{"1": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4108", "width": "2432", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0001.jp2"}, "2": {"fulltext": "bv*\\nV *vVL\\n\u00c2\u00abo.\\nW\\nt\\n5-", "height": "4072", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0002.jp2"}, "3": {"fulltext": "o *o\\nO v o\u00c2\u00b0Jl -o.\\nJS ^5^Sv^.. O\\nV\\nv -4*\\n.0\\nt s^\\no\\n4 o", "height": "4015", "width": "2306", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0003.jp2"}, "4": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4087", "width": "2189", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0004.jp2"}, "5": {"fulltext": "THE\\nNEW COMIC ANNUAL,\\nFOR 1831,\\nYou are merry, so am I\\nII a ha then there s more sympathy.\\nShakspi art.\\nLONDON.\\nHURST, CHANCE, AND CO.\\nst. tail s church-yard.\\nC I 3", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0005.jp2"}, "6": {"fulltext": "r v Cv\\nLONDON\\nBRADBURY AND EVANS, PRINTERS,\\nFLEET STREET.", "height": "4132", "width": "2302", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0006.jp2"}, "7": {"fulltext": "XOT,\\nTO THE LORD HIGH CHANCELLOR:\\nHe is too elevated a Subject\\nXOT,\\nTO HIS GRACE OF CANTERBURY,\\nFor my subjects, altho arch, are neither serious nor divine\\nXOT,\\nTo the SENATOR, the SCHOLAR, or the SAGE\\nI write not of politics polemics or philosophy\\nXOR,\\nTo POETS, or PROSODIANS; for they exceed my measure:\\nBUT,\\nTo PROSERS and POETASTERS,\\nWho point a moral, or adorn a tale and,\\nTo PLAYERS and PUNSTERS,\\nWith whom, to act a part or crack a joke, arc\\nNUTS.\\nTO THE LOVERS OF GAIETY AND GLEE,\\nFrom the high-born Peer, to the low-born Peasant 3\\nand, especially\\nto the better half of mex\\nTHEIR MERRY WIVES;\\nTHIS\\ntfixit Volume 0f jfaXstafTs annual\\nis,\\nWITHOUT PERMISSIOX,\\nGRATUITOUSLY INSCRIBE]).", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0007.jp2"}, "8": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4132", "width": "2302", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0008.jp2"}, "9": {"fulltext": "Le petit chien du mendiant. The Beggar s Petition*.\\nYou must endeavour to write in such a manner as to convert melancholy\\ninto mirth, increase good humour, entertain the ignorant, create the admira-\\ntion of the learned, escape the contempt of gravity, and attract applause from\\npersons of ingenuity and taste.\\nDon Quixote.\\nYour Humble Petitioner\\nSheweth,\\nThat deeply impressed with that first law of\\nnature, take care of No, I he prays, that\\nthis his first Annual, may be well seconded in", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0009.jp2"}, "10": {"fulltext": "VI PREFACE.\\nsucceeding Numbers. In so novel a position before\\nthe public, your petitioner feels that he assumes\\none which he cannot long uphold, unless by your\\nencouragement upheld neither, in thus raising\\nhimself in cur-ious mood to a New Title, wherein\\nhe stands alone, does he expect, however upright\\nhis appeal, to support that title long, unless by\\nyou supported in his waggish tale and doggrel\\nverse.\\nTaking, therefore, the above stand, if not with\\ncap in hand, his mouth bespeaks the world s\\ncharity and the critic s mercy.\\nYour petitioner further sheweth, that\\nfull of faith in the one, and hope in the other, to\\nhis latest day, even on his last legs, shall his\\ngreat full tale appear in graceful lay unfolded.", "height": "4132", "width": "2302", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0010.jp2"}, "11": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0011.jp2"}, "12": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0012.jp2"}, "13": {"fulltext": "PREFACE. Vll\\nYour petitioner humbly conceives, that he\\ndoes not trust to a fragile reed, or rest upon a\\nfalse staff, in thus ushering into the world his\\nfirst Number by the merry title of\\nFALSTAPPS ANNUAL;\\nthe joyous harbinger of genial laughs, or glad\\ncontributor of social mirth ripe for all seasons\\nthe winter s hearth or summer s shade. But,\\nshould his bantling fade and fall with the\\nautumnal leaf, still may future evergreens be\\nhis never-fading laurels his broad merry face\\nlaughing sour crabs (who seek the fruit and\\nlook beyond the bark) into sweet countenance\u00e2\u0080\u0094\\nof his Annual, as worthier of the Wreath of\\nComus, than the Wrath of Critics.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0013.jp2"}, "14": {"fulltext": "VII 1\\nPREFACE.\\nIf, however, your petitioner shall appear to\\nhave set out with a frail bark/ he must,\\nnevertheless, trust to his present canvass, and\\nhope for a future better sail for, remember, my\\nbrother cynics, it is\\nONLY ONCE A YEAR!", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0014.jp2"}, "15": {"fulltext": "CONTENTS.\\nFalstaff s Festival, or the power of Mirth\\nThe Origin of the Bustle\\nChipping Norton, or the Modern Pygmalion\\nA General Election\\nLawyer Sharp\\nTheWoyager\\nY East Dumplings in a South Wester a true story\\nPhrenology\\nModern Fashionable Dancing\\nThe Foundation of Erazen Nose College\\nSuitor Johnny\\nTo a Lady celebrated for her skill in Painting\\nThe Village Spectre 3 a fearful story\\nEgypt s Lament\\nMy Grenadier\\nPage\\n1\\n11\\n15\\n19\\n22\\n27\\n30\\n34\\n38\\n40\\n45\\n47\\n48\\n53\\n57", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0015.jp2"}, "16": {"fulltext": "CONTENTS.\\nComposing and De-composing\\nFriend of my Soul {last edition)\\nOn Bathing\\nPuns on Punning, or Hints to a Punster\\nSoliloquy. By a Waterman\\nAn Essay on a Boot\\nA Great Sinner\\nThe Blue Stocking Belle\\nSonnet on a Lap Dog. By a Lady\\nA Tale of the Road\\nThe character of the Old English Yeoman\\nReasons for Drinking\\nWashing a Black Man White\\nGiving up the Ghost\\nHypochondriasis\\nThe Old Maid s complaint\\nThe Pot Boy a rough sketch\\nAnagrams, or words revolutionized\\nDefinite and Indefinite Articles\\nThe Lamentation of Old London Bridge\\nTragic Reminiscences", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0016.jp2"}, "17": {"fulltext": "CONTENTS.\\nXI\\nWar s Alarms. An authenticated tale\\nThe Suttee\\nTo a Chamber Candlestick. A fragment\\nOn Dog Days\\nSketches of Life in Philadelphia\\nA Morning Call\\nThe Love Correspondent\\nThe Rivals\\nThe Exquisite\\nThe Mercury\\nThe Justice Room\\nThe Hibernian\\nOld Acquaintances\\nThe Dancers\\nSally Watts. A pensive ditty\\nSome account of the Side Family\\nThe Contrast\\nA Letter from a Dustman to the Editor\\nThe Royal Exchange\\nBartholomew Fair\\nTrial, and Sentence of Sir John Falstaff\\nPage\\n131\\n136\\n141\\n143\\n147\\nib.\\n151\\n152\\n153\\n155\\n156\\n158\\n159\\n160\\n162\\n166\\n1/2\\n174\\n178\\n18/\\n189", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0017.jp2"}, "18": {"fulltext": "LIST OF PLATES.\\nPage.\\nCrabs vn\\nTwo of a Trade never agree 3\\nCordial Friends 9\\nSee what a pretty figure he cuts 15\\nA Sharp Contest for a Rotten Seat 19\\nA Solicitor 22\\nA Sharp and a Flat 24\\nA Retainer 26\\nArn t you well Sir Not wery 27\\nPhrenology .34\\nCur-tailing 40\\nSpare Rib .45\\nHarem Scare m 49\\nLaw, Physic, and Divinity 50\\nDesigner. Engraver.\\nW.Brown T. Mosses.\\nJ. Biggs.\\nT. Mosses.\\nR. West.\\nT. Mosses.\\nJ. N. Chapman.\\nT. Mosses.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0018.jp2"}, "19": {"fulltext": "LIST OF PLATES.\\nSeventy-four and a Tender\\nA Match too much Brimstone\\nThe Composer\\nOne Scraper at a door enough\\nThe Schoolmaster Abroad\\nA Cold Bath\\nA Hot Bath\\nBoots\\nCommitting Forgery\\nForlorn Hope\\nTravellers see strange things\\nRound of Beef\\nOne of the Society of Friends-\\nmet together\\nGiving up the Ghost\\nBrotherly Recognition\\nCome tip M veil stop a bit\\nThe National Guard\\nPoaching on forbidden Preserves\\nBreaking down the Bridge of\\nan Enemy\\nPage.\\nDesigner.\\nEngraver.\\n57\\nW. Browv.\\nT. Mosses.\\n59\\n61\\n63\\n65\\nR. West.\\n66\\nJ\\nX. Chapman\\n67\\n_\\n_\\n71\\n81\\n83\\n93\\n97\\n103\\n109\\n112\\n113\\n119\\nT. Mossed\\nJ. X. Chapman.\\nT. Mosses.\\nJ. X. Chapman\\nR.West.\\nT. Mossed\\nJ. N. Chapman.\\nT. Mosses.\\nJ. X. Chapman.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0019.jp2"}, "20": {"fulltext": "LIST OF PLATES.\\nPage. Designer.\\nA General Panic, and Run upon\\nthe Banks\\nThe Drama\\nA Detachment\\nThe Black Arts\\nHydrophobia\\nThe Odd Shelter\\nLife in Philadelphia 147\\nA Greenwich Pensioner\\nCribbage\u00e2\u0080\u0094 One for his Nob\\nA Storm\u00e2\u0080\u0094 Breakers a-head\\nThe Ball\\nThe Hop\\nDrawing from the Life\\nGeological Researches\\nWake Dearest, Wake\\nA Fair Day\\n125\\n127\\n131\\n136\\n143\\n146\\nto l6l\\n162\\n167\\n169\\n172\\n173\\n181\\n183\\n185\\n187\\nW. Brown.\\nEngraver.\\nR. West.\\nT. Mosses.\\nG. W. Bonner.\\nT. Mosses.\\nVarious.\\nT. Mosses.\\nT. Mosses.\\nJ. N. Chapman.\\nT. Mosses.\\nJ. N. Chapman.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0020.jp2"}, "21": {"fulltext": "HEAD AND TAIL PIECES, c.\\nPage.\\nSir John Falstaff Title\\nPetit Chien v\\nOnly Once a- Year viii\\nFalstaff s Arms 10\\nVenus and Cupid 14\\nBlack Eyed Susan .18\\nChairing the Member 21\\nA Solicitor .26\\nSqually 29\\nDestructiveness The Barrel Organ 37\\nHot-pressed 39\\nAn Orator of Bray s Nose 44\\nHere we meet too soon to part 46\\nThe Bottle Imp 52\\nA Cure for Sleight of Hand 6s\\nPatience on a Puncheon 70\\nA Scull-ing Match 73\\nExpansion of the Under- standing 7^\\nA Dumb Waiter 83\\nDesigner.\\nW. Brown.\\nEngraver.\\nT. Mosses.\\nR. West.\\nT. Mosses.\\nJ. Biggs.\\nR. WEbT.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0021.jp2"}, "22": {"fulltext": "HEAD AND TAIL PIECES, C.\\nA British Charge de Fare\\nA Tail of the Olden Time\\nFriends dropping in, c.\\nBeing Whitewashed\\nMrs. Kitely\\nA Happy Couple at the Altar\\nDecapitation\\nA Foul Drawer\\nA Suspension Bridge\\nA Backbiter\\nA Dis-charger\\nThe Black Dwarf\\nBare Polls\\nAn Unconnected Tale\\nA Man of War\\nThe Dustman\\nDog and Calf\\nThe Tail Piece\\n90\\n95\\n99\\n102\\n107\\n111\\n113\\n120\\n126\\n130\\n135\\n140\\n142\\n161\\n165\\n1/4\\n177\\n192\\nDesigner\\nW. Brown\\nEngraver.\\nJ. N. Chapman.\\nT. Mosses.\\nR. West.\\nT. Mosses.\\nR. West.\\nT. Mosses.\\nR. West.\\nT. Mosses.\\nJ. N. Chat. man.\\nT. Mosses.\\nT. Mosses.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0022.jp2"}, "23": {"fulltext": "THE\\n#\u00c2\u00a3eto Comic Annual\\nFALSTAFFS FESTIVAL\\nOR, THE POWER OF MIRTH.\\nAN ODE. IN HONOR OF COMI s.\\nTwas at the Festival by Hood begun,\\nThat Falstaff with his Fun,\\nFull oft in playful state,\\nA mirthful hero, sate\\nWith humour all his own.\\nHis cordial friends were plac d around,\\nTheir lips with plaudits and his praise resound\\n(So should desert in Wit be crown d\\nB", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0023.jp2"}, "24": {"fulltext": "Z FALSTAFF S FESTIVAL.\\nHood, lively Comic, by his side,\\nJohn with ecstatic joy espied,\\nIn prime of fun, and frolic s pride.\\nHappy, happy, happy pair\\nNone but the gay,\\nNone but the gay,\\nNone but the gay deserve their care.\\nCHORUS.\\nHappy, happy, happy pair\\nNone but the gay,\\nNone but the gay,\\nNone but the gay deserve their care.\\nSir Falstaff plac d on high\\nAmid the jolly crew;\\nLoud peals of merriment he drew,\\nThe joyous sounds ascend the sky,\\nAnd all with mirth imbue.\\nThat mirth began from John,\\nThey felt he was a Comic one,\\n(Such is the pow r of motley fun).\\nA Comic Annual now became the Knight\\nSublime on nothing could he write", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0024.jp2"}, "25": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0025.jp2"}, "26": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0026.jp2"}, "27": {"fulltext": "FALSTAFF S FESTIVAL. 3\\nWhen to St. Paul s Church-yard he stole,\\nAnd there pour d out his comic soul\\nThen from his waistcoat pocket took,\\nA full-length image of himself, the Falstaff of this\\nBook.\\nHurst, Chance Co. approve his lofty air\\nA Falstaff s Annual they shout, is here\\nA Falstaff s Annual again re-echoes there,\\nDelighted quite,\\nThe merry Knight,\\nIn laughing mood\\nAssumes the Hood,\\nAnd laughs with all his might.\\nDelighted quite,\\nThe merry Knight,\\nIn laughing mood\\nAssumes the Hood,\\nAnd laughs with all his might.\\nin.\\nQuick, returned Sir John, with his u Announcement he,\\nThat two men -of a trade can ne er agree\\nb2", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0027.jp2"}, "28": {"fulltext": "4 FALSTAFF S FESTIVAL.\\nThe adage proved, in sportive fun,\\nIn the case of Lackington\\nAnd co-book-seller, who.\\nEach on his first debut,\\nDid o er his shop-front write, bold as the sun,\\nCheapest in the world the one\\nThe other, Cheapest in this street\\nIn his Neighbours mode of vending\\nLies the front of his offending,\\nSoft the lecture,\\nSweet as nectar\\nSweet as kiss when lovers meet.\\nCHORUS.\\nIn his Neighbour s mode of vending,\\nLies the front of his offending,\\nSoft the lecture,\\nSweet as nectar\\nSweet as kiss when lovers meet.\\nIV.\\nSomething there was of comic vein,\\nIn these Announcements of the twain,\\nWhich nullified (or mollified) the adage old, and an\\nExample set of brother-Aooef,\\nOf humour great, and spirit good,", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0028.jp2"}, "29": {"fulltext": "FALSTAFF S FESTIVAL. I\\nFit for all trades. Again, tis said,\\nEv ry man to his own trade.\\nSir John employs the muse,\\nHis notion to infuse\\nThe simplest thing, like simplest thought,\\nBy force numerical\\n1. 2.-3. 4.-5. 6.-7.\\nSeven, eight, or more withal,\\nUnto perfection brought\\nMay be ergo, a pin or pun,\\nAlthough mechanical the one,\\nThe other, of a mental make,\\nEqual hands and minds may take.\\nv If ten pair, to a pin s construction, shall\\nBe used to give it point and head,\\nWhat handicraft un rival-led,\\nHowever skilful, could alone\\nGive force unto a Pun.\\nRevolving in his altered mind\\nThis simile a sorry one\\nJohn cries. The manus and the mens, a blind,\\nThough close, comparison", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0029.jp2"}, "30": {"fulltext": "FALSTAFF S FESTIVAL.\\nThe merry Falstaff laughed to see\\nA Pin and Pun in close degree\\nEach with a kindred sound and sense,\\nFor Point alone is their pretence.\\nStrongly, in Johnsonian measure,\\nPun appears a costly treasure.\\nMoney is our toil and trouble,\\nPun is but an empty bubble\\nNever ending, still beginning,\\nPunning still, and still annoying\\nIf a laugh be worth thy winning,\\nO think a Pun is worth employing\\nBut he, who s guilty of that trick,\\nSays Johnson, will a Pocket pick!\\nThe lexicographer, if living, would\\nCompare us to an old thief, Robin-Hood.\\nFalstaff, unable to restrain his zeal,\\nGaz d on his plan\\nHis inward man\\nFirst sigh d, then heav d, heav d and sigh d,\\nSigh d and heav d, from head to heel", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0030.jp2"}, "31": {"fulltext": "FALSTAFF S FESTIVAL.\\nAt length, of his Announcement vain and proud,\\nIts second page read sonorously loud.\\nCHORUS.\\nFalstaff, unable to restrain his zeal\\nGaz d on his plan\\nHis inward man\\nFirst sigh d, then heav d, sigh d and heav d,\\nSigh d and heav d, from head to heel\\nAt length, of his Announcement vain and proud,\\nIts second page read sonorously loud.\\nVI.\\nNow here, at least, too many Cooks\\nSpoil not the broth no more than many books\\nPall the taste. Ho\\\\\\\\ few soups savour,\\nTo palates fresh, of the same sort of flavour.\\nSir John s is ever new\\nHis taste as oft varies\\nAs Colman s vagaries,\\nOr the palette s varied hue.\\nBehold, behold, Sir Falstaff cries,\\nOther Comics arise\\nFor our brother last year,\\nHood, himself, did appear", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0031.jp2"}, "32": {"fulltext": "8 falstaff s festival.\\nSiam s Elephant, (thd* small his size)\\nWithout a rival one,\\nClear stage and favour none.\\nLike the Siam Youths, that by nature are twain,\\nLet us one remain\\nUnited in our plan,\\nUpon an open field\\nMutual fair play yield\\nHe to the Tilt of his fair enterprize,\\nTo our game toe, of glorious Chance,\\nOur equal fame and fortune to advance.\\nTwo faces disdains the Old Comic to wear\\nNeath one Hood so the New; as in Knighthood,\\nboth are\\nIn one golden fight\\nOf pun and fun the Knight\\nSeeks not from others their own /\u00c2\u00a3ve\u00c2\u00a3\u00c2\u00a3-hood to bar.\\nchorus.\\nTwo faces disdains the Old Comic to wear\\nNeath one Hood so the New; as in Knighthood,\\nboth are", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0032.jp2"}, "33": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0033.jp2"}, "34": {"fulltext": "CORDIAL FRIFXDS.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0034.jp2"}, "35": {"fulltext": "FALSTAFF S FESTIVAL.\\nIn one golden fight\\nOf pun and fun the Knight\\nSeeks not from others their own liveli-liood to bar.\\nVII.\\nTwas thus at once,\\nThe rnerry Falstaff did announce\\nThis Annual to his friends,\\nHis Cordial Friends and blessing blends\\nWith bumper glass,\\nTo ev ry honest lad, and each true-hearted lass.\\nSo Hodges with his cordials came\\nTo animate the mortal frame\\nThe sweet companions o er their sacred store\\nNarrow d its former larger bounds\\nBut added to their scandal sounds,\\nBy Hodges spirit mov d, and only one glass more. 1\\nLet the Old Comic keep the field,\\nThe New join in the u play\\nTo Hodges best let neither yield,\\nBut Knight-Hood rule the day.