nof a home. A Colonel Waring may introduce\\nsanitary reforms into a great city, which will\\nhave a direct and powerful influence for good not\\nonly upon the immediate environment of thou-\\nsands of homes, but also upon the ideals of the\\nchildren in them. A Walt Whitman may by his\\ndeathless songs celebrating the majesty of the\\nbody and the soul, no less than by^ the example\\nof a simple and unyielding life, inspire the\\nteachers of men for many generations. The\\npoets, the prophets, the social reformers, the\\nteachers of men, and the organizers of human\\neffort may act powerfully and directly in behalf of\\nthe manhood and the womanhood of the future.\\nAnd if their larger social service is really incom-\\npatible with marriage and procreation, the more\\ncircumscribed function must give way to the\\nbroader one. As a rule, however, the wider\\nservice can better be performed as an enlarge-\\nment of the narrower, not excluding it; or else\\nleft to those whose circumstances compel them to\\nforego the privileges along with the duties of\\nparenthood. Before anyone excuses himself from\\nmarriage on the plea that he has a wider social\\nfunction, let him make sure that he is not yield-\\ning to a selfish thirst for celebrity, or to the", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0048.jp2"}, "49": {"fulltext": "THE FIT AND THE UNFIT 45\\nnatural egotism of hopeful youth. I^et him also\\nmake sure that his avoidance of the limitations\\nand consequent opportunities of home-making\\nwill help and not hinder an efficient response to\\nthe demands of his higher calling.", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0049.jp2"}, "50": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0050.jp2"}, "51": {"fulltext": "II.\\nPREPARATION FOR MARRIAGE.\\nA love that doth not kneel for what it seeks\\nBut faces Truth and Beauty as their peer\\nA love that in its object find eth not\\nAll grace and beauty, and enough to sate\\nIts thirst of blessing, but, in all of good\\nFound there, sees but the Heaven-implanted types\\nOf good and beauty in the soul of man J*^\\nfames Russell Lowell y in Love,\\n47", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0051.jp2"}, "52": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0052.jp2"}, "53": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER V.\\nCURRKNT IDEALS.\\nTHE functions of the family are so delicate\\nand so important that their proper fulfill-\\nment would seem to demand a degree of wisdom\\nand self-restraint inconsistent with the narrow\\nexperience and the ardent passions of youth.\\nThe extraordinary importance of making a right\\nstart in life suggests the paradox that the\\nyounger we are, the wiser we need to be. This\\nis strikingly true with reference to sex functions,\\nfor wrong habits formed in mere childhood may\\nblight the whole of life, and children propagated\\nduring the hot days of youth can not be removed\\nto give place to the more excellent workmanship\\nof maturity. The paradox can be solved only\\nthrough education. The younger we are the\\nmore the wisdom of our parents should be put at\\nour command. Accurate knowledge of the func-\\ntions and responsibilities of sex should be im-\\nparted to children as soon as they have the desire\\nto learn or the capacity to understand. Parents\\nought to encourage children to preserve and pre-\\npare themselves for the great function of mature\\nmanhood and womanhood.\\n4 49", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0053.jp2"}, "54": {"fulltext": "50 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nThe current conception that marriage and pro-\\ncreation are matters of personal convenience\\nrather than of social duty, affects profoundly the\\npreparations usually made for entering upon\\nhome life. According to the customs of our\\ntime a young man s preparation for marriage\\ndoes not often begin until after he has fallen in\\nlove. It is supposed that he should make his\\nplans and attend to his business without refer-\\nence to marriage, with the tacit understanding\\nthat sometime or other love will steal upon him,\\nlike a thief in the night, and imperiously amend\\nhis plans. When a man is in love he is not con-\\nsidered strictly accountable for his actions. Neg-\\nlect of his regular work and forgetfulness of his\\nold friends are expected of him. The coming of\\nlove is a signal to him that he should begin to\\nthink of marriage. He is to seek the maiden of\\nhis choice, declare in extravagant terms that his\\nlife would be a blank without her, and beg her\\nto marry him. If she consents, he begins to\\nmake preparation for the wedding and the home.\\nBut chiefly he gives himself up to a freer and\\nmore constant enjoyment of his sweetheart s\\nsociety. They sit together and dream of the\\nfuture, or dote upon each other s faces. Seldom\\ndo betrothed lovers consider together the funda-\\nmental problems of the home, and especially do\\nthey avoid direct discussion of the relations that", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0054.jp2"}, "55": {"fulltext": "CURRENT IDEALS. 5 1\\nlead to propagation and the fulfillment of the pri-\\nmary social function of marriage.\\nOwing to the colossal fact of shame, based on\\nthe recognition that sexual relations are usually\\nsensual, few parents adequately instruct their\\nchildren. Often, in consequence of imperfect\\neducation and lack of frankness during court-\\nship, there is a total misunderstanding between\\na newly married man and woman on the most\\nfundamental conditions of their wedded life. It\\nis not easy to find words to adequately express\\nthe absurdity of customs and moral sanctions\\nwhich not only permit but almost compel silence\\nbetween a pair of lovers in regard to the essen-\\ntial relations of the most far-reaching co-opera-\\ntion into which two people can enter. The\\nnecessity for this silence lies not only in the\\nirresponsible character attributed to love, but\\nalso in the false notions of delicacy instilled into\\nthe minds of young women from earliest child-\\nhood.\\nA great deal is said about training girls for\\nmotherhood, and as a matter of fact, in some\\nold-fashioned households they are instructed in\\ndomestic science. It is usually considered a\\ndesirable thing for a woman to marry. She\\nis supposed to be better fitted for home-mak-\\ning than for anything else. And, indeed, her\\ncomparative physical weakness, and the hard-", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0055.jp2"}, "56": {"fulltext": "52 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nships which she often has to endure if she lives\\nan independent life, tend to make her lot,\\nif unmarried, less attractive than that of an\\nunmarried man. Moreover, a woman s instinct\\nfor motherhood, which is generally far stronger\\nthan a man s instinct for fatherhood, can not be\\nsatisfied without marriage. On the strength of\\nthCvSe considerations, most young women are\\nsupposed to be willing, perhaps anxious, to\\nmarry. They are not, however, permitted to\\nmake an intelligent search for a partner, and\\ntake the initiative in arranging the co-operation\\nnecessary for home-making.\\nA young woman is supposed to make no very\\npermanent or serious plans, but to busy herself\\nwith housework, or study, or art, or society, or\\neven with clerical work, until some man falls in\\nlove with her and proposes to her. Then she\\nhas the right to say yes or no, but is consid-\\nered foolish if she rejects a good offer. Her\\npreparation for marriage is largely made up of\\nwaiting. She is not even taught to save her en-\\nergy, and frequently fritters it away by unhealth-\\nful dressing, exposure, overwork, or unwholesome\\nsocial activities. No doubt great numbers of\\nyoung women are permanently injured by careless\\nor ignorant activity or by exposure at the periods\\nof menstruation. So-called modesty, instructed\\nby shame, is to blame for most of this waste of\\nwoman s powers.", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0056.jp2"}, "57": {"fulltext": "CURRENT WEALS. 53\\nThe fact can hardly be too much emphasized\\nthat shame is based on the conception of sex life\\nas sensual and evil, something to be hidden\\nand avoided in pure conversation. Even the\\ndiscussion of sex questions and more especially\\nallusions to them in conversation are generally\\nsuggestive of evil or folly. The knowledge\\nwhich can not be had through approved chan-\\nnels is secured secretly in discolored and pol-\\nluted fornT. Religion and morality prohibit the\\nfree discussion and the plain teaching of the\\nfacts of sex; but the prohibition prevents incal-\\nculable good while leaving evil to thrive in its\\nmost prolific soil. The result of these lawless\\nconditions is the most lamentable ignorance on\\nthe part of many young women, and the most\\nperverted knowledge on the part of many young\\nmen.-^\\nAfter a longer or shorter association with\\nmen in trivial conversation and giddy pleasures,\\nfollowed by the dreams and the insipidity of\\ncourtship, women generally sign the marriage\\ncontract with eyes unopened. When their fate\\nis irrevocably sealed, they often awake to find\\nthat the contract is a bitter and humiliating\\nfraud. The man sought the woman, drawn by\\nsexual desire, more or less refined. The woman\\naccepted the man, driven by the need of a home\\nand the longing for motherhood. The two have", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0057.jp2"}, "58": {"fulltext": "54 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nentered into a lifelong agreement which gives\\nthem a property right in each other s bodies. It\\nis no wonder that the great function of propaga-\\ntion is ill-performed, when we see men and\\nwomen, with no idea of their responsibility to\\nsociety, and urged by purely personal desires,\\npassing some months in idle talk and then sitting\\ndown to sip sweetness from each other s lips for\\nthe space of a honeymoon, while they heedlessly\\nand passionately project into the shadowy future\\nthe destinies of the race. Pray, what are men\\nand women? Are they nothing but the wanton in-\\nstruments of nature to keep the race alive on the\\nearth? Have they no will Have they no duty\\nHave they no opportunity for a better life than\\nthe satiating life of the senses", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0058.jp2"}, "59": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER VI.\\nMOTIVES FOR MARRIAGK.\\nTHE idea that procreation is a social function\\nand that marriage is an altogether respon-\\nsible relation unerringly condemns the most\\ngenerally received methods by which the sexes\\ncome together for family life. In former times\\nand in other countries marriage has been consid-\\nered a responsible social institution. Giddings,\\nthe distinguished sociologist, finds three princi-\\npal stages in the social evolution of the family.\\nIn the first stage, well represented by ancient\\nRoman and modern Japanese families, marriage\\nis determined by religious and property considera-\\ntions. Ancestor worship and the existence of a\\nfamily cult make it imperative that every man\\nshould have a son to celebrate his funeral rites\\nand maintain the family worship. If a man\\nfails to have a son of his own blood, he is careful\\nto adopt one. Furthermore, the patriarchal\\ndomain and the household goods are handed\\ndown from father to son, so that the institution\\nof inheritance furnishes a second motive for\\nmarriage and procreation. Marriage is not a\\nmatter of free choice at all; but, being an insti-\\n55", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0059.jp2"}, "60": {"fulltext": "56 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\ntution with a distinctly recognized social purpose,\\nthe patriarch himself chooses a bride for his son\\nand gives his daughter in marriage.\\nIn the second stage, which is represented by\\nthe current family relations of western Europe\\nand America, marriage is, from the social stand-\\npoint, irresponsible. It is a free compact made\\nbetween the parties directly concerned, and\\ndetermined chiefly by the accident of so-called\\nlove, with little reference to fitness for co-opera-\\ntion in a home. The traditions of religious-\\nproprietary marriage still persevere, and are\\ninfluential in limiting freedom of choice; but\\nlove, an emotional relation, quite mysterious and\\nindependent of conscious purpose, is at the pres-\\nent time recognized as the true motive force in\\nmarriage. This is the romantic stage in the\\nevolution of the family.\\nBut there is a third stage, which has its begin-\\nnings in the present, and which is destined in the\\nfuture to restore to the family the character of\\na responsible social institution, without taking\\nfrom it the freedom of choice and the sentiment\\nof love that characterize the romantic marriage.\\nThe new family is to be founded on love, intelli-\\ngence, and duty, and its central purpose will be\\nthe desire of men and women to reproduce and\\nperpetuate their own peculiar traits where these\\ntraits are deemed of superior social value, lu", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0060.jp2"}, "61": {"fulltext": "MOTIVES FOR MARRIAGE, 57\\n/other words, those who believe in themselves\\nand their ideals will recognize marriage and pro-\\ncreation as a duty which can be fulfilled only\\nthrough the ministry of love and comradeship.\\nGiddings thus describes the ethical family\\nThere is no radical cure for degeneration but\\na pure and sane family life, which disciplines the\\nwelcome and untainted child in the robust virtue\\nof self-control, and an unswerving allegiance to\\nduty. Here and there a family of the ethical\\ntype may at present be discovered. The ethical\\nfamily differs as much from the romantic family\\nas the romantic family differs from the religious-\\nproprietary family. To perpetuate a patrimony\\nand a faith, the religious-proprietary family\\nsacrificed the inclinations of individuals. To\\ngratify the amatory preferences of individuals,\\nthe romantic family has sacrificed patrimony and\\ntradition; of late, it has even gone to the ex-\\ntremity of sacrificing children. The ethical\\nfamily sacrifices individual feelings only when\\nthey conflict with right reason or moral obliga-\\ntion, but then it sacrifices them without hesita-\\ntion. It regards a genuine love as the most\\nsacred thing in the world except duty, but duty\\nit places first, and in the list of imperative duties\\nit includes the bearing and right training of\\nchildren by the vigorous and intelligent portion\\nof the population/", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0061.jp2"}, "62": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER VII.\\nIvOVK AND FRIENDSHIP.\\nACCEPTING the ethical family as the ideal\\ntype toward which we shall persistently\\nstrive, we must at the outset consider what are\\nthe necessary qualifications that fit two people\\nfor co-operation in home-making. We have\\nalready referred to certain individual disqualifica-\\ntions which impose celibacy as a duty upon those\\ndisqualified by them. We have now to ask in\\nregard to the principles in accordance with which\\na man and a woman, each being individually\\nfitted to participate in reproduction, may deter-\\nmine whether or not they are fitted to reproduce\\ntogether.\\nThe first requisite for intelligent and happy\\nco-operation in the work of marriage is friend-\\nship. According to Emerson, the principal\\nelements of friendship are tenderness and truth.\\nThese are certainly indispensable; and they\\ninvolve community of ideals, for, without that,\\nsympathy is superficial and the utmost sincerity\\nis impossible. Friendship fills the background\\nof all true love, and those lovers who are unac-\\nquainted with friendship s austere sincerity are\\n58", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0062.jp2"}, "63": {"fulltext": "LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP, 59\\nin the thrall of animal passion. Marriage is a\\npermanent companionship for purposeful work\\nand healthful play_, and it is idle to enter into it\\nunless the parties to it are moved by the strong\\nforce of tested and faithful friendship.\\nlyife is not a mere holiday. We can not drift\\nalong in the enjoyment of love forever. Every\\nact of our lives has some bearing on the future.\\nThe passion for exclusive possession that makes\\nyoung men and maidens oblivious of duty when\\nmonopolizing each other s attention, and madly\\njealous at other times, is not love. Jealousy is\\nsaid to be a proof of love. It is rather a proof\\nof passion, and of the absence of pure love.\\nWhat kind of a love is it that takes possession\\nof a man s fancy and makes him incapable of\\nloving all noble men and women Why should\\nnot the unselfish and ardent affection of a man\\nfor one woman prompt his heart to love woman-\\nhood wherever its grace and tenderness are mani-\\nfested Why should not a woman s love for one\\nman make her more generous toward other men\\nDesire is limited and exclusive; but friendship is\\nits own reward.\\nThe world s literature is full of the poetry of\\nlove. The doctrine of irresponsibility is written\\nin bold letters on the pages of poetry and fiction.\\nThe novel is the source of most young people s\\nideas of love, and in novels the curtain falls when", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0063.jp2"}, "64": {"fulltext": "6o ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nthe happy pair are united at the altar. Mar-\\nriage is pictured as the goal of life, with the dim\\nsuggestion that the years beyond are full of sat-\\nisfied love, and the home thronged with happy\\nchildren. We read stories for pleasure, and to\\nplease us the novelist stops short of the trage-\\ndies of married life. This is not, of course, uni-\\nversally true, but in general the failures of home\\nlife find their place at the beginning of the tale\\nand do not seem to be prophetic of similar fail-\\nures in the married life of the young people\\nwhose love-story forms the basis of the plot.\\nMost novelists leave their readers with quickened\\nimaginations, but with little additional wisdom.\\nThe gulf between the real and the unreal has\\nwidened, and the bridge built to span it has no\\nfoundation in the firm ground of fact. In reality,\\nmarriage is not a goal, but a first step, a be-\\nginning in an earnest and lifelong work. The\\nlove that has its beginning in a glance at a pretty\\nface or a manly form is no preparation for mar-\\nriage. Our friendships hurry to short and\\npoor conclusions, because we have made them a\\ntexture of wine and dreams, instead of the tough\\nfiber of the human heart. Only the faithful\\nfriendship born of the same ideals, and cultivated\\nthrough a period of mutual helpfulness and sin-\\ncere association, can furnish an adequate basis\\nfor the work of marriage.", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0064.jp2"}, "65": {"fulltext": "LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP. 6l\\nMany people insist that there is and ought to\\nbe an irrational element in love, in spite of which,\\nor on account of which, love is sacred and su-\\npreme. There is, perhaps, in every friendship\\nan element that we can not thoroughly explain.\\nBut love between the sexes, even in its highest\\nform, is nothing more than friendship with sex-\\nual attraction added. And it is to this addi-^\\ntional element that reference is usually made in\\ndiscussing the irrational character of love. In\\ntruth, there is a law of love. Men and women\\nwere made for each other, and, given common\\nideals and a common purpose, they need only to\\nput themselves under favorable conditions, and\\nlove will come as surely as good seed will grow\\nin warm, moist soil.\\nIf there is to be an irrational element in love,\\nlet it be in that part of love which is friendship.\\nNevertheless, friendship can be accounted for.\\nThe community of interest and the fitness for\\ncooperation existing between friends are not\\nfounded on caprice. There is no doubt that pos-\\nsible friendships are hidden all around us and\\nnever come to light because we do not cultivate\\nsincere acquaintance with our fellows. Moved\\nby uncontrolled impulses or selfish desires, we\\nassociate with each other superficially and when\\nit suits our immediate demands for company or\\nforgetfulness. Friendship caix b^ ctiltivated,", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0065.jp2"}, "66": {"fulltext": "62 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nWhat we need to insist on is that irresponsible\\nlove is no excuse for marriage. It is rather an\\nindication that the lovers are not yet, and per-\\nhaps never will be, fitted for home-building.\\nFriendship and love, as qualifications for mar-\\nriage, may be sought and found. lyove is not\\nan accident. Its fruition should be the control-\\nling purpose of one s life. Jealousy is an indica-\\ntion of fear and a selfish passion for possession.\\nThe high duty to which men and women are\\ncalled by society at large as well as by the condi-\\ntions of their own self- fulfillment, demands that\\nthey should not worship each other or abandon\\nthemselves to the enjoyment of selfish pleasures;\\nbut that together they should worship the ideal,\\nand through their association strive loyally to\\nfurther the realization of the true, the good, and\\nthe beautiful in the world.\\nFriendship is an intellectual relation and in-\\nvolves full communication between the friends.\\nThe work of procreation is the divinest work of\\nman. It is the work of race development. For\\nits best accomplishment it demands the highest\\npowers of the body and the mind, and the fullest\\nco-operation of the sexes. There must be an\\nintellectual and spiritual fitness or interfunction-\\ning between the married couple. Some ideal-\\nistic and passionate natures demand that the\\nlover be supremely strong and beautiful in his", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0066.jp2"}, "67": {"fulltext": "Love and friendship. 63\\nactual personality, and that in the co-operation\\nof love there be no painful hewings-down of the\\nrough corners of character; that, in brief, the in-\\nterf unctioning of love be effortless, painless, and\\nirresponsible. In their analysis of love they say\\neven that the little habits and tricks, the blun-\\nders and limitations of the loved one, annoying\\nor even offensive to other companions, should\\nbe dear and perfect and beautiful to the lover.\\nThey say that lovers should find in each other\\nthe satisfaction of every want, that they should\\n**live and move and have their whole being in\\neach other. Under this conception of love,\\nfriendship for others, the approval of others,\\nduty to the future, memories of the past, would\\nall be indifferent to the two persons totally en-\\ngulfed in each other. Recognizing that these\\nconditions are impossible of fulfillment for the\\nfull period of legal marriage, some persons reject\\nmarriage altogether as immoral, as a prostitution\\nof their individuality, as counter to the laws of\\ntheir own life.\\nNo one can consistently hold this view who is\\nnot entirely satisfied with himself. The demand\\nthat perfect spiritual, intellectual, and physical\\ninterfunctioning shall be the sole condition upon\\nwhich I will consent to co-operate with another\\nfor the fulfillment of my own life and the perpetua-\\ntion of the race, is based upon an unconsciously", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0067.jp2"}, "68": {"fulltext": "64 ETHICAL MARRIAGB.\\nexaggerated estimate of my own character. It\\nis as much as to say to my would-be mate, Lover,\\nI am perfect. I have no limitations. I need no\\nculture. I can fulfill myself apart from you. If\\nyou desire to be my co-worker you must be\\nutterly fitted to me as I am. You must ask of\\nme no sacrifice of my minutest desires. You\\nmust in every moment of our life together want\\nwhat I want, and do what I do, and think what\\nI think. If I wish to suffer pain for you, it shall\\nbe so; but in no respect shall your will limit my\\ndesire. My individuality shall not be disturbed,\\nbut we shall be one and inseparable. This is\\nidealized self-love, not rational self-realization.\\nIn the preparation for marriage the lover\\nshould demand most of himself, remembering\\nthat, like **the mote that is in thy brother s\\neye/ the limitations he discovers in his friend\\nare, quite possibly, his own. The essence of\\nrational love is that it should be exacting in its\\ndemands upon itself, and shrink from no pain or\\nwearying effort calculated to make it generous\\nand strong. It is, after all, more important to\\nme that. I should be worthy of receiving love\\nthan that my companion should be worthy of the\\nlove I bestow. How pitiable it is to hear a lover\\nboast of his sweetheart, or a maiden of her lover!\\nHow thinly veiled is the egotism and the self-\\npraise! Too often the character of the boaster is", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0068.jp2"}, "69": {"fulltext": "LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP, 65\\na silent argument against the boast. Even in\\nthe co-operation of marriage, individualities are\\nnot so completely merged as to destroy individ-\\nual responsibility.\\nA woman who in her passionate idealism had\\nrejected a marriage upon the basis of a com-\\nmon purpose merely, and of mutual adaptation\\nto that purpose, at a later time defended her\\naction in the following words I might have\\nmarried upon this basis when I planned to do so,\\nand now been fighting against a secret contempt\\nfor the man whose face I was to see across from\\nme at the table three times a day for innumera-\\nble weeks, and uncounted months, and eternal\\nyears! There would be hideous things in my\\nmind into whose faces I dared not look. I should\\ncringe before my own unformulated thoughts.\\nI should be living a dastardly, craven, self -de-\\nstroying life. This is, no doubt, a true picture\\nof the married life of all too many women. But\\nwhat is the trouble? Clearly these marriages\\nwere not formed upon the basis of a common\\npurpose, and of mutual adaptation to that\\npurpose. They were founded upon an irre-\\nsponsible passion which took no adequate ac-\\ncount of mutual fitness and of the rigorous\\nself-discipline necessary for co-operative action.\\nThey did not count the cost of sinewy love.\\nIt is useless to expect complete interfunction-\\n5", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0069.jp2"}, "70": {"fulltext": "66 ETHtCAL MARRIAGE,\\ning between two people in the early days of their\\ncompanionship. To shrink from marriage be-\\ncause of the inevitable readjustments of habit\\nincident upon the establishment of home life is\\nnot a brave way to enter upon the double work\\nof social fulfillment and self-realization. It is a\\nconfession of arbitrary individualism, that, if\\ncarried out in all lines of life, would make society\\nimpossible and subject man to the caprice of\\nan unregulated environment. Complete spirit-\\nual interfunctioning can not, from the nature\\nof the case, exist between a man and a woman\\nuntil their relations have been enriched by com-\\nplete physical interfunctioning; for the unity of\\nthe work of their bodies reacts upon and intensi-\\nfies the unity of their intellectual and emotional\\nlives.\\nIt is safe for another reason also, to enter\\nupon marriage without a complete conjunction\\nof the inner life. lyOve is not a caprice, and we\\nhave no reason to fear that we are groping in a\\nblind alley simply because we can not see the\\nend of the street we are traveling. If the first\\nand succeeding steps are rightly taken, the goal\\nof life will be reached at the end of married life,\\nrather than at the beginning; and no amount\\nof demonstrative or persistent passion before\\nmarriage can insure a happy home, unless the\\nlovers take every step in their co-operative", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0070.jp2"}, "71": {"fulltext": "LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP, 67\\nlife responsibly and in accordance with right\\nreason. Therefore we may safely say that the\\nbest qualification of two persons for marriage\\nis the ideal of self-culture and the disposition\\nto help each other in the attainment of well-\\npoised character, and at the same time to accept\\ncheerfully and unswervingly the social duties\\ninvolved in reproduction and family life.\\nThere must be in each of the parties to mar-\\nriage the capacity for appreciating the ideals,\\nthe efforts, the successes, and the limitations\\nof the other. The common purpose of procrea-\\ntion must include a whole philosophy of life, an\\nideal of improvement, and a method by which\\nthat improvement is to be secured. This is the\\nonly guaranty of that equal relationship between\\nthe home-makers which their task demands.", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0071.jp2"}, "72": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER VIII.\\nTun DUTIES OF COURTSHIP.\\nIF friendship is the necessary basis of true love,\\nthen it becomes clear that men and women\\nwho propose to marry must be free to discuss all\\nthe relations of marriage without reserve. And\\nif marriage is regarded as a purposive co-opera-\\ntion, it is hardly necessary to say that would-be\\nco-operators of ordinary common sense will be\\nprudent enough to formulate their plans and\\nexamine their mutual relations before entering\\ninto a binding contract. No marriage has the\\npromise of success unless the lovers are so con-\\nscious of the responsibility of the relation, and\\nso trustful of each other, as to be willing to\\nignore the barriers of so-called propriety and\\nreach an explicit understanding regarding the\\nrelations which shall obtain between them after\\nmarriage. The frank discussion of the sex-life\\nand the duties and responsibilities of parenthood\\nforms only the bare essential of the free com-\\nmunications of courtship. This precaution is\\nespecially necessary because of the false ideals\\nin regard to sex which are prevalent in society,\\nand because of the limited knowledge that par-\\n68", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0072.jp2"}, "73": {"fulltext": "THE DUTIES OF COURTSHIP, 69\\nents as a rule vouchsafe to give their children.\\nAnd even if this present evil condition were to\\nbe removed, failure on the part of lovers to dis-\\ncuss these matters, the most vital in their future\\nrelationships, would show an utter unfitness for\\nthe responsibility of reproduction. What good\\nreason is there for long hours of courtship and\\nt^oluminous letters of lovers, if they do not lead\\nto mutual understanding and rightly adjusted\\nrelations in anticipation of marriage Being\\nin love is no excuse for being puerile. Not that\\nlovers should keep their faces drawn and always\\ndiscuss solemn subjects, but that they should\\nassociate healthfully and with some reference to\\ntheir future. Indeed, the exigencies of purpose-\\nful marriage require that young men and women\\nshould be free to discuss the relations of sex\\nwith each other even though they are not\\npledged to marry.\\nThe main preliminary qualifications for mar-\\nriage are health, friendship, capacity for love,\\ncommunity of ideals, freedom of communication,\\noneness of purpose. Little needs to be said here\\nabout the more external qualifications. It is of\\ngreat importance that those who are to unite in\\nreproduction should have attained about the\\nsame stage in their mental, spiritual, and phys-\\nical development.^^ Although this is not a mere\\nmatter of age, the marriage of an old general to", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0073.jp2"}, "74": {"fulltext": "yo ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\na blooming society girl of twenty years is cer-\\ntainly absurd, save from the point of view that\\na girl is justified in bartering her body for a dis-\\ntinguished name and a place in the public eye.\\nIn regard to wealth, education, and social stand-\\ning, no universal rule can be laid down. Yet if\\nall things are equal, persons whose opportunities\\nfor culture and standards of living have been\\nmuch the same can best make the readjustments\\nnecessary for the co-operative work of home-life.\\nFitness for each other, intellectual, spiritual, and\\nphysicial, should nevertheless override the acci-\\ndental barriers of possessions and opportunities.\\nNo rule is likely to work well when applied to\\nthe marriage of a pauper or a millionaire. In\\nmost cases such persons would do well to live\\ncelibate lives and bequeath their poverty or their\\nriches to the state.\\nIt follows from what has been said of the\\nqualifications for marriage that no alliance can\\nrightly be made until the lovers have discussed\\ntheir fitness for co-operation and the conditions\\nupon which they can unite their lives without\\nsacrificing their ideals. It is, therefore, clear\\nthat a proposal to marry should be simply a pro-\\nposal to consider the question. No man can\\nrightly offer himself unconditionally, and no\\nwoman can accept an offer unconditionally. It\\nis rationally impossible for a man to make up", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0074.jp2"}, "75": {"fulltext": "THE DUTIES OF COURTSHIP, 7 1\\nhis mind fully that he wishes to marr} a particu-\\nlar woman without ever having said a word to\\nher about it, and then propose to her, leav-\\ning her to think it over by herself and answer\\n^^yes* or no/\\nNevertheless, even a proposal to discuss the\\nquestion should not be lightly made; for many\\npeople who might have a temporary liking for\\neach other would be unable to understand each\\nother s point of view in a personal discussion of\\nmarriage. Freedom of discussion does not mean\\nlicense for irresponsible and trivial discussion.\\nSome advisers of young women have warned\\nthem to treat a proposal of marriage with kind-\\nness and dignity, because it is the highest com-\\npliment a man can pay a woman. Whether or\\nnot it is a compliment depends upon the char-\\nacter of the man. To say I love you is far\\nmore uncertain praise than to say I believe in\\nyou. No responsible lover will urge his plea\\nfor a pledge of marriage by passionate and per-\\nsistent assertions that he is hopelessly in love.