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0035.jp2"}, "36": {"fulltext": "10\\nFALSTAFF S FESTIVAL.\\nGRAND CHORUS.\\nSo Hodges with his cordials came\\nTo animate the mortal frame\\nThe sweet companions o er their sacred store\\nNarrow d its former larger bonnds\\nBut added to their scandal sounds,\\nBy Hodges spirit mov d, and only one glass more.\\nLet the Old Comic keep the field,\\nThe New join in the play\\nTo Hodges* best let neither yield,\\nBut Knight-Hood rule the day.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0036.jp2"}, "37": {"fulltext": "11\\nTHE ORIGIN OF THE BUSTLE.\\nSome years ago perhaps, fifteen or twenty,\\nJohn Bull (who loves on novelty to feast,\\nGod knows, our neighbours always give us plenty)\\nReceived an Importation from the East.\\nT admire the fair, John thought it was his duty,\\nAnd quickly fell to dreaming of love-knots,\\nHis visitor was (tho not fair) a beauty,\\nThe lovely Venus of the Hottentots.\\nBut here my tale requires an explanation,\\nWhich I will give as graceful as I can\\nBlush not, ye fair ones of this blushing nation.\\nOr if ye will, why, blush behind a fan.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0037.jp2"}, "38": {"fulltext": "12 THE ORIGIN OF THE BUSTLE.\\nThe line of beauty in this lovely dame,\\nIn admiration whereof John subscribed,\\nIs rather difficult for me to name,\\nAnd, therefore, by your leave must be described.\\nReader thou hast perchance heard some one tell,\\nThis beauty had a vast rotundity\\nTwas in that seat where Honour s said to dwell,\\nLike learning sometimes in profundity.\\nOh! who can tell what countless myriads ran\\nTo gaze upon this wonder of the East\\nThe Prince the Peer the Poet Clergyman\\nAnd Courtier rush d, their eager eyes to feast.\\nEclipsing all the beauties of the day,\\nThis sooty rival of fair womankind,\\nWhene er she wished her beauty to display,\\nPresented to the view her vast behind\\nThis could not last our lovely British fair,\\nBeheld with jealous eyes their mighty rival\\nWith her, by nature, they could not compare,\\nThe largest they could shew, was but a trifle.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0038.jp2"}, "39": {"fulltext": "THE ORIGIN OF THE BUSTLE. 13\\nIt was agreed, nem. con., that such a sight\\nIn Britain s Isle had ne er been seen before,\\nThe ladies all were in a piteous plight,\\nTheir slender shapes they voted quite a bore.\\nTis said with truth that when Dame Nature fails,\\nWe have recourse to her half-sister Art\\nAnd oftentimes her wondrous skill avails,\\nTo lull the sorrows of an aching heart.\\nA convocation of the fair was called,\\nTo take their case into consideration,\\nDiscuss the cause by which they were enthralled,\\nAnd to obtain redress for all the nation.\\nWhen after much debating, pro. and con.,\\nA celebrated milliner from Paris,\\nCried out Mafoi a plan I ve hit upon,\\nWhich cle resemblance of our rival carries.\\nWho can describe the scene of uproar there,\\nEcstatic joy beyond all comprehension\\nCaps, hats, and bonnets flew up in the air,\\nWhen Madame B. described her sly invention.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0039.jp2"}, "40": {"fulltext": "14\\nTHE ORIGIN OF THE BUSTLE.\\nOh not one minute longer would they stay,\\nBut all was hurry, Bustle, and perplexity\\nWith buckram, whalebone, wool, and starch that day,\\nEach lady made herself a vast convexity.\\nNo longer needed they, in secret, plot,\\nThe dingy queen of Hearts they now could jostle,\\nThe sable Venus was forthwith forgot,\\nAnd their Appendage henceforth call d a Bustle\\nVenus and Cupid.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0040.jp2"}, "41": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0041.jp2"}, "42": {"fulltext": "W--^liP^fc^:. I\\nSEE WHAT A PRETTY FIGURE HE CUTS", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0042.jp2"}, "43": {"fulltext": "15\\nCHIPPING-NORTON;\\nOR,\\nTHE MODERN PYGMALION.\\nJack Norton was a mason bred.\\nAnd might have gained a fortune,\\nBut was by chipping heads misled,\\nAnd nick-named Ch ipp /^-Norton\\nTis even said, that when a boy,\\n(How fame our actions garbles),\\nHe scorned each other childish toy,\\nAnd loved to play with marbles.\\nNo longer pavements he laid down,\\nSinks made him melancholy\\nHe meant in London s learned town,\\nTo pave his way\u00e2\u0080\u0094 with folly.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0043.jp2"}, "44": {"fulltext": "16 CHIPPING-jNORTON.\\nCanova s works before his eyes,\\nHe kick d his beer-ca?i over\\nResolved like him in fame to rise\\nBy skill, or by manoeuvre.\\nTo town he came to cut his way,\\nBy cutting teeth and ears\\nAnd lips with not a word to say,\\nAnd eyes that shed no tears.\\nHis hand upon a head he tried,\\nA block of marble spoiling\\nA block-head made, and shouting, cried,\\nSuccess rewards my toiling.\\nBecome more practised in the art,\\nHe ll yield the palm to no man\\nAt first he chiselled but a part,\\nBut now has carved a woman.\\nPygmalion like, he fell in love\\nWith his own statuary\\nBut tried in vain her breast to move,\\nShe was a statue wary.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0044.jp2"}, "45": {"fulltext": "CHIPPIXG-NORTON. 17\\nAnd after weeks of weeping, he\\nHis sorrows thus exprest\\nHow cold and hard the heart must be,\\nEnshrined in such a breast\\nWith classic skill that ear I turned,\\nBut now that I would woo thee,\\nMy only fond request is spurned,\\nYou turn a deaf ear to me.\\nThe Icicle on Dian s throne,\\nBy summer suns will vary,\\nUnlike to thee, thou lifeless one,\\nCold, petrifying fairy\\nIn lovely woman are combined,\\nTruth, honour, grace and duty,\\nDevoid of soul of eye and mind,\\nSay, what are youth and beauty\\nOh! would that bosom heave one sigh,\\nTwould all my cares repay\\nBut since that blessing you deny,\\nI ll heave my sighs away,\\nc", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0045.jp2"}, "46": {"fulltext": "18\\nCHIPPING-NORTON.\\nOh cold as ice, thou freezing shrine,\\nWith all the artist s vigour,\\nWithout dear woman s eye divine,\\nHe cuts a sorry figure.\\nBLACK EY D SUSAN.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0046.jp2"}, "47": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0047.jp2"}, "48": {"fulltext": "A SMART CONTEST FOR A ROTTEN SEAT.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0048.jp2"}, "49": {"fulltext": "19\\nA GENERAL ELECTION\\nIs a sort of civil or intestine war in miniature parties\\nand spirits run high, while cash runs low. It is a\\ntime when John Bull s constitution unfolds itself; his\\nconstitutional love of homely cheer is gratified, and,\\nbest of all, not at his own expence.\\nInstead of the genuine spirit of elections, independent\\nvoters for the most part run about from one candidate\\nto another, votaries to spirits of their own selection.\\nPolls are opened and closed with as much tang froid,\\nand as little bloodshed, as though the heads of corporate\\nbodies had gone the round of the Hospital at Guy s\\nand the independent Electors hit off their parts to\\nadmiration.\\nA ribbon, be it red, green, or blue, will, in a sharp\\ncontest, lead to more ruby noses and particolored hides,\\nthan a brisk Irish row. An.election may well match with\\nc2", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0049.jp2"}, "50": {"fulltext": "20 A GENERAL ELECTION.\\na hospital, for corruption many a sprig of nobility is\\nforced virtually to turn pawnbroker, and circulate the\\ngolden ball to avoid being black-balled while the third\\nman, as he is termed, not unfrequently, like the little\\ntailor in the old song, cabbages the broad cloth of his\\nmore honest than fortunate rivals.\\nWere the true spirit, or rather substance, of John Bull\\nto be represented in St. Stephen s, that temple of pure\\nand philanthropic wisdom would be found too small to\\ncontain the solid representation of the people, although\\nconfined to a small portion only of each constituent, so\\nfilled out are electors at this season of food and feasting.\\nNo wonder, therefore, that representatives are required,\\nwhen in Parliament, to vote for a system of reduction,\\nor rather a reduction of the system\\nIt has been suggested to future candidates for St.\\nStephen s, to prepare stuffed puppets, selected from the\\ndandies of St. James s, to perform the office of bowers and\\nscrapers, and also as better fitted to stand against the\\ngenial showers so copiously poured of late by choice\\nelectors on their chosen men for it is one of the high\\nprivileges of a free Briton, to load with abuse the man\\nupon whose bounty he has just before fed and feasted.\\nA contested election too often produces virtually to some", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0050.jp2"}, "51": {"fulltext": "A GENERAL ELECTION.\\n21\\ncandidates in part, and to others in to-to, the pain and\\npenalty of gout, they having to undergo the operation of\\nChairing the Member; while with the unfortunate\\ncheer-less candidate, it operates like a Tract of the\\nSociety for the diffusion of Useful Knowledge.\\nChairing the Member,", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0051.jp2"}, "52": {"fulltext": "22\\nLAWYER SHARP.\\nHow many feel the Law s delay,\\nAnd curse the fatal hour,\\nThat gave them up to law a prey,\\nTheir substance to devour.\\nHow many fated clients pray\\nThey could delay the law\\nBut its proceedings who can stay*\\nOr from its toils withdraw\\nFat fees the Lawyers hope to net,\\nFrom those their wiles ensnare,\\nNor they the toils of Law regret,\\nWhile charge repays their care.\\nThey with their special-pleading tact,\\nWill lengthen out a brief\\nIt costs no labour to abstract,\\nFor costs are their relief.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0052.jp2"}, "53": {"fulltext": "A SOLICITOR.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0053.jp2"}, "54": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0054.jp2"}, "55": {"fulltext": "LAWYER SHARP. 23\\nWell suited are the terms of Law,\\nTo sue in Law or Love\\nIn each to rectify a flaw,\\nWe move the Courts above.\\nIf Chloe an appearance enter,\\nHer heart by Damon sued,\\nShould he no Declaration venture,\\nIn vain that heart is woo d.\\nBut if put in, and Chloe s heart\\nTo answer it, shall pause\\nFond Damon, with love s tricky art,\\nGets Judgment in the cause.\\nThen Chloe counsels Lawyer Sharp,\\n(Whose pay is meal or malt,)\\nIf wilily he could not warp\\nThis Judgment by default.\\nShe swears that Damon thus by force\\nOf arms her person took,\\nAnd prays an order to disperse\\nSaid Judgment from the book.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0055.jp2"}, "56": {"fulltext": "24 LAWYER SHARP.\\nAn armed force is in her view,\\nUnnatural coercion\\nIn Law, or Love, it seemed undue\\nAttachment of the person.\\nSharp-set was Damon by this course\\nOf Law, like one astounded\\nSoon, (many a six-and-eight-pence worse,)\\nHis person finds impounded.\\nSharp was no shark, nor yet a flat,\\nBut others he made sharper\\nThe flats, he would press flatter that\\nWas nat ral, in law s warfare.\\nTis said the laws will take their course,\\nUntil they make you fee sick,\\nAnd feed upon the bowels worse\\nThan e en a course of physic.\\nThus, Lawyer Sharp look d to his fees,\\nIn hopes to save his gammon,\\nNor had recourse to common pleas,\\nOr common law with Damon.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0056.jp2"}, "57": {"fulltext": "A SHARP AND A FLAT", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0057.jp2"}, "58": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0058.jp2"}, "59": {"fulltext": "LAWYER SHARP. 25\\nOld Sharp did not a bill run up\\nBut flat upon the table\\nSpread out his fare (young Damon s cup\\nOf gall) Pay what you re able,\\nSays he, to Damon, compromise\\nCome promise all you can\\nCorn-pound for if now penny-wise,\\nYou ll be pound-foolish, man.\\nPoor Damon, into either pocket\\nNow slid his timid paw,\\nWith eyes protruding from each socket,\\nTo see this bill for Law.\\nFor he was used to bill and coo\\nIn Cupid s court of Love\\nBut Damon was unused to woo, (woe)\\nIn the Law-courts above.\\nSharp saw the elevated brow\\nOf Damon, with surprise,\\nAnd guessed his pocket being low\\nMight cause that brow to rise.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0059.jp2"}, "60": {"fulltext": "26 LAWYER SHARP.\\nWith act alert, and art expert,\\nOut Damon turn d his pockets\\nWith motion quick, did Sharp invert\\nHis eye-balls in their sockets.\\nAnd loud exclaim d, fee loss of fee\\nShall Damon me outwit\\nOh guide me, blest Phi-lo-so-phy,\\nThe biter shall be bit\\nSo Sharp at once to fix his claim,\\nAnd client run aground,\\nTo brief determination came,\\nReduced both, to a pound\\nA SOLICITOR,", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0060.jp2"}, "61": {"fulltext": "A RETAINER.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0061.jp2"}, "62": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0062.jp2"}, "63": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0063.jp2"}, "64": {"fulltext": "ajis t you well, sir? not\\nWERV.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0064.jp2"}, "65": {"fulltext": "27\\nTHE WOYAGER.\\nVell, arter all, there is nothing like a sea woyage. I\\nalvays says to my vife, vomen are not fit for sea, because\\nThy they are so wery nerwous. Vhat an inwention is\\nsteam ve are no sooner out of sight of Vappin than ve\\ncomes in sight of Voolich. An t it astonishin said a\\nsimple untravelled east-ender to the commander of a\\nThames steamer bound for Ramsgate. It s a wery dan-\\ngerous woyage to the Isle of Thanet all along that ere\\ncoast I m not frightened, but if there be any danger,\\nvould you be kind enough to let me know. Oh there\\nis no danger but a great deal of fear answered the bluff\\nCaptain. Vell, that s wery terrific now how deep is it\\nhere asked the curious one. The Captain thinking to\\namuse himself with the cockney, answered ten fathom\\nand a half and three quarters. La vhat a depth,\\nand how many miles are ve from London Thirteen", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0065.jp2"}, "66": {"fulltext": "28 THE WOYAGER.\\nand a half. Oh how wery particler vhat is the\\nvheel for To steer by. Then I suppose ve goes\\nround and round in the vater. Veil, I von t go down\\nstairs, for a sort of an all-owerishness comes ower me vhen\\nI do, and vhile I stays on deck I alvays gits a happitite.\\nBut if that ere vheel should bring about a vhirlvind,\\nthen vhere should ve be At the bottom, to be sure,\\nanswered the Captain, who finding he was doomed to\\nthe horrors of the Inquisition, had recourse to a ruse to\\nget rid of the offender, and began to prepare himself for\\nhis next question. Just off the North Foreland the cit\\nwas making another sally with some other silly remark,\\nbut with rather a sickly cast of countenance. Ar n t\\nyou well, Sir said the Captain. Not wery, was the\\nreply. Well, I don t like to alarm you, but as you\\nwished to be apprised of any danger, don t you perceive\\nthe chimney leans a little, and don t you hear a sort of\\ncracking noise in the boilers Veil, Sir replied\\nhe, terrified. u Then you go down below immediately,\\nbe silent as you value the safety of the vessel, any\\nnoise will interfere with my commands in the mean\\ntime there is some pease soup and a mutton chop, and\\nwith that you can amuse yourself until we are out of\\ndanger.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0066.jp2"}, "67": {"fulltext": "THE WOYAGER. 29\\nThe frightened gentleman now descended on the very\\nfirst glimpse of the above mentioned viands, he pros-\\ntrated himself upon the cabin floor, a prey to the cre-\\ndulity of his disposition, and a victim to that superlative\\nof all horrors, sea-indisposition; the commander of the\\nvessel was benefitted by the change, and the poor cit\\nalarmed by the idea of its becoming", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0067.jp2"}, "68": {"fulltext": "30\\nY\u00e2\u0080\u0094 EAST DUMPLINGS IN A SOUTH-WESTER.\\nA TRUE STORY.\\nAn t plase your Honor, Barney said,\\nAnd twitched his red cap from his head,\\nMy messmates wish to have a treat\\nOf some yeast dumplings with their meat,\\nAnd beg you ll let the steward pay\\nFor dough instead of flour to day.\\nThe Captain said, I can t object\\nTo your request, and recollect,\\nTo let me have one for my dinner.\\nQuoth Barney, Sure as I m a sinner,\\nYour honor ll have the very best\\nOf dumplings that was ever drest.\\nThe Captain smiled, the cook departed,\\nAnd to his messmates joy imparted.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0068.jp2"}, "69": {"fulltext": "y EA st DUMPLINGS IN A SOUTH-WESTER. 31\\nThe dough procured he set to work,\\nAs cheerfully as does a Turk\\nAround some neck arrange the bowstring,\\nAnd fancy he but ties a shoe-string.\\nHe weighed out for each man a pound,\\nAnd rolled them up, small, neat, and round,\\nThe copper ready water hot\\nHe sent the dumplings all to pot\\nA roaring fire with little trouble,\\nSoon made the water boil and bubble,\\nLike Shakspeare s cauldron in Macbeth,\\nWhen witches danced a Dance of Death.\\nExulting now old Barney stands,\\nWatches the steam and rubs his hands\\nAnd all things going on quite right,\\nTook out his well burnt pipe to light\\nThen went to take a whiff or two\\nOn deck, as all good sailors do\\nBut scarcely had he blown a cloud,\\nBefore he heard a clamour loud\\nA dozen tongues cried, Barney Quick\\nThe Devil Dumplings and Old Nick\\nAmazed confused he rushed below\\nTo learn what had befall n, when lo", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0069.jp2"}, "70": {"fulltext": "32 Y EAST DUMPLINGS IN A SOUTH-WESTER.\\nSlap reeking hot, ere he could speak\\nA dumpling hit him on the cheek\\nAnd looking round, North, South, and West,\\nLay his y-east darlings half undrest,\\nDisdainful of a vapour bath.\\nBarney enraged, yet quelled his wrath,\\nAnd snatching up a hugeous fork,\\nInstanter set himself to work,\\nHis dainty dumplings to replace,\\nTo hide his shame and scape disgrace\\nBut quickly gathered from the ground,\\nAmazed the copper full he found.\\na Od blood an ouns! why how is this?\\nI only filled the pot, I wis,\\nAnd twice as many now appear:\\nSome must have brought forth young, tis clear.\\nAscribing to multiplication\\nTh effects of simple fermentation.\\nTo end my tale tho not quite spoiled.\\nThey were, in due time, all quite boiled.\\nQuick from the lot, the anxious cook\\nThe finest, plumpest dumpling took,\\nAnd to the after cabin brought it,\\nGood Lord a giant you d have thought it,", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0070.jp2"}, "71": {"fulltext": "Y EAST DUMPLINGS IN A SOUTH WESTER. 33\\nThe cover raised, the Captain eyed\\nThe monstrous smoking mass, and cried,\\nWhy, Barney, what the Devil s this\\nI really think you ve made a miss\\nYou surely can t a dumpling call it\\nPoor Barney cried, Bad luck hefal it\\nI made my dumplings round and small,\\nAnd in the copper put them all\\nBut, Lord your Honor, such a rig,\\nThey all grew so confounded big,\\nAnd quarrelled so within the pot,\\nAnd got at last so nation hot,\\nThat out they all bounced, one by one\\nMy messmates never saw such fun\\nAll I could do to keep them quiet,\\nAnd stop the mutiny and riot,\\nWas, to let those who played the fool,\\nBy jumping out, lay still to cool;\\nAnd, when I had thus cooled their courage,\\nI finished them without demurrage.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0071.jp2"}, "72": {"fulltext": "34\\nPHRENOLOGY.\\nOf all Modern Sciences, few have created greater\\ndisputation than that of Phrenology, or, as understood\\nby schoolboys, the science of bumping. It appears,\\nlike the March of Intellect, to have turned the heads\\nof the wise and the weak, the serious and the profound\\nin fact, in this free knowledge age, it could not have\\nbeen better named.\\nA worthy disciple of Gall and Spurzheim, having\\nadvertized in the Dublin Morning Register for a serving\\nman, seated himself in his study to await the arrival\\nof the numerous applicants for bed and board, usually\\nattendant on such a proceeding.\\nThe first introduction was a true specimen of the\\nIrish peasantry (or pleasantry), dressed, however, at\\nall points, for the occasion for it is no uncommon thing\\nto see a child of the Emerald Isle trudging along with\\nthe simple clothing of a ragged coat, and a pair of\\nbreeches a thumping shilela, however, completing the", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0072.jp2"}, "73": {"fulltext": "PIIRLNOLOfJY.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0073.jp2"}, "74": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0074.jp2"}, "75": {"fulltext": "PHRENOLOGY. 35\\nequipment. Although it was evident that Larry OTlinn,\\nthe offspring of nature now introduced, had never\\npassed through the hands of a Drill Serjeant, he never-\\ntheless formed one of that formidable body of men, the\\nConnaught Rangers, and had figur d away at many\\na Munster Festival. The first question put to him,\\nafter having ascertained his name, was, Come, let\\nme examine your head, and see if you have the organ\\nof order. Sure, my head s clane enough any day\\nin the year, an as for order, only try me, an if I don t\\ndo all your honour orders, an a grate dale more, niver\\nbelieve I m an Irishman. I don t doubt you, Larry,\\nand I find you have the organ of talkativeness fully\\ndeveloped. Sure your honour wouldn t have me\\nhould my tongue, for by the pow rs it would bite my\\nfingers, what wages will I git, your honour? Ah!\\nthe organs of mquisitiveness, and acquisitiveness pray\\nwhat was your father, Larry? My father, your\\nhonour, bad luck to him, I niver had none! he died\\nbefore I could eat butter milk; by St. Patrick, it\\nwad have been a beautiful thing for myself if he\\nhad lived till now, for he got up in the world mightily,\\nbefore he died. Indeed how so? Fait, he couldn t\\ntie his last cravat himself, an was obliged to have\\nd 2", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0075.jp2"}, "76": {"fulltext": "36 PHRENOLOGY.\\na helper I don t exactly understand you. Oh, your\\nhonour will make me tell you then why my father was\\na dear boy for a bit of a joke, an sure I m his own child\\nthat way any how, an a beautiful hand at handling a\\nshilela. So one night he was at the fair at Ballynadoody,\\nwith the O Reilly s an the O Tooles, an the Mac Ochton s,\\nand they drank lots o the cratur, an were all very merry\\nand Barney OToole, the slanderer, tould my father\\nblack was his nose now my father s nose was as red as\\na carrot, and as round as a turnip an he gave Barney\\nsuch a backbiting blow on the back of his head, that the\\nO Toole s took it up, an a hundred shilela s were uplifted\\nan down again, before you could cry Paddy Whack an\\nwhen they shook hands again, bad luck to it! Barney\\nlay as dead as his shilela, and poor Phelim O Flinn, my\\nfather that used to be, was tried for murth ring him so\\nyour honour may guess how he was elevated, but a man\\ndon t like to own his misfortunes, when he belongs to a\\nrispictable family. Well, well, Larry, I see you possess\\nthe organ of secretiveness in one sense I hope in the other\\nsense you will keep your fingers from stealing. Sure,\\nMinny O Rourke has a heart of steel, an has been stealing\\naway my heart any time these three years, so your honour\\nmay think I ve had enough of stealing already. Again,\\namativeness, very evident. Well, Larry, I perceive most", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0076.jp2"}, "77": {"fulltext": "PHRENOLOGY.\\n37\\nof the organs you possess exemplify the tale you have\\ntold, but Beggin your honour s pardon, I niver set\\nmy eyes upon more than one organ, in all my life, an\\nthat was at the fair at Ballyraggit, and they turned a handle\\nlike a young grinstin, an You mistake me, you are\\nspeaking of a barrel organ, I was only going to observe,\\nthat you have the organs of combativeness and destruc-\\ntiveness very fully developed, and I hope you will endea-\\nvour to keep out of mischief; on those conditions I engage\\nyou. Pow rs of heaven defend your honour! ex-\\nclaimed Larry, capering on the floor, an grant that you\\nmay live for ever, an a day over, and that my own self\\nmay live to see it, and wish you joy when you die\\nDESTRUCTIVEXESS THE EARREL ORGA.V.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0077.jp2"}, "78": {"fulltext": "38\\nMODERN FASHIONABLE DANCING.\\nYe votaries of the light fantastic toe,\\nWhose attitudes are sometimes too fantastic.\\nTake heed you don t to bonnie Scotland go,\\nFor there you ll meet a curse ecclesiastic.\\nThe sturdy Cameronians hate a dance,\\nAnd hold that e en to join a reel is sinful\\nYet are they oft caught reeling, when, perchance,\\nOf mountain dew they chance to get a skinful.\\nAll ye who wear short petticoats and stays,\\nIn the Haymarket stay and dance the hays.\\nYe modish followers of Terpsichore,\\nWho walk quadrilles as stately as a Lancer\\nSurely a slow inarch ne er was meant to be\\nThe acme of perfection in a dancer", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0078.jp2"}, "79": {"fulltext": "MODERN FASHIONABLE DANCING.\\n39\\nBut, tis not fair the fair should be traduced,\\nAnd Poetry abhors the name of slander\\nThe Gallopade has now been introduced,\\nAnd Pofe-onaise admired by Alexander.\\nWhen the new year has seen the sixth new moon,\\nAnd sultry Sol reminds us to be quiet,\\nAlmack s begins and, gallope-mg in June,\\nThe belles and beaux kick up a nightly riot.\\nFashion and Folly are near a-kin no doubt\\nThe crowded ball-rooms create perspiration\\nThis may be healthy but, when at a rout,\\nLet me have ample room for respiration.\\nHOT-PRESSED", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0079.jp2"}, "80": {"fulltext": "40\\nTHE FOUNDATION\\nBRAZEN-NOSE COLLEGE.\\nTwas when King Harry s arms in France prevailed\\nWho changed his wives and creed whene er he chose\\nOne he beheaded t other he curtailed,\\nTo suit his purpose so the story goes.\\nChurchmen in those days were but jolly dogs;\\nAt least if we judge from the Church s head\\nSome, it is true, were half starved pedagogues\\nOthers, less learned, were far better fed.\\nBut nathless, there were men of better feeling\\nWho altho rich, yet felt their bowels yearning\\nIn aid of letters like Sir Francis Freeling,\\nAnd wished to give facility to learning.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0080.jp2"}, "81": {"fulltext": "CUR-TAILING.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0081.jp2"}, "82": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0082.jp2"}, "83": {"fulltext": "BRAZEN-NOSE COLLEGE. 41\\nOne of this class well known as Lincoln Will\\nA jolly, fat, good-natured sort of man,\\nHaving on earth, of good things had his fill,\\nTo turn his thoughts to Heaven now began.\\nTis said, when young, he was a roving wight,\\nAnd oft walked miles, to shrive a pretty lass\\nThat conscience now began his breast to smite,\\nFor tricks of early days but let that pass.\\nIf he had lived a life of dissolution,\\nHe knew his dissolution must be near\\nSo resolutely formed the resolution\\nOf doing something good his road to clear.\\nHe knew he could not coax the tyrant Death,\\nHe was by far too wary and uncivil.\\nAnd so made up his mind, while yet he d breath,\\nTo hoax (at least to try and hoax) the Devil.\\nThe Purgatorial Doctrines which he taught,\\nAnd Masses bought, to purge poor souls from hell,\\nHe placed no faith in, for perhaps he thought\\nA dose of Epsom salts would do as weD.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0083.jp2"}, "84": {"fulltext": "42 BRAZEN-NOSE COLLEGE.\\nHe said he d build a church but then he feared\\nThe evil one might lurk behind the door,\\nAs soon as he the stately fabric reared\\nThe more he thought, he was perplexed the more.\\nHe next thought of a Hospital, that might\\nAlleviate the sorrows which befal age\\nWhen suddenly a kind of halo bright\\nPlayed round his temples, and he cried a College,\\nHow truly fasting clears the inward man\\nThat very morning did he set to work,\\nAnd laid the first foundation of his plan,\\nBefore he deign d to touch a knife and fork.\\nLong ere the night her sable curtains drew,\\nHis system, discipline, and rules were framed\\nAnd all that now remained for him to do,\\nWas, to determine what it should be named.\\nPleased he retired, and laid him down to rest\\nMusing on his dreams of future glory\\nA-mused no doubt no doubts rose in his breast,\\nThat History some day would tell His story.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0084.jp2"}, "85": {"fulltext": "BRAZEN-NOSE COLLEGE. 43\\nThe clock struck twelve the candle burn d quite blue,\\nHe thought he oleic it out but was mistaken\\nA sight he saw, so terrible to view,\\nHe was afraid he should not save his bacon.\\nHe tried to speak but not a word could utter,\\nAlthough his teeth kept chattering in his head\\nHis pulse beat quick his heart was in a flutter\\nHe saw the Devil sitting on his bed.\\nAs every one so well his likeness knows,\\nI need not place his portrait now before ye\\nFurther than state, he had a monstrous Nose\\nOf Brass long as a monstrous Yankee story.\\nHis hat and gloves from off the bedside fell,\\nWhich he picked up and placed upon a chair\\nHe seem d as though he had a tale to tell,\\nAnd laid aside his lengthy tail with care.\\nSoft as the stream which through the valley flows,\\nWhen the last rays of daylight disappear,\\nSo soft when he began to blow his nose,\\nDid sounds enchanting strike the ravish d ear.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0085.jp2"}, "86": {"fulltext": "44\\nBRAZEN-NOSE COLLEGE.\\nNot half so sweet in after years he played\\nWhen with Tartini he played off a joke\\nUntil cock-crow this strange musician stayed,\\nThen puff he vanish d in a cloud of smoke.\\nThe Sleeper now awoke and cried aloud\\nO, Heaven forgive my sins and then arose,\\nHis College built established and endowed\\nAnd from that night he called it Brazen-Nose.\\nAN ORATOR OF BRAY S .VOb\u00c2\u00a3.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0086.jp2"}, "87": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0087.jp2"}, "88": {"fulltext": "SPARE RIB.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0088.jp2"}, "89": {"fulltext": "45\\nSUITOR JOHNNY.\\nYoung Johnny saw the lovely bride,\\nAnd for her Personals he sigh d.\\nScrapewell Hall O Scrapewell Hall\\nThou most inviting mansion\\nWhere dwells my Ellen, of worth past telling,\\nThat gives my heart expansion.\\nWith thy sweet lure, my heart secure,\\nAround it brightly hovering\\nInto my arms pour all thy charms,\\nBe they my heart s sole sovereign.\\nRib of my ribs I tell no fibs,\\nThy shining worth I m wooing\\nThy hoarded gains would ease my pains,\\nAnd save my heart s undoing.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0089.jp2"}, "90": {"fulltext": "46 SUITOR JOHNNY.\\nOh! for a while grant me thy smile,\\nAnd let it be thy pleasure\\nTo wed with me thy worth shall be\\nMy only dearest treasure.\\nGive me thy worth thy substance sum\\nSum total of affection\\nFig for thy love, give me a plum\\nRich fruit for poor digestion.\\nCome to thine arbour, hear my ardour;\\n(Thy deaf ear turn unto me)\\nYes give tis all I ask thy Hall\\nThee harbouring, I ll woo thee.\\nu Hear my fond sigh, and by this eye,\\nThat watches o er thy money,\\nThou ne er shalt see a fault in me\\nThy loving suitor, Johnny\\nHERE WE MEET TOO SOOV TO PART.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0090.jp2"}, "91": {"fulltext": "TO A LADY.\\nCELEBRATED FOR HER SKILL IX PAIXT-IXG.\\nHail Maiden skilled in Painting s magic shades,\\nPourtraying all on earth we hold most dear\\nGuido, thy guide, before thy colour fades\\nRubens and Raphael well may shed a tear.\\nThy Tints in Tint-oietto we may see\\nVandyck and Titian thou hast left behind\\nSir Joshua might a lesson take from thee\\nOf Claude some traces in thy touch we find.\\nWho can behold thy skill without a sigh,\\nThy shades like Sol when sinking in the West,\\nEclipsing e en the lightning of that eye,\\nWhere Wit and Beauty are so well exprest.\\nProceed, unrivalled, with thy daily task\\nIf to behold thy labours any seek,\\nOh grant but this one boon tis all I ask,\\nLet them approach and gaze upon thy cheek.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0091.jp2"}, "92": {"fulltext": "48\\nTHE VILLAGE SPECTRE.\\nA FEARFUL STORY.\\nI tell thee I see d un last noight in the church-\\nyearti, stalking about like the ghoast in Hamlutt at\\nplay us Wednesday noight, said the credulous Farmer\\nHodge to the incredulous village schoolmaster I see d\\nun as plain as I see thee now.\\nHe had been in vain endeavouring to convince this\\nMan of the Birch of the reality of a Ghost he had\\nseen the night before, a fact with which he had frightened\\nthe little principality out of their wits, though the parish\\nclerk was the only real wit they possessed.\\nThe truth was, this same farmer Hodge was on his way\\nfrom a neighbouring fair (it teas whispered he had seen\\nmore fairs than one) where both his standing and under-\\nstanding had been impaired, to the diminishing of his", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0092.jp2"}, "93": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0093.jp2"}, "94": {"fulltext": "HAREM SCARE M.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0094.jp2"}, "95": {"fulltext": "THE VILLAGE SPECTRE. 49\\nprofits, by too free use of the good things of this life\\nand passing through the village church-yard late in the\\nevening, with some confused idea of not being very com-\\nfortable in his mind as to time and place, he heard a\\nstrange sound, turned his eyes in the direction, and\\nbeheld a figure certainly not a phantom, for his form was\\nanything but airy, his body was covered with scales, and\\nhe was exclaiming aloud, with violent action and at in-\\ntervals there resounded a deathlike laugh, as if from the\\nvaults beneath. Every observation he made seemed, in\\nthe poor fanner s heated imagination, to apply to himself.\\nAt other times this spirit was dejected, and appeared\\nquite out of spirits nothing of the rfram-dtic in him.