\\nRather, I offer myself faintly and bluntly to\\nthose whose I effectually am.\\nIn courtship there is no excuse for any other\\nthan a generous rivalry. Love can not well be\\nbound by fetters. The free man is a better\\nworkman than the slave. No one needs to\\nthrow a noose about the neck of love. In the", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0075.jp2"}, "76": {"fulltext": "72 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\ncourtship of equals seeking to be mated in the\\nway best suited to the performance of social\\nduties, there would be no obstacle to freedom of\\ninitiative on either side. Even now women are\\nfree to cultivate the acquaintance and friendship\\nof men in social life. And when marriage is\\nconsidered a legitimate topic of conversation\\nbetween them, something to be discussed as\\nsensibly as any other great social question, it\\nwill not be necessary for the eager maiden to sit\\ndreaming of the happy but uncertain day when\\nthe prince of her life will come but she can be\\nlooking for him among her companions and\\nfriends.\\nMany women who would be glad to make\\nready for marriage, but who feel the heavy hand\\nof social custom forbidding them to seek a life-\\ncomrade, miay think that the realization of\\nwoman s freedom in courtship is a mere dream.\\nFrom childhood her ideas of love have been\\nperverted by cheap fiction. But if a girl could\\nfree herself from this false instruction at the age\\nof sixteen or eighteen, and make up her mind to\\nact naturally in her relations with men, there is\\nlittle reason to believe that she would even now\\nbe seriously limited in her freedom to seek per-\\nmanent association. The trouble is that her\\nideas of freedom and the way of realizing them\\nthrough honest communication and sincere friend-", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0076.jp2"}, "77": {"fulltext": "THE DUTIES OF COURTSHIP. 73\\nships do not usually come until she has missed\\nthe best opportunities of her life. The respon-\\nsibility, therefore, rests upon parents, teachers,\\nand other experienced friends, to suggest to\\nyoung girls the principles upon which preparation\\nfor marriage should be based in order that\\nresponsible freedom of action may take the place\\nin their lives of irresponsible waiting.\\nThere are persons who object to long engage-\\nments but with the certainty that many mis-\\ntakes will be made in first love, the choice of a\\nmate should not be made irrevocable until it has\\nstood the test of considerable time. Moreover,\\nprocreation should not be undertaken until men\\nand women have reached maturity. And although\\nthere is no objection to the marriage of a self-\\ncontroUed couple several years before they are\\nready to have children, yet, if they are able to\\ncontinuously prepare themselves for fatherhood\\nand motherhood without marrying early, it\\nwould often be the part of wisdom to postpone\\nentering into the legal contract until their prepa-\\nrations are nearly complete. The objection to\\nlate marriages, that habits of life have become\\nfixed and readjustments are difficult, would have\\nlittle force if the conduct of life during the\\nwhole period of young manhood and young\\nwomanhood were consciously guided by the ideal\\npf expected marriage and family-Ufe.", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0077.jp2"}, "78": {"fulltext": "74 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nThe procreation of children is no more a\\nmystery than is the growth of plants. Marriage\\nought not to be an eye-opener to the purest\\nwoman or the most austere man. One of the\\nstrongest incentives to sexual desire among young\\npeople is the curiosity to see the parts of the\\nbody that are usually concealed, and to know the\\nfacts of life that are not openly discussed. And\\nno doubt the excessive passion that is usually\\nindulged by newly married people results for the\\nmost part from the reaction attendant upon a\\nsudden change in the degree of their intimacy.\\nIt will hardly be denied, even by those who are\\nunwilling to acknowledge social duty as para-\\nmount in marriage, that every reasonable means\\nshould be used to bring passion under control.\\nIt is recognized that sexual desire as a domi-\\nnating, sensualizing force is the bane of civilized\\nnations, and threatens the permanence of race\\nimprovement. It is a well-known fact that the\\nentrance upon married life is often attended by\\nexcesses which turn hope into dread, affection\\ninto disgust, and health into sickness and ex-\\nhaustion; yet there is generally no attempt made\\nin the preparation for marriage to avoid these\\nincidents. Can there be imagined a more fool-\\nhardy way of dealing with the conditions of self-\\ncontrol than by passing from a reserved courtship\\ninto the closest physical intimacy in a single day", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0078.jp2"}, "79": {"fulltext": "THE DUTIES OF COURTSHIP, 75\\nIn default of careful and full instruction in\\nthe forms and functions of sex during childhood,\\nevery young person, when he comes to the age\\nof self-government, ought to set about acquiring\\nfrom pure and scientific sources the knowledge\\nso much needed as a preparation for marriage.\\nThe most important preparation for marriage\\nis self-training in high ideals. It would be folly\\nto permit great intimacy between lovers if their\\nminds are constantly dwelling upon the indul-\\ngence of sensual passion as the ideal of married\\nlife. With such an ideal no man or woman has\\nany moral right to marry or to cultivate friendly\\nassociations with persons of the other sex. If\\nmarriage is impure and sensual, let us have none\\nof it. But if life is a good, and if procreation is\\na duty to society, if the building of a home is a\\nsocial function, then let us be free from sensual\\nideals and the false limitations that they put\\nupon us. Especially let us not, in the name of\\nvirtue, recklessly enter upon marriage with no\\nideal of self-control, no training for it, and no\\npreparation for meeting the temptations which\\na sudden change in intimacy under the legal\\nimmunity of the marriage ceremony inevitably\\nbrings.\\nThe consummation of the preparations for\\nmarriage is often an elaborate ceremonial, an\\nexpensive wedding-feast, and the formal an-", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0079.jp2"}, "80": {"fulltext": "76 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nnouncement of the entrance upon wedded life.\\nThis celebration, as marking a great epoch in\\nthe lives of both parties, and especially of the\\nwoman, takes place everywhere among the races\\nof mankind. The founding of a home is certainly\\nan occasion of primary importance to the two\\npersons directly associated, as well as to society\\nat large. It is the occasion, if rightly considered,\\nwhen two friends, having thoroughly tested their\\nfitness for co-operation, inscribe their names on\\nthe roll of volunteers for the work of perpetu-\\nating and fulfilling the life of the state and of\\nhumanity. Unfortunately, the celebration of this\\nevent is usually conducted in a way not calcu-\\nlated to keep clearly before the volunteers the\\nnature of the duties they are called upon to per-\\nform. The ceremony itself is generally so worded\\nas to convey the idea that the woman is enlisting\\nin the service of the man, while he binds himself\\nto treat her kindly, to love no other woman, and\\nto supply her with the goods of this world. The\\nwording is perhaps of minor importance, but at\\nleast it ought not to contradict the social func-\\ntions of marriage and the ideal relations of man\\nand woman in the home. And the ceremony,\\nsymbolizing so happy and purposeful an enter-\\nprise, might well be a work of art, simple but\\ntrue and beautiful. There is no reason, either,\\nwhy a marriage supper with music and dancing", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0080.jp2"}, "81": {"fulltext": "THE DUTIES OF COURTSHIP, 77\\nshould not be given; but to load the table with\\ndainty and costly viands, pampering to the taste\\nand stimulating to the senses, is directly and\\ngrossly inconsistent with the healthful ideals of\\nduty and happiness that should be suggested on\\nthis, of all occasions. The marriage feast should\\nbe simple and strictly healthful. lyct the cere-\\nmony and the supper be surrounded with as much\\nbeauty as means will permit, provided that on no\\naccount it be made an occasion for the display\\nof wealth or pride or sensuous tastes. There\\nshould be no voluptuous music, no wasteful\\ndecorations, no absurd or sensual dressing.\\nThe whole celebration of marriage, except the\\nceremonial form required by law, may well be\\ndispensed with, if it is impossible to surround\\nthe wedding with the loyal fellowship of friends\\nwhose ideals are not sensual and irresponsible.\\nFormal marriage announcements are no more\\nessential than the wedding celebration. But if\\nthey are to be used, they should be sent only to\\nfriends who are known to cherish an ideal of\\npurity and purposeful association in marriage, or\\nthey should carry on their face an unmistakable\\nexpression of the ideals to which the uniting\\npersons acknowledge their allegiance. For, how-\\never much we may hesitate to admit it, the fact\\nremains that most people now cherish a sensual,\\nindividual ideal of marriage, and hardly see at", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0081.jp2"}, "82": {"fulltext": "78 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nall that social functioning should predominate in\\nit. That the expression of the ideals of an indi-\\nvidual couple at the time of their marriage is not\\nwholly impracticable is shown by the appearance\\nof the following words at the head of a marriage\\nannouncement not long ago\\nWe believe that I^ove is not the caprice of\\npassion.\\nWe believe that I^ife is the purpose, not the\\naccident, of lyOve.\\nTherefore, we, who love, join hands that in\\nus lyif e may increase and grow more beautiful.", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0082.jp2"}, "83": {"fulltext": "III.\\nTHE CONTROI. OF PASSION IN\\nMARRIAGE.\\nAmong savage peoples the phenomenon every-\\nwhere confronts us of wedded life without a grain of\\nlove. Love then is no necessary ingredient of the\\nsex relation; itisnot an outgrowth of passion.\\nOne day from its mother s very hearty from a shrine\\nwhich her husband never visited nor knew was there\\nwhich she herself dared scarce acknowledge, a child\\ndrew forth the first fresh bud of a love that was\\nnot passion^ a love that was not selfish, a love\\nthat was an incense from its Maker and whose\\nfragrance from that hour went forth to sanctify the\\nworld, Henry Drummond^ in the Ascent of\\nManr\\n79", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0083.jp2"}, "84": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0084.jp2"}, "85": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER IX.\\nA PROGRAM OF PROCREATION.\\nAT the time of marriage young people are\\nconfronted by new conditions. They have,\\nuntil then, been restrained from physical inti-\\nmacy by the strongest sanctions of religion and\\nmorality. But when the ceremony of marriage\\nis performed, all formal restrictions are removed\\nfrom the indulgence of their passions. They are\\nbrought into the new relation of sexual inter-\\ncourse.\\nThe normal result of the copulation of the\\nsexes is the impregnation of the female and the\\nbirth of a child at the end of the pregnant period.\\nThe birth of a child puts a serious limitation on\\nthe freedom of the mother during the child s\\ninfancy, and materially increases the father s\\neconomic responsibilities for many years. The\\nchild may grow up to be a distinguished citizen,\\nand render the highest social service; it may\\ncome to be a criminal or a pauper, and cause\\nsociety unmeasured expense and trouble: the\\nchances are, however, that it will become an\\naverage man or woman, and help to make up the\\nrank and file of citizenship. In any case, the\\n6 8i", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0085.jp2"}, "86": {"fulltext": "82 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\ncharacter of the new individual will have a far-\\nreaching effect upon the happiness and virtue of\\nother individuals, few or many. Thus conse-\\nquences of the most serious import to society-\\nfollow naturally and palpably upon a single act\\nof sexual union.\\nWe have already seen the social necessity for\\nreproduction. It follows that the seriousness of\\nthe act should not deter men from accepting the\\nresponsibility of procreation, but that they should\\naccept it intelligently and after due preparation\\nfor it. Marriage, as a social institution, has for\\nits primary purpose the propagation of human\\nlife. Under the conditions of life that obtain in\\nwell-settled communities, prudence would indi-\\ncate that a family should include from two to\\nhalf a dozen children. Seldom do parents want\\nmore than six. Seldom ought they to have fewer\\nthan two.^* It follows that according to nature s\\nlaw, sexual intercourse should be had at long\\nintervals and during a limited portion of adult\\nlife. This conclusion is so widely at variance\\nwith the practices of married life that it needs\\nto be stated more explicitly in order to be fully\\nunderstood. Put in the negative form, it means\\nthat there should be no intercourse except when\\nchildren are desired, and that at such times inter-\\ncourse should be limited to the reasonable needs\\nof its function. It should never take place", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0086.jp2"}, "87": {"fulltext": "A PROGRAM OF PROCREATION. 83\\nwhen the condition of the adults or their pros-\\npects for the future make offspring undesirable;\\nand never when impregnation is improbable, or\\nwhen the woman is already with child. In a\\nword, sexual intercourse should be for procrea-\\ntion only?^\\nThe intelligent fulfillment of the function of\\nmarriage requires that married people should\\nhave a program of procreation, and that every\\nact of intercourse should be deliberate and pur-\\nposive. In order to get the subject before us in\\nits details, it may be well to set forth here a pro-\\nposed course of action for married couples who\\nwish to become parents.\\nBefore procreation is actually undertaken, the\\nman and woman should have overcome the feel-\\ning of physical shame in each other s presence,\\nwhich, as a result of early education and the\\nconsciousness of sensual desires, is practically\\nuniversal between adults of opposite sex. The\\nwould-be parents ought further to be in good\\nhealth and loyally affectionate toward each other\\nat the time of procreation. I^et them choose the\\ntime of the year when propagation should begin,\\nand, all the conditions being fulfilled which make\\nthem immediately fit to co-operate in reproduc-\\ntion, they should have a single complete sexual\\ncongress. Time should then be given to ascer-\\ntain whether or not conception has taken place.", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0087.jp2"}, "88": {"fulltext": "84 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nNormally menstruation ceases during pregnancy.\\nIf the menses are not interrupted, the probabili-\\nties are strong that conception has not taken\\nplace, and that another copulation will be neces-\\nsary. Intercourse may take place once a month\\nuntil there is reason to believe that the woman is\\npregnant, or until the season favorable to repro-\\nduction has passed. After impregnation has\\nbeen secured there should be no more intercourse\\nuntil another child is desired.\\nTwo or three points in this program require\\nsome further explanation. If people undertake\\nparenthood as a social duty and as a means for\\nthe highest self-fulfillment, they can not look\\nupon each other s bodies with shame, or regard\\nthe necessary act of intercourse as degrading.\\nIt is, for this reason, important that procreation\\nshould not take place until husband and wife\\nhave become familiar with each other s bodies.\\nThe nervous shock of first intercourse is much\\ngreater when it is accentuated by the acute\\nsensation of strangeness usually accompanying\\nthe first physical intimacies of a man and a\\nwoman. If for no other reason, at least on\\naccount of the desirability of surrounding the\\nprocreative act with normal sentiments that\\nwill not embarrass the frank instruction of\\nchildren in sexual matters, the feeling of shame", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0088.jp2"}, "89": {"fulltext": "A PROGRAM OF PROCREATION^, 85\\nshould be entirely absent from the union of the\\nsexes for procreation.\\nThe time of year in which impregnation takes\\nplace is important, because it fixes the time of\\nchild-birth; and the usual illness of the mother\\non that occasion, and the welfare of the new-\\nborn babe are both more or less affected by the\\nseason. Few women would choose for their\\nconfinement the sultriest weeks of summer, or\\nthe raw and changeable days of November and\\nMarch. They would rather choose the pleasant\\nmonths of spring or early autumn, when the\\nweather is less capricious and early escape from\\nchild-bed to the open air is invigorating to both\\nmother and child. So much may be said for\\ngeneral differences in the seasons. Obviously,\\nthe opportunity to choose the time of child-birth\\nwould be of great advantage to innumerable\\nwomen who have to plan their work for more\\nthan one season ahead. It is altogether proba-\\nble that under normal conditions not more than\\none or two copulations would be required to\\ninduce pregnancy, and, therefore, that a choice\\nof the season for child-birth could readily be\\nmade.\\nThere seems to be some uncertainty about the\\nsigns of pregnancy during the few weeks im-\\nmediately following conception. This un-", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0089.jp2"}, "90": {"fulltext": "86 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\ncertainty is undoubtedly due in most cases to\\nabnormal conditions. A healthy woman whose\\ncondition has not been perturbed by the func-\\ntionless gratification of passion may be reason-\\nably assured that the cessation of the menses\\nafter intercourse means that she is with child.\\nFurther intercourse would not only be unnec-\\nessary but presumably injurious to the develop-\\ning embryo.\\nA program of action so utterly inconsistent\\nwith general practices and with most teaching on\\nthe subject of marriage, is certain to meet with\\nmuch vigorous opposition. Objections are raised\\nto the practice of continence in marriage on the\\nscore of health, pleasure, fulfillment of love,\\nand obedience to natural instinct. Before dis-\\ncussing these objections, it will be convenient\\nfor us to ask, What are the alternative courses\\nopen to married people who reject continence?\\nIf they do not accept a program similar to the\\none here advocated, what kind of a program do\\nthey propose to adopt?", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0090.jp2"}, "91": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER X.\\nAI^TERNATIV]^ TO CONTINENCE.\\nTHE alternatives to continence in marriage\\nmay be definitely stated as follows:\\n1 Sexual intercourse limited only by the lim-\\nits of passion, with procreation unregulated.\\n2. Sexual intercourse for pleasure Umited to\\nthe so-called safe periods, including the peri-\\nods of pregnancy and lactation, with intercourse\\nfor procreation when offspring is desired.\\n3. Sexual intercourse limited only by the limits\\nof passion, and undesired conception prevented\\nby the use of special devices; any chance impreg-\\nnation being accepted as an unavoidable misfor-\\ntune, or disposed of by abortion.\\n4. Sexual intercourse for love, unaccompanied\\nby the orgasm; procreation being intelUgently\\nregulated.\\nI. It is difficult to see how a mature person\\nwith any respect for himself or society, and with\\nany ethical consciousness, could ever deliberately\\nadopt or approve the program of unlimited indul-\\ngence. There is reason to believe, however, that\\nmany newly married couples, apparently intel-\\n87", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0091.jp2"}, "92": {"fulltext": "88 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nligent and conscientious, adopt precisely this\\ncourse. They pay the penalty in physical\\nexhaustion, in the uprooting of love, and in a\\nfamily of unhealthy children. No inconsiderable\\nnumber of women pay the penalty in death. One\\nauthor, speaking of unrestrained indulgence,\\nsays:\\nThe writer frequently meets among his\\nacquaintance married people who are visibly\\nsufferers from this cause. They are always ail-\\ning, the husband can not half attend to his busi-\\nness, he has a headache, or a fever, or a cold, or\\nsickness of the stomach, or bowel complaint; and\\nhis wife is more or less in the same condition.\\nThe close observer sees in their lusterless eyes,\\ntheir sodden and greasy faces, and their trem-\\nbling hands, evidences that an almost nightly\\nindulgence is kept up of the pleasures of the\\nmarriage-bed, which is the origin and cause of\\nall their ailings sapping, as it does, the very\\nfoundations of their vitality.\\nAnother authority, writing many years ago,\\nsaid:\\nThe married man who thinks that because\\nhe is a married man, he can commit no excess,\\nhowever often the act of sexual congress is re-\\npeated, will suffer as certainly and as seriously as\\nthe debauchee who acts on the same principle in\\nhis indulgences, perhaps more certainly, from his", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0092.jp2"}, "93": {"fulltext": "ALTERNATIVES TO CONTINENCE, 89\\nvery ignorance and from his not taking those pre-\\ncautions and following those rules which a career\\nof \\\\dce is apt to teach a man. Many a man has,\\nuntil he married, lived a most continent life; so\\nhas his wife. But as soon as they are wedded,\\nintercourse is indulged in night after night, nei-\\nther party having any idea that this is an excess\\nwhich the system of neither can bear, and which,\\nto the man, at least, is simple ruin. The prac-\\ntice is continued until health is impaired, some-\\ntimes permanently, and when a patient is at last\\nobliged to seek medical advice, he is thunder-\\nstruck at learning that his sufferings arise from\\nsuch a cause as this. People often appear to\\nthink that connection may be repeated just as\\nregularly and almost as often as meals may.\\nTill they are told, the idea never enters their\\nheads that they have been guilty of great and\\nalmost criminal excess; nor is this to be won-\\ndered at, as such a cause of disease is seldom\\nhinted at by the medical men they consult.\\nIn his Principles of Ethics Herbert Spencer\\ndiscusses in carefully chosen words the signifi-\\ncance of excesses in married life. He says\\nChronic derangements of health supervene,\\ndiminished bodily activity, decline of mental\\npower, and sometimes even insanity. Succeed-\\ning the mischiefs thus caused, even when they\\nare not so extreme, there come the mischiefs", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0093.jp2"}, "94": {"fulltext": "90 E;THICAL MARRIAGE,\\nentailed on family and others; for inability to\\ndischarge obligations, depression of spirits, and\\nperturbed mental state, inevitably injure those\\naround. Several specialists, who have good\\nmeans of judging, agree in the opinion that the\\naggregate evils arising from excesses of this kind\\nare greater than those arising from excesses of\\nall other kinds put together/\\nUnrestricted intercourse is so violently opposed\\nto individual welfare that the imperative demands\\nof health, and of pleasure itself, generally put\\nsome check upon the gratification of passion after\\nthe first few months of married life. But the\\ninequality of the burdens of sex, coupled with the\\ninequality of passion in men and women, very fre-\\nquently keeps the wife in a state of slavery to\\nher husband during the greater part of their\\nmarried life. This condition of affairs violates\\nthe laws of health, the laws of love, and the laws\\nof morals. Social functions, and even individual\\nwelfare are prostituted to the caprice of inordi-\\nnate passion. Children are brought into the\\nworld without welcome and with no inheritance\\nof health or of virtuous tendencies. Marriage\\nunder these conditions is utterly irresponsible\\nand immoral.\\n2. The manifest evil of the mode of life just\\ndescribed leads many married people how", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0094.jp2"}, "95": {"fulltext": "ALTERNATIVES TO CONTINENCE, Qt\\nmany no one can tell to bring the gratification\\nof desire within certain more or less definite\\nlimits. Physical exhaustion, and more especially\\nthe desire not to increase the size of the family,\\ninduce the regulation of intercourse. It is popu-\\nlarly believed that during a portion of each\\nwoman s month, most remote from the menses,\\nshe is barren, and that, accordingly, intercourse\\ncan take place at that time without danger of\\nundesired procreation. This period, extending\\nover a number of days, is known as the safe\\ntime, according to the phraseology of people who\\nseek f unctionless indulgence. The rule of limit-\\ning intercourse to a particular time in every\\nmonth may have proved in many cavSes an effec-\\ntive precaution against unwelcome child-bearing;\\nbut occasional failures prove that there is no\\ntime in the menstrual month when a woman can\\nbe absolutely sure of immunity from concep-\\ntion.^^ At best, every woman would have to\\nrun great risks in attempting to find out exactly\\nat what times in the month she is likely to be\\nbarren.\\nWhen the indulgence of passion is, fox pru-\\ndential reasons, limited to the **safe period,\\npregnancy and lactation are often made the\\noccasion for a much freer indulgence, because,\\nas is said, things can t be any worse. Indul-\\ngence at these times is so obviously unnatural", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0095.jp2"}, "96": {"fulltext": "9^ ETHICAL MA RR TAGS,\\nand so revolting to our ideas of decency that no\\ndiscussion of it would be required if the sexual\\nnature of woman were not said to furnish an\\nunique exception to the general nature of female\\nanimals. It is asserted, and apparently on good\\nauthority, that women are often much more pas-\\nsionate during pregnancy than at other times.\\nPregnant women, it is said, frequently have all\\nkinds of peculiar desires; and for the sake of\\nmother and offspring, it is contended, these\\ndesires should be satisfied whenever possible.\\nA case is recited of a worthless drunkard whose\\nmother, a pious Methodist, was seized during\\npregnancy with an almost resistless craving for\\nwhisky. Her desire was, however, repressed,\\nand as was said in after years, the unborn child\\nwas impressed with the mother s unsatisfied\\ncraving for drink. Unfortunately for the\\ntheory, this was not the only one of her sons\\nwho drank to excess. Such evidence as this,\\nbased upon untrained observation, does not go\\nfar to prove that unnatural desires on the part of\\npregnant women should be gratified. Such\\nsymptoms probably indicate that no adequate\\npreparation for child-bearing has been made, or\\nthat the woman is permar^ently unfitted for\\nmotherhood. It flies in the face of nature to\\nsuppose that a healthy woman, normally pre-\\npared for child-bearing, and giving due attention", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0096.jp2"}, "97": {"fulltext": "ALTERNATIVES TO CONTINENCE. 93\\nto her diet and her physical activities, should\\nexperience any marked desire for sexual inter-\\ncourse, or develop other unfunctional appetites,\\nduring pregnancy. Passion at that time must\\nrather be the outgrowth of habitual indulgence,\\nor the irritation caused by the growth of the\\nfcetus in the womb, and incorrectly translated\\ninto a desire for copulation; or, possibly, merely\\nthe reaction from aversion to intercourse when it\\nis likely to result in unwelcome child-bearing.\\nDuring the time of gestation and nursing the\\nmother needs all her surplus energy to minister\\nto the needs of her child. To waste this force\\nin the indulgence of passion is, from the indi-\\nvidual standpoint, miserably foolish, and from\\nthe social standpoint, hardly less than criminal.\\nIf no indulgence is allowed during pregnancy\\nand lactation, what are the objections to inter-\\ncourse during the regular safe periods? In\\nthe first place, as we have already noted, there\\nis no absolutely safe period, and the consequences\\nof procreation are so far-reaching, and the respon-\\nsibility of parenthood is so great, that people can\\nnot afford to run ayiy risk of undesired propaga-\\ntion, especially when all risk is avoided by simple\\nabstinence from a voluntary act.\\nFurthermore, we. should expect from nature\\nthat, if a woman is more likely to conceive at\\none time than at another, she would feel stronger", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0097.jp2"}, "98": {"fulltext": "94 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nsexual desire at that time. It is so with the\\nfemales of the lower animals, but it is claimed\\nthat woman differs from all other females in\\nbeing continuously susceptible to passion. So\\nfew women have the opportunity to choose when\\nthey will have intercourse that perhaps the\\nmajority of them are unable to determine\\nwhether or not their desire [shows periodicity.\\nSome, however, experience passion near the\\nmenstrual period, while they are indifferent or\\naverse to intercourse during the safe period.\\nThe whole question of the relative strength and\\npertinacity of the passions in the two sexes can\\nnot be accurately answered because of the preva-\\nlence of abnormal conditions. There is, how-\\never, a deepseated belief that women are less\\npassionate than men,^^ and this view seems to\\naccord with the results of biological investiga-\\ntions, in which the male element is described as\\nactive and seeking, while the female element is\\npassive and receiving. Although it is impossible\\nfor a scientist, to say nothing of a layman, to\\ndogmatize in regard to the general facts of pas-\\nsion in the human species, it seems safe to say\\nthat on a priori grounds we should expect\\nwoman s passion to be more or less periodic, and\\nto be strongest when she is readiest for impreg-\\nnation. Thus, reason and experience, so far as\\nthey go, indicate that sexual intercourse at a time", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0098.jp2"}, "99": {"fulltext": "ALTERI^ATIVES TO CONTINENCE, 95\\nwhen conception is not likely is indifferent or\\npositively distasteful to woman. We have in\\nthis fact a most important reason for condemning\\nthe rule of married life here under discussion.\\nLove ought to be essentially equal. The woman\\nwho yields her body to a man for his pleasure\\nmerely, either in return for money, or for a\\nhome, or for peace in the household, prostitutes\\nherself to him. Even caresses are demoralizing\\nif they are received with mere passivity. Their\\nlegitimate function is to communicate affection\\nand stimulate kindly feeling. Caresses should\\nbe given for the sake of the one caressed, not for\\nself-gratification merely. We find, therefore, in\\ninequality of desire a grave objection to sexual\\nintercourse at times when its natural function is\\nin abeyance. Intercourse at such times is almost\\nalways for the gratification, or for the health/\\nof the man.\\nA third objection to this course lies in the fact\\nthat functionless gratification is wasteful and\\ndemoralizing. To seek pleasure for pleasure s\\nsake not only defeats function, but even lessens\\npleasure. To make pleasure the end in sexual\\nrelations is particularly bad because the highest\\nphysical powers and the strongest social ties are\\nhere involved, and if they are prostituted, the\\nwhole man is in the mire.\\n3. Involving less limitation upon the gratifica-", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0099.jp2"}, "100": {"fulltext": "96 RTHtCAL MARRIAGE.\\ntion of passion, but more regulation of procrea-\\ntion, comes the third alternative to continence;\\nnamely, the use of special devices to prevent\\nconception. The general use of such devices in\\nany country has often been pointed out as the\\nmark of moral and physical degeneration. It is\\nno part of our purpose to take up in this book\\nthe various means that are used with greater or\\nless success to thwart nature in the matter of\\npropagation.^^ It is asserted by some that con-\\nception can be prevented by means entirely\\nharmless to physical health. But many methods\\nused for this purpose are surely harmful, and it\\nseems doubtful whether, on general principles,\\nwe could expect a method to be found which\\nwould be uniformly successful and at the same\\ntime cause no weakening of the organs of genera-\\ntion. As no one, apparently, claims that con-\\nception can be prevented by agreeable means, the\\ndiscomforts of thwarting nature must be set\\nover against the pleasures of indulgence, even\\nwhere pleasure alone is considered. But the\\npractice of preventing conception removes the\\nmost important restraint upon excessive indul-\\ngence, while it adds to the wastefulness and\\ninjury of frequent intercourse the humiliating\\nconsciousness that the indulgence of passion is\\nunnatural, and subjects the man or the woman\\nto the physical harm usually if not always the", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0100.jp2"}, "101": {"fulltext": "ALTERNATIVES TO CONTINENCE. 97\\nresult of artificial methods of limiting procrea-\\ntion. Of course the woman is freed from the\\nburdens of unwelcome child-bearing, and both\\nparties are relieved of the obliquity which\\nattaches to the procreation of offspring fore-\\ndoomed to misery. But frequently the attempt\\nto prevent conception fails and the couple are\\nconfronted by a most humiliating condition.