\\nAt length this fearful being muttered something about\\nlodge him there, which poor Hodge interpreting into\\nHodge come here, set off harum scarwm, and at\\nlength after sundry stumblings and tumblings took refuge\\nin the first house he came to (the ale house) with eyes\\ndistended and hair erect, like quills upon the fretful\\nporcupine, exclaiming that the d 1 was coming after\\nhim full gallop. This had an instantaneous- effect on the\\nvillagers assembled there, spending their Saturday night,\\nand, leaving the d 1 to pay the reckoning, they all\\nscampered home, much to the joy of their better halves,", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0095.jp2"}, "96": {"fulltext": "50 THE VILLAGE SPECTRE.\\nwho expected to find them with other spirits in their\\nnoddles, than the one which now filled their brains.\\nThe next morning many were the curious groups to\\nwhom Hodge had to relate his dreadful tale, and the\\nparish priest was in danger of having but few auditors to\\nhis spiritual exhortations, so much was the church-yard\\nfeared on account of its ghostly inhabitant.\\nThe souls as well as bodies of the people being now in\\ndanger, it was high time for the matter to be looked\\ninto. A council of four therefore met the lawyer, the\\npriest, the doctor, and the schoolmaster to debate on\\nwhat could be done to exterminate this nuisance, and it\\nwas agreed that the priest (well back d by the other\\nparish authorities) should spirit away the prince of dark-\\nness for such they had declared him.\\nAccordingly, between the hours of eleven and twelve at\\nnight, there repaired to the scene of action the three\\ngreat dignitaries aforesaid, (Law, Physic, and Divinity,)\\nattended by the parish constable with a mittimus from\\na neighbouring just-ass (no wiser than the rest) and\\na posse comitatus, who slowly kept the even tenor of\\ntheir way, until they came in sight of the apparition, in\\nthe same situation, and to the full as terrific as Hodge\\nhad depicted him the previous night.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0096.jp2"}, "97": {"fulltext": "LAW, PHYSIC, AND DIVINITY.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0097.jp2"}, "98": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0098.jp2"}, "99": {"fulltext": "THE VILLAGE SPECTRE. 51\\nFearing his flock might witness some of his devilish\\npranks to the disparagement of their morals, the priest at\\nonce began his exorcism Pater noster. He had said\\nthus much when the Demon, hearing the noise, pricked\\nup his ears, and looking towards the assembled captors\\n(no very captivating assembly) approached them. This was\\nthe signal for dispersion. A cannon ball could not have\\nsooner quelled the valorous spirit of the natives, and in\\na short time the village of D witnessed a second flight\\nas complete as the first, the poor inhabitants more alarmed\\nthan ever, making the remedy worse than the disease.\\nThe next evening was the second night of performance\\nof a company of Strolling Players, which being rather\\nan unusual sight for the village of which we chronicle,\\nthe audience was composed of all who could afford to\\nspend three-pence, the humble price of admission. Six\\no clock comes all hearts beat high with expectation\\nseven and they are comfortably seated eight and the\\nfirst act has closed, the audience in perfect good humour\\nthe second act commences they, with the greatest impa-\\ntience, waiting for the first entree when lo! to their\\nuniversal terror, a figure appears (associated with no very\\npleasant recollections as regards the major part of the\\ncompany) in a flame of ftre-^the Church-Yard Spectre!!\\ne -2", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0099.jp2"}, "100": {"fulltext": "52 THE VILLAGE SPECTRE.\\nA universal rush to the doors took place, amidst cursings\\nand swearings, and away flew the villagers for the third\\ntime, each one considering it as a judgment on himself\\nfor entering that abode of sin or, as they now thought\\nof Satan.\\nThe mystery was not solved till the following morning,\\nwhen the manager of the aforesaid strollers called upon\\nthe reverend gentleman, and stated that his company had\\nfixed their quarters in a barn contiguous to the church\\nbut wanting more space, they had ventured upon the\\nlateness of the hour to rehearse in the church yard,\\nthe entertainment of the Bottle Imp (the piece per-\\nformed for the first time, on the Monday evening), and the\\nphantom of this story was no less a personage than\\nTHE BOTTLE IMP\\nTHE DESTROYER OF MANKIND.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0100.jp2"}, "101": {"fulltext": "The\\nsubject\\nof the fol-\\nlowing Letter\\noriginated in an\\nattempt to sell at\\nTattersall s, a very cele-\\nbrated Egyptian horse of\\nHIGH METTLE,\\nCALLED HERO,\\nin his own country of high value,\\nbut whose vicious temper finally\\nbrought him under the hammer at\\nAldridge s where the base lovers of\\nLOW METAL\\nsuffered the brave animal to be knocked down\\nfor the sum of Three Pounds (Addressed by\\nthe owner of this noble animal to his friend in London.)\\nEGYPT S LAMENT.\\nAt the result of your enquiries,\\nThe Red Sea raged loud ioar d Osiris,\\nNo crocodile could longer brook,\\nIn slumber tranquilly to snooze\\nUpon the Nile s insulted ooze.\\nWith passion Pompey s pillar shook!\\nIn fiercest flames of wounded pride,\\nWas the last drop of gravy fried,\\nOf Cleopatra s needle s eye.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0101.jp2"}, "102": {"fulltext": "54 Egypt s lament.\\nThe Mummies, (for their jaws were locked,\\nLooking however deeply shocked,)\\nCould only groan and sigh.\\nThe Pyramids, whose firm built nest\\nNo hurricane could e er molest,\\nBy time s nails quite unscratched\\nWho brooding sate upon the earth,\\nFor ages yet to nought gave birth,\\nAnd only wonder hatch d,\\nCurvetting like brisk May-born lambs,\\nOr jumpers in putrescent hams,\\nWith indignation bounded.\\nWhile the ^Enigma-loving Sphinx\\nDeclared with many tear-fraught winks,\\nHer own brains half confounded.\\nEach Mosque in Alexandria frets\\nGrand Cairo s tell-tale minarets\\nAnd muezzins proclaim,\\nThe terms with which the recreant Mews\\nHad dared to injure and abuse,\\nA fam d Egyptian name.\\nThe genius of the desart howl d,\\nThe Arab s darkling visage scowl d,\\nRe-echoed bello wings ran", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0102.jp2"}, "103": {"fulltext": "EGYPT S LAMENT. 55\\nWhile camels tossed their high heads higher,\\n(Excited less by thirst than ire,)\\nThroughout each caravan.\\nUp started Pharaoh s angry ghost,\\nFrom right to left kick d all his host,\\nAnd vehemently swore,\\nTo hear such falsehoods plagu d him worse,\\n(For he d enjoyed curse after curse)\\nThan all his plagues before.\\nOh may each sland rer s stubborn neck\\nThe halter s cravat straight bedeck,\\nAnd to the rack be tied\\nTheir teeth let jagged pitchforks pick,\\nAnd rusty curiycombs thick stick\\nIn each tormented hide\\nMay twitches their pinch d nostrils clinch,\\nTheir tails be dock t inch after inch,\\nEars fox t and sinews blistered\\nMay iron shoes, red hissing hot,\\nBe nailed on ev ry corn they ve got,\\nWho have such scandal whispered..\\nSweet persecuted saint, whose mood\\nIs thus so little understood\\nShould he his hoof uplift", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0103.jp2"}, "104": {"fulltext": "56 Egypt s lament.\\nTis but a mark of condescension,\\nA test of courtesy s extension,\\nAs proved by sage Dean Swift.*\\nI d rather give him to the hounds,\\nThan barter for mere twenty pounds\\nThis pattern of horse heroes\\nWhose manners degage and free,\\nThose sons of muck and dung agree\\nAre truculent as Nero s.\\nBecause, forsooth, he neighs aloud,\\nOf inborn worth and vigour proud,\\nPaws, snorts, and rears his crest\\nHis voice, shape, movements, eye of fire,\\nThe lineage of his dam and sire,\\nMost brilliantly confest.\\nBut worldly wisdom cries retract,\\nNor further meditate the act,\\nOf giving dogs such dinners\\nThese pounds, tho few, had best be spent,\\nIn cordial drops of merriment,\\nFor self and social sinners\\nGulliver s Voyage to the Houyhnmns.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0104.jp2"}, "105": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0105.jp2"}, "106": {"fulltext": "SEVENTY-FOUR AND A TENDER.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0106.jp2"}, "107": {"fulltext": "57\\nMY GRENADIER.\\nWhen first I saw my Grenadier,\\nAnd ran away from home,\\nIn tears I left my granny-dear,\\nA Soldier s wife to roam.\\nFor he was handsome, when he smiled\\nI own I loved him rather\\nHe said I was my father s child,\\nNow he is my child s father.\\nWhen first we wed, it must he owned,\\nDame Fortune smiled on us\\nFor years, mis-fortune now has frowned,\\nAnd we have felt her curse.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0107.jp2"}, "108": {"fulltext": "58 MY GRENADIER.\\nLong time I trudged the wide world o er,\\nAnd cheerful bore the pack,\\nBut now my pack is quite a bore,\\nWith children at my back.\\nThat soldiers live a happy life,\\nI own I once thought true,\\nBut would not be a soldier s wife\\nCould I my life renew.-\\nIn battle, I got in the rear,\\nFor fear of Congreve rockets,\\nAnd used to rock my baby dear,\\nAnd pick dead soldiers pockets.\\nHis cap and feather in the fight,\\nWere shot away once, slap,\\nBut all his comrades said, twas quite\\nA feather in his cap.\\nOnce in a battle, standing by,\\nTo hold the Colonel s pie-ball,\\nA bullet struck my soldier s eye,\\nThey said it was an eye-ball.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0108.jp2"}, "109": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0109.jp2"}, "110": {"fulltext": "A MATCH TOO MUCH BRIMSTONE.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0110.jp2"}, "111": {"fulltext": "MY GRENADIER. 59\\nI ve heard him talk of storming towns,\\nAnd taking by assault,\\nBut now Lord how he storms and frowns\\nIf I forget the salt.\\nHe talks sometimes of breaches made,\\nOf ambuscades he brags\\nBut now his breeches, I m afraid,\\nAre almost worn to rags.\\nAh once he used to shoulder amis.\\nNo red-coat ever bolder\\nBut now he s got, thro war s alarms.\\nBut one arm left to shoulder.\\nThere was a time he said, that I\\nPossessed his soul s dominion\\nI know that that is all my eye,\\nHe has changed his opinion.\\nAh once his polished bag-o-net\\nThro Frenchmen s bodies ran\\nNow cabbage nets we two do net,\\nTo cabbage what we can.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0111.jp2"}, "112": {"fulltext": "60 MY GRENADIER.\\nOnce too he wore a coat of red,\\nAnd knapsack at his back\\nNow coat and back, it may be said,\\nHave neither nap nor sack.\\nWhen young he used to be a beau,\\nHow time poor men abuses\\nSometimes he fiddles as we go,\\nAnd then his bow he uses.\\nAnd when we danc d sometimes all night,\\nWhat handsome legs he d show\\nBut now one leg is shrivelled quite,\\nAnd one s a timber toe.\\nI know his match, I ve often said,\\nCould not on earth be found\\nBy matches now we gain our bread,\\nAnd trudge the country round.\\nBut still he is my Grenadier,\\nAnd still I am his Fanny\\nI wish I still lov d him as dear,\\nAs once I lov d dear Granny.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0112.jp2"}, "113": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0113.jp2"}, "114": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0114.jp2"}, "115": {"fulltext": "61\\nCOMPOSING AND DE-COMPOSING.\\nMusic hath charms to soothe the savage breast.\\nThe soothing powers of Music have been celebrated\\nfrom the remotest ages, when David played before Saul\\nand in profane history we are told that the art, as practised\\nby Orpheus, possessed the charm of consigning even the\\nlynx-eyed guardian of the infernal regions, into the anus\\nof M-Orpheus. In our own days the effects are much\\nthe same, for cast your eyes round the King s Theatre\\nduring the performance of Rossini s most elaborate recita-\\ntivos, and you will rind many of the dilettanti wholly un-\\nconscious of the floating sounds, and tasting the sweets of\\ngreat nature s second source. If, therefore, the Italian\\nOpera, the fountain head of music in this country, where\\nneither pains nor expence are spared to obtain performers\\nof the greatest celebrity, administers to part of the audi-\\ntory a gentle opiate, can we wonder, when Lord R.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0115.jp2"}, "116": {"fulltext": "62 COMPOSING AND DE-COMPOSING.\\ngranted an interview to Signor Solini, and suffered the\\ninfliction of some sixty pages of recitativos and arias\\n(not very airy,) of a new opera which he wished to force\\ndown John Bull s throat, that, on turning to ask his Lord-\\nship s opinion of the opening chorus of the third act, just\\nconcluded, Solini should find his noble patron, insensible\\nto the beauties of melody, enjoying a very comfortable\\nnap.\\nBut music does not always act thus if it has its piano,\\nit has also its forte, and veiy frequently a piano-forte. A\\nbag-pipe has been known to revive the ardour and re-kindle\\nthe courage of a regiment of Highlanders, when their\\ndefeat and retreat seemed inevitable, and to make them\\nfight like lions. The dying war-horse will start from the\\nground, in the agonies of death, on hearing the brazen\\ntrumpet sound the well-known charge and the scraping\\nof a three-stringed fiddle at a wake, will set Paddy s heart\\nin a blaze, and, in the pleasures of a lilt, efface the remem-\\nbrance of the loudest sorrow. I say loudest, because, in\\nIreland, the quantum of sorrow is measured by the howls\\nof the mourner.\\nSir Charles fancied himself a first-rate violinist, and if\\nthe old adage be true, that practice makes perfect, he\\ncertainly had arrived at perfection. One morning, when\\nin the midst of one of Mori s Pot Pourris, his ears were", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0116.jp2"}, "117": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0117.jp2"}, "118": {"fulltext": "ONL liCUAPEIl AT A DOOR ENOUGH.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0118.jp2"}, "119": {"fulltext": "COMPOSING AND DE-COMPOSING. 63\\nvery unceremoniously assailed, by the scratching of an\\nold blind fiddler executing Maggie Lauder in flats and\\nsharps, immediately under his window, in the most un-\\nnatural manner. It was but the impulse of a moment to\\nring the bell, and desire John to drive the utterer of coun-\\nterfeit notes away from the door. This was not, however,\\nso easily accomplished. The scraper demurred to this\\nsummary sentence of transportation, and would not be kept\\nat bay, for though out of sight he was not out of mind, and\\ncontinued so long within hearing, that the amateur wished\\nhim hanged, and was obliged to suspend his performance.\\nThe next day, at the same hour, while Sir Charles was\\npractising the same subject, came the itinerant scraper of\\ncat-gut the same orders were repeated w ith the addi-\\ntion, that he was to evacuate the street altogether. This\\nhowever, the melodious murderer declined doing al-\\nleging, that he was a poor old man, who subsisted upon\\nthe charity awakened by his fiddle, that many benevolent\\nladies and gentlemen lived in that street, who were in the\\nhabit of throwing him half-pence, the loss of which would\\nto him be a very great privation. Sir Charles was glad to\\npurchase an honourable peace, on the terms prescribed by\\nhis enemy, viz. six-pence per week, being satisfied that\\none scraper at his door was sufficient.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0119.jp2"}, "120": {"fulltext": "64\\nFRIEND OF MY SOUL.\\nLAST EDITION.\\nFriend of my soul, this tankard sip,\\nTwill banish care and fear,\\nTis not so hot as gin or flip,\\nBut ah tis good strong beer\\nLike their delusive dreams\\nTwill gently soothe thy mind,\\nBut when next morning beams,\\nIt leaves no fumes behind.\\nCome take my hat, thy face to shade,\\nThe sun shines hot at noon\\nLike Phoebus rays thy cheeks may fade,\\nBut ah not half so soon.\\nFor tho thy charms decay,\\nThou still art in my sight,\\nBut Phoebus shines by day,\\nAnd leaves us every night.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0120.jp2"}, "121": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0121.jp2"}, "122": {"fulltext": "THE SCHOOLMASTER ABROAD.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0122.jp2"}, "123": {"fulltext": "65\\nON BATHING.\\nOh who lias never dabbled in the sea,\\nOr else seen others dabble tis the same\\nFor all go to be seen or eke to see\\nAmphibious animals without a name.\\nSoon as the summer s sun begins to shine,\\nAnd oftentimes before\u00e2\u0080\u0094 what crowds flock down\\nBillingsgate beauties, beaus who slaughter swine,\\nFly from the dust of London s dusty town.\\nOh! then, the splashing in the sea begins,\\nFat chubby nymphs are soused and soused again,\\nImmersed in ocean to their very chins,\\nRegardless how they weep, scream, or complain.\\nF", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0123.jp2"}, "124": {"fulltext": "66 ON BATHING.\\nI don t like that great ugly woman Ma\\nShe took me off my legs and plump d me in\\nBefore I was aware I never saw\\nSo strange a creature, naught but bone and skin.\\nOh never mind the fright, my dear consider\\nHow very healthy a cold bath is deemed\\nOf all your freckles too, you must get rid, or\\nElse your charms will never be esteemed.