\\nIn such cases the unwelcome offspring is some-\\ntimes grudgingly accepted and cared for as far\\nas formal law requires; but often abortion is\\nattempted. When this by no means uncommon\\npractice is resorted to, the mother is subjected\\nto greater physical danger than in child-birth\\nitself. It is said that many women who are\\nconscientious in all other matters do not scruple\\nto rid themselves of their unborn children by\\nwhatever means they can command.\\nThis moral irresponsibility and recklessness\\nof physical danger on the part of married women\\nis doubtless to be attributed to the conditions\\nwhich cause so much involuntary motherhood.\\nA good deal is being said about prostitution\\nwithin the marriage bond. One author reminds\\nus that our laws sanction the rape of a married\\nwoman. This is no pleasing picture of the\\nrelations of husband and wife, but it seems to\\nbe accurate. There can be no doubt that abor-\\ntion is a crime against the mother s own body,\\n7", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0101.jp2"}, "102": {"fulltext": "98 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nand against the moral instincts of humanity.\\nHow much less can be said of the act which\\ncauses involuntary motherhood in marriage for\\nthe sake of a man s gratification? One of the\\nblackest crimes that can be committed is the\\nbringing into the world of a deformed or idiotic\\nchild where conception has been involuntary,\\nand abortion has been tried without success.\\nFew would venture to publicly defend abor-\\ntion in any case except where the life of the\\nmother demands the sacrifice of the embryo.\\nBut sexual passion is so strong and the sophis-\\ntries of love are so subtle that not a few people\\nreckoned among the best advocate the use of\\nsome devices to prevent conception. One author\\nstarts out with the major premise that it is the\\nright of every child to be well born. His\\nminor premise is that men will not limit their\\nintercourse to the natural function of rightly\\nconditioned propagation. His conclusion is that\\nconception should be prevented when offspring\\nis not desired, ^e accept the major premise\\nwithout qualification. But the minor premise\\nis the death-warrant of ethical humanity, and\\nwe are not ready to subscribe to it. We may\\nsum up our objections to the gratification of\\nsexual passion accompanied by the use of means\\nto prevent conception by saying that this prac-\\ntice deliberately thwarts natural laws, opens the", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0102.jp2"}, "103": {"fulltext": "ALTERNATIVES TO CONTINENCE. 99\\ndoor wide for sensuality, aggravates the physical\\nwastefulness of functionless pleasure, and is\\ngenerally, if not always, physically injurious to\\nthe man, to the woman, or to both.\\n4. Some recent writers propose a fourth alter-\\nnative to continence. They profess the greatest\\nhorror for the existing evils of marriage, and\\nardently advocate responsible procreation and\\nthe emancipation of woman. They assert, how-\\never, that sexual intercourse has two distinct and\\nequally worthy functions; one to perpetuate the\\nrace, the other to bring pleasure or spiritual\\ndevelopment to the individual. They propose\\nas a solution of the problem, that the union of\\nhusband and wife, when propagation is not its\\nobject, should be so controlled as to prevent the\\norgasm. The practice, it is said, was prevalent\\nin the Oneida Community, and receives the\\nunqualified support of a number of writers. Its\\nadvocates are, as a rule, persons with a disposi-\\ntion to accept the teachings of occultism. They\\nhave a ready explanation for the mysterious\\nforces of life which have so far baffled inductive\\nscience. To them sexual attraction appears to\\nbe the highest manifestation of the laws of the\\nuniverse. There is no need to affirm or deny in\\nthis place the possibility of attaining, in indi-\\nvidual cases, sufficient conscious control of the\\nLife.", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0103.jp2"}, "104": {"fulltext": "lOO ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\ninternal mechanism of the body to prevent the\\nculmination of the sexual act while the organs are\\nin union. It is certain, however, that most\\npeople, in their present stage of spiritual devel-\\nopment, would run great risk in attempting to\\nput this theory into practice. And one is forci-\\nbly reminded in this connection of the story in\\nwhich the Irishman who said he would keep as\\nfar away from the precipice as possible was\\nselected as coachman in preference to other\\napplicants who boasted how near they could\\ndrive without going over.\\nWithout disputing, therefore, the physical\\npossibility of some people s putting into practice\\nthis theory, variously designated as Male con-\\ntinence, Zugassent s discovery, and *Kar-\\nezza, what objections to its teachings may we\\nraise? In the first place, there is the difficulty\\nsuggested in the reference to the Irishman and\\nthe precipice. It will appear to many people\\nthat putting one s self under conditions particu-\\nlarly favorable to the discharge of the life-fluid is\\nhardly the method most conducive to the main-\\ntenance of self-control and the conservation of\\nenergy. And those who are not prepared to\\naccept the dictum of occultism which teaches\\nthat the mind may bring all the activities of the\\nbody, internal as well as external, under con-\\nscious control, will look with suspicion on a\\npractice the aim of which is to thwart the laws", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0104.jp2"}, "105": {"fulltext": "ALTERNATlTES TO COl^TINENCE, lOl\\nof nature and make the body a mere instrument\\nof a sublimated self. The internal mechanism\\nof the body seems to work very well when it has\\na chance. The mind is fully occupied with the\\nfunction of controlling external activities, and\\nproviding conditions under which the body can\\ndo its work normally. Furthermore, if the soul\\nis supreme, it is not clear why the development\\nof spiritual life and the most exalted love in the\\nmarried couple should be dependent upon phys-\\nical contact. The first objection to the practica-\\nbility of the rule of life here under discussion is,\\ntherefore, that it involves an acceptance of occult\\nprinciples and takes the functions of sex out\\nof the realm of science and puts them into the\\nrealm of mysticism.\\nAnother objection lies in the fact that the\\nseparation of pleasure from organic function, and\\nthe exaltation of the former into a definite\\nmotive for conduct is always demoralizing.\\nlyCt us eat, drink, and be merry; for to-mor-\\nrow we die, as a philosophy, is subversive of\\nduty and destructive of all healthy social life.\\nThe pursuit of pleasure for its own sake ends in\\nsurfeit and degeneration.\\nAnother difficulty that presents itself concerns\\nthe education of the young and the relations of\\nunmarried people. If procreation be not recog-\\nnized as the sole determining function of sexual\\nunion, it is practically impossible to show why", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0105.jp2"}, "106": {"fulltext": "10:2 ETttlCAL MARRIAGJE.\\ngratification for pleasure, health, or spiritual\\necstasy should not be permitted to the unmar-\\nried. From this standpoint, to teach children\\nchastity would be about as consistent and effect-\\nive as it is for men who smoke and drink to\\nteach their boys the evil effects of tobacco and\\nliquor upon the young. The only way to present\\nthe relations of sex to a child is to come with\\nan open countenance and a clear, unreserved ex-\\nplanation of natural functions. The distinction\\nbetween prostituting the body for carnal pleas-\\nures and prostituting it for spiritual pleasures\\ncould not be easily comprehended by young peo-\\nple. As a matter of fact, the alternative to con-\\ntinence now being considered seems to have been\\ndiscovered by persons who, by excesses in the\\nearly years of married life, had brought upon\\nthemselves the natural penalties of unrestraint.\\nThe new idea came to them as a way of escape\\nfrom the most grievous burdens of indulgence\\nwithout requiring the abandonment of the grati-\\nfication which their ideals and their habits had\\nmade almost a necessity.\\nWe have now noticed the several possible\\nalternatives to continence, and have found that\\nnone of them satisfies the demands of social duty\\nor personal ethics. It remains to see what force\\nthere is in the several objections to continence\\nas such.", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0106.jp2"}, "107": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER XI.\\nOBJECTIONS TO CONTINKNCB IN MARRIAGE-\\nTHE objections to marital continence most\\noften uiged may be formulated as follows:\\n1. Continence is injurious to a man because\\nthe more or less frequent emission of semen is\\nunavoidable, and causes injury unless it occurs in\\nthe normal way; i. e. through sexual union.\\n2. Continence is ascetic; it is the old celibacy\\nidea slightly modified; it crucifies love, and slaps\\nnature in the face; it is altogether wrong from\\nthe standpoint of morals and religion.\\n3. Continence makes self-control more difl\\ncult. The easiest way to live a rational life is\\nby moderation in the gratification of desires;\\nunsatisfied passion is cumulative.\\n4. Granting that procreation is the determin-\\ning function of sexual intercourse, yet so little\\nis known about the laws of reproduction, and\\nthe chances of impregnation as the result of a\\nsingle union are so small, that when offspring is\\ndesired frequent intercourse should be had until\\nthe woman is without doubt pregnant.\\nI. Those who object to continence on the\\nscore of health do not claim that this rule of life\\n103", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0107.jp2"}, "108": {"fulltext": "I04 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nis antagonistic to woman* s physical well-being.\\nThe indulgence of passion is man s necessity.\\nThus we have at the outset a claim of essential\\ninequality in the relations of the two. Woman s\\nbody becomes an instrument for the preservation\\nof man s health. This condition of affairs,\\nthough not distasteful to people of the Oriental\\nschool, is not relished by Western women, or by\\nmen who regard women as their equals and com-\\npanions. But if nature and the welfare of the\\nrace unite in afBrming this proposition, we\\nought not to reject it for a mere sentiment!\\nNature s position can be ascertained by the\\nobservation of the sexual habits of animals. It\\nappears that everywhere the male is endowed\\nwith more active and continuous sexual 4esires.\\nOften at the pairing season fierce battles are\\nfought among the males for precedence with the\\nfemales. Some animals are monogamic, and\\nwith them the male has to content himself with\\nthe gratification of desire when a single female\\nis willing to receive his approaches or can be\\nforced to do so. But although the male is\\nusually the stronger of the two, the female can\\nas a rule maintain control over her own body,\\nand it is a matter of general observation that the\\nmale is received only at certain periods favorable\\nto procreation. On the other hand some animals\\n^re polygamous, and among them the result of", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0108.jp2"}, "109": {"fulltext": "CONTINENCE IN MARRIAGE. 105\\ncompetition is a selection of the few strongest or\\nmost cunning males for pairing, while all the\\nrest are excluded from the gratification of their\\npassions. This condition obtains among domes-\\ntic animals where their sex life is exploited by-\\nman for breeding purposes.\\nIt is not inconceivable that a socialistic state\\nmight adopt a similar system with reference to\\nhuman marriage, the few choicest men being\\nreserved for procreation and all the rest made\\neunuchs. There would be something to say\\nfor such a regulation on the score of the im-\\nprovement of the species, artificial selection being\\nused simply to accelerate natural selection. But\\nthe consciousness of brotherhood and the belief\\nin democracy render this solution of the problem\\nof sexual desire impossible among the most\\nenlightened peoples. Moreover, if sexual inter-\\ncourse were required for health we could not\\nlimit its privileges to the few who are best fitted\\nfor procreation. But nature, although indicating\\nthat male passion is more persistent and more\\nactive than female, does not provide means for\\nits gratification, as she certainly would if its\\nrestraint were injurious to the individual. The\\nevident reason for the activity and persistence\\nof sexual desire in the male is nature s care that\\nthe perpetuation of the species shall not fail.\\nWe have now to inquire how it is that men", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0109.jp2"}, "110": {"fulltext": "I06 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nhave succeeded in outwitting nature, and have\\nsecured for themselves the unKmited indulgence\\nof their sexual instincts, and upon what grounds\\nthe claim of man s necessity is now made.\\nEvidently human beings through their superior\\nintelligence can influence each other in a way\\nimpossible to lower animals. And undoubtedly\\nman has habitually secured the privilege of\\nunlimited sexual indulgence by giving woman\\nsomething in exchange. The appeal to fear, to\\nthe hope of reward, and to the sentiment of love\\nhas overbalanced woman s natural aversion to\\nfunctionless unions, and she has bartered the use\\nof her body for comforts and luxuries, or has\\ngiven it away in obedience to the demands of a\\nmistaken altruism. This relation of the sexes to\\neach other has become fixed in the institution of\\nhuman marriage so that the terms of the bargain\\nare generally taken for granted without any\\nspecifications. And undoubtedly woman s pas-\\nsions have been greatly developed in the process,\\nso that now they are often almost as persistent\\nas man s. Man s passions also have increased\\nwith indulgence, until he has come to consider\\ntheir gratification a legitimate and necessary\\nright of marriage.*^\\nSexual desire manifests itself with different\\ndegrees of strength in different persons of the\\nsame sex; and we may reasonably conclude that", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0110.jp2"}, "111": {"fulltext": "CONTINENCE IN MARRIAGE. I07\\nits strength is largely determined by education\\nand habits of life. All moralists require chastity\\nof the unmarried, and thus admit that it is pos-\\nsible. We know, however, that multitudes of\\nboys are addicted in some degree to the solitary\\nvice, and that many unmarried men indulge their\\nanimal instincts through promiscuous relations\\nwith unchaste women. There is no doubt that\\nthe perversion of passion renders it more imperi-\\nous, and that indulgence makes self-control more\\ndifficult.\\nIt is a disputed question whether or not a\\nhealthy man needs to discharge his seed at more\\nor less regular intervals. Many of the most\\nrenowned thinkers of the world have been un-\\nmarried, while on the other hand many men have\\nundoubtedly been physically and mentally weak-\\nened by marital excesses. The conditions of life\\nare so variable and so obscure that it is not easy\\nto dogmatize upon the internal processes of the\\nphysical organs. But if the discharge of semen\\nbe necessary for a healthy man s relief, nature\\nhas certainly provided a remedy by causing in-\\nvoluntary emissions.*^ A more frequent dis-\\ncharge induced by the use of a woman s body\\nwould not seem especially suited to the require-\\nments of health and bodily economy. We need\\nnot, therefore, attempt to answer the purely\\nscientific question as to the necessity of emis-", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0111.jp2"}, "112": {"fulltext": "io8 ETHICAL Marriage.\\nsions. Most boys and- men undoubtedly have\\nthem, and have them more frequently than is\\ngood for their physical welfare. These excessive\\nwastes are caused by indulgence in thought or\\naction, and are not a reason for indulgence.\\nPassion is cultivated, it would almost seem,\\ndeliberately. The ideal of marriage itself as a\\nstate in which people have freedom of indulgence\\nwithout being even reproved by the current sanc-\\ntions of morality, is a powerful factor in develop-\\ning insatiable desire in the unmarried. Shame,\\nalso, which conceals the body and makes sex a\\nmystery, no doubt stimulates the passions. Most\\nimportant of all, the lack of correct teaching in\\nearly childhood lets boys and sometimes girls,\\ndrift into the indiscretions of youth which, if\\nthey do not ruin health, at least make life sensual\\nand desire well-nigh uncontrollable. The pas-\\nsions are further stimulated by suggestive art\\nand obscene stories. Not only is the mind left\\nto drift into sensuality, but the body is pampered\\nby rich food, and the system is demoralized by\\nstimulants. There can be no doubt that liquor,\\nnarcotics, and highly-seasoned or unsuitable\\nfoods either directly stimulate the sexual organs\\nor render the nervous system less capable of\\nkeeping them in control. Furthermore, the\\norgans are frequently irritated by ill-fitting gar-\\nments, or through the neglect of cleanliness.", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0112.jp2"}, "113": {"fulltext": "CONTINENCE IN MARRIAGE. 1 09\\nAnd lastly, in a strange climax of absurdity,\\nsome men regard sexual intercourse necessary\\non account of the stimulation of desire induced\\nby sleeping with their wives. As if men did not\\nsleep with women chiefly for the purpose of\\ngratifying their passions.\\nWhen we consider how little effort is made to\\nguard against excessive sensuality, and how it is\\nalmost deUberately cultivated, the assertion of\\nman s necessity appears to be a flimsy ex-\\ncuse for anti-social action. Continence has been\\nproved by some to be a perfectly feasible and\\naltogether salutary rule of life. The objection\\nurged against it on sanitary grounds indicates,\\nnot that continence is impracticable, but rather\\nthat the duty of self-restraint, if fully carried out,\\nwould prevent the existence of conditions under\\nwhich continence is said to be unhealthful.*^\\nA convincing answer to this claim that health\\nrequires the indulgence of passion, even if we\\nwere to grant that men would be better off, on\\nthe whole, for occasional union with women, is\\nfound in the humiliation of the latter. Suppos-\\ning that women should say, Itis not healthy\\nto be pregnant and bear children. It is a great\\ndrain upon our strength. It limits our freedom.\\nIt causes us much pain and often kills us out-\\nright. Therefore Vv^e will have none of it. L^et\\nthe race be perpetuated as it may. Social duty", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0113.jp2"}, "114": {"fulltext": "no ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\ndoes not bind us to sacrifice comfort, health, and\\nfreedom for somebody else s sake. Such a pro-\\ntest put into execution would hurry society\\nalong the road to extinction, and men would\\nfiercely denouitce women s cruel selfishness.\\nBut what is to be said for the man who, for the\\nsake of his individual satisfaction, or even for\\nthe sake of some slight increment of health,\\nwould pile his burdens upon the back of a\\nwoman already loaded down with the pains and\\ndangers of menstruation, pregnancy, and child-\\nbearing? What is to be said of the young fellow\\nwho has wasted himself until, to alleviate his\\ncondition, he marries a healthy girl to shift upon\\nher and a family of children as much as he can\\nof the penalties of his indiscretion What is to\\nbe said of the rugged husband who, for the sake\\nof his health, compels his wife to choose\\nbetween chronic pregnancy and the discomforts,\\ndangers, and moral deadening attendant upon\\nabortion and the use of expedients to prevent\\nconception? The doctrine of man s necessity\\nwas born of sensual indulgence, and is perpetu-\\nated by self-deception and overweening self-\\nishness.\\n2. The second objection urged against conti-\\nnence is that it is ascetic. It is said to be based\\non the principle that pleasure is evil, and that", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0114.jp2"}, "115": {"fulltext": "CONTINENCE IN MARRIA GE. Ill\\nnatural desires ought to be suppressed. Let it\\nbe understood at the beginning that nature is\\ngood, but that rational men should direct and\\ncontrol natural tendencies. Otherwise, reason\\nwould have no function. The question arising\\nhere is like the one involved in the use of stimu-\\nlants. Some people assert that temperance does\\nnot mean abstinence, but moderate use. The\\nancient Greek is exhibited as the model of a\\ntemperate man. Such a thing as total absti-\\nnence from wine-drinking would have seemed\\nabsurd to the Greek. And the evidences of his-\\ntory show that he was not an ascetic unless it\\nwere at Sparta in the matter of sexual pleas-\\nures. It further appears that this very absence\\nof self-denial was a powerful factor in the\\ndegeneration and collapse of the Greek nation.\\nThe rational definition of temperance is,\\nModerate and right use of good things, and\\ntotal abstinence from bad things. We are not\\ntemperate with the fire because we burn our\\nfingers only once a week. We are not temper-\\nate in the use of arsenic because we take a dose\\nbut once a year. And furthermore, we are not\\ntemperate in the use of bread, if we eat three\\nloaves of the best home-made at every meal.\\nThus the question of abstinence from any par-\\nticular thing is to the temperate man merely a\\nquestion of fact. If he knows that a thing is", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0115.jp2"}, "116": {"fulltext": "112 E THICAL MARRIA GE,\\nharmful or is likely to be, he will abstain from\\nit. If a limited use is good for him, he will use\\nit in a limited way.\\nThere are two classes of people widely sepa-\\nrated by their attitude toward the indulgence\\nof desire. One takes the ground that if the\\neffect of a particular act is known to be bad in\\nmost cases, and if there is no clear reason for\\nexpecting a good effect from it in a particular\\ncase, they will abstain from it, even if abstinence\\ninvolves some self-restraint. The other class are\\ninclined to gratify their desires whenever it can\\nnot be shown that in the individual case such\\naction will be harmful. They do not admit use-\\nlessness as a reason for abstinence. On account\\nof the extreme difficulty of determining in each\\nindividual case what the effect of an action will\\nbe, the former class adopt the rule of abstinence,\\nand the latter class that of indulgence.\\nFrom our point of view social duty and indi-\\nvidual self-culture require habits of self-control.\\nThey demand the elimination, as far as possible,\\nof all useless things that are likely to be posi-\\ntively injurious, even though in some individual\\ncases injury can not be proved. Asceticism\\nasserts that the body is evil, and that its mem-\\nbers should be mortified for the sake of spiritual\\ndevelopment. Temperance asserts that the life\\nof the body is good if rightly used, but that the", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0116.jp2"}, "117": {"fulltext": "CONTINENCE IN MARRIA GE. 1 1 3\\nlicensing of passion destroys the body and de-\\nthrones the mind. In behalf of continence we\\nurge that the function of sexual union is pro-\\ncreation, to which pleasure and pain are mere\\nincidents. We urge that control of physical\\npassion and economy of nervous energy are the\\nsurest means of securing robust, beautiful, and\\nabundant physical life. Continence, therefore,\\nis not ascetic, but temperate. It is prudent and\\nmanly. It does not look toward the purification\\nof the soul by the mortification of the body, but\\ntoward the development of both body and soul\\nby the right use of both. Continence lays\\nemphasis, not on anarchy, but on responsible\\nfreedom. Weak yielding to the caprice of pas-\\nsion is abject slavery.\\nBut some people say that continence precludes\\nthe highest expression of love. They assert that\\nit puts the relation of the sexes on a purely busi-\\nness basis, and denies the possibility of spiritual-\\nizing material things. **In marriage, it is\\nsaid, there will come moments when love will\\nrise into an ecstasy of self-abandonment, of pas-\\nsionate longing to lose one s self in the loved\\nobject. The thought of self is totally effaced.\\nWhat does nature say at such a moment? It\\ndemands the tribute of sexual union as the\\nnatural and inevitable accompaniment of such\\na feeling. You cheat nature at such a moment\\n8", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0117.jp2"}, "118": {"fulltext": "114 THICAL MARRIA GE.\\nat your peril. The only way to escape injury\\nis never to let love reach such culminating\\nmoments. But that is what love demands.\\nTherefore, better not love. Let the whole thing\\nbe a matter of cold calculation. These words\\nwere used by a man who believed that sexual\\nintercourse as the tribute demanded by\\nnature at those moments when love will rise\\ninto an ecstasy of self-abandonment/ should\\nbe permitted, even though prudential consid-\\nerations might necessitate the use of means\\nto prevent conception. He argued that the\\ntheory of continence would condemn all pleasure\\nin sexual union, and said further: It is the\\nsame with eating. You ought not to enjoy your\\nfood. That is beastly indulgence. Eat solely\\nwith a view to sustaining life, and eliminate all\\nother motives.\\nAll pleadings for irresponsible love are met by\\nthe stubborn fact that the union of the sexes is\\na social act, normally followed by consequences\\nof the most far-reaching importance. The birth\\nof an unwelcome child, and his curses in later\\nyears ought to have a sobering effect even upon\\nthe ecstasy of love. The assertion that love\\ndemands satisfaction at the expense of reason,\\nnature, and the welfare of the race, is the piti-\\nable excuse of a blind teacher whose religion\\nmakes him veneer sensual gratification with the\\nboast of spiritual development.", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0118.jp2"}, "119": {"fulltext": "CONTINENCE IN MARRIA GE. 1 1 5\\nThe remarkable analogy pointed out in the\\nwords last quoted, between pleasure in sexual\\nunion and pleasure in eating requires a moment s\\nattention. Suppose that we, in our exquisite\\nappreciation of the usefulness of eating for the\\nencouragement of sociability and community of\\nthought, should eat unwholesome or unnecessary\\nfood which, like the detective s whisky, must\\nbe carefully diverted into our boots, or which,\\nlike the delicate viands of the pampered Roman\\nbanqueters, must, immediately after the feast,\\nbe removed from the seat of digestion by enforced\\nvomiting or by the use of a stomach pump.\\nThere is no harm in enjoying food, but eating\\nmerely to gratify taste is gluttony. The prin-\\nciple is the same in either case. Satisfaction\\nof desire should not be proportioned to the desire\\nitself, but to the need. True, under normal con-\\nditions, and with no pandering to the senses,\\ndesire tends to be proportionate to the need.\\nThe reasons for the excess of sensual desire over\\nthe needs of reproduction have been pointed out.\\nOur problem is not to devise means for indulging\\nextravagant impulses, but rather to re-establish\\nan equilibrium through the atrophy of passion.\\n3. Another objection sometimes urged against\\ncontinence is allied to the one just discussed. It\\nis said that passion, like hunger, increases if not", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0119.jp2"}, "120": {"fulltext": "1 1 6 E THICAL MARRIA GE.\\nsatisfied. On this theory the regular gratifica-\\ntion of desire makes a normal, self- controlled life\\neasy. The answer to this hypothesis is twofold.\\nIn the first place, if the sexual impulse were the\\nexpression of a regularly recurring physical need,\\nsome physiological means for its satisfaction\\nwould certainly have been furnished in the\\neconomy of nature. That sexual intercourse is\\nno such means is made clear by the wide differ-\\nences between men and women. For, if the\\nman s need recurs regularly, what is to be done\\nduring the woman s pregnancy and nursing In\\nthe second place, experience goes to show that\\nsexual desire is not satisfied by moderate and\\nregular indulgence, but knows no limits except\\nphysical exhaustion or surfeit. Continence is\\neasier than so-called moderation, simply be-\\ncause it draws the line at the logical division\\nbetween functional and f unctionless gratification.\\nIt is undoubtedly true that constantly stimulated\\npassion would cumulate and make life miserable.\\nBut if we were trying to put out a fire we should\\nscarcely think of constantly adding more fuel to\\nthe flames. The trouble is that most people\\nseem to consider passion a fixed and undiminish-\\nable force which must be reckoned with perma-\\nnently at its present face value. As a matter of\\nfact, its stock has been watered, and if we", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0120.jp2"}, "121": {"fulltext": "CONTINENCE IN MARRIA QE. 1 1 7\\nrestore normal conditions, there will be an enor-\\nmous shrinkage in its relative value.\\n4. Finally, we should notice an objection made\\nnot so much against the theory as against the\\npractical program of continence. It is asserted\\nthat impregnation is a very uncertain conse-\\nquence of copulation. Therefore, it is urged,\\npeople who desire offspring need to have frequent\\nintercourse until procreation is assured. Some\\ncolor of plausibility is given to this contention\\nby the facts of everyday life. It is said that on\\nthe average the first child of a fertile union is\\nborn about seventeen months after marriage.**\\nThis would indicate that eight months of fre-\\nquent intercourse pass before conception takes\\nplace, unless, indeed, the shame of having a child\\nin the minimum time after marriage induces\\nmany young people to prevent conception at\\nfinst. It is a well-knownT fact that prostitutes\\nseldom have children; and it seems reasonable to\\nsuppose that too frequent intercourse may hinder\\nimpregnation rather than make it more likely.*^\\nOne authority, speaking of sexual intercourse,\\nsays\\nAs a general rule, the act is and ought to be\\nrepeated but rarely. In newly married people,\\nof course, sexual intercourse takes place more\\nfrequently, and hence it happens that conception", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0121.jp2"}, "122": {"fulltext": "Il8 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\noften fails during the first few months of wed-\\nlock, when probably the semen of the male\\ncontains but few perfect spermatozoa, and in\\nsuch cases it is only when the ardor of first love\\nis abated, and the spermatozoa have been allowed\\nthe time requisite for their full development, that\\nthe female becomes impregnated.\\nIt is undoubtedly true that the number of\\nchildren born into the world bears an insignificant\\nratio to the number of times sexual intercourse\\ntakes place. No one would deny that this fact\\nis largely due to artificial conditions, some of\\nwhich have been indicated in this chapter. There\\nis, however, no particular need to argue the\\npoint for any couple who are well-disposed\\ntoward the theory of continence can very soon\\nfind out for themselves whether or not concep-\\ntion is easily brought about. The program of\\nprocreation suggested on a preceding page, if\\nput into practice, would no doubt set at rest in\\nmost cases the uncertainty regarding a woman s\\nbarrenness. The objection we have been con-\\nsidering here gets practically all its force from\\nthe desire on the part of some conscientious\\nyoung people to find an excuse for the indul-\\ngence of their passions immediately after mar-\\nriage. Almost everyone tries to shirk some portion\\nof responsibility on occasion. But it is unworthy\\nof a Christian man to try to find if he can not", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0122.jp2"}, "123": {"fulltext": "CONTINENCE IN MARRIA GE, 1 1 9\\nmake some slight concession to his worldly pro-\\npensities without outraging his conscience and\\ninviting the wrath of heaven. Rational living is\\nnot irksome, but full of joy.\\nThe conscientious devotee of passion seems to\\nget a large crumb of comfort from his medical\\nauthorities who say that conception ought not to\\nresult from first intercourse. They claim that\\nthe pain and nervous shock generally experi-\\nenced by women on this occasion put them in\\nbad condition for immediate pregnancy. This\\ntheory is brought forward triumphantly as final\\nproof that the doctrine of continence is untenable.\\nIt is absurd not to see that even if we were to\\ngrant the desirability of first intercourse being\\nfruitless, the principle of continence would not\\nbe at all shaken. For under these conditions\\nthe first copulation would be a purposive and\\nresponsible act, having a definite part to play as\\na preliminary and preparatory step in procrea-\\ntion. But there is apparently no good reason for\\nadmitting the necessity of this preliminary act.\\nWhat shocks a woman, and particularly unfits\\nher for motherhood, is nothing inherent in the\\nchange from virginity to wifehood, but rather\\nthe sudden discovery that she is no longer a free\\nwoman. Her lover was all deference to her\\nwishes and respect for her personality. Her\\nhusband, when once the keys to her sanctuary", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0123.jp2"}, "124": {"fulltext": "I20 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nare in his hand, is transformed by some perverse\\nalchemy into a sensual tyrant. He may use vio-\\nlence, he may use only the persuasions of the\\nbenevolent despot; but her freedom is gone.\\nAnother reason for the shock experienced by\\nwomen on the wedding night is the sudden\\nchange in the degree of physical intimacy.\\nUntil men and women have become used to each\\nother s bodies, and can look upon each other\\nwithout vShame, they have no right to violate each\\nother in the sexual embrace. It may be that\\nunder the bCvSt conditions conception will fail to\\nresult from the first intercourse. If so, that is\\nnature s business, and she hardly needs the vol-\\nuntary assistance of pleasure-seeking men.", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0124.jp2"}, "125": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER XII.\\nPRACTICABII.ITY OF CONTINENCE.\\nIT has been our purpose in preceding chapters\\nto show that, from the social standpoint, mar-\\nriage and reproduction are a duty resting upon\\nthe well-equipped members of society, and fur-\\nthermore that children ought to be born as the\\nresult of definite purpose and preparation. A\\nbrief consideration of the physical laws of repro-\\nduction shows that these duties can not be ful-\\nfilled except in connection with the control of\\nsexual passion and the strict limitation of sexual\\nintercourse within the marriage bond. It seems\\nclear that continence, save for procreation, would\\nbe immediately accepted as the natural and fit\\nrule of life for the fulfillment of social obligations\\nby unbiased men and women. It is only because\\nthis rule of Hfe runs counter to strong natural\\nand cultivated passions common in some degree\\nto all men that objections of all kinds are raised\\nagainst continence, and people seem determined\\nto find some other way out of the difficulty, if\\npossible.\\nA theory is not a good theory unless it will\\nwork. An ideal is not an ideal unless it can\\n121", "height": "4403", "width": "2532", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0125.jp2"}, "126": {"fulltext": "122 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nbe realized. A duty is a fraud unless it can\\nbe fulfilled. Integrity is the supreme attribute\\nof character. It is absurd for anyone to speak\\nof chastity as ideal, and to express the hope\\nthat in future generations virtue and purity\\nwill be so innate as to make continence in\\nmarriage possible, unless we proceed at once to\\ntake steps to make virtue and purity innate in\\nfuture generations by practicing them in this\\ngeneration. The future is the child of the pres-\\nent, and there is absolutely no reason to expect\\nit to be better than the present unless we help to\\nmake it so. What we wish to emphasize is that\\nthe ethical obligations of marriage are binding\\nnow. Continence is not ideal unless it is prac-\\nticable.\\nIn view of the almost universal habits of man-\\nkind, it would be folly to deny that there are\\ncertain grave difficulties in the way of the regen-\\neration of marriage along the lines here advo-\\ncated. Most of these difiiculties disappear with\\nthe frank acceptance of continence as a working\\nideal. Physical laws point out the function of\\nsexual union. Duty to one*s self and to society\\nfurnishes the sanction for obedience to these\\nlaws. Knowledge of what is functional and\\nwhat is demoralizing in physical activity will not\\npromote the practice of virtue unless men are\\nethically sound. The question of continence is,", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0126.jp2"}, "127": {"fulltext": "PRACTICABILITY OF CONTINENCE, 1 23\\ntherefore, both physiological and ethical. The\\nfirst requisite for the continent life is the will to\\nobey nature s laws cheerfully/^ Sulking and\\nrebellion inevitably make the task more difl cult.\\nThe man who goes as near the ragged edge of\\ncrime as he can, and still keep out of the clutches\\nof the law, is a despicable citizen. The man\\nwho reaches for every bit of indulgence that he\\ncan get without actually bringing nature s heavy\\nhand down upon him, is incapable of free action.\\nThe writer knows from personal experience\\nthat continence in marriage is practicable, that\\nit does not necessitate a constant struggle with\\npassion, and that it does not cause coldness in\\nFeeling or scantiness in the expression of affec-\\ntion between husband and wife. It is not to be\\nsupposed that continence is made practicable by\\nsheer force of will, but rather that the desire to\\nbe continent is more than half the battle. Yet\\nsexual passion is strong enough, even in the\\nbest of men, so that precautions to render its\\ncontrol easy are not to be despised.\\nThe most efl cient aid to continence is, of\\ncourse, adequate instruction during childhood\\nreceived in time to prevent the development of\\nabnormal sexual habits or morbid curiosity.\\nThe cultivation of frank friendships with persons\\nof the opposite sex during youth, followed in the\\ndays of courtship by freedom of discussion in", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0127.jp2"}, "128": {"fulltext": "124 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nregard to sexual matters, tends to foster the\\nspirit of comradeship between young people,\\nwhich is altogether opposed to unclean thoughts\\nand unclean lives. Ivater, the marriage cere-\\nmony should make no more immediate difference\\nin their lives than the taking of a roommate\\ndoes to a student. The next day after the cere-\\nmony they should go to their work as though\\nnothing had happened. The wedding trip\\nwould in most cases be a temptation to the\\nindulgence of passion. Indeed, it is hard to see\\njust what the wedding trip is for unless it is to\\nremove the newly married couple from the vexa-\\ntions and responsibilities of familiar associations\\nand daily duties in order that they may be freer\\nto indulge in the pleasures for which the mar-\\nriage ceremony is generally considered to be a\\nlicense. Married people ought to go on pleasure\\ntrips, of course, just as other people do, but if\\nthey desire to control their passions they ought\\nto be busy during the first weeks of married life\\nuntil they have gradually become used to more\\nintimate physical associations.\\nIt is sometimes urged that married people\\nshould occupy separate beds or sleeping apart-\\nments. This practice would undoubtedly be of\\ngreat help to those who attempt to be moder-\\nate in their sexual indulgences. For continent\\npeople the question of separate beds should be", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0128.jp2"}, "129": {"fulltext": "PRACTICABILITY OF CONTINENCE, 1 25\\ndetermined primarily on hygienic grounds and on\\nconsiderations of convenience. It is probably\\nsomewhat better for the health of any two people\\nto sleep apart, regardless of age or sex. On the\\nother hand, a married couple whose opportunities\\nfor intimate association are limited, would often\\nfind in the occupation of the same sleeping apart-\\nment opportunities for homelike talks, and ca-\\nresses not at all inconsistent with or dangerous\\nto continence.\\nThe habits of life which develop the most\\nvigorous and healthiest manhood and woman-\\nhood render the control of passion easy. For\\nthis reason a simple diet, plenty of exercise, ab-\\nstinence from stimulants, and the avoidance of\\nexposure and overwork are all directly conducive\\nto the continent life. Indulgence, irregularity,\\nor excess in one direction tends to cause it in\\nanother.\\nFinally, those who would be continent must\\ntrain themselves to look upon all the functions of\\nsex as normal and not needing the constant inter-\\nference of medical practitioners. Many physicians,\\nyielding to the demands of the ailing public, are\\nprincipally engaged in that most ardently pur-\\nsued of all sciences, namely, the science of elud-\\ning penalties. Too often it is the doctor s busi-\\nness to palliate rather than to prevent suflfering,\\nto commute the penalties of his patients sins.", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0129.jp2"}, "130": {"fulltext": "126 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nTo relieve suffering, however caused, is thought\\nto be his undoubted duty. Rendered distrustful\\nby his knowledge of the secret sins of men, the\\nphysician often becomes pessimistic, regards\\nideals as impracticable, and falls a victim to the\\nprejudices of his patients. For this and other\\nreasons medical advice is often worthless and\\nsometimes dangerous. It is best to seek profes-\\nsional advice in regard to sexual matters from\\nknown and trusted physicians only. A little\\nknowledge of the laws of life, the disposition\\nto obey loyally the precepts of nature, and the\\ncapacity to *put two and two together, are\\nenough for the ordinary guidance of those who\\ncontrol their passions.", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0130.jp2"}, "131": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER XIII.\\nMARRIAGE FOR COMPANIONSHIP.\\nFROM the point of view of the state there is\\nno marriage which does not contemplate the\\nphysical union of the sexes and possible procrea-\\ntion; for the chief purpose of marriage as a polit-\\nical institution is the renewal of the race. We\\nhave seen, however, that a careful consideration\\nof the purpose of reproduction would exclude\\nmany persons from participation in this function\\non the ground of unfitness for it. It may be\\nreasonably asked. What is to be done to make\\nthe lives of these excluded persons fruitful and\\nhappy\\nWhile from the social standpoint, reproduction\\nis the central function of the family, from the\\nindividual standpoint other important functions\\nare fulfilled in the home. The chief of these is\\nthe comradeship of men and women, which softens\\nthe hard lines of life, gives balance to character,\\nand all in all tends to make life more worth liv-\\ning in this world. On the basis of continence in\\nmarriage, there is no reason why men and women\\nwho are unfitted for parenthood, should not\\nspend their lives together in homes. They may\\n127", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0131.jp2"}, "132": {"fulltext": "128 ETHICAL MAkRlAGK,\\neven adopt children, and thus enjoy all the bless-\\nings of family life with the single exception of\\nsexual union and procreation. An old man or\\nwoman without a child is a dying limb on the tree\\nof life. The privilege of marriage for companion-\\nship coupled with the adoption of children would\\nvery greatly ameliorate the condition of persons\\nwhom social duty condemns to childlessness.\\nPhysiologically speaking, marriage always in-\\ncludes sexual union. Those who wish to spend\\ntheir lives together in comradeship would not,\\ntherefore, from the standpoint of physiology or\\nabstract ethics, need to have the marriage cere-\\nmony performed. Under conditions as they now\\nexist, however, it is practically necessary for a\\nman and a woman who v/ish to live together in\\nintimate companionship to be married. In\\nany case, if children were to be adopted the state\\nwould have to enforce the permanence of the\\nassociation in family life.\\nTwo courses are open to those who are unfitted\\nfor parenthood, but who desire intimate compan-\\nionship. They may decline to enter into the\\nmarriage contract, and may satisfy themselves\\nwith the intimate association permitted to friends\\nby the public opinion of the community in which\\nthey live; or, they may enter into the marriage\\ncontract and enforce upon themselves the law of\\ncontinence.", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0132.jp2"}, "133": {"fulltext": "MARRIAGE FOR COMPANIONSHIP, T29\\nThus it appears that continence as the rule of\\nmarried life would make it possible to obey both\\nthe commands and the prohibitions imposed by-\\nsocial duty. It would permit the fittest to pro-\\ncreate under conditions that would insure the\\nprogressive development of the race. It would\\nopen the doors of the home to those unfortunate\\npersons who, often through no fault of their\\nown, are rightly to be excluded from the privi-\\nlege of parenthood. The home, which is gener-\\nally founded with little idea of its social function,\\nwould be recognized at once as the primary unit\\nof political life, serving society as the most im-\\nportant and altogether necessary means for the\\ndevelopment of individual culture and social\\ncharacter.", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0133.jp2"}, "134": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0134.jp2"}, "135": {"fulltext": "IV\\nTHE I.INKS OF I,IFE.\\nA woman when she is in travail hath sorrow\\nbecause her hour is come: but when she is delivered\\nof the child she remembereth no more the anguish\\nfor joy that a man is born into the world, fesuSy\\ninfohn i6 21.\\n131", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0135.jp2"}, "136": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0136.jp2"}, "137": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER XIV.\\nFATHERHOOD.\\nONE of the most telling objections to conti-\\nnence that is likely to be urged is the\\nsocalled hardships to man involved in such\\na course. We have already shown that the\\nstrength of man s sexual passions and the conse-\\nquent difficulty of restraining them are the result\\nof careless or deliberate stimulation more than\\nof natural conditions. The abandonment of the\\nhabits which cultivate passion would make con-\\ntrol easy, and would involve a general bracing-up\\nin personal conduct. We are, therefore, prepared\\nto assert that continence brings its own reward\\nin the general superiority of a well-balanced,\\nfunctioning life to a life of unrestraint.\\nBut there are other and more direct benefits to\\nbe expected. In the first place, fathers would\\nbe immune from the sexual diseases and ex-\\nhausted vitality which curse so many incontinent\\nmen. The procreation of a child involves almost\\nno physical drain upon the man s energies. The\\nwhole work of nourishing and caring for the un-\\nborn babe falls directly to the lot of the mother.\\nIf the father s energies were not drained by the\\n133", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0137.jp2"}, "138": {"fulltext": "134 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\ngratification of his passion, this wasted force\\nwould be left for use in providing for the sup-\\nport of the mother and in preparing for the edu-\\ncation of the child.\\nSecondly, with continence put into practice, a\\nlarge item of expense would be saved which now\\ngoes to pay doctors, druggists, nurses, and serv-\\nants, as a consequence of the sicknesses of the\\nwife and the child brought on by nothing but\\nmarital lust. This would be no inconsiderable\\ngain to the man whose income has to be eked out\\nby the utmost economy. The money thus saved,\\nif spent for books, art, music, or other means of\\nhome culture, could not fail to make many an\\nugly fireside cheerful and beautiful.\\nThirdly, and more important than the mere\\navoidance of physical pain and the economy of\\nmoney, come the love and respect of a free\\nwoman. In spite of the independence and sel-\\nfishness of men, there is nothing that means so\\nmuch to them as the gentle companionship and\\nloving confidence of womankind. Women are\\nnot the only sufferers in marriage. In many and\\nmany a home the husband finds a peevish invalid\\nor a worn-out drudge or an idle spendthrift to\\nwelcome his daily return to the domestic hearth.\\nContinence, with the recognition of the true place\\nof home life in the life of the world, would\\nin most cases change all this. The honeymoon", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0138.jp2"}, "139": {"fulltext": "FATHERHOOD. 135\\nwould not be the few weeks succeeding marriage,\\nnow generally wasted in fruitless pleasure-seeking,\\nbut would extend through the long years of mar-\\nried life which gradually unfold the meaning of\\nlove in the supreme co-operation of the family.\\nFourthly, fatherhood would mean the confi-\\ndence and affection of healthy, happy children.\\nSome of the bitterest tragedies of life arise from\\nfilial ingratitude. Children born of accident and\\nendowed with an inheritance of disease or evil\\npassions, curse the fathers by whom they were\\nbegotten. And as the hatred of sons and daugh-\\nters is the most humiliating penalty of parental\\nselfishness, so their trust and inalienable affection\\nare the most satisfying reward of responsible\\nfatherhood. No man need fear the ingratitude\\nof well-bom and well-homed children.\\nFifthly, continence would tend to free men\\nfrom the domination of passion. **He that\\nruleth his spirit is greater than he that taketh a\\ncity. The great majority of men live in misera-\\nble slavery to one or more bad habits. The de-\\nsire of sex is acknowledged to be the most power-\\nful instinct that leads men into vice. Every evil\\nhabit and every uncontrolled passion is an incubus\\nupon a man, taking away his self-respect and\\nlessening his capacity for appreciating good and\\nbeautiful things. A temperate life such as con-\\ntinence implies would free him from his petty", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0139.jp2"}, "140": {"fulltext": "136 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nmasters, and make him once more the upward-\\nlooker.\\nFinally, the highest reward of faithful father-\\nhood is the consciousness of participation in the\\nwork of race development. To see in one s\\nchild a living embodiment of one s own best life,\\na work of art that transcends all the monuments\\nof wealth and genius, a link in the unending\\ngolden chain that leads on from the crude present\\nto the ideal future, a life that embodies one s own\\nimmortality and unites one with the work and\\ndestinies of the world, such is the vision of\\nideal fatherhood.^^", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0140.jp2"}, "141": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER XV.\\nMOTHERHOOD.\\nTHE immunities and opportunities that con-\\ntinence and purposeful procreation would\\nbring to motherhood are numerous and impor-\\ntant. Standing out first and foremost, visible\\neven to the blind, is the relief of woman from\\nthe diseases peculiar to her sex. These ills\\nare caused chiefly by unregulated sexual inter-\\ncourse and by carelessness with reference to her\\nsex nature. The first cause would be removed\\nby continence, the second by the sense of respon-\\nsibility in motherhood. Woman would be free\\nfrom the taxes of lust, from most of her sickness\\nduring pregnancy and in child-bed, from the\\ndangers of abortion, from the burdens of unwel-\\ncome child-bearing and child-care, from prema-\\nture age. By means of better knowledge and a\\nhigher sense of her social responsibility she\\nwould be able to avoid the suffering so often\\ncaused by overwork or exposure when she needs\\nrest and warmth.\\nA second great immunity would come to\\nwoman in her enfranchisement in the home. In\\na continent marriage she would retain the same\\n137", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0141.jp2"}, "142": {"fulltext": "138 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\ncontrol over her body that she had in her girl-\\nhood, and would escape that bitter sense of deg-\\nradation and humiliation which is the result of\\nprostitution in marriage and out of it. Mar-\\nriage would no longer be to her the bartering of\\nher freedom for a mess of pottage. It is said\\nthat many wives are afraid to caress their hus-\\nbands because of the likelihood of exciting pas-\\nsions for the gratification of which they would\\nhave to submit their bodies as a vicarious offer-\\ning. Woman s patient love is often requited\\nwith brutality or unfaithfulness. Continence\\nwould remedy this, and would remove the chief\\ncause of a woman s jealousy; for it is the knowl-\\nedge of her husband s sensuality in his relations\\nwith herself that gives a wife ground for suspect-\\ning his infidelity.\\nAnother benefit to woman arising from the\\npurification of the marriage bond would be a\\nmuch greater freedom in dress. With the elimi-\\nnation of shame a woman would be able to adopt\\na style of clothing suited to her work; and, cer-\\ntainly within the home, she would be free to rid\\nherself of the impedimenta which largely increase\\nthe difiiculties of housework. A woman does\\nnot know what freedom of movement is until\\nshe has tried physical exercise without corset or\\nskirts in a gymnasium or elsewhere. The ex-\\ntreme conservatism exhibited by most women with", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0142.jp2"}, "143": {"fulltext": "MOTHERHOOD. 139\\nreference to dress reform, though partly to be\\naccounted for on the score of a mania for being\\nin style, is principally due to delicacy resulting\\nfrom the sense of shame, and the prurient curi-\\nosity of men. The adoption of so mild a reform\\nas the wearing of short skirts in stormy weather\\nand the shortening of skirts at all times so that\\nthey will not sweep up dust and filth, would add\\nmuch to wom an s comfort, and would be an im-\\nportant sanitar}^ measure for mother and children\\nat home.\\nThe more vigorous health resulting from free-\\ndom in dress and delivery from sexual slavery,\\nwould bring much wider opportunities to women\\nin all the activities of life. The wife would be\\nno longer confined to her home the greater part\\nof the time by sheer physical^inability to main-\\ntain outside interests of her own. Woman would\\nfind her position in society immeasurably exalted\\nif she were no longer looked upon as created\\nprincipally to serve the pleasure of man. Un-\\nmarried women have already attained a position\\nof considerable independence, though still ham-\\npered by unequal conditions in the struggle for\\nself-support. But under the new rule of mar-\\nriage the wife and mother would be honored\\nabove other women, and her freedom would be\\nlimited only by the limitations of her self-\\nchosen work, the work of home-making. No", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0143.jp2"}, "144": {"fulltext": "140 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nmatter how free woman may be made, the in-\\nstincts of nature and the needs of society will\\nstill lead her to motherhood as her most impor-\\ntant and best-loved work.\\nMuch is said about the sacredness of the\\nrelation between mother and child. Unwel-\\ncome children are not always deluded by this\\npoetic ideal, realized in some cases, to be sure,\\nbut often seen as a cruel mockery. Motherhood\\nis not sacred if it results from prostitution; but\\nwith continence and responsibility, it rises into a\\ndivine function. The crown of motherhood,\\noften selfishly and unworthily sought, and often\\nshunned as a crown of thorns, is nevertheless\\na diadem of light when it adorns the brow of a\\nreal queen/^\\nIn purposeful motherhood, woman will find a\\nnew ideal of love. The selfish elements of her\\naffection will be eliminated by the sense of social\\nresponsibility. The passion that now overwhelms\\nher fancy and makes the happiness and useful-\\nness of her life depend upon the requiting love of\\nsome hero of her girlhood, will be softened and\\ndeepened into the steadfast purpose to make her-\\nself worthy of the noblest companionship, and to\\nrespect the call of duty more than the capricious\\ninclinations of youth. I^ove will cease to be to\\nwoman the possession of an object upon which\\nshe may lavish her devotion without stint. Her", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0144.jp2"}, "145": {"fulltext": "MOTHERHOOD. I41\\nhorizon will no longer be limited to her lover s\\npersonality, her child will no longer be a pet\\nto be kept in babyhood as long as possible and\\nclung to with frantic insistence when the time\\ncomes for him to assume the duties of mature\\nlife on his own account. lyove will be a work,\\nrather than an enjoyment. The mother will see\\nin her duties in the home the great functions of\\nprotecting, nourishing, and developing the young\\nlife destined to make the humanity of the next\\ngeneration more generous and mighty than the\\nhumanity of this. She will find in her work\\nthe best guarantee of future happiness and integ-\\nrity; namely, the service that makes life worth\\nliving now, a joyful,^ thing, a thing of beauty\\nand cultured association, for man and child as\\nwell as for herself.\\nI saw a woman sleeping. In her sleep she\\ndreamt I^ife stood before her and held in each\\nhand a gift in the one I^ove, in the other Free-\\ndom. And she said to the woman, Choose.\\nAnd the woman waited long; and she said,\\nFreedom!\\nAnd lyife said, *Thou hast well chosen. If\\nthou hadst said, I^ove, I would have given\\nthee that thou didst ask for; and I would have\\ngone from thee and returned to thee no more.\\nNow, the day will come when I shall return.\\nIn that day I shall bear both gifts in one hand,", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0145.jp2"}, "146": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER XVI.\\nCHILDHOOD.\\nONE of the corollaries of the proposition that\\nreproduction is a social :duty is the obliga-\\ntion to bring children into the world only under\\nconditions favorable to their future usefulness.\\nContinence would be a most important factor in\\ngiving a good birth to children. There is a\\npopular .notion that all the influences operating\\non a child before birth are hereditary, and there-\\nfore not subject to the voluntary control of\\nparents. As a matter of fact, the direct influ-\\nences of environment begin with the conception\\nof the child in the mother s womb, and parents\\nare not less but rather more responsible for pre-\\nnatal than for postnatal influences.\\nWhether or not the child is to be well-born\\ndepends upon the nutrition and nervous condi-\\ntion of the mother during pregnancy, as well as\\nupon the clean virility of the father at the time\\nof impregnation. A condition of nerves and\\nnourishment fit for reproduction can not be con-\\njured up by the mother in a week or a month by\\na little care with reference to diet, exercise, and\\nmental application. The history of our whole\\n142", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0146.jp2"}, "147": {"fulltext": "CHILDHOOD. t43\\nlives is written in our flesh and blood to-day.\\nThe well-being of a child is affected by the whole\\npast lives of the parents, and much that is ac-\\ncredited to the influence of heredity is but the\\neffect of an environment which has been built up\\nthrough the long years of preparation for parent-\\nhood, and which can not be reconstructed by an\\nawakened conscience immediately preceding the\\nbegetting of children. It is, therefore, clear that\\nthe cherishing of pure ideals and the strict con-\\ntrol of passion at all times as well as during\\npregnancy will contribute immeasurably to the\\nwelfare of the child. The puny, crying babies\\nthat come into our homes, cursed and to curse,\\nwould either not be conceived or would be born\\nwith healthy bodies and sound nervous organi-\\nzations.\\nTo be well-born includes the two elements,\\nhealth and welcome. To be well-born! How\\nindefeasible a right! How rare an opportunity!\\nTo feel no more that the past has cursed us, and\\nthat in order to grow we must amputate it! To\\nknow that we are the children of love and pur-\\npose, and that our bodies contain the best blood\\nand the steadiest nerves that healthy parents\\ncould give us! To see that our work is one with\\nthe work of the past generation, that the founda-\\ntion is already laid, that we do not need to clear\\naway the rubbish of some old tottering temple of", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0147.jp2"}, "148": {"fulltext": "144 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nlife and begin painfully and slowly at the lowest\\nfoundations to build a new mansion worthy of\\nthe soul I To be able to love our fathers and\\nmothers through knowledge rather than through\\nignorance! O what joy in a welcome, well-\\nfathered, well-mothered babe\\nBut the child needs more than to be well-born.\\nHe needs to be well-bred. Good breeding is not\\nchiefly training in elegant speech and manners,\\nthough these are not to be despised; but pri-\\nmarily it consists in the capacity to appreciate\\nsocial interests. Courtesy is self-respecting kind-\\nness directed by intelligence.\\nUp to the time of birth nutrition is the chief\\ndemand of the child. But soon afterward the\\ntaming of selfish instincts in the struggle for life\\nand the development of intelligence and altruis-\\ntic tendencies must begin. For this work the\\nfirst requisite is a good home. Even under\\nexisting conditions, with marriage steeped in\\nsensuality, with many families stricken with\\nsickness and poverty, with child-life often ren-\\ndered miserable by the quarrels and the tyranny\\nof parents, the home is still about all that a child\\nhas for protection and the opportunities for de-\\nvelopment. There are some homes in which\\nchildren have been reared in freedom and happi-\\nness, and to which grown-up sons and daughters\\nlook back with reverence and love. And it is", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0148.jp2"}, "149": {"fulltext": "CHILDHOOD, 145\\nHot easy to conceive how beautiful and how dear\\nan ideal home would be to the children born and\\nreared in it.\\nAt home the child gets sleep and food with all\\nthe intense experiences connected with them.\\nAt home the child is clothed, and home is\\nthe center of all that world of sentiment which\\nattaches to dress, from the shame of nakedness\\nto the pride of ornament. Here the child re-\\nceives its care, first during the helplessness of\\ninfancy, then in times of sickness or accident or\\ndistress of mind. Here the child learns to walk\\nand to talk, and is initiated into the realm of\\nknowledge. Here the baby girl gets her first\\ndolly and the baby boy his first hobby-horse.\\nAt home the sense of duty is born, and the ideals\\nof conduct are matured. Religion and morality,\\nconfidence and love, are interpreted to the child\\nthrough his home.\\nMuch has been said about the possibility of\\nmolding human character during the first few\\nyears of childhood but we sometimes overlook\\nthe importance of a home that watches over its\\nchildren till the end of their immaturity. The\\nsuperiority of man over the beasts has been\\nshown to be in large measure due to his longer\\nperiod of infancy.^^ May we not believe that\\na home which extends its beneficent influence\\nover the lives of its children past the first period", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0149.jp2"}, "150": {"fulltext": "146 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nof youth and well into the period when rational\\nideals can be fully grasped, will be able to usher\\nin a higher humanity than the world has yet\\nseen?\\nWe need hardly say that the degree in which\\nthe home fulfills its opportunities and answers\\nits responsibilities is dependent upon the intelli-\\ngence, harmonious co-operation, and loyalty to\\nduty of the home-makers. All the benefits ac-\\ncruing to fathers and mothers from adherence to\\nthe ideals of ethical marriage would be enjoyed\\nwith increase by their children. The rule of life\\nthat would simplify diet, promote cleanliness,\\nand prevent waste of physical energy in the par-\\nents would insure better care and less temptation\\nto evil habits in the children. In the matter of\\nfood alone intelligent care during childhood\\nwould prevent habits of gluttony and extrava-\\ngance which take away so much of the genuine\\npleasure and efficiency of life in numberless\\ncases. Bread and butter with an abundance of\\nplay give children more pleasure than do cake\\nand candy with stomach-ache and stupidity.\\nParents are too apt to look at childhood as a\\nfact that exists for their own comfort or annoy-\\nance. If the former, they treat their children as\\nplaythings, and try to keep them in babyhood and\\ninnocence as long as possible. If the latter\\nis true, as it often is with unwelcome children,", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0150.jp2"}, "151": {"fulltext": "CHILDHOOD. 147\\nthe parents regard their boys and girls as neces-\\nsary burdens which must be endured in some\\nway or other until they are big enough to shift\\nfor themselves, or to contribute by their labor to\\nthe family income. In one case the child is con-\\nsidered pure and beautiful, the ideal of human\\nperfection, destined to be tarnished and to be-\\ncome a sort of fallen angel as it grows into\\nmanhood or womanhood. It is a doctrine of\\ncurrent pessimism that this fall is inevitable,\\nthat a man s life begins as a success and ends as\\na failure. From the other point of view the\\nquestion of purity is not involved, and the child\\nis considered simply a useless creature to be hur-\\nried into usefulness with all possible celerity.\\nBoth of these views are irresponsible, the\\nresult of selfish marriages, in which the social\\ngood has been subordinated to personal conven-\\nience. In reality the child s life exists for itself\\nand for its completion in maturity. A child\\nshould be neither a plaything nor a drudge. In\\na good home the parents will make the child s\\npresent happiness and future welfare the two-\\nfold determining motive in their parental care.\\nIf we are to make any discrimination among the\\nperiods of life, we must give higher value to the\\ntrained and purposeful activities of mature man-\\nhood and womanhood than to the innocent\\nprattle and hilarious play of childhood; and,", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0151.jp2"}, "152": {"fulltext": "1 48 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\ntherefore, where the child s future welfare is in\\nconflict with his present desire, the latter should\\nalways be brought into subordination. But\\nwithin the necessary limits of development and\\nof growth in self-control, the best preparation\\nfor a useful life is a free, glad childhood.