\\nA sort of hydro-mania seems to rage\\nIn every bosom, whether young or old,\\nFemale or male. Both sexes, every age\\nDoes Neptune in his briny arms enfold.\\nWhen sable night her starry night-cap wore,\\nAnd was in bed, most comfortably tucked up,\\nOld Boreas once became a shocking bore,\\nAnd walls knocked down, and palisadoes plucked up.\\nAt morn the wind blew fresh, tho salt the sea\\nThere was a little fat bald-headed man\\nFew ventured out\u00e2\u0080\u0094 yet boldly vent ring he,\\nHis carcase launched from out the caravan.\\nPleased with his skill, he like a porpus rolled,\\nPlunging and splashing, tumbling o er and o er,", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0124.jp2"}, "125": {"fulltext": "A COLD LATH.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0125.jp2"}, "126": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0126.jp2"}, "127": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0127.jp2"}, "128": {"fulltext": "A HOT BATH.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0128.jp2"}, "129": {"fulltext": "ON BATHING. 67\\nWhen a fierce wave made him let go his hold,\\nAnd landed him stark naked on the shore\\nConfused, ashamed, poor Toby scrambled back,\\nAmid the shouts and laughter of the throng,\\nAnd quickly left the town but was, alack\\nFor months the theme of many a merry song.\\nBut there are baths more like thy spring Oh Iceland\\nThy boiling Geyser! gazed on for its heat.\\nThose who love ices, say thou art a n-ice land,\\nI don t mean Isis, famed as learning s seat.\\nI wonder Tawnies from Hindostan s coast,\\nNe er ventured to pay homage at thy shrine,\\nThou queen of hot-wells Bath itself can t 1\\nSo very hot a hot-bath, as is thine.\\nBoth Cheltenham and Harrow gate are swarming,\\n(Fam d for salt waters, not a briny sea)\\nWith their sweet baths how many take a warming.\\nAnd purge or purify themselves with glee.\\nWithin the -vapour bath some sit and quaff\\nSulphureous fumes imported fresh from h 11.\\nThe very devils sit below and laugh,\\nTo see their plans on earth succeed so well.\\nf2", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0129.jp2"}, "130": {"fulltext": "68 ON BATHING.\\nThen there s shampooing I d almost forgot it\\nHow truly is it called both sham and pooh-ing,\\nRubbing and tickling by a black od rot it\\nWhat next, I wonder, will mad folks be doing.\\nLast, tho not least, the pumping bath I name,\\nTis celebrated only of late years\\nBut well approved, established quite its fame,\\nAnd pumping now of wondrous use appears.\\nDoes but your leg, your arm, or shoulder ache,\\nYou ll find your surgeon has forthwith prescribed,\\nThat you ten yards of aqua pumpis take,\\nThree times a day, as here below described.\\nA CURE FOR SLEIGHT OF HAND.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0130.jp2"}, "131": {"fulltext": "69\\nPUNS ON PUNNING;\\nOR,\\nHINTS TO A PUNSTER.\\nA good Pun like good pun-ch must possess plenty of\\nspirit, but care must be taken that it does not call forth\\na pun-ch on the head, as is generally the case with ptm~\\nchinello. This, however, cannot always be avoided, as\\nthose who make puns seldom stand on pim-ctilio. He\\nwho attempts to pun, must be able to give it punto,\\nand it is also requisite that, if he expects to escape w itli\\nim-pun-ity, he should be well provided with contra-\\npunto. Although it is not necessary that a punster\\nshould be pun-ctaal, yet in order to make a pun stir, he", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0131.jp2"}, "132": {"fulltext": "70\\nHINTS ON PUNNING.\\nshould carefully avoid any thing puny, and attend to\\njwm-ctuation. To conclude a pun, like currie powder,\\nis nothing without it is pun-gent, but if it should meet\\nwith punishment, it can only be submitted to like\\nPATIENCE ON A PUN-CHEON.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0132.jp2"}, "133": {"fulltext": "71\\nTHE\\nWATERMAN S SOLILOQUY.\\nWell things are coming to a pretty pass,\\nI think the end o th world will soon begin\\nSome years ago, I used to get a glass\\nO gin an 5 bitters now I gets no gin,\\nBut lots o bitters. Now an honest man\\nCan t get no work no, blow me if he can.\\nWe shaVt be able soon to see our way,\\nThere s such a sight o bridges building now\\nAnd then they ll want gas lights to burn all day,\\nBut they won t take one lighter-man in tow.\\nMy poor old wherry s wery near worn out\\nFolks never think o taking wherries now", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0133.jp2"}, "134": {"fulltext": "72 THE WATERMAN.\\nAnd I have got the rheumatiz an gout\\nBut how to get clear on em I don t know.\\nThe Steamers, tho they do make lots of smoke,\\nUsed once to bring us many a bite an sup\\nBut now folks walk ashore a pretty joke\\nI wish them cursed quays were all locked up.\\n1 know the time, when I ve earned two-pun-ten\\nIn sixpences, a dozen at a time\\nSuch days as those I ne er shall see again\\nI m getting old I ve long been past my prime.\\nThen, cause we ve got no bridges there s Brunei\\nMust build one under ground the curs d Thames Tunnel\\nMy eye if he but knowed what I could tell,\\nHow we contrived to make his work a funnel\\nI dare say we shall soon have on the water\\nSteam omnibuses plying for a fare\\nIf so why then thank God I ve lost my daughter\\nAn my old woman\u00e2\u0080\u0094 they re a happy pair\\nThings seem to be a-goin upside down\\nCarts, horses, waggons, porters with their loads,\\nGo under all the new bridges in town,\\nAnd arches now cross over streets an roads.\\nPerhaps the Thames will be Macadamized,\\nAnd broad wheel waggons roll along like thunder\\nHM.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0134.jp2"}, "135": {"fulltext": "THE WATERMAN.\\n73\\nAnd if they do\u00e2\u0080\u0094 I shouldn t be surprised,\\nI ve seen such strange things, nothing makes me wonder.\\nOnce after plying heartily all day,\\nTom Tug an I could play a game o 1 skittles\\nNow plying hard won t earn enough to pay\\nFor bacca, lodgin, washin, and my wittles.\\nA SCULL-ING MATCH.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0135.jp2"}, "136": {"fulltext": "74\\nAN ESSAY ON A BOOT.\\nAn Essay on a Boot ha ha It betrays a most\\nlamentable paucity of subjects, when a person soberly sits\\ndown to write an essay upon such a tough subject. But\\nthanks to Spectator, Rambler and Co., they have so well\\ndisposed of all the good ones, that after-writers are left\\nwithout a leg to stand on so I prefer a boot.\\nIt has been truly said that you may write an Essay\\nupon nothing. Nothing occurs more frequently in the\\nEnglish language than nothing and nothing is com-\\nmoner with us than nothing nothing like sense can be\\nmade of this word nothing. You might write a chapter\\nof nothings which, by-the-bye, many authors do. But I\\nam wandering from my subject, and that without consi-\\nderation for who would wander without his boot, unless\\nhe expected to make his fortune, by turning flint stones\\ninto patent corn cutters.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0136.jp2"}, "137": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0137.jp2"}, "138": {"fulltext": "BOOTS.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0138.jp2"}, "139": {"fulltext": "AN ESSAY ON A BOOT. 75\\nI have chosen an individual Boot for my subject, a\\nsingular choice certainly, but I made sure of the\\nfirst idea, the last in hand, and my awl to boot still,\\nto make assurance doubly sure, I will pare off a little\\nof my tough material to introduce a tougher, that\\nuseful understrapper of the household, or stable-yard\\ndomestic, well fitted like a shoe to the Inn and out-\\nofhces, Boots whose person would betray that\\nhe stands in-kneed, as well as his purse, although it\\nmay be said, he draws from hand and foot; unlike\\nthe fiddler, who gets more kicks than halfpence. The\\nmost brilliant black-legs shine brighter in his hands.\\nIn his own handi-craft, proverbially sly, they employ\\ntheir craft in vain to find Booty on his slippery person.\\nBy its testimony, a Boot may establish the doctrine set\\nup as to the power of language in the brute creation for\\nhow rarely do we see a lady s boot without a tongue\\nand I should incline to look upon this boot with venera-\\ntion, considering the kingly company it may have entered\\nagain, with a feeling of vanity, as by the aid of Day\\nand Martin s best, it is more than probable- it may serve\\nthe purpose of a looking glass.\\nBut very cynical critics will say that it is easy to write\\nnonsense on any subject (so it is) and further that this", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0139.jp2"}, "140": {"fulltext": "76 AN ESSAY ON A BOOT.\\nmy protege could not apply itself to any honourable\\nemployment I would ask how often this very boot may\\nhave been raised to seats of honour I will also endeavour\\nto face these worthies to their very teeth, inasmuch as I\\nfacetiously believe in the mental superiority of a boot,\\nfor who can deny that the noblest part of man is his\\nunder-standing? What handicraft would make a boot\\nwithout a sole And who will say that it is not ever-\\nlasting, seeing that a boot is always made to last.\\nIf however the subject of my essay has not become a\\nhandy member of society, (all agree that it is rendered\\nsubservient to one member the foot) it can only be\\naccounted for by the fact of its having originally been\\ncowed for are not the instances innumerable, of a noble\\nsoul having been in the end trampled upon and trodden\\nunder foot\\nEXPANSION OF THE UNDER-STANDING.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0140.jp2"}, "141": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0141.jp2"}, "142": {"fulltext": "COMMITTING FORGERY.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0142.jp2"}, "143": {"fulltext": "77\\nA GREAT SINNER.\\nI am a very wicked man\\nAs e er was left unhung,\\nSince I to learn my trade began\\nWhen I was very young.\\nIn Forgery I m an adept\\nIt truly may be said,\\nFor by my forge myself I ve kept\\nAnd earned my daily bread.\\nWhen at the anvil, Joe and me\\nFor work have doffed our coats,\\nIf you looked in, you d find that we\\nWere issuing forged notes.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0143.jp2"}, "144": {"fulltext": "A GREAT SINNER.\\nBy picking locks I ve gained much wealth,\\nI ve broken open doors,\\nI ve entered houses too by stealth,\\nBy dozens and by scores.\\nThere s not a Vice that you can name,\\nOf which I m not possessed\\nMy works will prove it to my shame,\\nAnd yet I am caressed.\\nThe worst remains yet to be told,\\nRemorse my bosom swells,\\nFor love of lucre filthy gain,\\nI have, alas hung Belles.\\nWith all my faults the noise and strife\\nIn which I ve passed my days\\nI never led a vicious life,\\nBut strove to merit praise.\\nTo all, this sound advice I give,\\nNor let it be forgot\\nIf prosp rously you wish to live,\\nStrike while the Iron s hot", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0144.jp2"}, "145": {"fulltext": "79\\nTHE\\nBLUE-STOCKING BELLE.\\nLord Cabandash loved a young lady,\\nA belle of the stockings of blue:\\nAnd many a subterfuge made he,\\nTo obtain her permission to woo\\nMy Lord was a lover of ladies,\\nAnd bright eyes liked better than wine,\\nHad seen all the beauties of Cadiz\\nAnd those on the banks of the Rhine\\nHad sigh d to the fair in the city,\\nAnd vowed to the belle of the ball\\nDevoted himself to the witty,\\nBut the blue-belle was dearer than all.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0145.jp2"}, "146": {"fulltext": "80 THE BLUE-STOCKING BELLE.\\nLike a ghost, this fair one he haunted,\\nWherever she went would repair\\nNear her in the church he had chaunted\\nAnd mingled his sighs with a prayer.\\nA box at the opera had taken\\nTo see, and be seen, by mamma\\nHis elbow at Crockford s had shaken,\\nIn hopes to be known to papa\\nAnd thus, every means he invented,\\nTo know and be known to the fair,\\nFate somehow or other, prevented\\nSave, when she was taking the air.\\nShe like an invisible fairy,\\nIn parties was not to be seen\\nBut would in the park, when unwary,\\nFlit by like a shade on the green\\nThen after her carriage he capered,\\nTo try to o ertake her he flew,\\nShe saw how he started and vapoured\\nLike one with the Tic doloureux\\nBut, like the fair flower she resembled,\\nShe modestly hung down her head", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0146.jp2"}, "147": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0147.jp2"}, "148": {"fulltext": "FORLORN IIOI L.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0148.jp2"}, "149": {"fulltext": "THE BLUE STOCKING BELLE. 81\\nTurn d from his wild gazing and trembled,\\nAnd conjectured his reason had fled.\\nHe heard she was all love and duty,\\nProfound too in classical lore\\nHe saw she was young and a beauty,\\nAnd what would his Lordship have more\\nNot to love the fair fascination,\\nWhat argument could be deduced\\nAlas to his heart s palpitation,\\nHe never could get introduced.\\nA friend offered soon to present him,\\nAs soon as the blue belle came out\\nWho told him he sure would repent him.\\nEre to leap he should first look about.\\nAt length nothing more could delight him\\nticket was sent for a ball,\\nHope deferred now came to requite him.\\nAnd happiness seemed to recal.\\nWith rapture he dwelt on the meeting,\\nAnd all the fine things he would say\\nIn fancy he pictured her greeting\\nHer eloquence how she d display.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0149.jp2"}, "150": {"fulltext": "82 THE BLUE STOCKING BELLE.\\nIn speaking, and blushing, and smiling,\\nHe thought on the fair of his choice\\nAbove all, how sweetly beguiling,\\nThe eloquent tones of her voice.\\nThe pains which he took in attiring\\nThe twisting of this way and that\\nHe puzzled himself with admiring\\nThe tie of his unique cravat\\nHis hair was brushed up a-la-Brutus\\nHis whiskers were cut to the tip,\\nAs fierce as the fam d William Rufus,\\nMustachios curled over the lip.\\nWith puffing, and stuffing, and wadding,\\nAnd, wasp-like, pinch d in at the waist\\nCompleting his figure by padding,\\nHe call d for his carnage in haste.\\nBut oh! when the ball room he entered,\\nNot thinking of sorrows to come j\\nTo address his beloved he ventured,\\nAnd found to his grief she was dumb\\nHer mother was sitting before her,\\nApplications began on to preach", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0150.jp2"}, "151": {"fulltext": "THE BLUE STOCKING BELLE.\\n83\\nAnd told the devoted adorer\\nThat her daughter was wanting in speech.\\nFrom her presence, distracted he flew,\\nLeaving this for her mother to tell,\\nLet her stockings be ever so blue,\\nI never can wed a Dumb Belle!\\nA DUMB WAITER.\\ng2", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0151.jp2"}, "152": {"fulltext": "84\\nSONNET ON A LAP DOG.\\nBY A LADY.\\nDear Innocent, sit still upon my lap,\\nAnd there shalt thou still sit and lap thy milk\\nOn my silk dress lie down and eat thy pap,\\nAnd I will dress thy downy coat of silk.\\nThough not in vain I tell thee to lie down,\\nA lie thy tongue has never yet told me\\nThou hast a long and bushy tail I own,\\nAnd yet no tell-tale have I e er found thee.\\nSometimes it must be owned that thou dost whine,\\nYet thou in wine committest no excess.\\nOft with eclat, my darling, dost thou shine,\\nAnd sometimes do thy claws destroy my dress.\\nThough not obliged to beg, it may be said,\\nUpon thy latter end thou sitt st to beg thy bread.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0152.jp2"}, "153": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0153.jp2"}, "154": {"fulltext": "TRAVELLERS SEE STRANGE THINGS.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0154.jp2"}, "155": {"fulltext": "85\\nA TALE OF THE ROAD.\\nWho has not travelled up or clown the road.\\nOr who has never rode upon the highway\\nWho on high roads has ne er a horse bestrode,\\nOr on a donkey crawled along a by-way\\nThat travellers see strange things, none e er deny,\\nEspecially if in strange parts they travel\\nBut those who tell whate er has met their eye\\nAt home, leave not such wonders to unravel.\\nLa Roche at Cheltenham gained his livelihood,\\nBy teaching John Bull s daughters how to dance\\nThe Polonaise, Mazurka, Waltz, and stood\\nIn high esteem, because he came from France.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0155.jp2"}, "156": {"fulltext": "86 A TALE OF THE ROAD.\\nWhen about two years there had rolled away,\\nSome business called him up to London s city\\nHe came, and after two or three days stay,\\nWished to return but here begins my ditty.\\nI think I told you Monsieur came from France,\\nI should have said that he was a Parisian,\\nAnd though well qualified to teach la danse,\\nHe was a sorry English rhetorician.\\nThe coach office he entered, Please you, sare,\\nI vant to go upon de coach s top\\nTo-morrow morning combien is de fare\\nTo Chat-ty-ham and there he made a stop.\\nSix shillings, was the answer. Monsieur stared\\nW 7 hen he came up, it one pound four had cost.\\nHe shrugged his shoulders, but he little cared,\\nIf he got home, how little cash he lost.\\nHe paid the money, thinking very wisely\\nThe office keeper was mistaken surely\\nNo matter that, it suited him precisely\\nTo save his money, though not very poor-ly.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0156.jp2"}, "157": {"fulltext": "A TALE OF THE ROAD. 87\\nNext morning early was the Frenchman there,\\nAnd soon upon the coach top he was seated\\nPleased with himself, to think how in the fare,\\nThe coachman he had thus so fairly cheated.\\nAt length all duly packed, away they roll,\\nThe cries of London fading in the wind\\nTrue as the magnet pointing to the pole,\\nThe pole is followed by the wheels behind.\\nBeside him sate two sailors laughing loud\\nMonsieur had not a single sentence spoken,\\nAnd after three horns travelling in a cloud\\nOf dust, the Frenchman s silence thus was broken.\\nSal ve not stop some vere to break ouv fast\\nOh yes, and dine too if you like, said Jack,\\nu But breakfast time, I think, is now time past,\\nAnd I hope soon a round of beef to hack.\\nThe Frenchman paused, but not without surprise.\\nSoon afterwards they gained a hilly ridge,\\nFrom whence a winding river met his eyes,\\nWith boats and shipping over it a bridge", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0157.jp2"}, "158": {"fulltext": "88 A TALE OF THE ROAD.\\nMonsieur enquired, Pray vat bridge is dat, sare\\nTis Rochester, 5 said Jack. Monsieur looked blue\\nNo, you mistake, dat can t be Ro-ches-tare.\\nWhy what d ye mean, you d d French parleyvoo,\\nSaid Jack tis Rochester, and that I ll swear.\\nOh, had you seen the Frenchman s face Got dam,\\nHe roared, for what bring me to Ro-ches-tare\\nI pay de fare to go to Chat-ty-ham.\\nThe Frenchman raved and stormed, he curs d aloud\\nIn French and English, dancing up and down\\nAnd when the coach stopt, he drew quite a crowd\\nOutside the Inn door twas in Chatham town.\\nOn the coach top Monsieur maintained his seat,\\nNor would get down, not e en his fast to break\\nHe swore it was a most infernal cheat,\\nAnd would not listen to the word, mistake.\\nHe cursed the horses, and he d d the coach,\\nVenting his spleen on all, he sat and chafed\\nPoor coachee, too, came in for his reproach\\nThe more he swore, the more the rabble laughed.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0158.jp2"}, "159": {"fulltext": "A TALE OF THE ROAD. 89\\nHe heeded not the jeers and jokes around,\\nFierce in his bosom still his anger burned\\nBoldly aloft, the Frenchman kept his ground,\\nAnd in the afternoon the coach returned.\\nNext morning to the Mansion-house he went,\\nBefore the Lord Mayor his complaint to lay,\\nTo state his grievance, to his rage give vent,\\nAnd make poor coachee his expenses pay.\\nAh Monseigneur pardon Monsieur Lor Mare,\\nI yesterday took coach to go from town\\nTo Chat-ty-ham, and I did pay de fare,\\nWhen dat dam tief in Shatham put me down,\\nOne hunder mile from vere I vant to go\\nAsk him my Lor, de rogue cannot deny\\nWhat now I say, ask him if tis not so\\nThe Lord Mayor smiled, and coachee made reply.\\nMy Lord, this here French Mounseer paid his fare,\\nAnd said to Chat-ty-ham he wish d to go\\nBut when at Chatham, Lord how he did swear,\\nBecause I drove him there That s all I know.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0159.jp2"}, "160": {"fulltext": "90\\nA TALE OF THE ROAD.\\nAnd after much cross questioning, they found\\nTwas Cheltenham th unlucky Frenchman meant\\nThat Chattyham being like it in sound,\\nHad caused his being down to Chatham sent.\\nIn vain they told him that it was all fair,\\nThe blunder lay in his pronunciation\\nMonsieur bounced out, first damning the Lord Mayor,\\nThe coach, the coachman, and the English nation.\\nA BRITISH CHARGE DE FARE.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0160.jp2"}, "161": {"fulltext": "91\\nA SKETCH\\nTAKEN FROM REAL LIFE.\\n\u00c2\u00aefje Character of tf)e \u00c2\u00aettr Btgltsfj Yeoman.\\nI shall not look upon his like again.\\nShakspeare.\\nThis pillar of Old England is nearly crumbled away\\nthis characteristic of a nation, certainly great in modern\\nhistory, is a by-gone. It is grievous to find by what\\nslow imperceptible paces the sturdy mind becomes\\nparalized, and assumes a new cast. But we cannot\\nallow by-gones to be altogether by-gones let us\\nkeep awhile to this order of inversion, and no longer\\nviewing the die as cast, with the defunct Falstaff, cast\\nthe die in a brief essay on the imaginary return to life\\nof the laughter-loving, laughter-moving Knight.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0161.jp2"}, "162": {"fulltext": "92 A SKETCH.\\nThus Sir John revives, and, in musing mood, thinks\\nof olden times and ancient haunts he revisits Old\\nEngland, but quick discerns that the merry days in\\nthe North and South are fled. He stalks to the East\\ntheu strides along in swoln passion to the West, and\\nthere his mournful ire is somewhat quenched, his\\nmirthful air returns. Arrived at a good old farm house\\nbarns well stored, and fields well stocked cattle fat\\nand sleek, chirping birds and chuckling broods chubby\\nbrats in their leathern dicks, running about the village,\\nlike frisking lambs in playful gambol labourers with\\nlook contented, and, in their daily toil, the heart vying\\nwith the hand. At this scene our joyous Knight puts on\\nhis wonted joyful smile, and with jollity of soul seeks out\\nthe happy owner of the spot. Lustily he shouts to some\\nmerry chaps keeping up the ball on light fantastic toe,\\nwho respond that Farmer Stubbs is now coming up the\\nroad jogging homewards. FalstafF espies an old white\\ngalloway with ears and tail as nature gave them (in other\\ncrops the farmer took a pride) and on Jenny s back\\nsits a fine old man, of height and breadth, in form and\\nfeature, a model of by-gone times, when the true genuine\\nEnglish Yeoman grew his full growth, and lived all\\nhis life, instead of existing, as now, merely to endure", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0162.jp2"}, "163": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0163.jp2"}, "164": {"fulltext": "ROUND OF BEEF.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0164.jp2"}, "165": {"fulltext": "A SKETCH. 93\\nexistence with thick and well ribbed leggings capping\\nhis knees, to save his thin grey hose and joints within\\nalike from perishing and over his well-worn coat, a\\ncloth armour, called a spencer, as a shield against that\\nformidable trio of wind, rain, and cold. Falstaff and the\\nFanner met, and reciprocated the well-known salutation\\nand shake of past times, the honest heart responding to\\nthe hand. Master Stubbs with all the homeliness of Old\\nEnglish hospitality, exclaims, Come in, friend, come in,\\nit is now meal time my Dame, mayhap, has got some\\nround of beef, and flitch of bacon do step in, friend, let\\nus first break bread together, then from our own good\\nbrewing get merry, and afterwards walk and talk. It\\nis real Heart all, the best bit, the best sup, and the best\\nseat at mine host s board, for the welcome stranger. The\\ncomfortable meal is taken, the yet more comforting\\nforty winks enjoyed.\\nFalstaff with his friend then stroll out to survey, at\\nease, this and that improvement of his land, the farmer\\nbeguiling the way with the solid remarks and ex-\\nperience of a man who, by making nature his study,\\nhas raised himself in intellect and independence above\\nhis fellow beings. The Knight grows more enamoured\\nof his companion, and, returning to the farm-house,", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0165.jp2"}, "166": {"fulltext": "94 A SKETCH.\\nbespeaks a bed to tarry the night; one of suitable\\ndimensions is accordingly erected firm as a scaffolding\\nin the Store Room. Falstaff, now taking double sight,\\nenjoys the prospect of a roasted barn-door fowl for\\nsupper, and tankard of real October. His platter\\nwell plenished, to his no small amazement and amuse-\\nment, the hostess puts a basin of boiled milk before.\\nthe old yeoman, who as quietly puts to it divers ingre-\\ndients of bread, salt, and pepper. Make free, Sir,\\nsaid he I hope you like the chicken Pray make\\nwelcome, Sir, as the flowers in May.\\nThe Knight gets on cheerily, and nought at the feast\\ndoes he pass over, but makes himself merry, his mirth\\nincreased withal by the quaint humour of mine host.\\nThe farmer s basin of milk is no sooner emptied, than an\\nold serving man attends his master, with a silver pint of\\nstrong October, and places it in due form by his side. The\\nfarmer now takes with glee the second liquid dose, and\\nwhile drinking it, gaily indulges in the following inter-\\nlude\\nHe that would wish to live for ever,\\nMust wash the Milk from off his liver.\\nA bell now tingles for the venerable host, verging on a\\ncentury, after the good old fashion, sets and rises with the", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0166.jp2"}, "167": {"fulltext": "A SKETCH.\\n95\\nsun his men and maids are called to family prayer,\\nsimple yet suited to the purposes of their quiet, useful\\nlives. The farmer puts on his cap, and the Knight\\nretires to his room, for once surpassing himself, for he\\nnow passes a good night recals the incidents of his\\nprevious day s call the unostentatious manners of his\\nhospitable host, whose entertainment and good cheer\\nreminded Falstaff of times gone by; and, in a good\\nhumour waking, he as good-humouredly resolved to\\nplace this sketch in his Comic Annual as a fleeting\\nvision, or\\nA TAIL OF THE OLDEX TIME.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0167.jp2"}, "168": {"fulltext": "96\\nREASONS FOR DRINKING.\\nSaid Tom to Hal, I cannot think,\\nWhat has made you so fond of drink\\nWhenever I your windows pass,\\nI see a bottle and a glass\\nBesides, your very looks betray you,\\nAltho it is long since mid-day, you\\nSeem just risen from your bed,\\nYour eyes too starting from your head,\\nYou ll undermine your constitution\\nAnd bring on early dissolution.\\nSays Hal, Lord what a fuss you make,\\nBecause a bottle I can take", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0168.jp2"}, "169": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0169.jp2"}, "170": {"fulltext": "ONE OF THE SOCIETY OF FRIENDS MET TOGEIIIEK.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0170.jp2"}, "171": {"fulltext": "REASONS FOR DRINKING. 97\\nNo, No, said Tom tis not the bottle,\\nBut tis what you pour down your throttle.\\nHal shrugged his shoulders Well, he cried,\\nI do drink, that can t be denied\\nBut what I ask, am I the worse\\nI drain a bottle And your purse,\\nSaid Tom, For all things there s a season.\\nBut you I fear drink without reason.\\nNay, hold you there, cries Hal, I vow\\nYour reasoning I disallow\\nAnd I will straight give you a reason\\nFor every time, or place, or season.\\nFirst then no one can deny,\\nTis right to drink when we are dry,\\nTis one of Nature s rules and yet,\\nI always drink when I get wet\\nIn winter time, we re often told,\\nSome people drink because they re cold\\nIn summer time, the downright sot\\nWill drink all day because he s hot\\nTis usual in any weather,\\nFor friends to drink when met together\\nH", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0171.jp2"}, "172": {"fulltext": "98 REASONS FOR DRINKING.\\nAnd when the kindly tear is starting,\\nHow many take a cup at parting.\\nWhen friends drop in, an hour to pass,\\nWho d be a niggard with his glass\\nAnd if I go to see a friend,\\nDid I not drink, I should offend\\nWhen rolling in prosperity,\\nWe drink and sing right merrily\\nBut when adversity draws near,\\nWe drink to chase the starting tear\\nWhen in our veins the youthful blood\\nRolls like an overwhelming flood,\\nOur spirits running mountain high,\\nWe drain the sparkling goblet dry\\nBut when the blood begins to cool y\\nAnd we for life lay down a rule\\nAs in review our actions pass,\\nWe sigh and taste a sober glass.\\nHold! hold! enough! cried Tom, I see\\nMy arguments will useless be,\\nWhile you so well can make excuse,\\nAnd wit, and logic too produce.,", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0172.jp2"}, "173": {"fulltext": "REASONS FOR DRINKING.\\n99\\nGood bye one word before I go\\nI hope when you go clown below,\\nYou ll find Old Nick, that jolly fellow,\\nHas taken care to stock his cellar.\\nFRIE.VDS DROPPING IX FOR A DRIXKI.VG BOUT.\\nl.rfC\\nH 2", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0173.jp2"}, "174": {"fulltext": "100\\nWASHING A BLACK MAN WHITE.\\nTime out of mind it lias been deemed (in spite\\nOf all the efforts of ingenious man)\\nImpossible to wash a black man white,\\nAs incompatible with nature s plan.\\n1 know it has been said we live to learn\\n(Some folks can scarce learn how they are to live)\\nKnowledge is strength and oft twill serve our turn,\\nTo give advice when we ve nought else to give.\\nIn early life poor Mungo came from where\\nThe fairest girls are those most jetty black;\\nWhere heads with wool are crowned, and not with hair\\nWhere clothes are deemed a burthen to the back.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0174.jp2"}, "175": {"fulltext": "WASHING A BLACK MAN WHITE. 101\\nSome years he passed on board a man-of-war,\\nAnd then at Wapping wall he sat him down\\nThere he set up in trade a bachelor\u00e2\u0080\u0094\\nThe merriest barber in all London town.\\nYears rolled away, he led a merry life,\\nShaving and laughing on, he time beguiled\\nUntil one night alas a tailor s wife,\\nOh, tale of horror missed her only child.\\nThe mother screamed, the neighbours searched each lane\\nEach alley, court, and street did they explore,\\nAnd the last tidings which they could obtain,\\nWas, that it had been seen at Mungo s door.\\nA week passed by, the child was never found,\\nThe parents mourned their loss as parents should\\nWhen a strange rumour quickly spread around,\\nWhich almost curdled every hearer s blood.\\nTwas whispered that poor Mungo once was wild,\\nA cannibal on Afric s burning waste\\nAnd therefore rumoured that the luckless child\\nHad fall n a prey to his infernal taste.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0175.jp2"}, "176": {"fulltext": "102\\nWASHING A BLACK MAN WHITE.\\nThe sable sinner by the boys was hooted,\\nThe child was last seen standing by his door\\nMungo in vain their calumnies refuted,\\nThis damning proof he could not well get o er.\\nKuin d, undone, his business fled away,\\nHe soon found all his old resources fail\\nAnd not possessing wherewithal to pay\\nHis rent, had lodgings found him in a gaol.\\nAltho for debt he in a prison lay,\\nHis jovial spirits were not yet all quite quashed\\nHe drank, and smoked, and laughed six weeks away,\\nAnd then came out, a perfect black man white-washed!\\nBI3ING WHITE-WASHED.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0176.jp2"}, "177": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0177.jp2"}, "178": {"fulltext": "GIVING UP THE GHOST,", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0178.jp2"}, "179": {"fulltext": "103\\nGIVING UP THE GHOST.\\nSo at last I have caught you, my young master Hodge,\\nAnd now in the Bridewell this night shall you lodge\\nI ll teach you to frighten folks out of their wits,\\nBoys, women, and dandies, and babes, into fits\\nSir Richard will cause you to quiver and quake,\\nAnd much better use of your turnips to make.\\nWhat Ghost-Lanthorn scooping, you arch wicked wight,\\nYou ll find better scope for amusement to-night\\nYour Ghost you shall swallow your pale shrivelled cheek,\\nLooks as tho but one dinner you ate in a week\\nTo justice I ll bring you, and make it my boast,\\nOne sinner is made to give up his own Ghost", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0179.jp2"}, "180": {"fulltext": "104\\nHYPOCHONDRIASIS.\\nHy-po-chon-dri-a-sis is one of those unaccountable\\nwords, that learned men put into the mouths of the people,\\nwithout thinking whether they can ever get them out\\nagain a word not one in a hundred can pronounce, nor\\none in fifty understand, in one word, it menaces a\\nlock-jaw.\\nThere are two sorts of Hy-po-chon-dri-a-sis. One a\\nsort of melancholy madness, principally the lot of gentle-\\nmen in love I say gentlemen, because the ladies are\\ndeficient in the natural gravity and solemnity of disposition\\nnecessaiy to constitute a Hy-po-chon-dri-ac for when the\\nmodern Venus is in love, she thinks more of the Gretna\\nVulcan than sitting, like patience on a monument, smiling", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0180.jp2"}, "181": {"fulltext": "HYPOCHONDRIASIS. 105\\nat grief, and letting concealment like a worm V the\\nbud, feed on her damask cheek.\\nThe other, and most comical sort of Hy-po-chon-dri-acs,\\nare they who have a species of innate fear of the most\\nharmless things in existence some of these have a mx tal\\nand murderous antipathy to dogs others will run across\\nthe street and hide their diminished heads, to shun an\\nitinerant vender of old clothes. And others, who would\\nas soon commit suicide as go under a ladder or scaffold-\\ning but these latter more properly come under the class\\nof superstitious simpletons.