\\nOf the more specific benefits that would come\\nto the child as a result of pure ideals in family\\nlife, the most important is protection from the\\nvices of youth. As already pointed out, the\\nsense of shame and a belief in the all but inevita-\\nble sensuality of sex life prevent most parents\\nwho have regard for current ideals of social\\nethics from carefully teaching their children the\\nmeaning of sex relations and the functions of the\\norgans of sex. In many cases, doubtless, this\\nfailure is due to sheer ignorance on the part of\\nparents, who were themselves left to pick up\\nwhat knowledge they could without instruction,\\nand, by reason of faulty ideals, quack literature,\\nand orthodox doctors, have had little or no expe-\\nrience in anything but the pathology of sex.\\nThe direct result of ignorance and shame is self-\\nabuse, the characteristic vice of youth. Chil-\\ndren s questions are not answered in good faith.\\nThey are often told that God sends the babies.\\nThis explanation of their origin is in many cases\\na pitiable black lie, calculated to hide from them\\nfor a time the knowledge of their real origin.", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0152.jp2"}, "153": {"fulltext": "CHILDHOOD. 149\\nSome excellent people are of the opinion that\\nthe facts of sex life can not be safely imparted\\nto young children. The fact is, the ideals,\\nthe consciousness, and the functions of sex\\noccupy so conspicuous a place in the life of\\nevery community, that all knowledge of these\\nthings can not long be kept from any one. The\\never-recurring phenomena of birth, marriage,\\nand death can not but lead children to make\\ninquiries, honest answers to which involve a full\\nexplanation of sex. The common argument that\\nthere is no reason for instructing children in sex\\nmatters until they have reached the stage in\\ntheir physical development when the sexual life\\nis ready to function, although seemingly plausi-\\nble, is met, first, by the practical necessity for\\nforestalHng the evil effects of vicious information;\\nand, secondly, by the fact that all the relations of\\nlife are vitally connected with sex, and the bodies\\nof children are being prepared or unfitted for the\\nfunctions of mature life long before puberty.\\nThe real difficulty is in the sense of shame, and\\nparents who fear the effects of knowledge upon\\nchildren will speedily lose their fears if they\\neliminate all grossness and consciousness of sen-\\nsuality from their own lives. In the ideal home,\\nuncleanness in word, thought, or action would\\nbe the only acknowledged reason for shame.\\nChildren would be brought up to know them-", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0153.jp2"}, "154": {"fulltext": "i50 ETItlCAL MARRIAGE.\\nselves and each other, and the prurient curiosity\\nto see the human form and understand the func-\\ntions of the human body would be forestalled\\nby knowledge naturally acquired or responsibly\\ngiven. And perhaps the most powerful of all\\nthe forces going to make child-life pure and to\\nredeem youth from its destroying vices would be\\nthe substitution of continence for self-indulgence\\nas the current ideal of married life.\\nThe greatest of all the benefits coming from the\\nacceptance of ethical ideals in marriage would be\\nthe child s training in the freedom and responsi-\\nbility that are required to fit him for participation\\nin the work of the world. Along with the sense\\nof responsibility for his own health and for the\\nright use of his physical energies would come\\nthe seUvSe of wider responsibility for the fulfill-\\nment of his parents* social ideals. Youths and\\nmaidens would feel that it is incumbent upon\\nthem to be better than their fathers and mothers\\nin proportion as their opportunities are greater,\\nand to hand down to the future still better oppor-\\ntunities and still higher ideals. Children ought\\nto be free to grow away from the ideas of their\\nparents, but only by growing into more living\\nthought.\\nAn ideal, a compelling idea It is the rudder\\nwithout v/hich freedom drifts into anarchy. An\\nideal enforces the highest and truest responsibil-", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0154.jp2"}, "155": {"fulltext": "CHILDHOOD. 151\\nity. We can not set bounds to the possibilities\\nof development in a home that lets its children\\ngrow, and suggests to them an ideal. With the\\nelimination of lust from the marriage relation\\nand the birth of a purpose in procreation, what\\nmay we not expect of our children and their\\nchildren? *The gods must walk the earth\\nagain/", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0155.jp2"}, "156": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER XVII.\\nfri:endship.\\nFRIENDSHIP, although the word is gener-\\nally used lightly and meanly enough, stands\\nfor a high ideal of human relationships in the\\nminds of those who have felt its need. It means\\nthe association of lives on the ideal side, mutual\\nencouragement in the realization of noble and\\nbeautiful purposes. Friendship is the relation-\\nship existing between two persons who esteem\\neach other so much that frank sincerity seems\\nworth while.\\nFriendship often exists without reference to\\nsex, but we are here chiefly concerned with it as\\na manifestation of the natural sympathy which\\nexists between boys and girls, and men and\\nwomen. Already we have asserted that true\\nlove, looking to marriage, must have its founda-\\ntions in friendship. The separation of the sexes\\nin childhood and youth when they are separated,^\\nand the unnatural and arbitrary relations exist-\\ning between them when they are not, are quite\\nplainly the result of a current belief in the impu-\\nrity of sexual relationships. The guardians of\\nrespectability aim to stave off, by one device qv\\n5^", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0156.jp2"}, "157": {"fulltext": "FRIENDSHIP. 153\\nanother, the immoral union of the sexes until it\\ncan be hidden under the cloak of holy matri-\\nmony. It can hardly be denied that if the dan-\\ngers of frivolity and its twin sister, sensuality,\\nwere overcome, boys and girls would be greatly\\nbenefited by freedom of association. The lack\\nof frank friendships in earlier years prepares\\nyoung men and women for the follies of love and\\nthe tragedies of marriage. Babies associate quite\\nfreely without respect to sex, but verj soon\\nshame enters like a wedge to separate the boys\\nand girls more and more during puberty and\\nadolescence, until at the age of twenty or twenty-\\nfive they fly into each other s arms in the bond\\nof marriage. False education makes the rela-\\ntions of youths and maidens both silly and insin-\\ncere. The simple fact of the monthly sickness,\\nwhich ought to be as well understood and as\\neasily referred to as the headache or a cut finger,\\nis so deeply hidden under the cloak of conven-\\ntional silence that girls would rather tell a lie\\nor rashly expose their health than give the true\\nreason why they wish to decline a social invita-\\ntion. Young people, even more than children,\\nneed each other s companionship. It is in the\\nbright days of youth that the foundations must\\nbe laid for community of ideals.\\nSociety is suspicious of friendships between\\nthe sexes. It is fancied that sooner pr later any", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0157.jp2"}, "158": {"fulltext": "154 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nagreeable companionship will be smitten by the\\nwand of love, and that the freedom and under-\\nstanding of the former relation will be replaced\\nby the constraint and the feverish mystery of a\\nrelation whose full meaning is hidden from the\\npair of lovers. lyove, meaning the desire to co-\\noperate in marriage, is a natural, though not an\\ninevitable, outgrowth of friendship between the\\nsexes. But falling in love is ordinarily the\\nresult of unnatural conditions. We can readily\\nsee how a youth and a maiden, normally envi-\\nroned, may grow to love each other. But this\\ninsanity of passion, whence comes it? A pure\\nideal of marriage would unshackle friendship\\nand banish the blind, furious god of love from\\nthe human pantheon. Hearts are not broken by\\nthe refusals of friendship. The bitter disap-\\npointments of love are the fruit of deception,\\ncruelty, or misunderstanding.\\nPerhaps even more than the unmarried, the\\nmarried need freedom of friendship. Marriage\\nis not a passive state, but an active co-operation;\\nand the moment that effort is relaxed, the work\\nof the home begins to fall behind. Married life\\nis no asylum for invalids. It is no palace car, in\\nwhich, if we have paid due regard to the pro-\\nprieties of the way station where the clergymen\\npunch the tickets, we need only lounge about in\\nluxury while the mighty engine of love pulls us", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0158.jp2"}, "159": {"fulltext": "PRIENDSHIP. 155\\nacross the wilderness of life. There is a ten-\\ndency on the part of young people to regard one\\nof their number who is fortunate enough to get\\nmarried as in some way lost.* It is perhaps\\nthe same feeling that may be noticed among the\\nmembers of a graduating class toward one of\\ntheir number who first secures a position. He is\\nlost to them that is, he is removed from\\ntheir circle of interest and expectancy and at\\nthe same time provided for. But many a\\nyoung teacher has discovered that getting a\\nposition is not half so hard as filling it. It is\\nthe same with our lost friends who are safely\\nmarried and bundled off on the journey of life:\\nthey are not removed from us; their larger\\ntasks still lie before them, and their need of\\nsympathy and counsel is unceasing.\\nIt is the orthodox doctrine of marriage, under\\nthe present regime of romance, that lovers and\\nmarried people should find in each other the\\nsufficient satisfaction of every legitimate want.\\nIt is supposed that, once a life-alliance has been\\nmade, the legitimate function of friendship is\\nfulfilled, and that straightway correspondences\\nmust be closed out and personal relationships\\nbroken off in order that love and duty may be\\nconcentrated in the home. Friendships may,\\nperhaps, be outgrown by a divergence in inter-\\nests and ideals but the mere fact of betrothal or", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0159.jp2"}, "160": {"fulltext": "156 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nmarriage furnishes the most absurd of reasons\\nfor cutting any vital cord of sympathy or\\nco-operation that may exist between any two\\npersons in the world. Who believes that mar-\\nriage will thrive on isolation? that a woman\\nwill be a better wife and mother if she enters\\ninto the soul life of only one man that a man\\nwill be a better husband and father if he cher-\\nishes the sympathy of only one woman True,\\nthe home calls for specialization of effort and\\ncare but every specialization brings with it\\nmore and more dependence on outside relation-\\nships. The household life will be self-consuming\\nif it is not fed by wider association. Every\\nfriendship of husband or wife will add riches to\\nthe home store.\\nFriendships are the spiritual doors and win-\\ndows of the home through which the universal\\nlight and air find entrance. In a healthy and\\ngrowing home nothing can be found better for\\nthe children than the loyal and intimate friend-\\nships which their parents have cherished from\\nearly life. Fathers and mothers who still have\\nfriends can understand much better the social\\ninterests of youth. The removal of the princi-\\npal source of conjugal jealousy would leave the\\nway open for friendship to contribute its princely\\ngifts to the enrichment of the home and the\\nculture of humanity.", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0160.jp2"}, "161": {"fulltext": "FRIENDSHIP. 157\\nFreedom of friendship would involve the hon-\\nesty now so generally absent in the relations of\\nthe sexes. The communications of young peo-\\nple in reference to each other are usually uncrit-\\nical, being either meaningless compliments, ill-\\ndisguised flattery, or impatient reproaches.\\nHow many of our disagreeable ways grow into\\ndeeply-rooted habits because we have had no\\nfriend sincere enough to point out to us our\\nfaults! Many of the blemishes of character,\\nespecially those more or less peculiar to one or\\nthe other sex, can be most easily seen and most\\nwisely criticized by persons of the opposite sex.\\nThus we find a new direction in which the re-\\ngeneration of marriage would transform the con-\\nditions of life and enable the individual to reap\\nthe full benefit of association.\\nFreedom implies responsibility, and the rela-\\ntions of friendship are as much subject to the\\nlaws of duty as is marriage itself. The laws\\nof friendship are great, austere, and eternal of\\none web with the laws of nature and of morals.\\nBut we have aimed at a swift and petty benefit,\\nto suck a sudden sweetness. We snatch at the\\nslowest fruit in the whole garden of God, which\\nmany summers and many winters must ripen.\\nWe seek our friend not sacredly but with an\\nadulterate passion which would appropriate him\\nto oursdves,", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0161.jp2"}, "162": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0162.jp2"}, "163": {"fulltext": "V.\\nSOCIAL COROIvLARIES.\\nThough the men and their possessions are to\\nbe increased at the same time^ the first object of\\nthought is always to be the multiplication of a\\nworthy people, When the men are true and\\ngood, and stand shoulder to shoulder, the strength\\nof a7iy nation is in its quantity of life, not in its\\nland nor gold y fohn Ruskin, in The Queen of\\nthe Air.\\n159", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0163.jp2"}, "164": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0164.jp2"}, "165": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER XVIII.\\nTHE FAMIIvY.\\nTHE world is filled with the clamor of re-\\nform. Current social opinion is saturated\\nwith moral pessimism. The cry of denunciation\\nis raised against the corruption of politics, the\\nunscrupulous selfishness of business, the hypoc-\\nrisy of religion, the degeneracy of morals, and\\nthe iconoclasm of the multitude. Yellow jour-\\nnalism is only one of the signs that, in spite of\\nour devotion to accurate science, and in spite of\\nour facilities for quick communication and thor-\\nough investigation, irresponsible lying was per-\\nhaps never more in vogue than now. A man\\ncan slander his fellows with practical impunity\\nbecause the conditions of modern life are such\\nthat relations are coming to be impersonal, and\\none who is disposed to speak evil of his neigh-\\nbors is not confronted by the unpleasant neces-\\nsity of meeting them face to face in social and\\nindustrial transactions. His business success in\\nmany cases does not depend at all upon their\\ngood win. Life in great cities is destroying\\nneighborhood unity. The ubiquity of street\\ncars and bicycles makes it possible for people to\\nII i6i", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0165.jp2"}, "166": {"fulltext": "1 62 rmCAL MARRIA GE.\\nlive anywhere within several miles of their work,\\nand meet down-town, not as neighbors, but as\\nfactors in the far-reaching mechanism of modern\\nsociety. All interests in a city verge toward the\\ncenter, and as business is managed on the clear-\\ning-house principle, we are saved the trouble of\\npersonally knowdng those with whom we have\\ndealings. This tendency of modern industry has\\neven invaded the home, and threatens to make it\\na mere lodging-place. However much we may\\nboast of the transformations wrought by our\\nmodern conquest of nature, we can not for a\\nmoment deny that grave dangers are inherent in\\nthe subordination of man to machinery and mo-\\ntion. In seeking to control nature, man has\\nbecome her slave.\\nTo propose that we set ourselves against the\\nascertained tendencies of modern industrial life,\\nwould, to many students of economics, seem the\\nsuggestion of an idle dreamer. Individual men\\nseem helplessly carried along by the movement\\nof their time. Who can set himself against the\\napparently irresistible sweep of economic forces\\nYet every social or moral reform is the result of\\nsuch resistance, the result of man s taking his\\ndestiny into his own hands and opposing con-\\nscious will to the blind tendencies of things. We\\ncan not sit tamely down and see our good ship\\ndriven upon the rocks without making an effort", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0166.jp2"}, "167": {"fulltext": "THE FAMILY. 1 63\\nto keep her in deep water or guide her into a\\nsafe harbor. The history of nations is not the\\nstory of mere fatalism. If it were, a curse\\nwould rest upon the generations that come after\\nus. The problem of man s future on earth is a\\nproblem of intelligence and of conscious, co-\\noperative effort. Railroads have not made them-\\nselves. The telephone is no self-announced\\nmessenger of modern business. And the same\\nhuman efforts that deliberately introduced these\\nsocial forces can check their evil tendencies.\\nTrue reform, like true charity, begins at home.\\nWe must set ourselves consciously to the task of\\nputting responsibility on every individual who\\nclaims freedom. We must deliberately endeavor\\nto enrich the personal relations of life, and compel\\nourselves to speak the truth to our neighbors in-\\nstead of telling lies about them. The place where\\nthe fight for responsibility and the cultivation\\nof personal relations must begin, is in the home,\\nfrom which it may be carried into the neighbor-\\nhood, the city, the State. The home is the last\\nstronghold of personality, and no effort must be\\nspared in its defense. lyCt us see some of the\\nways in which the marriage reforms suggested in\\nthis book would contribute to the redemption of\\nsociety from the ethical pessimism that is already\\nprevalent, and from the dangers of the further\\ndegeneracy that will inevitably come unless the", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0167.jp2"}, "168": {"fulltext": "1 64 ETHICAL MARRIAGE\\nevil tendencies of city civilization are checked.\\nWe may take up the principal political groups in\\nturn, beginning with the family, which occu-\\npies the smallest territorial division of the state.\\nThe acceptance of the co-operative social pur-\\nposes of marriage would give the essential unity\\nto home life that is needed to preserve it against\\nthe inroads of mechanical commercialism. Con-\\ntinence and the elimination of shame would\\nremove the chief obstacles now standing in the\\nway of purposive co-operation in the family.\\nThe family is a territorial group. The whole\\ninhabited area of a country is divided up into\\nminute, though unequal spheres of influence,\\nwhich we call homes. Political government is\\nbased on territorial jurisdiction, and the home is\\nthe smallest distinctive group to which functions\\nof government are assigned. The political sig-\\nnificance of the home organization is thus seen\\nto be fundamental and far-reaching.\\nNo place is more unsuitable than the home for\\nthe arbitrary exercise of authority. Every family\\nought to have frequent meetings for the discussion\\nof its ideals and purposes. These would be the\\nprimary deliberative assemblies for purposes of\\nlocal self-government. The recognition of duty\\nas the motive for marriage would make such a\\nfamily meeting as natural as it is necessary. In-\\ndeed, in the best homes we already have gather-\\nings for religious worship or self-culture. The", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0168.jp2"}, "169": {"fulltext": "THE PAMILV, 165\\ndaily meeting for Scripture reading and prayer\\nis not so prevalent as formerly, and in most cases\\nfollows methods that are too stereotyped to meet\\nthe needs of a progressive family. There ought\\nto be some regular course of reading, discussion,\\nwork, or play, that will for the time being con-\\ncentrate the interests of the family and make it\\na school in social development. But the work of\\nthe meeting should not become rigid and exclu-\\nsive, an end in itself. Its real purpose should\\nbe to bring the family together, and furnish an\\nopportunity for the development of the best type\\nof democracy in the home government.\\nWith a home life founded on purpose, and\\nproud of its function, the natural impulse of love\\nwould prompt each member of the family to lay\\nhis individual problems before all; and the best\\nwisdom of the group would be readily available\\nfor the use of the child in the emergencies that\\nso often confront a young life. In the home,\\naccording to the ideals of democracy, the small-\\nest child s reason should outweigh the biggest\\nman s notion. Children and parents alike must\\nlearn to govern themselves. The bringing up\\nof a child thus means a series of lessons in self-\\nrestraint, in watchfulness, in adherence to an\\nideal, for the parent even more than for the\\nchild. The family is the first great school of\\ncitizenship, and as its ideals are, so are the ideals\\nof the neighborhood, the city, and the state.", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0169.jp2"}, "170": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER XIX.\\nTHE NKIGHBORHOOD.\\nIT is possible in New York City for two men to\\nlive on the opposite sides of a house- wall for\\nmany years without knowing each other s name.\\nSome people prefer life in a metropolis because\\nthere they can find the deepest solitude, or be-\\ncause they wish to follow their individual inter-\\nests in choosing associates. The rich can get\\naway from the poor, the moral from the immoral,\\nthe religious from the profane. This opportunity\\nto escape the annoyances and responsibilities of a\\nvaried acquaintance and association may be con-\\nducive to the comfort of selfish men and women,\\nbut it certainly is not favorable to the symmetri-\\ncal development of social character. A man s\\nneighbors are naturally the people who live\\nnearest to him, not the members of his church or\\nhis secret society who are scattered all over the\\ncity; and, though association according to free\\nchoice may be invaluable for the organization of\\nspecial interests, yet this organization can not\\nwith safety to the state be permitted to supersede\\nthe organization of local interests in the neigh-\\nborhood.\\n1 66", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0170.jp2"}, "171": {"fulltext": "THE NEIGHBORHOOD. 167\\nNothing hinders neighborhood life so much as\\nunhappy family life. A home in which e very-\\ncloset conceals a skeleton is not a place in which\\nneighbors can spend a pleasant evening. The\\npurer the home, and the better it is organized for\\nthe culture of its members, the larger factor it\\nwill be in the maintenance of a healthy commu-\\nnity life. A home that has ideals will desire to\\nextend them, and there is no way of doing this\\nso effectively as by letting one s neighbors see\\ninto the beautiful relationships of a home situated\\nin their midst. Too many people try to reform\\nthe world from a distance. Society can not be\\nupraised except by the upward movement of its\\nindividuals and its families. In our progress\\ntoward better things we are not hurried along\\nby a lightning express while we sleep. An\\nideal home extends its influence in every direc-\\ntion, raising the ideals of other homes, helping to\\neducate the parents and children of the neighbor-\\nhood, bringing the neighbors together in social\\nrelations, and leading the way in every enterprise\\nof worthy social effort.\\nEvery community needs a meeting-place with\\nadequate facilities for neighborhood gatherings.\\nAlthough the church has often in rural communi-\\nties served this end reasonably well, yet in cities\\nit is not usually a neighborhood institution, while\\nin any case its religious or denominational asso-", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0171.jp2"}, "172": {"fulltext": "1 68 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nciations make a large share of the community\\nhesitate to use its hospitality. What is needed\\nis a building equipped with books and art, games\\nand club-rooms, parlors and lecture-rooms, where\\nany responsible member of the community may\\ngo to meet his neighbors for any social purpose,\\nand where the advantages of culture will be\\nequalized to all who can appreciate them. The\\nexperiments carried on in the way of institutional\\nchurches and social settlements show that the\\nneighborhood problem is not altogether insoluble\\neven in the largest cities. With a suitable meet-\\ning-place and a little intelligent effort on the part\\nof socially conscious households, the common in-\\nterests of local residence will resist the exclusive\\ntendencies of modern life toward organization on\\na large scale.\\nIt seems more than likely that the demand for\\na neighborhood meeting-place and a better organ-\\nization of neighborhood life can best be met\\nthrough the public schools. One of the ideals of\\neducation is to bring the^home into closer touch\\nwith the schools. The school building and the\\nlocal educational interest already furnish a natural\\nopportunity for the cultivation of neighborhood\\nunity. With the more general recognition of the\\nnecessity of instruction in the physiology of sex,\\nit will devolve upon the public school-teacher to\\nsupplement deficient home instruction in this", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0172.jp2"}, "173": {"fulltext": "THE NEIGHBORHOOD. 169\\nmatter, and thus the family will be joined to the\\nneighborhood by one more link of common in-\\nterest. Furthermore, the realization of demo-\\ncratic principles in the home would react upon\\nthe school, and both necessitate and make possible\\nthe granting to the pupils of J more responsibility\\nin self -government/^ Above all else the new\\nideals of family life would react upon the neigh-\\nborhood and the school through the substitution\\nof social duty for mere personal convenience as a\\nmotive to action. Every neighborhood would\\nthen care for its own destitute without encourag-\\ning fraudulent pauperism; would maintain its own\\ninstitutions of culture without having to resort to\\nthe charitable foundations of unearned riches; and\\nwould secure its own local improvements through\\nunited effort and responsible representation in the\\ndeliberations of the larger social group.", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0173.jp2"}, "174": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER XX.\\nTHE) CITY.\\nWEALTH and population have during the\\nnineteenth century been rapidly drifting\\ninto cities. This movement is universal among\\nthe great progressive nations of the world, and\\nwe have every reason to believe that cities will\\nkeep on growing for a long time to come. In\\nall probability, within another fifty years half of\\nthe people and the bulk of the wealth of Europe\\nand America will be in cities. The city is the\\ngreat objective fact in our civilization. The con-\\nditions of urban life have often been looked upon\\nwith suspicion by those who were most anxious\\nfor the welfare of the nations. The aggregation\\nof ignorant and foreign-born citizens, the con-\\ngestion of homes, the increase of crime, vice,\\nand pauperism, the absence of the healthful\\nenvironment of country life, the separation of\\nrich and poor, the corruption of politics; all\\nthese have been pointed out as indications that\\nthe American city is the sore spot in our national\\nlife, threatening its physical welfare, its moral\\nintegrity, and its intellectual vigor. Yet the\\ngrowth of cities goes on unchecked, and the\\n170", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0174.jp2"}, "175": {"fulltext": "THE C/TV. 171\\nlife of the nation is inextricably involved in\\ntheir life. In the cities civilization must over-\\ncome its foes or be overcome by them/^\\nOne of the greatest dangers to the vitality of\\nthe people is the vice that flourishes in cities.\\nDrunkenness, gambling, prostitution, indecent\\ntheatrical exhibitions, yellow journalism, and\\nall the long category of vicious activities arising\\nfrom the want of moral restraint in public opin-\\nion, find their most favorable soil in cities. The\\nfundamental cause of this is the destruction of\\nneighborhood life already referred to; for, with-\\nout neighborhood life the vicious classes can es-\\ncape most of the restraint that would come from\\nthe fear of giving offense to those acquainted\\nwith them. We must, therefore, look for the\\nmoral salvation of cities in the re-establishment\\nof healthy local associations. The part that the\\nfamily has to play in accomplishing this has al-\\nready been suggested.\\nBut continence in marriage would tend to di-\\nminish vice in a much more direct way. Pros-\\ntitution is the logical outcome of sensual ideals.\\nIf indulgence of passion is freely permitted within\\nthe bond of matrimony, it is difficult to see why\\nthe same indulgence, when precautions are taken\\nto avoid offspring, should not be permitted in\\nmany cases to the unmarried. Furthermore, the\\ncultivation of passion through the influence of", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0175.jp2"}, "176": {"fulltext": "1 7^ THICAL MARRlA CE,\\nshame and ignorance makes young men inconti-\\nnent and fills the brothels. The elimination of\\nshame in the best families would tend to set a\\nnew standard for art and public amusements.\\nIndecency would not be so often tolerated in lit-\\nerature, in the theater, on the bill-boards, and in\\nsocial gatherings. Nudeness does not constitute\\nindecency. The unclothed human form may be\\nas chaste as driven snow, while a look, a grim-\\nace, an attitude, a concealment, may be sugges-\\ntive of sensuality, and thus become grossly\\ndemoralizing.\\nThe saloon is now the poor man^s club. It\\nis the most generally available neighborhood\\nmeeting-place that the city has. This is doubt-\\nless the secret of much drunkenness and crime.\\nThe liquor traffic caters to the social instinct of\\nman, and is thus enabled to multiply its victims\\nand fill its coffers. If the saloon had a rival\\nmeeting-place, intemperance would be greatly\\nchecked. And still more would the adoption\\nin virtuous families of a diet favorable to con-\\ntinence diminish both directly and by social in-\\nfluence the consumption of intoxicants and other\\nstimulants.\\nFinally, the great problem of poverty would\\nbe solved if the unwelcome children were never\\nborn, and the neighborhood realized its unity\\nand its responsibility for its own inhabitants.", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0176.jp2"}, "177": {"fulltext": "THE CITY. 173\\nThe incorporation of a city provides in the po-\\nlitical system for a much more elaborate co-oper-\\nation than is possible under the ordinary forms of\\nlocal government. The city has needs by reason\\nof its very existence. The bounties of nature\\nare no longer within reach of the individual, but\\nmust be brought to him by vast co-operative en-\\nterprises. For the protection of property, life,\\nand health; for the construction of bridges,\\nstreets, and other avenues of travel and trafl c;\\nfor the supply of water and light; for the re-\\nmoval of refuse; for the maintenance of parks,\\nmuseums, and libraries; and for the performance\\nof many other public services, the citizens have\\nto unite their efforts.\\nIn cities the environment of life from the cra-\\ndle to the grave is artificial, the handiwork of\\nman. Thus the opportunity and the necessity\\nfor co-operation open the way for the salvation\\nof the city from the dangers that beset its life.\\nIn this matter the acceptance of social responsi-\\nbility in the home would be of incalculable serv-\\nice; for the man who procreates, not accidentally,\\nbut purposefully, admits that he is answerable\\nfor his child* s opportunities. He sees that the\\ngood work of the family may be largely counter-\\nacted by a vicious or unhealthy city environment.\\nHe is led to see that if he would protect his own\\nchild he must, as a citizen, proclaim the city s", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0177.jp2"}, "178": {"fulltext": "1 74 E THICAL MARRIA GE.\\nresponsibility for the conditions into which the\\nnext generation will be born. Shortsightedness\\nand the inadequate recognition of the duty which\\nthe present owes to the future are responsible for\\nmuch that is worst in existing municipal condi-\\ntions. The irresponsibility of wealth is most\\nmanifest in the centers of trade and manufac-\\ntures. At its base is the same thirst for present\\nindividual satisfaction that runs riot in sensual\\nmarriage. The realization of duty in one depart-\\nment of life will inevitably make the whole of life\\nmore responsible. Continence favors not only\\nself-restraint but also simplicity. Responsibility\\nfor children is conducive to a sense of wider so-\\ncial responsibility. The possessor of wealth or\\nwisdom or any other good will come to see that\\nhe holds it in trust, that he is a member of an\\norganism, that if his neighbor suffers injury, he\\nhimself will receive harm, that the richness of\\nhis life depends not on his possessions, but on his\\nsocial function loyally fulfilled. With the idea\\nof responsibility for the welfare of children and\\nfor the right use of riches, a new ideal of civic\\ngreatness would come into the foreground.\\nHealth, cleanliness, beauty, simplicity, purity,\\nfreedom, life, would take the place of smoke,\\nfilth, vice, corruption, and sheer bigness and\\npopulousness.", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0178.jp2"}, "179": {"fulltext": "THE CITV, 175\\n^^A great city is that which has the greatest men and\\nwomen.\\nIf it be a few ragged huts, it is still the greatest city in\\nthe whole world.\\nThe place where a great city stands is not the place of\\nstretch d wharves, docks, manufadtures, deposits of\\nproduce merely,\\nNor the place of ceaseless salutes of newcomers or the\\nanchor-lifters of the departing,\\nNor the place of the tallest and costliest buildings or\\nshops selling goods from the rest of the earth,\\nNor the place of the best libraries and schools, nor the\\nplace where money is plentiest,\\nNor the place of the most numerous population.\\nWhere the city stands with the brawniest breed of ora-\\ntors and bards,\\nWhere the city stands that is belov*d by these and loves\\nthem in return and understands them.