\\nI myself have a mortal aversion to a Kite arising,\\nI believe, from some pranks, when my wits were in their\\nfirst stage, of one of those injudicious beings a Nurse-\\nmaid and which completely thrumbumbled my young\\nideas. To frighten me, a man-kite was placed at my\\nbedfoot and ever after, my midnight dreams and waking\\nthoughts were of Kites\\nOf the manner in which Hy-po-chon-dri-a-sis scatters\\none s ideas, the following is a specimen\\nWhen between the age of five and six, and when my\\nkite-mania had reached its height, I had an aunt, and\\ncertainly, both a great and good aunt: but nevertheless to", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0181.jp2"}, "182": {"fulltext": "106 HYPOCHONDRIASIS.\\nher I took an antipathy. First of all, her name was Kitelj\\nenough of itself to set my young heart in a flustration\\nhut added to this my said aunt s head was exceedingly\\nsmall, and her two shoulders unusually broad, and\\nwhether it was my heated imagination or not, I cannot\\nsay, hut I certainly thought her lower parts fast dwind-\\nling to their shortest span, declining gradually from the\\nshoulders to the heels she wore unusually large leg of\\nmutton sleeves, and also an immense Cashmere shawl\\ndouhled diagonally, which, suspended from the aforesaid\\nwide shoulders, gave to my aunt hehind, the exact image\\nof a Kite But this unfolds only half my misery, for\\ntherehy hangs a tale my aunt had eleven daughters the\\neldest fourteen the rest gradually decreasing in height,\\nuntil the little urchin of two years was almost lost in the\\ndistance. My aunt was a great lover of female decorum,\\nand had a very unique taste clothing all her daughters\\nin one colour white. My cousins, under the hands of the\\nDrill Serjeant, were all taught to walk holt upright, and\\nmy aunt chose that they should walk in a straight line\\ngradually progressing upwards from one to eleven. Fancy,\\ntherefore, the torture in my morning walks of this Woman-\\nKite and her tail, winding along in their early airing!", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0182.jp2"}, "183": {"fulltext": "HYPOCONDRIASIS.\\n107\\nThe nursemaid I never forgave, as the cause of my\\ndislike to one of the best of women one who would have\\ntaught me to soar, like Mr. Green the aeronaut, above the\\npetty disturbances of this world, but for the fear of dis-\\ngracing the line of my ancestry, by dying suspended from\\na string\\n5^3^^\\nMRS. KITELY.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0183.jp2"}, "184": {"fulltext": "108\\nTHE OLD MAIDS COMPLAINT.\\nAlas alack and well a day,\\nFolks cry when they complain,\\nMy days are ill, I well may say,\\nThey ne er will come again.\\nIts bitter tears repentance sheds,\\nFor lovers turned away\\nAnd now they turn away their heads,\\nAnd pass me ev ry day.\\nThe passion John and William nursed,\\nI treated with disdain\\nThey are avenged, I m doubly cursed,\\nYet single must remain.\\nI said that I was much too young,\\nAnd Roger was too bold\\nI wish I had cut out my tongue,\\nI fear I m now too old.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0184.jp2"}, "185": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0185.jp2"}, "186": {"fulltext": "iK^f*\\nBROTHERLY RECOGNITION.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0186.jp2"}, "187": {"fulltext": "THE OLD MAID S COMPLAINT. 109\\nYoung Hal could once my blushes raise,\\nAnd daily praise my charms\\nHad I a charm to gain his praise,\\nI d quit these vain alarms.\\nAlthough my name at seventeen\\nI might have changed away,\\nI fear I shall be ever-GREEN,\\nI know I ve long been grey.\\nThe duties of a wife I find,\\nSome ladies hate tis true\\nAh would that I were so confined,\\nAnd such ties were my due.\\nThey say we could not long survive,\\nDeprived of sun and air\\nHad I a son and heir alive,\\nWhy then I should not care.\\nThey tell me tis the old maid s fate\\nTo lead apes when below\\nBut men are monkies though tis late.\\nMight I not lead one now", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0187.jp2"}, "188": {"fulltext": "110 THE OLD MAID S COMPLAINT.\\nThey say that some folks live in dread\\nOf Jack Ketch and a halter;\\nBut were I to the altar led,\\nHe should not catch me falter.\\nThe victim of the prize ring dies,\\nAnd wives are widows made\\nA ring would make me what I prize,\\nA wife and not old maid.\\nHal said my cheeks were like the rose,\\nAnd that my eyes were blue,\\nBut now the red is in my nose,\\nAh me he knows tis true.\\nTis said, be pitied and be blest,\\nWith this I can t agree\\nGod knows the small-pox 1 detest,\\nFor that has pitted me.\\nLike pearls my teeth were white and clear,\\nThat symbol is not lost\\nTo me than pearls they re now more dear,\\nI know it to my cost.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0188.jp2"}, "189": {"fulltext": "THE OLD MAID S COMPLAINT. Ill\\nTo ruin all my charms are gone,\\nMy glass I look quite blue in\\nI ve one warm friend when most forlorn,\\nAnd that is dear blue ruin.\\nAh once I thought sweet twenty-one\\nI ne er should live to see\\nBut now too swift the minutes run,\\nI m almost fifty three\\nThen maidens all hear what I say,\\nBoth well mark and remark it\\nWhen you are young, and fair, and gay.\\nDon t overstand your Market.\\nA HAPPY COUPLE AT THE ALTAR.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0189.jp2"}, "190": {"fulltext": "112\\nA POT BOY\\nIn his vocation is no unimportant personage in this vast\\nmetropolis, from his calling, and being so much called for\\nin all societies, rich and poor, public and private. He is\\ninfluenced by his trade sometimes carrying good qualities,\\nand at other times bad. He possesses many good traits, for\\nhis trays are the medium of his business. His time is\\nspent in reconciling differences, a tally being his most\\npleasant employment, and in this department he beats all\\nother trades by chalks. He is a lover of order, and yet\\nmost cruelly puts all his pots on the rack. He frequently\\nbrings cordials to the afflicted but sometimes his pre-\\nsence is not so agreeable, that is when he brings\\nbitters. He is a sort of half and half gentleman,\\na jack of all trades, engaged in many and professing\\nnone he may be called a pleader, from his extensive bar\\npractice a conveyancer, for he draws and sometimes", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0190.jp2"}, "191": {"fulltext": "COME, TIP VELL, STOP A BIT.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0191.jp2"}, "192": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0192.jp2"}, "193": {"fulltext": "A POT BOY.\\n113\\nsettles the draught a musician, from his pipes a potter,\\nfrom his pots a porter, from what he carries an exe-\\ncutioner, for he is seen to knock off frothy heads with one\\nblow. And last of all, an undertaker from his fo er-trade.\\nBut like all who attempt more than they can manage,\\nhe is a hungler in all his trades, for whatever he takes in\\nhand he sends to pot.\\n\u00c2\u00abJ^s^*\\nDECAPITATION.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0193.jp2"}, "194": {"fulltext": "114\\nANAGRAMS,\\nWORDS REVOLUTIONIZED.\\nHow strange it is to play on words,\\nAnd turn them upside down;\\nFirst in and out, then round about,\\nLike music in a change of chords\\nTill they by changes grown,\\nAre without doubt, revers d throughout.\\nIn proof now let this anagram,\\nElucidate my point\\nGood people all, at Funeral,\\nTheir griefs and groans aloud proclaim\\nThe dismal word disjoint,\\nAnd real fun shall reverse it all.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0194.jp2"}, "195": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0195.jp2"}, "196": {"fulltext": "THE NATIONAL GUARD.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0196.jp2"}, "197": {"fulltext": "ANAGRAMS. 115\\nAgain another word is there,\\n(Which somewhat borders on the last)\\nSuppose deep Mourning just returning\\nBack from the grave, without a tear,\\nThen O grim nun thou hast,\\nThine eye discerning her heart s yearning.\\nOr fancy that through Golden Land,\\nYour footsteps you re pursuing\\nOld England there, thy sight will cheer,\\nThe Rock that makes its solid stand\\nGainst Revolution To love ruin\\nWill thus appear, that word of fear.\\nPoor France, so fam d for Gallantries,\\nThe source of all great sin\\nThy Punishment, to thine heart went\\nHarsh Word, wherein prophetic lies\\nNine thumps, as though twere cat o nine\\nTails,- furies sent to give them vent.\\nThy spirit, Democratical,\\nTo other lands has fled\\nIts level finds, in lowest minds,\\ni2", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0197.jp2"}, "198": {"fulltext": "116 ANAGRAMS.\\nO er Flanders now a comical\\nTrade its terror wide has spread,\\nBorne on the winds, by fonlest fiends.\\nA time there was, when Britain sought\\nA Radical reform,\\nThen, Peterloo was all the go\\nHer sons the rare mad frolic caught,\\nFor revolution warm\\nBut, Hunt Co., that would not do\\nLike Telegraphs, when prompt in action,\\nAre magistrates quick sighted\\nGreat Helps were they that fatal day\\nThey check d the raging faction,\\nAnd its fell spirit blighted,\\nResolved to stay the bloody fray.\\nTen Anagrams, on subjects grave,\\nDo here\\nAppear,\\nBrought under brief inspection\\nNow, to one more your ear I crave,", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0198.jp2"}, "199": {"fulltext": "ANAGRAMS. 117\\nTis Live\\nI give\\nTo anatomical dissection.\\nNot of grave but lively sound\\nInvert, convert it as you will.\\nIt appertains to evil still,\\nA lie in it will sure be found,\\nWhene er the word is broken\\nYet to the ear what is more vile,\\nWhat more the senses can beguile,\\nThan if the truth be spoken,\\nUnder a veil of flimsy texture\\nWhich makes the lie,\\nAt once, to vie,\\nAs sinister with dexter.\\nThe race of Led ran a race,\\nOf lie and vile deceit\\nLost to all grace, revilings base\\nBecame their cursed fate.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0199.jp2"}, "200": {"fulltext": "118 ANAGRAMS.\\nThus Live!\\n(I grieve\\nTo say,) dispose it as you will,\\nHas natural tendency to ill\\nReverse it quite, it evil is,\\nDivide it, then the half is this\\nEv the first moiety, tf, the last\\nCause and effect you here contrast,\\nCorrupted each, yet each reveal\\nEve, origin of ev ry ill,\\nPast, present, future; e en to die,\\nCurs d lot of all humanity\\nFor live, when preterperfect, evil\\nBecomes, transform d, a Devil\\nIll fated mould, wherein our fate is cast,\\nAt first, to live to lie in mould, at last.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0200.jp2"}, "201": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0201.jp2"}, "202": {"fulltext": "POACHING ON FORBIDDEN PRESERVES.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0202.jp2"}, "203": {"fulltext": "119\\nDEFINITE AND INDEFINITE ARTICLES.\\nSKETCH FROM A KITCHEN DRAWER.\\nThree aprons, two dusters, the face of a pig,\\nA dirty jack towel, a dishclout and wig\\nA foot of a stocking, three caps and a frill,\\nA busk and six buttons, mouse trap and a quill\\nA comb and a thimble, with Madona bands,\\nA box of specifics for chaps in the hands,\\nWith some mace and some cloves tied up in a rag,\\nAn empty thread-paper, and blue in a bag.\\nShort pieces of ribbon, both greasy and black,\\nA grater and nutmeg, the key of the jack\\nAn inch of wax candle, a steel and a flint,\\nA bundle of- matches, a parcel of mint.\\nA lump of old suet, a crimp for the paste,\\nA pair of red garters, a belt for the waist\\nA rusty bent skewer, a broken brass cock,\\nSome onions and tinder, and the draw r lock.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0203.jp2"}, "204": {"fulltext": "120 DEFINITE AND INDEFINITE ARTICLES.\\nA bag for the pudding, a whetstone and string,\\nA penny cross-bun, and a new curtain ring\\nA print for the butter, a ragged chemise,\\nTwo pieces of soap, and a thick slice of cheese.\\nFive tea-spoons of tin, a large lump of resin,\\nThe feet of a hare, and corks by the dozen.\\nThe whole duty of man, with some salve for the itch,\\nAnd a printed account of the Burning a witch.\\nA card to tell fortunes, a sponge and a can,\\nA pen without ink, and a small patty-pan\\nA rolling-pin pasted, and Common Pray r Book,\\nAre things which I found in the drawer of the Cook.\\nP- S. One last redeeming thing the Drawer had in t,\\nList, list, O list this list was there in print\\nA FOUL DRAWER.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0204.jp2"}, "205": {"fulltext": "121\\nTHE\\nLAMENTATION OF OLD LONDON BRIDGE.\\nWhat strange events and changes have I seen\\nOf Men and Manners faces too, and things,\\nSince I across the Thames a bridge have been.\\nI have beheld in my time many Kings\\nNear me, too, have I seen a forest green,\\nWhose only trace is, what the poet sings\\nWhere once the natives used to hunt the boar,\\nAnd hungry wolves were also deemed a bore.\\nBut now, good Lord how changed do things appear,\\nTo chimney pots are turned the lofty trees\\nNo more wild beasts are howling in mine ear,\\nBut swearing men disturb my reveries\\nTheir ribald jesting daily do I hear\\nIn shouts of laughter floating on the breeze,", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0205.jp2"}, "206": {"fulltext": "122 THE LAMENTATION OF OLD LONDON BRIPG-E.\\nFrom out trie windows of trie neighboring alehouse,\\nWhere groups sit looking like Death on the Pale-horse.\\nTis now almost a thousand years ago\\nSince I first stretch d my arches o er the river\\nAnd tho it must be own d I m getting low\\nIn estimation scarcely worth a stiver,\\nDisasters I have met with, which, I know\\nWould have made many a frailer fabric quiver,\\nAnd quake with fear perhaps give up the Ghost\\nBut I have too much modesty to boast.\\nI was not always such as now you see,\\nChapels and Towers once adorned my prime\\nProcessions, and gay feats of chivalry\\nAnd Nonesuch House, the pride of olden time\\nNone such you d find within some miles of me.\\nOh those were happy days the greatest crime\\nA man could then commit, was to be sad,\\nWhen ev ry heart was warm, and free, and glad.\\nHow often on a lovely summer s night\\nWhen all was hushed, except the shouts of mirth,\\nHave I beheld Prince Hal s most valiant Knight\\nSir John FalstarT\u00e2\u0080\u0094 that monstrous lump of earth,", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0206.jp2"}, "207": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0207.jp2"}, "208": {"fulltext": "BREAKING DOWN THE BRIDGE OF AN ENEMY.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0208.jp2"}, "209": {"fulltext": "THE LAMENTATION OF OLD LONDON BRIDGE. 123\\nTrudge reeling on. He was a merry wight,\\nAnd loved sack-posset even from his birth.\\nHard by, he often drank all night, tis said,\\nIn Eastcheap, at the well-known Old Boar s Head.\\nOh I have gazed on feats of archery\\nWhen English Yeomen shot the long cloth yard\\nSwift thro the air the feathered bolt would fly,\\nAnd nought its rapid progress could retard\\nBut now each arch I have is quite awry\\nIn vain I gaze aloft tis monstrous hard\\nFor where I used to see the swift winged arrow\\nI only spy a crow, perchance a sparrow.\\nBut since those Halcyon days, I ve suffered much\\nI ve nearly been destroyed by fire or flood,\\nSix times the plague has given me a touch\\nMy streets and walls have been besmeared with blood.\\nAnd if you doubt me, history can vouch\\nThe truth of what I say. Yet have I stood\\nMy ground against th accumulating evils,\\nAlthough they plagued me like ten thousand devils.\\nPerhaps you ll say that it is a bad trait, or\\nSomething worse, because I ve borne the head", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0209.jp2"}, "210": {"fulltext": "124 THE LAMENTATION OF OLD LONDON BRIDGE.\\nOf many a brave man upon my gate, or\\nTurret top when he could not eat no bread\\nFor in those days, if once they caught a traitor,\\nThey did nt bury him when he was dead.\\nWitness Earl Desmond, Bolingbroke, and Wallace;\\nI m glad they ve now abolished all such follies.\\nBut now my back is broken in two places,\\nMy wooden piers are rotten what of that\\nTime every day my shattered form defaces,\\nAnd I, alas! am getting quite a flat;\\nI am propped up, and very hard my case is;\\nOf sterling value, too, I dare not chat.\\nYet why should I shrink thus in sad confusion,\\nIs mine the only rotten constitution\\nt\\nSurely I am not yet become so hideous,\\nAs that bridge which most people call the devil s\\nIt can t be said that I am as insidious\\nAs the arch-fiend, and sovereign prince of evils\\nI spurn the charge as cruel and invidious,\\nThe hellish fiend alone in horror revels\\nYet some poor devils have I robb d of breath,\\nAnd thoughtlessly consigned to sudden death.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0210.jp2"}, "211": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0211.jp2"}, "212": {"fulltext": "A GENERAL PANIC, AND RUN UPON TIIF. BANKS.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0212.jp2"}, "213": {"fulltext": "THE LAMENTATION OF OLD LONDON BRIDGE. 125\\nMy enemies allege, too, that I swear,\\nAnd daily dam-n the river, up and down\\nGod knows that swearing I could never bear\\nAltho they say that I am cold as stone,\\nTis nothing but the heart of oak I wear,\\nSustains the weight I ve borne so long alone.