\\nWhere no monuments exist to heroes but in the common\\nwords and deeds.\\nWhere thrift is in its place, and prudence is in its place,\\nWhere the men and women think lightly of the laws,\\nWhere the slave ceases, and the master of slaves ceases,\\nWhere the populace rise at once against the never-ending\\naudacity of elected persons,\\nWhere children are taught to be laws to themselves and\\nto depend on themselves,\\nWhere women walk in public processions in the streets\\nthe same as men,", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0179.jp2"}, "180": {"fulltext": "176 ETHtCAL MARRlACR.\\nWhere they enter the public assembly and take places\\nthe same as the men;\\nWhere the city of the faithf ulest friends stands,\\nWhere the city of the cleanliness of the sexes stands,\\nWhere the city of the healthiest fathers stands,\\nWhere the city of the best-bodied mothers stands\\nThere the great city stands.*", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0180.jp2"}, "181": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER XXI.\\nTHE STATK.\\nIN all struggles for political and social better-\\nment we find two methods employed, which\\nsometimes come into rivalry, one the appeal to\\nthe conscience of the individual citizen, the other\\nthe appeal to the organized forces of society. It\\nis said by some that the laws are good enough,\\nbut what we need is good men in ofl ce. Others\\nstrive for a reform in the laws, seeming to think\\nthat good citizenship can be made to order. The\\ntrue way of reform is less simple than either of\\nthese alternatives. We must have both good\\nlaws and good oiBficers, both organization and\\nintegrity.\\nThese two requisites for a nation s success in\\npolitical life find their elements in the intelli-\\ngence and conscience of individual citizens. A\\ncomprehension of the duties of citizenship with-\\nout the will to fulfill them tends only to deprav-\\nity and degeneration. The desire to be faithful\\nto one s country without any knowledge of how\\nto perform social duties leads only to blundering\\nand deeper misery. The patriotism that says,\\nMy country, right or wrong! while having\\n12 177", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0181.jp2"}, "182": {"fulltext": "lyS BthiCal marriage,\\nin it an element necessary to national integrity,\\nsprings from the selfishness of the individual,\\nwhich makes him always affirm that he is in the\\nright, and always obey the blind instinct of self-\\ndefense; it springs from the narrowness of family\\npride which makes kinsmen hasten to each oth-\\ner* s aid in every scheme for self-aggrandizement\\nand in every effort to evade disagreeable penal-\\nties; it springs from the civic egotism which\\nprompts every man to boast of his own city s\\nsuperiority and enthusiastically ignore the facts\\nof misgovernment, vice, and uncleanness which\\nmay be patent to any intelligent observer. Pa-\\ntriotism in our country often runs into bombast.\\nTrue, there are plenty of our young men who\\nstand ready to risk their lives in battle whenever\\ntheir country may be at war. But the virtues\\nof patriotism tell most in time of peace. The\\nfirst great duty of the patriot is to be a well-gov-\\nerned, self-supporting man or woman. The\\nsecond great duty is to stand ready to participate\\nintelligently and faithfully in social co-operation,\\nfamily life, industrial enterprise, educational\\nwork, and the far-reaching tasks of political\\ndemocracy. National glory can not long conceal\\ncivic corruption. National wealth can not long\\nmake the world oblivious of the indigence of the\\npopulace. Conscience, which moves the citizen\\nto be loyal to his duty, and intelligence, which", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0182.jp2"}, "183": {"fulltext": "THE STATE, 1 79\\nenables him to co-operate with his fellows for the\\nattainment of well-considered ends, are the indis-\\npensable conditions of a vigorous and worthy\\nnational life.\\nIt is in the family that the nation is bom and\\nbred. The transformation of family life in the\\ndirections of purity, purposiveness, simplicity,\\nand democratic organization would transform the\\nstate likewise. But we must admit the hopeless-\\nness of any immediate transformation in the\\ngreat majority of families. Of what use, then,\\nwill the promulgation of the doctrines of this\\nbook be to the state In this fast age we clamor\\nfor results; we are not satisfied with the mills\\nof the gods they grind too slowly. Per-\\nhaps the greatest obstacle to the acceptance of\\nprocreation as a method of political reform is the\\nlength of time required to make our efforts\\nwidely felt. When the daily newspapers appear\\nat intervals of a few hours with the news of the\\nworld s doings, when the blunders of a few years\\nin a city s government may doom future genera-\\ntions to wretched conditions of life, unchange-\\nable except by almost impossible reconstructions;\\nwhen great nations fight and the map of the\\nworld is changed in a few months, we are loth\\nto wait upon the tardy processes of nature. But\\nthere is no other way to make men than by pro-\\ncreation. Haste makes waste is as true a", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0183.jp2"}, "184": {"fulltext": "m\\n1 80 ETHICAL MARRIAGE.\\nproverb when applied to national development as\\nwhen applied to domestic economy. It is to be\\nnoted, however, that leaders are as necessary as\\nresolute, sturdy followers; and in the training of\\nleaders the pioneer ethical families fulfill their\\nmost important function. The struggle for social\\nregeneration must be carried on all along the\\nline; the individual conscience must be quick-\\nened and scientific co-operation encouraged; the\\nslow way of making good citizens by the lifelong\\nwork of the family must never be lost sight of,\\nwhile the more rapid methods of education and\\npolitical reform are being used wherever there is\\nopportunity.\\nA change in family ideals would mean a change\\nin national ideals. The ideal of service would\\nreplace that of self-aggrandizement. Our pur-\\npose as a nation would not be to inflate ourselves\\nwith riches or to make the world fear our bullets\\nand our warships. Every nation has an oppor-\\ntunity for world-service through the contribu-\\ntion of its perfected character and institutions to\\nthe world-life. The days of national isolation\\nare past. The organization of science, commu-\\nnication, commerce, and social reform is becom-\\ning international. The new expansion policy of\\nthe United States, coupled with the prospect of\\na better integration of the Anglo-Saxon race for\\nits work of civilizing the world, stands side by", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0184.jp2"}, "185": {"fulltext": "THR STATE, l8l\\nside with the Russian czar s international dis-\\narmament conference, as a portent of acknowl-\\nedged national responsibility in world- develop-\\nment. The nations must look to the bulwarks\\nof their strength. Homes, neighborhoods, cities,\\nare the living constituent elements of every state.\\nIf they rot in sensuality, or harden into mere\\nproducing mechanisms, the proudest people s\\nsovereign hand will be nerveless for the grasp of\\nits world-problem.\\nTake up the White Man s burden\\nNo iron rule of kings,\\nBut toil of serf and sweeper\\nThe tale of common things.\\nThe ports ye shall not enter,\\nThe roads ye shall not tread,\\nGo, make them with your living.\\nAnd mark them with your dead.", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0185.jp2"}, "186": {"fulltext": "CHAPTER XXll.\\nHUMANITY.\\nUNCONQUERABIvE time itself works on\\nunceasingly, bringing the nations nearer to\\none another, and awakening the universal con-\\nsciousness of the community of mankind; and\\nthis is the natural preparation for the organization\\nof the world. It is no mere matter of accident\\nthat modern discoveries and numerous new\\nmethods of communication altogether serve this\\nend, that the whole science of modern times fol-\\nlows this impulse and belongs in the first place\\nto humanity, and only in a subordinate way to\\nparticular peoples, while a number of hindrances\\nand barriers that lay between nations are disap-\\npearing. Even at the present day all Europe\\nfeels every disturbance in any particular state as\\nan evil in which she has to suffer, and what\\nhappens at her extremest, limits immediately\\nawakens universal interest. The spirit of Europe\\nalready turns its regards to the circuit of the\\nglobe, and the Aryan race feels itself called to\\nmanage the world.\\nThe conception of Humanity, a world-state,\\nopens to us a vision of opportunity and duty that\\n182", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0186.jp2"}, "187": {"fulltext": "HUMANITY, 183\\ncalls us to a new religion, a religion of this\\nworld. Other-worldly religions are based upon\\nthe conception that this life is an evil, a limita-\\ntion upon the soul of man, and that his supreme\\nduty is to free himself from the bonds of being\\nand merge himself into the Universal I^ife from\\nwhich he sprang. Brahmanism and Buddhism\\nin the East were the outcome of social conditions,\\nand embodied in their precepts and their purposes\\nthat weariness of life characterizing peoples which\\nare unable to attain a high degree of social organ-\\nization, and which are consequently, subject to\\nthe caprices of nature, war, and oppression. The\\nprogressive nations of the world with their ca-\\npacity for organized effort, need first of all a reli-\\ngion of humanity, whose purpose shall be the\\nperfection of human society and the development\\nof the highest type of men. We must have a\\nreligion of democracy, a religion that will frankly\\nrecognize the worthfulness of this life, and that\\nwill teach us to set manfully about the work of\\nmaking it more worth living. One of the tenets\\nof the new religion will surely be the duty of\\nresponsible procreation, made possible by a life\\ntemperate in all things, and accomplished by the\\nco-operation of men and women in homes that\\nhave ideals.\\nThere can be no ideal society without ideal\\nmen; and for the production of those we require", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0187.jp2"}, "188": {"fulltext": "1 84 ETHICAL MARRIAGE,\\nnot only insight but a motive power; fire as well\\nas light. Perhaps a philosophic understanding\\nof our social problems is not even the chief want\\nof our times. We need prophets as well as\\nteachers, men like Carlyle or Ruskin or Tolstoi,\\nwho are able to add for us a new severity to con-\\nscience or a new breadth to duty. Perhaps we\\nneed a new Christ. We want at least an acces-\\nsion of the Christlike spirit the spirit of self-\\ndevotion to ideal ends applying itself persist-\\nently in all the departments of life, and in the\\nmidst of all the complexities of our modern civili-\\nzation.\\nIt is the despair of social reform that co-opera-\\ntion, except for strictly selfish purposes, is a\\ndifficult thing to bring about. Kvery reformer\\npulls his own way while the enemies of progress\\nand freedom organize compact machines\\nwhose motive force is money or other worldly\\ngain. With the reform of marriage, conditions\\nare quite different. For the building of an ideal\\nhome the co-operation of two persons only is\\nprimarily required. However defective our laws\\nmay be, they do not present any great positive\\nhindrances to right conduct on the part of those\\nwho have the will to act rightly. A young man\\nor woman, therefore, who is eager to do some-\\nthing for humanity, does not need to wait until a", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0188.jp2"}, "189": {"fulltext": "HUMANITY. 185\\nmultitude are ready to band together for the\\npursuit of ideal ends, but may at once in the\\npreparation for marriage and in its consummation\\nin parenthood contribute most unerringly to the\\nsocial and political welfare of his country and the\\nworld.", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0189.jp2"}, "190": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0190.jp2"}, "191": {"fulltext": "NOTES.\\nNote page p. The celibacy of the priesthood was\\nnot an original idea with Roman Catholic Christians.\\nFive hundred years before Christ, Buddha had founded\\na religion in India which enjoined chastity upon its\\npriests, and the influence of Hindu and Persian asceti-\\ncism can be traced through the first centuries of the\\nChristian religion.\\nWith the conquests of Alexander, Judaism was\\nexposed to new influences, and was brought into relation\\nat once with Grecian thought and with the subtle mys-\\nticism of India, with which intercourse became frequent\\nunder the Greek Bmpire. Beyond the Indus the Sankhya\\nphilosophy was already venerable, which taught the\\nnothingness of life, and that the supreme good consisted\\nin the absolute victory over all human wants and desires.\\nAlready Buddha had reduced his philosophy into a\\nsystem of religion, the professors of which were bound\\nto chastity a rule impossible of observance by the\\nworld at large, but which became obligatory upon its\\ninnumerable priests and monks, when it spread and estab-\\nlished itself as a church, thus furnishing the prototype\\nwhich was subsequently copied by Roman Christianity.\\nHenry C, Lea, in Historical Sketch of Sacerdotal\\nCelibacy in the Christian Church, p. 2j,\\nThere is a great difference between the degrees of\\nearnestness with which men exert themselves in the\\nrepression of their sensual passions, and in the amount\\nof indulgence which is conceded to their lower nature;\\nbut there is no difference in the direction of the virtuous\\n187", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0191.jp2"}, "192": {"fulltext": "1 88 1^0 TES.\\nimpulse. While, too, in the case of adultery, and in the\\nproduction of children, questions of interest and utility\\ndo undoubtedly intervene, we are conscious that the\\ngeneral progress turns upon an entirely different order of\\nideas. The feeling of all men and the language of all\\nnations, the sentiment, which though often weakened, is\\nnever wholly effaced, that this appetite, even in its most\\nlegitimate gratification, is a thing to be veiled and with-\\ndrawn from sight, all that is known under the names of\\ndecency and indecency, concur in proving that we have\\nan innate, intuitive, instinctive perception that there is\\nsomething degrading in the sensual part of our nature,\\nsomething to which a feeling of shame is naturally\\nattached, something jars with our conception of purity,\\nsomething that we could not with any propriety ascribe\\nto an all holy being. It is this feeling that\\nlies at the root of the whole movement I have described,\\nand it is this, too, that produced that sense of the\\nsanctity of perfect continence which the Catholic Church\\nhas so warmly encouraged, but which may be traced\\nthrough the most distant ages, and the most varied\\ncreeds. W, E. H, Lecky, in History of European\\nMorals, VoL p, io8.\\nNote 2, page 15, Mutual desire and agreement are not\\ngenerally regarded as sufl cient ground for divorce,\\nalthough separation of husband and wife is often legally\\naccomplished where unfaithfulness, or adultery, is\\nnot proved.\\nThough marriage involves, for its inception, the\\nhighest exercise of unbiased volition, the existence of\\nthe state of marriage after its creation excludes, with\\nequal peremptoriness the notion of its dissolubility at\\nthe bidding of license or caprice on either side, or even\\non both sides. So soon as once the state of marriage is", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0192.jp2"}, "193": {"fulltext": "NOTES. 189\\ncreated, the parties to it are no longer in a condition of\\nresponsibility only to one another. Beside them and\\nabove them is the community to which they belong.\\n**The community not only represents the claims of\\npossible children and relations of all sorts, deeply con-\\ncerned in the fixity and permanence of bonds which\\ncontrol their own lives, but has an interest peculiarly its\\nown. It is of the utmost concern to the community that\\nthe family groups which compose it, in the last analysis,\\nshould be definite and unmutilated that the utmost\\nopportunity should be afforded for the quiet and orderly\\ndevelopment of the affections and of the sentiments of\\nmutual trust and dependence which are only brought to\\nmaturity in the lifelongohome that the family should\\nbe a school for the restraint of passion, for self -disci-\\npline, and for conciliatory self-surrender, not an arena\\nfor the practice of irresponsible self-indulgence that, in\\nfine, in the family the social capacities should gain pre-\\ndominance over the centrifugal individualism of sav-\\nagery, and the state itself should be at once reflected and\\nanticipated in its most ubiquitous and natural type.\\nSheldon Amos, in The Science of Politics, pp.\\ni6s, 166,\\nNote s, page 16, *The mystical character which the\\nchurch imparted to marriage has been extremely influ-\\nential. Partly by raising marriage into a sacrament, and\\npartly by representing it as, in some mysterious and not\\nvery definable sense, an image of the union of Christ\\nwith his church, a feeling was fostered that a lifelong\\nunion of one man and one woman is, under all circum-\\nstances, the single form of intercourse between the sexes\\nthat is not illegitimate, and this conviction has acquired\\nthe force of a primal moral intuition, W* Hn\\nLecky, loc. cit Vol, II, p. ^6j,", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0193.jp2"}, "194": {"fulltext": "IQO NOTES.\\nNote 4y page Marriage is not only a relation be-\\ntween persons, and so a mutual contract; it is also a rela-\\ntion toward society and the state, and therefore a social\\nand civil contract. B. Franklin^ D. Z in Marriage\\nand Divorce y^ p, 128,\\nA social relation, say the relation of husband and\\nwife, would be an unsanctified unity of repellent atoms\\nthrough desires which turn them into external means of\\neach other s life, if those who participate in it were not,\\nby the fact of their union, brought into the conscious\\npresence of something higher than their individuality.\\nIn fact, in this most direct union of individuals, nature\\ngenerally takes care of this, by awaking affections which\\nmake the interests of the children (who represent the\\ncontinued unity of the family) predominant over the\\nseptate interests of the heads of the family. Edward\\nCaird, in Critical Philosophy of Immanuel Kant,^^\\nVol. Ily p. 402,\\nNote 5, page 20. In ancient India both Brahmanism\\nand Buddhism postulated the worthlessness of life in this\\nworld. Yet the laws of Manu, which were recognized as\\nauthoritative by the believers in Brahmanism, made mar-\\nriage and reproduction a duty. This is accounted for by\\nthe existence of ancestor worship and the consequent\\nnecessity of a man s having a son to honor his spirit after\\ndeath. Furthermore, procreation was rendered less\\nresponsible by the belief in the transmigration of souls,\\non account of which a child was not considered to be\\nin reality a new being, but simply the embodiment of\\nsome soul making the endless journey through the cycle\\nof existences. Buddha did not deny transmigration, but\\nproclaimed that the supreme end of life was to get out of\\nthe cycle, and lose one s self in Nirvana, which, to the\\nwestern mind at least, means annihilation. But suicide", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0194.jp2"}, "195": {"fulltext": "MOTES. 191\\nwould not accomplish the desired end; it would only\\nthrust the soul back into a new chain of transmigrations.\\nAccording to Buddha the only way to escape from exist-\\nence was to think one s way out of it. Only the elect\\nfew, indeed only those who had already nearly reached\\nthe end of the cycle of existences, could hope to attain\\nNirvana at once. Upon these, the priests of Buddhism,\\ncelibacy was enjoined. They in their own lives were\\nsupposed to attain the summit of existence, the complete\\nfulfillment of life ending in the annihilation of individ-\\nual consciousness, and, therefore, to them offspring were\\nunnecessary and impossible.\\nNote 6y page ^5. An Essay on the Principle of\\nPopulation, by Rev. T. R. Malthus, first published in\\n1798. Malthus s principal idea was that population\\nnaturally tends to increase by geometrical progression,\\nwhile the means of subsistence can not possibly increase,\\nin the long run, faster than by arithmetical progression.\\nThe obvious conclusion from these premises was that the\\nincrease of population must be checked by moral re-\\nstraint, vice, or misery. The moral restraint advo-\\ncated by Malthus was the postponement of marriage until\\ncomparatively late in life, and strict chastity outside of\\nthe marriage relation. He says, p. 404: It is not required\\nof us to act from motives to which we are unaccustomed;\\nto pursue a general good which we may not distinctly\\ncomprehend, or the effect of which may be weakened by\\ndistance and diffusion. The happiness of the whole is to\\nbe the result of the happiness of individuals, and to begin\\nfirst with them. No co-operation is required. Every\\nstep tells. He who performs his duty faithfully will\\nreap the full fruits of it, whatever may be the number of\\nothers who fail. This duty is intelligible to the humblest\\ncapacity. It is merely that he is not to bring beings into", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0195.jp2"}, "196": {"fulltext": "iQi NOTMS.\\nthe world for whom he can not find the means of support.\\nWhen once this subject is cleared from the obscurity\\nthrown over it by parochial laws and private benevolence,\\nevery man must feel the strongest conviction of such an\\nobligation. If he can not support his children, they must\\nstarve; and if he marry in the face of a fair probability\\nthat he shall not be able to support his children, he is\\nguilty of all the evils which he thus brings upon himself,\\nhis wife, and his offspring. It is clearly his interest, and\\nwill tend greatly to promote his happiness, to defer marry-\\ning, till by industry and economy he is in a capacity to\\nsupport the children that he may reasonably expect from\\nhis marriage; and as he can not in the meantime gratify\\nhis passions without violating an express command of\\nGod, and running a great risk of injuring himself or\\nsome of his fellow creatures, considerations of his own\\ninterest and happiness will dictate to him the strong obli-\\ngation to a moral conduct while he remains unmarried.\\nMalthus s chief error seems to have been his faihire to\\nrecognize the possibility of a voluntary limitation of off-\\nspring after marriage. He would have all men wait\\nbefore marrying until they have accumulated enough\\nproperty to insure their ability to support as many chil-\\ndren as they may reasonably expect from their late\\nmarriages. ^Evidently he had not got beyond the current\\nconception of marriage, which is, by definition, a state\\nof habitual and frequently recurring sexual intercourse\\nbetween a man and a woman, no one act of which has\\nany conscious and definite relation to procreation, but as\\na general result of which children, few or many, are born\\nunder the providence of God. In all cases the individual\\nshould, of course, limit the number of his children to\\nsuch an extent that he would be able to care for them.\\nThis duty, however, ought not to necessitate harmful", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0196.jp2"}, "197": {"fulltext": "NOTES, 193\\ndelay in the formation of a home. Moreover, applying\\nMalthus^s own ethical rule there would be no reason from\\nthe social standpoint why a family should not contain\\na dozen children if their procreation and rearing could be\\nproperly accomplished without too seriously limiting the\\nlives of the parents. One thing Malthus certainly failed\\nto urge, namely, that social obligation requires the pru-\\ndent and fit couple to have children^ and, within reason-\\nable limits, to have as many as they can properly care for.\\nJohn Stuart Mill represents a great advance beyond\\nMalthus in the ethics of marriage. In his Principles of\\nPolitical Economy, Book II, chapter XIII, section i, he\\nsays: One can not wonder that silence on this great\\ndepartment of human duty should produce unconscious-\\nness of moral obligations, when it produces oblivion of\\nphysical facts. That it is possible to delay marriage, and\\nto live in abstinence while unmarried, most people are\\nwilling to allow but when persons are once married, the\\nidea in this country never seems to enter anyone s mind\\nthat having or not having a family, or the number of\\nwhich it shall consist, is at all amenable to their own con-\\ntrol. One would imagine that children were rained down\\nupon married people, direct from heaven, without their\\nbeing art or part in the matter; that it was really, as the\\ncommon phrases have it, God s will, and not their own,\\nwhich decided the niunbers of their offspring.\\nOther passages from J. S. Mill s Political Economy\\nare the following:\\n**One of the most binding of all obligations, that of\\nnot bringing children into the world unless they can be\\nmaintained in comfort, and brought up with a likelihood\\nof its continuance, is both disregarded in practice and\\nmade light of in theory in a manner disgraceful to human\\nintelligence. Book II) chapter section j.", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0197.jp2"}, "198": {"fulltext": "194 NOTES.\\nEveryone has a right to live. We will suppose this\\ngranted. But no one has a right to bring creatures into\\nlife, to be supported by other people. Whoever means to\\nstand upon the first of these rights must renounce all\\npretension to the last. Yet there are abundance of\\nwriters and public speakers, including many of most\\nostentatious pretensions to high feeling, whose views of\\nlife are so truly brutish, that they see hardship in pre-\\nventing paupers from breeding hereditary paupers in the\\nvery workhouse itself/* Book II, chapter XII, sec-\\nHon 2,\\nDiscussions on the condition of the laborers, lamenta-\\ntions over its wretchedness, denunciations of all who are\\nsupposed to be indifferent to it, projects of one kind or\\nanother for improving it, were in no country and no time\\nof the world so rife as at present; but there is a tacit\\nagreement to ignore totally the law of wages, or to dis-\\nmiss it in a parenthesis, with such terms as hard-hearted\\nMalthusianism, as if it were not a thousand times more\\nhard-hearted to tell human beings that they may, than\\nthat they may not, call into existence swarms of creatures\\nwho are sure to be miserable, and who are most likely to\\nbe depraved; and forgetting that the conduct, which it is\\nreckoned so cruel to disapprove, is a degrading slavery to\\na brute instinct in one of the persons concerned, and\\nmost commonly, in the other, helpless submission to a\\nrevolting abuse of power.* Book II, chapter XI sec-\\ntion 6,\\nAnd Herbert Spencer, in Principles of Kthics, Vol.\\nI, p. 550, says: If improvident marriages are to be repro-\\nbated if to bring children into the world when there\\nwill probably be no means of maintaining any, is a comrse\\ncalling for condemnation; then there must be condemna-\\ntion for those who bring many children into the world", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0198.jp2"}, "199": {"fulltext": "NOTES. 195\\nwhen they have means of properly rearing only a few.\\nImprovidence after marriage can not be considered right\\nif improvidence before marriage is considered wrong/\\nNote 7, page 27. Pp. 339-348. Mr. Galton says, p.\\n343 It is a maxim of Mai thus that the period of\\nmarriage ought to be delayed in order that the earth may\\nnot be overcrowded by a population for whom there is\\nno place at the great table of nature. If this doctrine\\ninfluenced all classes alike, I should have nothing to say\\nabout it here, one way or another, for it would hardly\\naffect the discussions in this book; but as it is put for-\\nward as a rule of conduct for the prudent part of man-\\nkind to follow, while the imprudent are necessarily left\\nfree to disregard it, I have no hesitation in saying that it\\nis a most pernicious rule of conduct in its bearing upon\\nthe race. Its effect would be such as to cause the race of\\nthe prudent to fall, after a few centuries, into an almost\\nincredible inferiority of numbers to that of the impru-\\ndent, and it is therefore calculated to bring utter ruin\\nupon the breed of any country where the doctrine pre-\\nvailed. I protest against the nobler races being encour-\\naged to withdraw in this way from the struggle for\\nexistence.\\nNote 8y page 27, Civilization, with its social, moral,\\nand material complications, has introduced a disturbing\\nand conflicting element. It is not now, as Mr. Wallace\\ndepicts, that intellectual has been substituted for phys-\\nical superiority, but that artificial and conventional have\\ntaken the place of natural advantages as the ruling and\\ndeciding force. It is no longer the strongest, the health-\\niest, the most perfectly organized; it is not men of the\\nfinest physique y the largest brain, the most developed\\nintelligence, the best morale^ that are favored and suc-\\ncessful 4n the struggle for existence, that survive, that", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0199.jp2"}, "200": {"fulltext": "196 NOTES.\\nrise to the surface, that natural selection makes the\\nparents of future generations, the continuators of a\\npicked and perfected race. It is still the most favored,\\nno doubt, in some sense, who bear away the palm, but\\nthe indispensable favor is too often that of fortune, not\\nof nature. The various influences of our social system\\ncombine to traverse the righteous and salutary law which\\nGod ordained for the preservation of a worthy and im-\\nproving humanity; and the Varieties of man that en-\\ndure and multiply their likenesses, and mold the features\\nof the coming times, are not the soundest constitutions\\nthat can be found among us, nor the most amiable or\\nself-denying tempers, nor the most sagacious judgments,\\nnor even the most imperious and persistent wills, but\\noften the precise reverse, often those emasculated by\\nluxury and damaged by want, those rendered reckless\\nby squalid poverty, and those whose physical and mental\\nenergies have been sapped, and whose characters have\\nbeen grievously impaired, by long indulgence and fore-\\nstalled desires. W, R, Greg, in Enigmas of Life,\\npp. 123, 124.\\nIn a wild state, by the law of natural selection, only\\nor chiefly, the sounder and stronger specimens were\\nallowed to continue their species; with us, thousands\\nwith tainted constitutions, frames weakened by malady\\nor waste, brains bearing subtle and hereditary mischief\\nin their recesses, are suffered to transmit their terrible\\ninheritance of evil to other generations, and to spread it\\nthrough a whole community. Ibid., p. 12^.\\nA republic is conceivable in which paupers should be\\nforbidden to propagate; in which all candidates for the\\nproud and solemn privilege of continuing an untainted\\nand perfecting race should be subjected to a pass or a\\ncompetitive examination, and those only be suffered to", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0200.jp2"}, "201": {"fulltext": "N-OTES. 197\\ntransmit their names and families to future generations\\nwho had a pure, vigorous, and well-developed constitu-\\ntion to transmit; so that paternity should be the right\\nand function exclusively of the elite of the nation, and\\nhumanity be thus enabled to march on securely and\\nwithout drawback to its ultimate possibilities of prog-\\nress. Ibid.y p. 132,\\nIt can not be denied that the tendency, in communi-\\nties of advanced and complicated civilization, to multiply\\nfrom their lower rather than higher specimens, consti-\\ntutes one of the most formidable dangers with which that\\ncivilization is threatened; and, if not counterworked in\\ntime, must bring about eventually the physical, and along\\nwith that moral and intellectual deterioration of the race.\\nIbid,,p, 138.\\n**In every country in which a large standing army is\\nkept up, the finest young men are taken by conscription\\nor are enlisted. They are thus exposed to early death\\nduring war, are often tempted into vice, and are prevented\\nfrom marrying during the prime of life. On the other\\nhand, the shorter and feebler men, with poor constitutions,\\nare left at home, and consequently have a much better\\nchance of marrying and propagating their kind.*\\nCharles Darwin in Descent of Man and Selection in\\nRelation to Sex^ p, 132,\\nA most important obstacle in civilized countries to an\\nincrease in the number of men of a superior class has\\nbeen strongly insisted on by Mr. Greg and Mr. Galton,\\nnamely, the fact that the very poor and reckless, who\\nare often degraded by vice, almost invariably marry\\nearly, while the careful and frugal, who are generally\\notherwise virtuous, marry late in life so that they may be\\nable to support themselves and their children in comfort.\\nThose who marry early produce within a given period not", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0201.jp2"}, "202": {"fulltext": "1 98 NOTES.\\nonly a greater number of generations, but, as shown by\\nDr. Duncan, they produce many more children. The\\nchildren, moreover, that are born by mothers during the\\nprime of life are heavier and larger, and therefore more\\nvigorous, than those born at other periods. Thus the\\nreckless, degraded, and often vicious members of society\\ntend to increase at a quicker rate than the provident and\\ngenerally virtuous members. Ibid.^ pp. i^6^ 757.\\n**We must remember that progress is no invariable\\nrule. It is very difficult to say why one nation rises, be-\\ncomes more powerful, and spreads more widely than\\nanother. Or why the same nation progresses more\\nquickly at one time than at another. We can only say\\nthat it depends on an increase in the actual number of\\nthe population, on the number of men endowed with\\nhigh intellectual and moral qualities, as well as on their\\nstandard of excellence. Corporeal structure appears to\\nhave little influence, except as far as vigor of body leads\\nto vigor of mind. \u00e2\u0080\u0094Ibid. p i^g.\\nWho can positively say why the Spanish nation, so\\ndominant at one time, has been distanced in the race.\\nThe awakening of the nations of Europe from the Dark\\nAges is a still more perplexing problem. At that early\\nperiod, as Mr. Galton has remarked, almost all the men of\\na gentle nature, those given to meditation or culture of the\\nmind, had no refuge except in the bosom of a church\\nwhich demanded celibacy; and this could hardly fail to\\nhave a deteriorating influence on each successive genera-\\ntion. During this same period the Holy Inquisition\\nselected with extreme care the freest and boldest men in\\norder to burn or imprison them. In Spain alone some of\\nthe best men those who doubted and questioned, and\\nwithout doubting there can be no progress were elimi-\\nnated during three centuries at the rate of a thousand a\\nyear.** Ibid., p. 160.", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0202.jp2"}, "203": {"fulltext": "NOTES. 190\\nObscure as is the problem of the advance of civiliza-\\ntion, we can at least see that a nation which produced\\nduring a lengthened period the greatest number of highly\\nintellectual, energetic, brave, patriotic, and benevolent\\nmen, would generally prevail over less favored nations.\\nIbid, y p. 161.\\nNoteg^ page 27. See article by W. O. Atwater, in the\\nCentury Magazine, Vol. XXI, Nov., 1891, pp. 101-112.\\nNote 10, p. j2. A young woman without fortune,\\nwhen she has passed her twenty-fifth year, begins to fear,\\nand with reason, that she may lead a life of celibacy,\\nand with a heart capable of forming a strong attachment\\nfeels, as each year creeps on, her hopes of finding an ob-\\nject on which to rest her affections gradually diminishing,\\nand the imeasiness of her situation aggravated by the\\nsilly and unjust prejudices of the world. MalthuSy\\nloc. cit.y p, jg8.\\nAmong the lower animals and among many savage races\\nthe female has a great degree of freedom in choosing her\\nmate. Says Bdward Westermarck: **It should be noted\\nthat among savages it is, as a rule, the man only that\\nruns the risk of being obliged to lead a single life. Hence\\nit is obvious that to the best of his ability he must\\nendeavor to be taken into favor by making himself as\\nattractive as possible. In civilized Kurope, on the other\\nhand, the opposite occurs. Here it is the woman that has\\nthe greatest difficulty in getting married. The His-\\ntory of Human Marriage,^ p, i8s\\n**The transition from the animal to the human state\\nhas wrought a complete revolution in the sexual relations,\\nand transferred the selective power absolutely from the\\nfemale to the male sex. In no other department has\\nthere been so great a reversal of natural law.* Lester\\nF. Ward, in Dynamic Sociology, Vol, p. 61^,", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0203.jp2"}, "204": {"fulltext": "200 NOTES.\\nThe first step toward the subjugation of the female\\nsex was the conquest by the males of her prerogative of\\nselection. This was the surrender of her virtue in the\\nprimary sense of the word of her power over men,\\nover society, over her own interests. Ibid,, p, 648,\\nA considerable degree of freedom of choice seems to\\nhave been permitted to woman among the ancient Hin-\\ndus, as indicated by the following provisions of their\\nsacred law\\nThree years let a damsel wait, though she be mar-\\nriageable; but after that time let her choose for herself a\\nbridegroom of equal caste and rank. If being not given\\nin marriage, she herself seeks a husband, she incurs no\\nguilt, nor does he whom she weds. The Laws of\\nManu,^^ IX, go, p/; Sacred Books of the East, Vol,\\nXXV, A 343-\\nAfter indicating that woman s false position in refer-\\nence to marriage is due to her not having the privilege of\\ntaking the initiative, Dr. W. H. Byford says I am will-\\ning to incur the risk of ridicule by protesting that, in a\\nmatter in which her very heart is at stake, woman be\\nplaced upon an equal footing with man. As society is\\nnow constituted, and perhaps ever must be, woman is the\\nfamily almost; at least she is the soul and life of it, with\\nits quality and relations she is more interested and iden-\\ntified, and her welfare more influenced by it than man.\\nIf, therefore, there is any difference, she is entitled to the\\nexclusive privilege of choosing, not only from among\\nthose who prostrate themselves at her feet, but all the op-\\nposite sex. The Philosophy of Domestic Life, p, 57.\\nNote II, page jj. Henry D. Thoreau, in Familiar\\nlyetters, p. 251,\\nNote 12, page 37, Great lawgivers, the founders of\\nbeneficent religions, great philosophers, and discoverers", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0204.jp2"}, "205": {"fulltext": "NOTES, 20t\\nin science aid the progress of mankind in a far greater\\ndegree by their works than by leaving a numerous prog-\\neny. Darwin^ loc. cit., p. 1^4.\\n**He that hath wife and children hath given hostages\\nto fortune; for they are impediments to great enterprises,\\neither of virtue or mischief. Certainly the best works,\\nand of greatest merit for the public, have proceeded\\nfrom the unmarried or childless men, which both in\\naffection and means have married and endowed the\\npublic. Yet it were great reason that those that have\\nchildren should have greatest care of future time3, unto\\nwhich they know they must transmit their dearest\\npledges. Bacon s Essays VIII, Of Marriage and\\nSingle Life.^\\nNote 13, page j^.\u00e2\u0080\u0094 See Plato s Republic, Book V.\\nMr. Ivccky, speaking of the position of women among the\\nGreeks, says: Plato had argued that women were equal\\nto men; but the habits of the people were totally op-\\nposed to this theory. Marriage was regarded chiefly in a\\ncivic light, as a means of producing citizens, and in\\nSparta it was ordered that old or infirm husbands should\\ncede their wives to stronger men. ^History of Euro-\\npean Morals Vol. II, p. 30^. See also George Grote,\\nHistory of Greece, VoL pp. 488, 4.8g,\\nNote 14, pcLge 39. General Assembly of Ohio, 1898,\\nHouse Bill No. 281, by Mr. Parker.\\nNote 15, page 3g. Man scans with scrupulous care\\nthe character and pedigree of his horses, cattle, and dogs\\nbefore he matches them; but when he comes to his own\\nmarriage he rarely, or never, takes any such care. He\\nis impelled by nearly the same motives as the lower\\nanimals, when they are left to their own free choice,\\nthough he is in so far superior to them that he highly\\nvalues mental charms and virtues. On the other hand", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0205.jp2"}, "206": {"fulltext": "202 NOTES.\\nhe is strongly attracted by mere wealth or rank. Yet he\\nmight by selection do something not only for the bodily\\nconstitution and frame of his offspring, but for their\\nintellectual and moral qualities. Both sexes ought to\\nrefrain from marriage if they are in any marked degree\\ninferior in body or mind. Darwin^ loc. cit.yp, yo6.\\nNote i6^ pcige S5 Franklin H. Giddings, Principles\\nof Sociology, pp. 291, 292, 333, 352, 353, 414-416.\\nNote 17, page ^8, Essays, First Series, Friend-\\nship.\\nNote 18, page sg, No affection, save friendship, has\\nany eternity in it. Friendship, ought, therefore, always\\nto be cultivated in love itself. W. R, Alger, in The\\nFriendships of Women, p, 104,\\nIf a husband be truly the friend of his wife, as he\\nought to be, his love for her as a friend could be just as\\nstrong, just as tender, just as permanent and unswerving,\\nif she were not his wife, nor ever might be. It is such a\\nfriendship as this which gives a superadded joy in its\\nthen abounding opportunities and unhindered privilege\\nof freest expression to the rarest blessings attainable in\\nthe closest and holiest of all human companionships.\\nH. Clay Trumbull, in Friendship the Master Passion,^\\np. III.\\nA true friendship between a husband and a wife may\\nprecede the love which led to their marriage union, or,\\nagain, it may follow that love as the choicest of its inci-\\ndental results; but whether it comes earlier or later than\\nmere wedded love as such, there, as everywhere, the love\\nwhich is friendship transcends all other loves. Ibid,,\\np. 113.\\nMarried love is destined to increase, to develop. In\\nmany marriages this growth is checked, because the\\nmarried couple, too secure in possession, neglect to be", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0206.jp2"}, "207": {"fulltext": "ever acquiring fresh mutual love and esteem. Their\\naffection fades into indifference and merely external\\nhabit. This love may be also impeded and choked when\\nlove is too selfish, when those who love desire to belong\\nto each other in a fashion altogether too partial and\\nexclusive, when one can not bear that the other should\\nexist in any sense for other pursuits, or for other individ-\\nuals, also, but regards all free emotion, all interest be-\\nstowed upon other persons or other matters as a depriva-\\ntion and an injury. Martensen^ in Christian Ethics\\n{Social), p, 30.\\nNote ig, page 6g. Courtship, with its vivid percep-\\ntions and quickened emotions, is a great opportunity for\\nevolution; and to institute and lengthen reasonably a\\nperiod so rich in impression is one of its latest and high-\\nest efforts. To give love time, indeed, has been all\\nalong, and through a great variety of arrangements, the\\nchief means of establishing it on the earth. Unfortu-\\nnately, the lesson of nature here is being all too slowly\\nlearned even among nations with its open book before\\nthem. In some of the greatest of civilized countries, real\\nmutual knowledge between the youth of the sexes is\\nunattainable, marriages are made only by a higher kind\\nof purchase, and the supreme step in life is taken in the\\ndark. The people of America have proved that the\\nblending of the sweet currents of different family lives in\\nsocial intercourse, in recreation, and most original of\\nall in education, can take place freely and joyously\\nwithout any sacrifice of man s reverence for woman, or\\nwoman s reverence for herself, and, springing out of\\nthese naturally mingled lives, there must more and more\\ncome those sacred and happy homes which are the\\nsurest guarantees for the moral progress of a nation.\\nHenry Drummond, in The Ascent of Man, pp. 304, joj.", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0207.jp2"}, "208": {"fulltext": "^04 Motes,\\nNote 20y page 6g Aristotle suggested that men should\\nmarry at thirty-seven and women at eighteen, in order\\nthat their reproductive powers might decline together.\\nIt is possible that from the purely physiological stand-\\npoint a strong argument could be made for some such\\ndifference in the ages of a married couple. But the\\nrequirements of modern home life and the companion-\\nship of husband and wife necessitate the mating of per-\\nsons of nearly the same age. It is generally considered\\ndesirable that the wife should be somewhat younger than\\nthe husband, but some of the chief practical reasons for\\nthis belief would be effectually removed by the rule of\\ncontinence in marriage. Of course, the older people are\\nwhen they marry, the less important in general is a\\ndifference of a few years in their ages. See Aristotle s\\nPolitics, VII, i6, p.\\nNote 21 y page yo, Marriage is not a mysterious, won-\\nder-working institute of the Almighty, which can not be\\nstudied by the common mind, but a simple necessity laid\\nin man s social nature, which may be read and under-\\nstood by everyone who will investigate that nature.\\nIt should not be entered in blindness, but rather in the day-\\nlight of a perfect knowledge of its rules and regulations,\\nits provisions and conditions, its laws and privileges, so\\nthat no uncertainty shall attend its realization, no un-\\nhappy revealments shall follow a knowledge of its reality.\\nIts relations involve some of the most stem duties\\nand acts of self-denial that men are called upon to per-\\nform. G, S. Weaver, in Hopes and Helps for the\\nYoung, p, 2JI,\\nNote 22, page 71, In Charles Kingsley s Westward\\nHo there is a beautiful tale about the founding of the\\nBrotherhood of the Rose. Frank I^eigh, at a meeting\\nof Rose Salterne*s rival lovers, says, p. 180, Why should", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0208.jp2"}, "209": {"fulltext": "NOTES. 205\\nwe not make this common love to her whom I am unwor-\\nthy to name, the sacrament of a common love to each\\nother Why should we not follow the heroical examples\\nof those ancient knights, who, having but one grief, one\\ndesire, one goddess, held that one heart was enough to\\ncontain that grief, to nourish that desire, to worship that\\ndivinity; and so uniting themselves in friendship until\\nthey became but one soul in two bodies, lived only for\\neach other in living only for her, vowing as faithful wor-\\nshipers to abide by her decision, to find their own bliss\\nin hers, and whomsoever she esteemed most worthy of\\ntheir love, to esteem most worthy also\\nIn George Kbers s Uarda there is another pleasing\\nepisode in the first love scene between the heroine and\\nPrince Rameri. Uarda says\\nWhen I was strong, I often had to go late in the even-\\ning to fetch water from the landing-place where the great\\nwater-wheel stands. Thousands of drops fall from the\\ngreat earthenware pails as it turns, and in each you can\\nsee the reflection of a moon, yet there is only one in the\\nsky. Then I thought to myself, so it must be with the\\nlove in our hearts. We have but one heart, and yet we\\npour it out into other hearts without its losing in strength\\nor in warmth. I thought of my grandmother, of my\\nfather, of little Scheran, of the gods, and of Pentaur.\\nNow I should like to give you a part of it too.*\\nOnly a part? asked Rameri.\\nWell, the whole will be reflected in you, you know,\\nsaid Uarda, as the whole moon is reflected in each drop.*\\nIt shall cried the prince, clasping the trembling\\ngirl in his arms, and the two young souls were united in\\ntheir first kiss.** Pp, 362 y j6j.\\nNote 2s, page 75. It is not always easy, especially for\\na young person, to find out what are **pure and scientific", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0209.jp2"}, "210": {"fulltext": "2o6 NOTES.\\nsources of information regarding sex and its functions.\\nI know of no better literature for the young on this sub-\\nject than the excellent booklets by Dr. Mary Wood-Allen,\\nof Ann Arbor, Mich., entitled Almost a Man and\\nAlmost a Woman. For more extended treatises, the\\nbooks in the Self and Sex Series by Dr. Wood- Allen\\nand Dr. Sylvanus Stall are to be recommended. For na-\\nture studies in reproduction, Miss Margaret Warner Mor-\\nley s A Song of I^ife and L ife and Love, are excel-\\nlent and beautiful books. There are, of course, numberless\\ndoctor books containing more or less trustworthy in-\\nformation, but their tendency is to treat too much of\\npathological conditions, and all too often they are simply\\nadvertising media for men who wish to make money off\\nthe ignorance and misfortunes of the people. For ma-\\nture students Dr. H. Newell Martin s Human Body,\\neighth edition, contains an excellent chapter on Repro-\\nduction. Perhaps as simple a test as can be applied to\\nliterature on the subject of sexual functions by the indi-\\nvidual reader is this: if the author works upon the fears\\nof his readers, or devotes most of his space to a discussion\\nof sexual ailments, the book should be laid aside; on the\\nother hand, if he presents an ethical ideal, and treats of\\n\\\\he functions of sex from the standpoint of physiology\\nand biology, the book should receive further considera-\\ntion. It is not to be expected, however, that a person\\ncan get an adequate knowledge of sex simply by reading.\\nMen and women have different sex problems to solve,\\nand naturally do not take exactly the same point of view.\\nFor this reason it seems altogether necessary that, before\\nmarriage, a young man and a young woman should\\ndiscuss sex problems and compare their experiences.\\nDiscussion without knowledge would be fruitless. Knowl-\\nedge without discussion would furnish no safeguard\\nagainst mutual misunderstanding.", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0210.jp2"}, "211": {"fulltext": "NOTES. 207\\nNote 24, page 82, There is no reason for being arbi-\\ntrary in fixing the number of children suitable for a\\nfamily. In general, parents who are better fitted for\\nreproduction, and have more ample means for educating\\ntheir children, should have a larger number; while those\\nwho are less fit, and have more limited resources, should\\nhave fewer. It is not likely that a woman will be able to\\nmother more than half a dozen children without putting\\ntoo great limitations upon her own life for the good of\\nthe home. On the other hand, a single child in a family\\ndoes not even provide for a stationary population, and is\\nlikely to be spoiled by being made the too exclusive\\nobject of parental solicitude without having a chance to\\nlearn responsibility in association with brothers and\\nsisters.\\nNote 2j;yPage8j, The apparent object of the passion\\nbetween the sexes is the continuation of the species, and\\nthe formation of such an intimate union of views and\\ninterests between two persons as will best promote their\\nhappiness, and at the same time secure the proper degree\\nof attention to the helplessness of infancy and the educa-\\ntion of the rising generation; but if every man were to\\nobey at all times the impulses of nature in the gratifica-\\ntion of this passion without regard to consequences, the\\nprincipal part of these important objects would not be\\nattained, and even the continuation of the species might\\nbe defeated by a promiscuous intercourse. Malthus^\\nloc, cit.^pp. 441 y 442.\\n**The obvious design of sexual desire is the repro-\\nduction of the species. The pleasure attached to\\nthis function is simply to insure reproduction, and\\nnothing more. The gratification of this passion, or\\nindeed of any other, l)eyond its legitimate end, is an\\nundoubted violation of natural law, as may be determined", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0211.jp2"}, "212": {"fulltext": "2o8 NOTES,\\nby the light of nature, and by resulting moral and physical\\nevils/ R, Black, M, D., i?i The Laws of Health,\\nP^ 232*\\nThe Bible furnishes no foundation for the conclusion\\nthat sensual gratification is an aim of marriage. It is\\nremarkable that as yet no attempt has been made to\\napply the fundamental principles of Christianity to the\\nregulation of the sexual relation of marriage. Powerful\\nas these principles have been in forming and maintaining\\na chaste life among the unmarried, thus far the central\\ndoctrine of the Christian religion, that the lower nature\\nmust be made subservient to the higher, has not been\\nbrought to bear with any degree of force upon men and\\nwomen in the marriage relation. Every child has\\nthe right to be well-born. It is the duty of parents to\\nmake the prenatal conditions of their child the most\\nfavorable to the development of a strong body and mind.\\nTo allow a physical appetite to overthrow these condi-\\ntions is a sin. Furthermore, if this gratification tends to\\ndethrone the spiritual element and aim of marriage, it is\\nalso wrong. Sexual gratification should be inva-\\nriably subjected to the great aims of the well-being of\\nchildren and of the development of character. Charles\\nF, Thwing, in The Family, pp, 100, loi.\\nWhether the married life shall be a celibate life is to\\nbe determined by that mutual love and respect which are\\npresupposed in marriage. Purity is a duty as binding in\\nthe wedded as in the unwedded state. Reason and\\nnot passion, a regard for moral character and not a love\\nof pleasure, respect for the right of children unborn,\\nsuggest the principles which should guide the husband\\nand the wife in a relation in which injustice and impur-\\nity are as easy as they are common. Ibid,,p, 145.\\nSexual intercourse for procreation only was, to some", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0212.jp2"}, "213": {"fulltext": "NOTES. 209\\nextent, a practice among early Christians. The apolo-\\ngists, Justin Martyr about the year 150, Athenagoras\\nabout 180, and Minucius Felix about 200, all refer to the\\nchastity and sobriety which characterized the sect\\n(Christians), the celibacy practiced by some members,\\nand the single marriage of others, of which the sole\\nobject was the securing of offspring, and not the gratifica-\\ntion of the passions. \u00e2\u0080\u0094Lea^ loc. cit,^ p. jj.\\nIt is related of Zenobia, the celebrated queen of\\nPalmyra, that **she never admitted her husband^s em-\\nbraces but for the sake of posterity. If her hopes were\\nbaffled, in the ensuing month she reiterated the experi-\\nment.** Edward Gibbon, in The History of the De-\\ncline and Fall of the Roman Empire, Vol, I, p. 3S0,\\nnote.\\nNote 26, page 8^. \u00e2\u0080\u0094See Dr. Geo. H. Napheys, in The\\nPhysical Life of Woman,* pp. 184, et seq. Dr. Martin\\nsays: **The absence of the menstrual flow is normal dur-\\ning pregnancy and while suckling; and in some rare\\ncases it never occurs throughout life, even in healthy\\nwomen capable of bearing children.** ^^The Human\\nBody, eighth edition, p, 6^g.\\nNote 2^, page 86, There is every reason to believe that\\nmost married people have no program at first. And the\\nbest answer to many who object to continence is simply\\nto say, Very well, then, what course are you going to\\nadopt?**\\nNote28ypage88.\u00e2\u0080\u0094 Sa,mvLel H. Terry, in Controlling\\nSex in Generation,* quoted by F. W. Abbott, M. D., in\\nLimitation of the Family, pp. 21, 22.\\nNote 2g, page 8g.\u00e2\u0080\u0094 Dr. Wm. Acton, in The Functions\\nand Disorders of the Reproductive Organs,* p. 122.\\nNote 30, page go, Spencer, in Principles of Kthics,**\\nVol. I, p. 543. The general discussion referred to in the\\n14", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0213.jp2"}, "214": {"fulltext": "2IO NOTES.\\ntext will be found on pages 541-543 and 550-553. On\\npage 553, Mr. Spencer says, referring to sexual indul-\\ngence during pregnancy, and too frequent child-bearing:\\nHere, then, as in sundry preceding cases, evolutionary\\nethics utters an interdict which current ethics from what-\\never source derived, shows no signs of uttering.**\\nNote 31^ page go, Society looks with bitterest con-\\ntempt upon a temporary union whose only object is grati-\\nfication, and the price of which is money; but, for the\\nlife of me, I can hardly see any distinction between that\\nand the more permanent one where a very much larger\\nprice is paid. Rev, MinotJ, Savage^ in Man^ Woman^\\nand Child, p, 66,\\n**When the demands of civil law are complied with,\\nmen and women deem themselves, and are deemed by\\nothers, to have imposed all the restraint upon their\\ncarnal natures necessary to fill the ends of right and of\\nlaw. Consequently, when evils, in the form of disease,\\nmake their appearance in the organs devoted to the gen-\\nerative function, these diseases are not perceived to be\\nthe special result of any form of unlawful behavior, but\\nthey are usually supposed to be inflictions sent in some\\nway by an overruling power and for the spiritual well-\\nbeing of the victim.**\u00e2\u0080\u0094/. R, Black, M. loc. cit.,p. 2^2,\\nNote j2, page p/. There are certain women who seem\\nto be especially liable to conceive, no matter at what\\ntime during the inter-menstrual period the act takes\\nplace.* Z?r. Sydney Barrington Elliot, in Aedoeol-\\nogy, p.170.\\nSexual congress is most apt to be followed by preg-\\nnancy if it occur immediately after\u00c2\u00aba menstrual period,\\nThe menstrual process probably is a special prepa-\\nration of the womb for the reception of an embryo and\\nit^ nourishment. There is, however, evidence that ov4", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0214.jp2"}, "215": {"fulltext": "NOTES. 211\\nare occasionally discharged at other than the regular\\nmonthly periods of ovulation and may be fertilized and\\ncause a pregnancy. Dr, H. Newell Martin^ loc, cit,y\\np, 662,\\n**The Itme when impregnation is most apt to take\\nplace is probably during the eight or ten days immediately\\nfollowing the cessation of the menstrual discharge; and\\nsome consider the menstrual epoch and the few days pre-\\nceding it a period of susceptibility. Considering the\\nthree to five days of the flow, the four to seven preceding\\nit, and the eight or ten following it the fertile period, we\\nhave remaining a little more than a week of comparative\\ninsusceptibility, which has been termed the agenetic\\nperiod; but this rule has so many exceptions that we\\nmay safely say no period of absolute infertility exists.\\nDr. F. IV. Abbott, in Limitation of the Family, p, g.\\nNote jj, page g2. Women, who from infancy are\\ntrained to think of themselves as invalids, are ver)^ apt to\\nbecome such by the time they have passed through the\\nfeverish excitement attendant upon fashionable marriage,\\nand have entered upon their first pregnancy. They have\\nheard of longings, and so they begin to cultivate them as\\na part of their regular program. The usual result is to\\nfix the mind on something impossible to get, and then\\nworry lest the child should be marked by that impossible\\nthing. Dr.Sa^ah Hackett Stevenson in The Physi-\\nology of Woman y^^ p. g6.\\nNote 34, page 93,\u00e2\u0080\u0094^ During the whole period of gesta-\\ntion the woman is not merely supplying from her blood\\nnutriment for the foetus, but also through her lungs and\\nkidneys, getting rid of its wastes; the result is a strain on\\nher whole^system which, it is true, she is constructed to\\nbear and will carry well if in good health, but which is\\nseverely felt if she be feeble or suffering from disease.", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0215.jp2"}, "216": {"fulltext": "212 NOTES,\\nThe healthy married woman who endeavors to evade\\nmotherhood because she thinks she will thus preserve\\nher personal appearance, or because she dislikes the\\ntrouble of a family, deserves but little sympathy; she is\\ntrying to escape a duty voluntarily undertaken, and owed\\nto her husband, her country, and her race; but she\\nwhose strength is undermined, and whose life is made\\none long discomfort for the sexual gratification of her\\nhusband, deserves every consideration.\\nApart from pregnancy, moreover, a woman* s health\\nis often injured by frequent sexual intercourse. A phy-\\nsician who has unusual opportunities of knowing, states\\nthat he has reason to believe that not only is the act of\\nsexual congress at best, from a physical point of view, a\\nmere nuisance to the majority of [women belonging to\\nthe more luxurious classes of society after they attain to\\nthe age of twenty-two or twenty-three, but that a very\\nconsiderable proportion suffer acute pain from it such as,\\nif frequent, breaks down the general health/ Dr. H,\\nNewell Martin^ loc. cit.ypp. 66 j, 664.\\nIt seems that in practical social ethics some savage\\ntribes surpass most civilized men in certain respects.\\nWestermarck, in discussing the causes of polygamy, says:\\nThere are several reasons why a man may desire to\\npossess more than one wife. First, monogamy requires\\nfrom him periodical continence. He has to live apart\\nfrom his wife, not only for a certain time every month,\\nbut, among many peoples, during her pregnancy also.\\nAmong the Shawanese, for instance, as soon as a wife is\\nannounced to be in a state of pregnancy, the matrimonial\\nrights are suspended and continency preserved with a\\nreligious and mystical scrupulosity.* This suspension of\\nmatrimonial rights is usually continued till a considerable\\ntime after child-birth. Very commonly in a state of", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0216.jp2"}, "217": {"fulltext": "Savage and barbarous life, the husband must not cohabit\\nwith his wife until the child is weaned. The History\\nof Human Marriage, p. 483, See, also, for the laws of\\nthe fews, Leviticus 12, ig, 20; and for the ancient Zoro-\\nastrians, see The Zend Avesta, in Sacred Books of\\nthe East, Vol. pp. 172, 173, 185.\\nNote 3 s, page ()4. Speaking of passion as responsible\\nfor foeticide, Mrs. Isabella Beecher Hooker says: **That,\\nas a general rule, women are feebly endowed with this\\npassion, and that men are by nature and training (or\\nby lack of it, perhaps) overstocked, will not be denied.\\nGranting woman greater pleasure in mere sexual\\nindulgence than usually comes to her by largest allowance,\\nit is safe to say that, in nine cases out of ten, maternity,\\nwith its early pains, and later cares, greatly lessens her\\npower of enjoyment, and for the larger part of her married\\nlife she is either positively distressed by the apparently\\nnecessary ^demands of her husband upon her, and irre-\\nsponsive to them, or kept to a cheerful response by a\\nself-abnegation, and regard for his comfort, not to say\\nfear for his moral aberration, which is a positive drain\\nupon her health and strength. Womanhood, Its\\nSanctities and Fidelities, pp. 13, 14,\\nNote 36, page 96.\u00e2\u0080\u0094 Br. F. W. Abbott, of Taunton,\\nMass., in his pamphlet on the lyimitation of the\\nFamily, already referred to, discusses at considerable\\nlength the various devices used for the prevention of con-\\nception, and points out how all, or nearly all, of them\\nare harmful, or ineffective. In both city and country\\nslums many families are too large, and the overcrowding\\nof homes and the degradation of women into mere breeders\\nof unwelcome offspring are the sources of great evils. Yet\\nthe teaching of devices to prevent conception as a remedy\\nfor these evils would probably result in still worse con-", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0217.jp2"}, "218": {"fulltext": "^14 NOTES,\\nditions. For in proportion as any chosen device was\\nlikely to fulfill its purpose and was not disagreeable, it\\nwould remove the most dreaded penalty that nature has\\nput upon sexual sensuality. And who would say that\\nthe highly civilized upper-class society of ancient Rome\\nwas healthier than are the slums of Ivondon and New\\nYork Sensuality armed with riches and power is more\\ndangerous to society than the poverty and wretchedness\\nof the fourth estate.^\\nNote J7, page gj,\u00e2\u0080\u0094- h. fancied inability to support\\nchildren, or the inconvenience attending their care, the\\nprivations of the gay young man, who must go into\\nfashionable society, or the fashionable young lady, who\\nivill attend all the parties, fritter and flirt her time away\\nfor the enjoyment of the hour, bring both parties to a\\ndeliberate determination not to have children. They\\ncast about for expedients, consult some advertising char-\\nlatan for a sure preventive, or impudently bring their\\nloathsome propositions to their physician, trying to in-\\nvolve others in the nameless crime of destroying uncon-\\nceived offspring.\\nProbably all their worse than beastly efforts fail to\\nprevent results ordained by nature, and then, with frantic\\npersistence, they plan and execute the murder of their\\nown child. I^et every father and every mother know\\nthat life in the embryo constitutes it, in the light of\\nscience, and the sight of Him who gave it, a human\\nbeing, and to arrest the development of it is no less mur-\\nder than if it were born an hour. W. H, Byford^\\nM. D.y loc. cit,y p, 38,\\nThe whole subject of the morals of prevention of con-\\nception, and abortion, is treated with ungloved hands by\\nDr. H. S. Pomero3f, in The Ethics of Marriage.\\nNote 38 y page giy, There is a current impression that", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0218.jp2"}, "219": {"fulltext": "JStOTES, 215\\na pregnancy, once commenced, can be brought to a pre-\\nmature end, especially in its early stages, without any\\nserious risk to the woman. That belief is erroneous.\\nPremature delivery, early or late in pregnancy, is always\\nmore dangerous than natural labor at the proper term.\\n**Dr. Storer, an eminent gynecologist, states emphat-\\nically, from extended observation, that despite apparent\\nand isolated instances to the contrary\\nI. A larger proportion of women die during, or in con-\\nsequence of, an abortion, than during, or in consequence\\nof, child-bed at the full term of pregnancy.\\n2. A very much larger number of women become con-\\nfirmed invalids, perhaps for life and\\n3. The tendency to serious, and often fatal organic dis-\\nease, as cancer, is rendered very much greater at the so-\\ncalled turn of life,* by previous artificially induced\\npremature delivery Z r. H. Newell Martin^ loc, cit,,\\npp, 665, 666.\\nNote jp, page 9/. Wordsworth Donisthorpe, in I^aw\\nin a Free State, pp. 180, 190, says: In the eyes of\\nunprejudiced persons, unaccustomed to existing social\\narrangements, a marriage system would hardly be re-\\ngarded as immaculate which requires lifelong partner-\\nships to be entered into without experience, and, as it\\nwere, in the dark which, in case of disappointment,\\nenjoins upon the parties what Godwin denounced as a\\nlife of unchastity, the procreation of children in the\\nabsence of love which winks at the out and out sale of\\na girl s person into life-bondage ior hard cash which\\nunequalizes the male and female children s inheritance,\\non the ground that women are a marketable commodity,\\nand may expect to be kept by their husbands which\\nenforces the barbaric restitution of conjugal rights\\nwhich] sanctions the rape of a married woman which", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0219.jp2"}, "220": {"fulltext": "2i6 mTMS.\\nrefuses a woman divorce on the ground of her husband s\\nadultery which offers the youth of the country the\\nchoice between an irrevocable bond, and prostitution\\nwhich calls into being a standing army of public women\\nand which, in consequence, hands down from generation\\nto generation distempers which would die out in a decade\\nunder a system of orderly freedom. These words are\\napplied to conditions as they exist in England, but with\\nsome modifications would apply equally well to mar-\\nriage in this country. Mr. Donisthorpe advocates a free-\\ndom of marriage alliances of which I do not approve, but\\nwhich is a logical conclusion from the premise that sexual\\nintercourse for love, independent of its social function, is\\nvirtuous.\\nNote 40, page gS, Dr. Sydney Harrington Klliot, in\\n^doeology. This book is in many respects excellent.\\nIt was in reading the following passage during my fifth\\nyear in college, that I first looked squarely into the face\\nof the idea of continence in marriage:\\nWe now come to the consideration of the two remain-\\ning methods of controlling procreation chastity and the\\nprevention of conception. Chastity is the ideal proce-\\ndure. Most men are born with inordinate sexual\\npassion, and few are endowed with the power of control-\\nling it. Therefore we must have some means more prac-\\nticable than chastity without the criminality and danger\\nof abortion, and this we find in the prevention of concep-\\ntion. It is to be hoped that in future generations, virtue\\nand purity will be so innate that the first-mentioned state\\nwill be generally possible. However, as men are at pres-\\nent constituted, no matter what their condition, they will\\nhave intercourse, and the natural consequence of inter-\\ncourse is the birth of children. This occurrence in itself\\nwould be innocent enough were this the end of the", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0220.jp2"}, "221": {"fulltext": "matter but, on the contrary, this is only the beginning,\\nfor these children must be fed and educated, and must\\nfinally take on the responsibilities of manhood and\\nwomanhood whether they are fit for it or not. Fp.\\n148, 149,\\nNote 41 y page 106. The discussion in this paragraph of\\nthe text follows, in the main, the ideas expressed by\\nLester F. Ward, in Dynamic Sociology, Vol. I, pp.\\n^^1,etseq.\\nNote 42^ page 107, After puberty, occasional emis-\\nsions of semen, especially while asleep, are natural to the\\nhealthy male, and require no interference whatever.\\nDr. F, W, Abbott, in The Education of Youth upon\\nMatters Sexual, p. 24.\\nCertainly no man is entitled to the character of a\\ncontinent or chaste man who, by any unnatural means,\\ncauses the expulsion of semen. On the other hand, the\\noccasional occurrence of nocturnal emissions or wet\\ndreams is quite compatible with, and, indeed, is to be ex-\\npected as a consequence of, continence, whether tempo-\\nrary or permanent. It is in this way that nature relieves\\nherself. Dr. Wm. Acton, loc. cit., pp. 47, 48.\\nThis period of attaining sexual maturity, known as\\npuberty, takes place from the eleventh to the sixteenth\\nyear. As these changes are completed, spontane-\\nous nocturnal seminal emissions take place from time to\\ntime during sleep, being usually associated with voluptu-\\nous dreams. Many a young man is alarmed by these\\nhe has been kept in ignorance of the whole matter, is too\\nbashful to speak of it, and getting some quack advertise-\\nment thrust into his hand in the street, is alarmed to\\nlearn that his strength is being drained off, and that he is\\non the highroad to idiocy and impotence, imless he place\\nhimself in the hands of the advertiser. I^ads at this", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0221.jp2"}, "222": {"fulltext": "-m\\n2ig AroTES.\\nperiod of life should have been taught that such emis-\\nsions, when not too frequent, and not excited by any\\nvoluntary act of their own, are natural and healthy.\\nDr. H. Newell Martin, loc, cit., p. 66g,\\nNote 43, page 109, A11 experience tends to prove\\nthat if a man observes strict continence in thought, as\\nwell as deed, and is gifted with ordinary intelligence, he\\nis more likely to distinguish himself in liberal pursuits\\nthan those who live incontinently, whether in the way of\\nfornication or by committing marital excesses. Dr,\\nWm, Acton, loc. cit,, p, 74.\\nThe reader is referred to Dr. M. ly. Holbrook*s excel-\\nlent little book, on Physical, Intellectual, and Moral\\nAdvantages of Chastity, for a full discussion of the sub-\\nject. Chapter II, Does Chastity Injure the Health?\\nis especially valuable.\\nIn Swami VivekSnanda s lectures on **Raja Yoga,\\n**Yoga Philosophy, p. 180, occurs the following pas-\\nsage: By the establishment of continence energy is\\ngained. The chaste brain has tremendous energy,\\ngigantic will power without that there can be no mental\\nstrength. All men of gigantic brains are very continent,\\nand this is what gave them power. Therefore the Yoga\\nmust be continent.\\nThe most successful races, other things being equal,\\nare those which multiply the fastest. In the conflicts of\\nmankind numbers have ever been a great power. The\\nmost numerous group has always had an advantage over\\nthe less numerous, and the fastest breeding group has\\nalways tended to be the most numerous. In consequence,\\nhuman nature has descended into a comparatively uncon-\\ntentious civilization, with a desire far in excess of what is\\nneeded with a felt want, as political economists would\\nsay, altogether greater than the real want. A walk in", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0222.jp2"}, "223": {"fulltext": "NOTES. 219\\ntendon is all that is necessary to establish this. The\\ngreat sin of great cities is one vast evil consequent upon\\nit. And who is to reckon up how much these words\\nmean? How many spoiled lives, how many broken\\nhearts, how many wasted bodies, how many ruined\\nminds, how much misery pretending to be gay, how\\nmuch gayety feeling itself to be miserable, how much after\\nmental pain, how much eating and transmitted disease\\nAnd in the moral part of the world, how many minds are\\nracked by incessant anxiety, how many thoughtful\\nimaginations which might have left something to man-\\nkind are debased by mean cares, how much every succes-\\nsive generation sacrifices to the next, how little does any\\nof them make of itself in comparison with what might\\nbe And how many Irelands have there been in the\\nworld where men would have been contented and happy\\nif they had only been fewer how many more Irelands\\nwould there have been if the intrusive nimibers had not\\nbeen kept down by infanticide, vice, and misery. How\\npainful is the conclusion that it is dubious whether all the\\nmachines and inventions of mankind have yet lightened\\nthe day s labor of a human being. They have enabled\\nmore people to exist, but these people work just as hard\\nand are just as mean and miserable as the elder and the\\nfewer. Walter Bagehot^ in Physics and Politics,\\nNote 44, page 117. See Dr. George H. Napheys, lac.\\ncit.y p. 122.\\nNote 45, page 117. In his work on The Cell in Devel-\\nopment and Inheritance, Prof. E. B. Wilson states that\\nwhere several spermatozoa enter the ovum, or egg-cell,\\nthe latter breaks up and disintegrates. He further states,\\npage 148, that immatture eggs, before the formation of\\nthe polar bodies, have no power to form a vitelline mem-", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0223.jp2"}, "224": {"fulltext": "^^5 mms.\\nbrane, and the spermatozoa always enter them in coh^\\nsiderable numbers. These facts, although not gleaned\\nfrorn human reproduction in particular, would suggest a\\npossible cause for sterility in a woman who participates\\nfrequently in sexual intercourse.\\nNote 46, page 118. Dr. Wm. Acton, loc. cit.^ p. 118.\\nNote 47, page I2j.\u00e2\u0080\u0094 He who has an ideal of action and\\nprinciples of conduct is distinguished from him who has\\nnone by the position he accords in his life to the different\\nneeds of his being, and by the clairvoyance and the firm-\\nness with which he knows how to subordinate some to\\nothers. This is why I lay down the principle that the\\nprime necessity in love is to have an ideal, because this\\nideal helps us to govern ourselves. For him who appre-\\nciates his Mfe, his dignity, and that of others, to yield to\\nhis passions is, under certain conditions, to betray what\\nis most noble in him to gratify a simple desire. Conse-\\nquently, while recognizing that this desire is a legitimate\\none in itself, he prefers to sacrifice it and thus the first\\nhomage he renders to his nature and to himself is that\\nof chastity. Charles Wagner y in Youtky^^ p. 248,\\nWe are often told that the most thorough perception\\nof the dependence of wages upon population will not\\ninfluence the conduct of a laboring man, because it is not\\nthe children he himself can have that will produce any\\neffect in generally depressing the labor market. True:\\nand it is also true that one soldier s running away will not\\nlose the battle; accordingly it is not that consideration\\nwhich keeps each soldier in his rank: it is the disgrace\\nwhich naturally and inevitably attends our conduct by\\nany one individual, which if pursued by a majority, every-\\nbody can see would be fatal. Men are seldom found to\\nbrave the general opinion of their class, unless supported", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0224.jp2"}, "225": {"fulltext": "NOTES. 221\\neither by some principle higher than regard for opinion,\\nor by some strong body of opinion elsewhere.\\nIt must be borne in mind also, that the opinion here\\nin question, as soon as it attained any prevalence, would\\nhave powerful auxiliaries in the great majority of women.\\nIt is never by the choice of the wife that families are too\\nnumerous; on her devolves (along with all the physical\\nsuffering and at least a full share of the privations) the\\nwhole of the intolerable domestic drudgery resulting\\nfrom the excess. To be relieved from it would be hailed\\nas a blessing by multitudes of women who now never\\nventure to urge such a claim, but who would urge it, if\\nsupported by the moral feelings of the community.\\nAmong the barbarisms which law and morals have not\\nyet ceased to sanction, the most disgusting surely is, that\\nany human being should be permitted to consider himself\\nas having a right to the person of another. John\\nStuart Milly loc. cit.^ Book II, chapter /j, section 2,\\nNote 48, page 128. We believe that the greatest num-\\nber of examples of the most impassioned, absorbing, and\\nlasting affection between the sexes have occurred within\\nthe ties of marriage, and not outside those ties. More\\nthan other kindred relations, these rest on the nourishing\\nbasis of public law and social honor, as well as of personal\\nesteem and avowed identification of interests. Whatever\\nnecessitates secrecy, or compromises the fullness and\\nfrankness of self-respect, even if it give piquancy and\\nfire, takes away moral health, steady integrity; and inserts\\nan insidious element, either of devouring fever or of slow\\ndecay. Other things being equal, affection, wedded\\nunder every legal and moral sanction, reaches the highest\\nclimax, and is the most complete and enduring. Every\\nfailure implies some defect in the conditions. W. R,\\nAlger y loc, cit.y p, 106,", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0225.jp2"}, "226": {"fulltext": "222 NOTES,\\nNote 4g, page ij6.\\nA king must first subdue himself, and then\\nVanquish his enemies. How can a prince\\nWho can not rule himself enthrall his foes\\nTo curb the senses is to conquer self.\\nMahabahrattay XII, -?5pp, in ^Indian Wis-\\ndom by Sir Monier Monier- Williams^ p, 448.\\nYouth s glories are as transient as the shadow\\nOf an autumnal cloud and sensual joys,\\nThough pleasant at the moment, end in pain.\\nThe enemies which rise within the body,\\nHard to overcome thy evil passions\\nShould manfully be fought who conquers these\\nIs equal to the conqueror of worlds.\\nWho trusts the passions finds them base deceivers\\nActing like friends, they are his bitterest foes\\nCausing delight, they do him great unkindness\\nHard to be shaken off, they yet desert him.\\nKirdtarjumya, of Bhdraviy XI /j, 32,35;\\nibid,, pp. 463, 464.\\nWhat boots it to have wealth that is not given,\\nNor yet enjoyed What profits strength to one\\nWho ne er assails his foes Where is the use\\nOf sacred knowledge, if it does not lead\\nTo practice of religion What avails\\nA soul to him whose senses are not conquered\\nHitopadesUy^ Book 1^0; ibid,, p. 540,", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0226.jp2"}, "227": {"fulltext": "NOTES. 223\\nNote 50, page 136,\u00e2\u0080\u0094\\nI knew a common farmer, the father of five sons,\\nAnd in them the fathers of sons, and in them the fathers\\nof sons.\\nThis man was of wonderful vigor, calmness, beauty of\\nperson,\\nThe shape of his head, the pale yellow and white of his\\nhair and beard, the immeasurable meaning of his\\nblack eyes, the richness and breadth of his manner.\\nThese I used to go and visit him to see, he was wise also.\\nHe was six feet tall, he was over eighty years old, his\\nsons were massive, clean, bearded, tan-faced, hand-\\nsome.\\nThey and his daughters loved him, all who saw him\\nloved him.\\nThey did not love him by allowance, they loved him with\\npersonal love.\\nHe drank water only, the blood showed like scarlet\\nthrough the clear-brown skin of his face.\\nHe was a frequent gunner and fisher, he sailed his boat\\nhimself, he had a fine one presented to him by a\\nship-joiner, he had fowling-pieces presented to him\\nby men that loved him.\\nWhen he went with his five sons, and many grandsons\\nto hunt or fish, you would pick him out as the most\\nbeautiful and vigorous of the gang,\\nYou would wish long and long to be with him, you would\\nwish to sit by him in the boat that you and he might\\ntouch each other. Walt Whitman y in Leaves of\\nGrass, pp, 82, 83.\\nNote 51, page 138. In Plato s Republic, Socrates,\\nreferring to the suggestion that women should take part\\nin gymnastic exercises and warfare naked the same as\\njnen, says: But when experience showed that to let", "height": "4412", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0227.jp2"}, "228": {"fulltext": "224 NOTES.\\nall things be uncovered was far better than to cover\\nthem up, and the ludicrous effect to the outward eye\\nvanished before the better principle which reason asserted,\\nthen the man was perceived to be a fool who directs the\\nshafts of his ridicule at any other sight but that of folly\\nand vice, or seriously inclines to weigh the beautiful by\\nany other standard than that of the good. P, i/f4^\\nJoweWs Translation,\\nNote 52, page 140. An early result, partly of her sex,\\nand partly of her passive strain, is the founding through\\nthe instrumentality of the first savage Mother, of a new\\nand beautiful social state Domesticity. While Man,\\nrestless, eager, hungry, is a Wanderer on the earth.\\nWoman makes a Home. And though this Home\\nbe but a platform of sticks and leaves, such as the\\ngorilla builds on a tree, it becomes the first great school-\\nroom of the human race. For one day there appears in\\nthis roofless room that which is to teach the teachers of\\nthe world a little child. Henry Drummond^ loc, cit,y\\npp. 280y 281.\\n^ote S3^ p(^g^ 141 Olive Schreiner, in Dreams,*\\n^^Ivife s Gifts.\\nNote S4y pc^ge 144, I remember, only the other day,\\na good man looking with me upon a multitude of chil-\\ndren who were gathered before us in one of the most\\nmiserable regions of I/ondon, children eaten up with dis-\\nease, half -sized, half-fed, half-clothed, neglected by their\\nparents, without health, without home, without hope,\\nsaid to me The one thing really needful is to teach\\nthese little ones to succor one another, if only with a cup\\nof cold water but now, from one end of the country to\\nthe other, one hears nothing but the cry for knowledge,\\nknowledge, knowledge! And yet, surely, so long as\\nthese children are there in these festering masses, with-", "height": "4412", "width": "2636", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0228.jp2"}, "229": {"fulltext": "NOTES. 225\\nout health, without home, without hope, and so long as\\ntheir multitude is perpetually swelling, charged with\\nmisery, they must still be for themselves, charged with\\nmisery, they must still be for us, whether they help one\\nanother with a cup of cold water or no and the knowl-\\nedge how to prevent their accumulating is necessary,\\neven to give their moral life and growth a fair chance!\\nMay we not, therefore, say that neither the true\\nHebraism of this good man, willing to spend and be\\nspent for these sunken multitudes, nor what I may call\\nthe spurious Hebraism of our free-trading liberal friends,\\nmechanically worshiping their fetish of the produc-\\ntion of wealth, and of the increase of manufacturers and\\npopulation, and looking neither to the right nor left so\\nlong as this increase goes on, avails us much here and\\nthat here, again, what we want is Hellenism, the letting\\nour consciousness play freely and simply upon the facts\\nbefore us, and listening to what it tells us of the intel-\\nligible law of things as concerns them And surely what\\nit tells us is, that a man s children are not really sent, any\\nmore than the pictures upon his wall, or the horses in\\nhis stable, are sent; and that to bring people into the\\nworld, when one can not afford to keep them and one s\\nself decently and not too precariously, or to bring more\\nof them into the world than one can afford to keep thus\u00c2\u00bb\\nis, whatever the Times and Mr. Robert Buchanan may\\nsay, by no means an accomplishment of the divine wilU\\nor a fulfillment of Nature s simplest laws, but is just as\\nwrong, just as contrary to reason and the will of God,\\nas for a man to have horses, or carriages, or pictures, when\\nhe can not afford them, or to have more of them than he\\ncan afford and that, in the one case as in the other, the\\nlarger scale on which the violation of reason s law is\\npracticed, and the longer it is persisted in, the greater\\n15", "height": "4336", "width": "2503", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0229.jp2"}, "230": {"fulltext": "226 NOTES.\\nmust be the confusion and final trouble. Surely no lau-\\ndations of free trade, no meetings of bishops and clergy\\nin the Bast Bnd of I/ondon, no reading of papers and\\nreports, can tell us anything about our social condition\\nwhich it more concerns us to know than that and not\\nonly to know, but habitually to have the knowledge\\npresent, and to act upon it as one acts upon the knowl-\\nedge that water wets and fire burns And not only the\\nsunken populace of our great cities are concerned to\\nknow it, and the pauper twentieth of our population\\nwe Philistines of the middle class, too, are concerned to\\nknow it, and all who have to set themselves to make\\nprogress in perfection.\\nBut we all know it already someone will say it is\\nthe simplest law of prudence. But how little reality\\nmust there be in our knowledge of it how little can we\\nbe putting it in practice how little is it likely to pene-\\ntrate among the poor and struggling masses of our\\npopulation, and to better our condition, so long as an\\nunintelligent Hebraism of one sort keeps repeating as an\\nabsolute eternal word of God the psalm-verse which says\\nthat a man who has a great many children is happy or\\nan unintelligent Hebraism of another sort that is to say,\\na blind following of certain stock notions as infallible\\nkeeps assigning as an absolute proof of national pros-\\nperity the multiplying of manufactures and population\\nSurely, the one set of Hebraisers have to learn that their\\npsalm-verse was composed at the resettlement of Jeru-\\nsalem after the captivity, when the Jews of Jerusalem\\nwere a handful, an undermanned garrison, and every\\nchild was a blessing and that the word of God, or the\\nvoice of the divine order of things, declares the posses-\\nsion of a great many children to be a blessing only when\\nit really is so And the other set of Hebraisers, have", "height": "4336", "width": "2503", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0230.jp2"}, "231": {"fulltext": "NOTES. 227\\nthey not to learn that if they call their private acquaint-\\nances imprudent or unlucky, when, with no means of\\nsupport for them, or with precarious means, they have\\na large family of children, then they ought not to call\\nthe state well-managed and prosperous merely because\\nits manufactures and its citizens multiply, if the manu-\\nfactures, w^hich bring new citizens into existence just\\nas much as if they had actually begotten them, bring\\nmore of them into existence than they can maintain,\\nor are too precarious to go on maintaining those whom\\nfor a while they maintained? Matthew Arnold, in\\nCulture aiid Anarchy, pp. 188-191.\\nNote 55 y page 145. See Prof. John Fiske s The Des-\\ntiny of Man, and Henry Drummond, loc. cit., p.\\n281, et. seq.\\nNote 56, page 148. See Dr. Mary Wood-Allen s\\nTeaching Truth.\\nHuman life is neglected at its beginning. We\\nare better informed as to how to raise young domestic\\nanimals than to care for children. The instruction\\nthat is neglected by parents and teachers is always sup-\\nplied from outside sources. It is impossible that chil-\\ndren s curiosity should not some day or other be satisfied.\\nConfidence in parents and teachers is rudely shaken.\\nFor their ascendency is substituted that of a teacher\\nwithout authority. Charles Wagner, loc, cit., pp.\\n244. 245.\\nO, how many who ought to be pure and in them-\\nselves innocent and loving, are rendered sickly, peevish,\\nselfish, and insane, as a consequence of the vicious prac-\\ntices of their parents, and are, as a consequence, in turn\\nthe source of the greatest unhappiness to all around\\nthem, is known only to physicians. Dr. W. H. By-\\nford, loc. cit., p. J/.", "height": "4336", "width": "2503", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0231.jp2"}, "232": {"fulltext": "228 NOTES.\\nTill six years of age, definite sexual information may,\\nas a rule, profitably be withheld, and chief attention paid\\nthe avoidance of sexual error for it were folly to bur-\\nden tender minds with ideas that could only mystify, and\\nthe preservation of innocence will appreciably lessen\\nthe need of subsequent instruction.* Dr. F. IV. Abbott,\\nin The Education of Youth upon Matters Sexual,^\\np. 22.\\nChildren of eight, especially boys, should be warned\\nagainst masturbation, and shown its grosser evils for if,\\nas most physicians can testify, old enough to intention-\\nally contract the habit, they are old enough to be prop-\\nerly instructed concerning it. Most boys, according to\\nmany we have questioned, commence this practice about\\nten and a little anticipatory instruction would, no\\ndoubt, often prove the ounce of prevention. Ibid.,\\nNote 57, page 151. Mr. I^ecky, loc. cit., Vol. I, p.\\n108, quotes the following Chinese legend When there\\nwere but one man and one woman upon earth, the woman\\nrefused to sacrifice her virginity even with a view to peo-\\npling the globe, and the gods, honoring her purity,\\ngranted that she should conceive beneath the gaze of her\\nlover s eyes, and a virgin mother became the parent of\\nhumanity.\\nBuddha, the great Hindu teacher, whose life and\\nteachings rival in purity those of Jesus himself, was\\nbelieved by his followers to have had virgin motherhood.\\nThe immaculate conception of Jesus is an accepted\\ndoctrine of orthodox Christianity.\\nThese examples show that the world believes in the\\npurity of virginity and also of motherhood, but shrinks\\nfrom the intercourse of the sexes as impure. With con-\\ntinence in marriage, the intercourse of the sexes becomes", "height": "4336", "width": "2503", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0232.jp2"}, "233": {"fulltext": "NOTES. 229\\nas pui as virginity or motherhood, and is the fit instru-\\nment foi the creation of divine men.\\nNote sS, page 152. Because friendship is love with\\nthe element of selfishness eliminated, because it is love\\napart from any relation which involves possession or\\ncraving for possession, for that very reason friendship\\nhas found some of its choicest, its most refined, and its\\nmost unmistakable illustrations between two persons\\nof opposite sex. And just here the truth in its purity\\nhas had most difficulty of securing acceptance, in conse-\\nquence of the weakness, and folly, and wickedness, of\\nthe world. Yet everywhere and always at this point, the\\ntruth has had its recognition and its inspiring power in\\nthe hearts of the noblest and most nobly aspiring of the\\nchildren of men. H. Clay Trumbull^ loc. cit.,p. loj.\\nNote 59 y page 1^7 Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Es-\\nsays, first series, Friendship.\\nNote 60, page 165. Dr. Nathan Oppenheim, in The\\nDevelopment of the Child, p. 8.\\nIt is also a matter of serious doubt whether punish-\\nment should be inflicted of the slightest character,\\nbecause the child has not obeyed the command of father\\nor mother. He should be taught that the wrong nature\\nof the act is the cause of the punishment, and not that it\\nis administered for the purpose of maintaining parental\\nsupremacy. Dr. IV. H. By ford, loc, cit. p. 114.\\nBear constantly in mind that the aim of your disci-\\npline should be to produce a self-governing being, not\\nto produce a being to be governed by others. Were your\\nchildren fated to pass their lives as slaves, you could not\\ntoo much accustom them to slavery during their child-\\nhood but as they are by and by to be free men, with no\\none to control their daily conduct, you can not too much\\naccustom them to self-control while they are under your", "height": "4336", "width": "2503", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0233.jp2"}, "234": {"fulltext": "230 NOTES,\\neye. Herbert Spencer, in Education; Intellectual y\\nMoral, and Physical, published in the Humboldt Li-\\nbrary, April, 1880, p. joj.\\nNote 61, page i6g. See Dr. Albert Shaw s article on\\nThe School City in the American Monthly Review of\\nReviews for December, 1899. This article is descriptive\\nof a movement inaugurated by Mr. Wilson L. Gill, Presi-\\ndent of the Patriotic League, an organization whose pur-\\npose is to promote the teaching of civics in the public\\nschools of the United States. The school city is the\\norganization of the pupils in any particular school upon\\nthe model of the municipal government of the city or\\ntown in which they live. The purposes of the school\\ncity are two, nantely, to make every body of public\\nschool pupils self-governing in their school, and to pre-\\npare them by practical means for an active participation\\nin the duties of adult citizenship when they are grown\\nup.\\nNote 62, page lyi. Two men should be wiser than\\none, and two thousand than two nor do I know another\\nso gross fallacy in the records 6f human stupidity as that\\nexcuse for neglect of crime by greatness of cities. As if\\nthe first purpose of congregation were not to devise laws\\nand repress crimes As if bees and wasps could live\\nhonestly in flocks men, only in separate dens As if it\\nwere easy to help one another on the opposite sides of a\\nmountain, and impossible on the opposite sides of a\\nstreet! Joh?i Ruskin, in The Queen of the Air, 121.\\nNote 6s, page 176, Walt Whitman in Leaves of\\nGrass, pp. 152, 153, Song of the Broad-axe,\\nNote 64, page Rudyard Kipling, The White\\nMan s Burden, in McClure s Magazine, February, 1899.\\nNote 65, page 182.\u00e2\u0080\u0094], K. Bluntschli, in The Theory\\nof the State, p. 31.", "height": "4336", "width": "2503", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0234.jp2"}, "235": {"fulltext": "NOTES, 231\\nNote 66, page 184, J. S. Mackenzie, in **An Intro-\\nduction to Social Philosophy, pp. 376, 377.\\nIn a note on page 377, Mr. Mackenzie further remarks:\\nWe may say, at any rate, that the inspiration required\\nfor the spread of the social religion of the future (with-\\nout which it seems clear that there can be no true regen-\\neration of society), must be expected to come, not from\\nany mere philosophical theory, but from a living person-\\nality. Such personalities have not been entirely wanting\\nin recent times. We have had, for instance, the late\\nT. H. Green, Arnold Toynbee, and several others and\\nthe influence which such men have exerted has been\\na quite incalculable force. In comparison with such\\npowers as these, any theory, however excellent, is only\\nthe finite beside the infinite. At the basis of such per-\\nsonalities, however, there is nearly always, if not a philo-\\nsophic theory, at least a philosophic faith. Their lives,\\nindeed, might almost be said to be philosophy in the\\nconcrete they embody the ideals which philosophic\\ntheory seeks to analyze.", "height": "4336", "width": "2503", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0235.jp2"}, "236": {"fulltext": "LIST OF AUTHORS REFERRED\\nTO OR QUOTED.\\nRefbrkncks to the Text Are by Pages,\\nand to the notes by numbers-\\nF. W. Abbott, M. D., The Education of Youth upon\\nMatters Sexual, notes 42, 56. The lyimitation\\nof the Family, p. 88, notes 28, 32, 36.\\nWm. Acton, M. D., The Functions and Disorders of the\\nReproductive System, p. 88, notes 29, 42, 43, 46.\\nW. R. Alger, The Friendships of Women, notes i8;48.\\nSheldon Amos, *The Science of Politics, note 2.\\nAristotle, Politics, note 20.\\nMatthew Arnold, Culture and Anarchy, note 54.\\nW. O. Atwater, The Food Supply of the Future, in\\nCentury Magazine^ note 9.\\nFrancis Bacon, Essays, notQ 12.\\nWalter Bagehot, Physics and Politics, note 43.\\nBible, I^eviticus, note 34 Gospel of John, p. 131.\\nJ. R. Black, M. D., The I^aws of Health, notes 25, 31.\\nJ. K. Bluntschli, The Theory of the State, p. 182,\\nnote 65.\\nW. H. Byford, M. D., The Philosophy of Domestic\\nIvife, notes 10, 37, 56.\\nEdward Caird, The Critical Philosophy of Immanuel\\nKant, note 4.\\nCharles Darwin, Descent of Man and Selection in Rela-\\ntion to Sex, notes 8, 12, 15.\\n232", "height": "4327", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0236.jp2"}, "237": {"fulltext": "LIST OF AUTHORS REFERRED TO. 233\\nWordsworth Donisthorpe, Law in a Free State,\\nnote 39.\\nHenry Drummond, *The Ascent of Man/ p. 79, notes\\n19. 52, 55.\\nGeorge Bbers, Uarda, note 22.\\nSydney Harrington Elliot, .^doeology, p. 98, notes\\n32, 40.\\nRalph Waldo Emerson, Essays, pp. 60, 157, notes\\n17, 59-\\nProf. John Piske, The Destiny of Man, note 55.\\nB. Franklin, D. D., Marriage and Divorce, note 4.\\nFrancis Galton, Hereditary Genius, p. 27, note 7.\\nEdward Gibbon, The History of the Decline and Fall\\nof the Roman Empire, note 25.\\nFranklin H. Giddings, Principles of Sociology, p. 55,\\nnote 16.\\nW. R. Greg, Enigmas of Life, note 8.\\nGeorge Grote, History of Greece, note 13.\\nM. L. Holbrook, M. D., Physical, Intellectual, and\\nMoral Advantages of Chastity, note 43.\\nIsabella Beecher Hooker, Womanhood, Its Sanctities\\nand Fidelities, note 35.\\nRudyard Kipling, The White Man s Burden, in Mc-\\ndure 5 Magazine, p. 181, note 64.\\nCharles Kingsley, Westward Ho note 22.\\nHenry C. Lea, An Historical Sketch of Sacerdotal Celib-\\nacy in the Christian Church, notes i, 25.\\nW. E. H. Lecky, History of European Morals, notes\\nI, 3, 13, 57.\\nJames Russell Lowell, Poems, p. 47.\\nJ. S. Mackenzie, An Introduction to Social Philoso-\\nphy, p. 183, note 66.\\nRev. T. R. Malthus, An Essay on the Principle of\\nPopulation, p. 25, notes 6, 10.", "height": "4327", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0237.jp2"}, "238": {"fulltext": "234 OF AUTHORS REFERRED TO,\\nManu, Laws, note lo.\\nJohn Stuart Mill, Principles of Political Economy,\\nnotes 6, 47.\\nMartensen, Christian Ethics, note 18.\\nH. Newell Martin, M. D., The Human Body, notes\\n23, 26, 32, 34, 38, 42.\\nSir Monier Monier-Williams, Indian Wisdom, note 49.\\nMargaret Warner Morley, A Song of Wte, note 23,\\nLife and Love, note 23.\\nGeo. H, Napheys, M. D., The Physical Life of\\nWoman, notes 26, 44.\\nOhio General Assembly, 1898, note 14.\\nNathan Oppenheim, M. D., The Development of the\\nChild, p. 165, note 60.\\nPlato, The Republic, p. 13, notes 13, 51.\\nH. S. Pomeroy, M. D., Ethics of Marriage, note 37.\\nJohn Ruskin, The Queen of the Air, p. 159 note 62. G\\nSacred Books of the East, Laws of Manu, note 10;\\nThe Zend Avesta, note 34.\\nRev. Minot J. Savage, Man, Woman, ai:d Child,\\nnote 31.\\nOlive Schreiner, Dreams, p. 141, note 53.\\nAlbert Shaw, The School City, in American Monthly\\nReview of Reviews y note 61.\\nHerbert Spencer, Principles of Ethics, p. 89, notes 6,\\n30. Education; Intellectual, Moral, and Physical,\\nnote 60.\\nSylvanus Stall, D. D., Self and Sex Series, note 23.\\nSarah Hackett Stevenson, M. D., The Physiology of\\nWoman, note 33.\\nSamuel H. Terry, Controlling Sex in Generation, p.\\n88, note 28.\\nHenry D. Thoreau, Familiar Letters, p. 35, note ir.\\nRev. Charles F. Thwing, The Family, note 25,", "height": "4327", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0238.jp2"}, "239": {"fulltext": "yi-\\nLIST OF AUTHORS REFERRED TO. 235\\nH. Clay Trumball, Friendship, the Master Passion,\\nnotes 18, 58.\\nSw^mi Vivekananda, Raja Yoga, note 43.\\nCharles Wagner, Youth, notes 47, 56.\\nLester F. Ward, Dynamic Sociology, notes 10, 41.\\nG. S. Weaver, Hopes and Helps for the Young.\\nnote 21.\\nEdward Westermarck, The History of Human Mar-\\nriage, notes 10, 32.\\nWalt Whitman, Leaves of Grass, p. 175, notes 50, 63.\\nProf. E. B. Wilson, The Cell in Development and\\nInheritance, note 45.\\nMary Wood- Allen, M. D., Almost a Man, note 23;\\nAlmost a Woman, note 23; Teaching Truth,\\nnote 56 Self and Sex Series, note 23.\\nZend Avesta, note 34.", "height": "4327", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0239.jp2"}, "240": {"fulltext": "V", "height": "4327", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0240.jp2"}, "241": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4327", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0241.jp2"}, "242": {"fulltext": "vV J -J", "height": "4327", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0242.jp2"}, "243": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4327", "width": "2560", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0243.jp2"}, "244": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4680", "width": "2913", "jp2-path": "ethicalmarriaged00wilc_0244.jp2"}}