\\nBut I have lately seen the river dammed,\\nTwo-thirds across and then with stones well crammed\\nA rival, too, has sprung up by my side,\\nAnd stares me out of countenance. I know\\nI long have stood the brunt of time and tide,\\nAnd now must soon expect the final blow,\\nWhich I may call the death blow of my pride\\nYet when I m gone, both time and tide will flow\\nAs now they do and tho fate onward stalks,\\nMy gaudy rival I can beat by chalks.\\nAh, once indeed old father Thames s banks,\\nSupported me in my extremities,\\nAnd gladly I repaid him with my thanks\\nOn him no sudden panic dared to seize.\\nNow Jolliffe s partner, one Sir Edward Banks,\\nMy fast approaching ruin gladly sees,", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0213.jp2"}, "214": {"fulltext": "126 THE LAMENTATION OF OLD LONDON BRIDGE.\\nAnd like a vampire daily near me lingers\\nI hope cold stones will some day burn his fingers.\\nSome bridges now, like thieves, are hung in chains\\nSuspension bridges keep me in suspense\\n1 dream of smiths and hammers, for the pains\\nOf Hammer-smith bridge, must have been immense\\nBut for myself, I know that my poor brains,\\nCould never bear a heat half so intense.\\nAnd I shall soon lie low beneath the feet\\nOf thousands when I pave some dirty street.\\nA SUSPENSION BRIDGE ACROSS THE STYX.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0214.jp2"}, "215": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0215.jp2"}, "216": {"fulltext": "r\\nTHE DRAMA.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0216.jp2"}, "217": {"fulltext": "127\\nTRAGIC REMINISCENCES.\\nMy father was a slaughterman thriving in a small\\ncountry village, for, although a religious place, the\\ninhabitants concurred in patronizing his propensity for\\nbutchering. To this fact do I ascribe the tragical\\nturn of my thoughts, although it was said I imbibed\\nit with my mother s milk, for she, like a good help-\\nmate, helped her husband in his cruel trade be that\\nas it may, I certainly had a most sanguinary turn\\nof mind a fight would excite my admiration most\\nimsoph ideally, and when very young, I could recite,\\nand with glee, the whole of the part of Hotspur, who,\\nKilled some six or seven dozen at a breakfast,\\nand that with all the emphasis and twang attached by\\nschool-boys to the productions of our immort/e bard.\\nIn due time I was installed into my father s business,\\nand became quite as cruel as my progenitors but still", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0217.jp2"}, "218": {"fulltext": "128 TRAGIC REMINISCENCES.\\nretaining my dramatic propensities, I was at the head\\nof a corps of privateers, who, like myself, did justice to\\ntheir profession by murdering all within their reach.\\nMy first appearance in public being at the time of an\\nelection, I expected to make a hit, but had not been on\\nthe stage many minutes, when I was assailed with a\\nvolley of missiles, rotten eggs, oranges, c, which made\\nmore hits than I liked I was therefore obliged to make\\na speedy exit, so much did they make their eggs-hit.\\nThis so put me out of countenance (my face bearing\\npalpable marks both of hard and soft usage) that I deter-\\nmined to make myself scarce, and did not forget to make\\nmy father s money scarce also, the possession of which\\nso elevated my spirits, (God knows I ought to have\\nbeen elevated elsewhere), that I never thought of the\\nfuture, but made my way to the first strolling company\\nwhere by dint of a few presents to the understrappers,\\nI soon got a character for wealth (though I lost my\\ncharacter in getting it) among these poor actors,\\npoor in every sense of the word. My next public\\nappearance was under better auspices, and I came\\noff with eclat, although some of my companions\\nthought it was only so-so but I told them I expected to\\nreap advantage from spending my time in their company.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0218.jp2"}, "219": {"fulltext": "TRAGIC REMINISCENCES. 129\\nI will pass over my minus transactions in the country,\\nand minor theatrical exploits in town, to the time\\nwhen, thinking myself at the top of the tree, I wished\\nto gather some of the fruit of my labour. I was en-\\ngaged at Drur y Lane Theatre at a good salary and\\nlived like a prince, until my vanity led me to think I\\ncould take up first rate parts, and bring down such\\ntorrents of applause as were nightly showered on the\\nreigning favourites. The night came, and I entered\\nas Richard III. in all my kingly state, panting for\\napplause, the audience for their Christmas pantomime,\\nnor did they wish my tragic thoughts to interrupt\\ntheir merry ones added to which my bad qualities,\\nhitherto in the back ground, appeared more forcibly,\\nwhen rubbed up to suit my present advancement\\non the stage of life. In fact, both actor and audience\\nwere quite characteristic of the character I represented,\\nand I was, (to use a Thespian term) damned!\\nThe dress and upper circles I could have boxed in the\\nbest Tom Spring style the pit I wished a hundred\\ntimes in the bottomless one, and the gods above so put\\nmy gall awry, that I made a foolish speech, forfeited\\nmy engagement, and went adrift like a stray boat,\\nwithout a name, a prey to the first bum (or water)\\nbailiff for I had not forgotten to run in debt. for", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0219.jp2"}, "220": {"fulltext": "130 TRAGIC REMINISCENCES.\\nwhich in the long run I was indebted to my short\\nrun of prosperity. I applied in vain at the minors;\\nand after being shifted from one scene of misery to\\nanother, I was at length appointed scene-shifter in\\nClark s Theatricals; but one night making shift to\\nintrude a wood scene into a parlour, I was dismissed\\nand left to shift for myself.\\nI now began to have serious thoughts of returning,\\nlike the prodigal son, to my father, but, finding he was\\na bankrupt, I disliked the idea of being called to\\naccount for the money I had so unaccountably ab-\\nstracted. I was at length obliged to enter upon a\\nnew scene, and act the part of candle-snvffer at a\\ncountry playhouse, where in despite of slanderers and\\nbackbiters, I hope to remain in that performance, till\\ndeath puts his extinguisher on my vital spark.\\nA BACKBITEtt.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0220.jp2"}, "221": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0221.jp2"}, "222": {"fulltext": "-^-^^oc?\\nscf^\\nA DETACHMENT.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0222.jp2"}, "223": {"fulltext": "131\\nWARS ALARMS.\\n*Nor young Attornies have the rage withstood,\\nBut changed their Pens for muskets Ink for blood,\\nAnd (strange reverse) will die for Britain s good.\\nTime speeds it may be thirty years,\\nSince Englishmen turned volunteers\\nIn ev ry county\u00e2\u0080\u0094 ev ry city,\\nTo stop the march of French banditti,\\nWho did to Gallia s shores repair,\\nAs mad as any young March hare\\nWith threat to force a passage over,\\nAnd taste of English fare at Dover\\nTho sharp the threat, yet slow the motion.\\nWith their flat-bottoms, cross the ocean\\nThe British fair all in a bustle,\\nAverse with foreign arms to tussle,\\nTurn d their behind upon the foe,\\nAnd took to light fantastic toe.\\nk2", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0223.jp2"}, "224": {"fulltext": "132 war s alarms.\\nNot so their lords (of the creation\\nLords) volunteers to guard the nation\\nTo arms they took, (not to their heel)\\nTo put their bayonets of steel\\nIn Gallia s heart their heels upon her\\nFlimsy flat-bottom d seat of honor.\\nAnd now to our heroic tale\\nTwas at that ancient city L\\nAll loyal, brave, and independent,\\nAs in her civic pomp resplendent\\nHer volunteers by B. be-headed,\\nA colonel whom the foe ne er dreaded,\\n(They saw but little to be brief,\\nOf their commander, as their Chief,\\nThe foe, still less of his external,\\nKnew nothing therefore of the Kernel)\\nWere, just about the period stated,\\nFrom local circumstance, ill-fated\\nTo hear the drum that warlike token,\\nAnd have their midnight slumbers broken\\nThe time was late the scene the course.;*\\nThen race of riot late of horse,\\nA ??ioo?ilight scene of madmen s fury\\nBut, gentle reader, hear my story.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0224.jp2"}, "225": {"fulltext": "war s alarms. 133\\nHark hark the sound of war s alarms,\\nSee bravest soldiers fall to arms\\nFrom bed our volunteers arise,\\nEach shaking slumber from his eyes,\\nPuts on his clothes, and takes his gun\\nTheir wives run forth to see the fun\\nThe Minster Green the ground of muster,\\nSoon here and there presents a cluster.\\nBelow the u hill a part assemble,\\nWhile others on their pillows tremble\\nMore faithful to the nuptial bed,\\nWith sheets and blankets over head\\nFirst, hug their wives with tight embrace,\\nThen pray to heaven to grant them grace.\\nThe Colonel from the festive board,\\nNow staggers forth, without his sword\\nWho all the warmth of zeal displays,\\nTo suffocate the spreading blaze.\\nThis gallant Colonel of the Corps,\\nWho never went to war before\\nTho but half cock d to meet the foe,\\nNow hoped for one decisive blow\\nCalled for his horse, but call d in vain,\\nAnd could not even find his men", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0225.jp2"}, "226": {"fulltext": "134 war s alarms,\\nForsaken by his able force,\\nWhom zeal had hastened to the course\\nThe commandant was losing ground,\\nWhen on such warlike duty bound\\nHalf mad, and half intoxicated,\\nWith courage high, and crest elated.\\nThe Captain of the Horse, he begs\\nTo take him up, to save his legs\\nThe Captain of the Horse declined\\nTo lift the Colonel up behind\\nYet one less fearful of the trouble,\\nDeclared his horse would carry double.\\nAnd hoped the Colonel would not fail\\nTo hold on by the horse s tail.\\nContented in this way to ride,\\nThe military chief complied\\nNo sooner had he gained a seat,\\nThan in the air the charger s feet\\nWith very rapid motion rose,\\nAnd pitch d the Colonel on his nose\\nBut having now resumed his place,\\nWith ardour glowing in his face,\\nGo on he cries, with speed pursue\\nThe lawless gang, the bloody crew,", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0226.jp2"}, "227": {"fulltext": "WAR S ALARMS.\\n135\\nAnd let them all be pris ners taken,\\nLet none, if guilty, be forsaken.\\nThe Colonel, thus, unto the course\\nProceeded upon double horse\\nBut ere he reached the place of riot,\\nThe parties in the cause were quiet.\\n3Sj _ mS\\nA DIS-CHARGER.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0227.jp2"}, "228": {"fulltext": "136\\nTHE SUTTEE.\\nOh who can tell how hard it is to climb\\nThe steep ascent\\nBeattie.\\nMy heart was oft disposed to melt\\nAnd for those little urchins felt,\\nWho pass their days\\nIn climbing up the steep ascent,\\nWhich Beattie says is hard he meant,\\nNo doubt, to praise\\nTheir steep ascending cap-abilities\\nBut I suspect that much of tears and weeping\\nAttends the study of Black Arts so sweeping,\\nEre thro the chimney pots their caps are peeping,\\nHowe er ascending may be their abilities.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0228.jp2"}, "229": {"fulltext": "THE BLACK ARTS.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0229.jp2"}, "230": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0230.jp2"}, "231": {"fulltext": "THE SUTTEE. 137\\nIndeed, I always thought it was a stigma\\nUpon our very Philanthropic Nation,\\nThat no one could unravel the enigma,\\nWhich would absolve us from this degradation\\nConverting little English hearts of oak\\nInto black dwarfs, and soot-ties of the East\\nWhen some soot-able means would break the yoke,\\nIf able to sweep out the soot at least,\\nTwould be the means by which it might be broke.\\nOur kitchen chimney very often smoked,\\nAnd made a smother,\\nSmoth ring the maid my wife was much provoked,\\nAnd made a bother,\\nSaying it never was half swept and that\\nThe little sweep, no larger than a sprat,\\nKept growing smaller every time he came.\\nFor that, I said, the boy was not to blame\\nIf thus to argue gainst the sweep, she meant,\\nIt really was a sweeping argument.\\nThis passed off with a smile,\\nAnd when the smile had passed,\\nI thought a little while,\\nUntil I hit at last", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0231.jp2"}, "232": {"fulltext": "138 THE SUTTEE.\\nOn a plan\\nWhich I resolved to put in execution\\nAlso to execute my resolution\\nLike a man,\\nAnd save the little boys from further persecution.\\nOne morning early, I awoke,\\nJust as the dapple dawn bespoke\\nThe dawn of dapper day\\nAnd gently I raised up my head,\\nAs gently then slid out of bed,\\nA sweeping part to play.\\nMy blunderbuss I loaded for the work,\\nAnd crept down stairs quite softly all was dark\\nAs pitch, in\\nThe kitchen.\\nThen to the fire-place having found my way,\\nRested my fire-arms upright on the grate,\\nAnd pulled the trigger. What was* my dismay,\\nTo hear it followed by a crash, so great,\\nI thought I d blundered with my blunderbuss,\\nAnd by mistake had fired through the window,\\nReducing all the panes of glass, to tinder\\nPerhaps twas lucky if it was no worse.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0232.jp2"}, "233": {"fulltext": "THE SUTTEE 139\\nA moment s reflection\\nBrought to my recollection,\\nThat my next neighbour, had a kind of closet\\nBuilt close against the chimney of my kitchen it\\nWas where he used his china to deposit,\\nAnd I had dished each cup and plate and dish in it.\\nLuckily for me, he laid the blame,\\n(When he saw how his china cups had flown up.)\\nOn other shoulders I heard him exclaim\\nThe Powder Mills at Hounslow have been blown up. r\\nI stole up stairs, but little did I dream\\nMy wife was then awake, and mischief brewing\\nAs I drew near, she gave a fearful scream,\\nThen cried, My God! why what have youbcen doing? 1\\nI happened to pass,\\nThe toilette glass,\\nAnd turning my head on one side for a minute.\\nStarted, to see the form reflected in it\\nI was indeed from head to foot\\nA monstrous moving mass of soot\\nIn short, a full sized grown up Suttee,\\nNo chimney sweep could be more smutty\\nLike a Hindoo, I thrice performed ablution,\\nBut not so soon did I get ab-so-lution", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0233.jp2"}, "234": {"fulltext": "140\\nTHE SUTTEE.\\nMy wife at home reigned ab-solute\\nAnd as my sable deeds of soot,\\nRequired a suit-able amende (excuse tautology),\\nI was obliged to make a soot-able apology.\\nTHE BLACK DWARF.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0234.jp2"}, "235": {"fulltext": "141\\nTO\\nA CHAMBER CANDLESTICK.\\nQ ^fragment.\\nThe Hamlet is still\\nTo bed, or not to bed that is the question\\nWhether by silvery moon, or shining lamp,\\nOr mould, or wax, or by umbrageous rush,\\nAnd with the one or other make our stand\\nTo bed and by a sleep to say we lull\\nThe headache, and such other natural paiii^\\nAs Life is prone to. Tis a visitation\\nAt midnight to be wished: so then, to bed\\nIf by the broad, yet borrowed silv ry light\\nOf yon pale moon, we have no need to snvff-hers\\nIf by the smaller light of modest oil,\\nNo need should we have to pxtinyuish-HER", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0235.jp2"}, "236": {"fulltext": "142\\nTO A CHAMBER CANDLESTICK.\\nTo sleep! and then to wake Aye, there s the rub,\\nWhen we have shuffled off our midnight cap\\nTo give us ease there s the relief,\\nFrom the cap-tivity of a long night\\nNow, thro the half-closed shutter, dart\\nThe golden beams of Sol, the silver moon\\nAnd shining lamp eclipsed the wick of oil,\\nOr rush, or wax, or tallow candle, now\\nHide to the day-light their diminished heads,\\nAnd nothing but a bare stick leave behind.\\nBARE POLLS.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0236.jp2"}, "237": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0237.jp2"}, "238": {"fulltext": "HYDROPHOBIA.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0238.jp2"}, "239": {"fulltext": "143\\nON DOG DAYS.\\nFrom the commencement of July, to the middle of\\nAugust, our good people of England are in a complete\\nstate of fear, ferment, and fomentation. Hydrophobia\\nBile-stirring word thou shouldst be classed among the\\nvery patron saints of cruelty, oppression, and dog-mati-\\ncalness. Alas what inhuman murders are committed\\nunder thy auspices, upon the unmuzzled unfortunates,\\nwho, happening to cross a street with their tails crossed\\nbetween their legs, or with a cast in their eye, and\\nlooking cross, are no sooner espied than cast in a die,\\nand by poison, pistol, or pitchfork, murdered, or starved\\nwithout meet and proper grace. The mad dog mania is\\na sort of epidemic, which periodically oc-curs in the\\nmonths, when of all others the good people go dog-gedly\\nto work and when, their thirst being excited, they are\\nthe more blood-thirst}", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0239.jp2"}, "240": {"fulltext": "144 ON DOG DAYS.\\nThe name of a mad dog is enough to start any judge\\nfrom the bench, or jurymen from their box, without\\ntrying the cause even the apple women run from their\\nstalls, and, like the heathen goddess, Ceres, scatter the\\nfruits of the earth. If a constable wishes to clear a\\nstreet of a crowd, he has but to utter the mad dog cry,\\nand it operates like a fever mixture raises a com-\\nmotion, and sets all the people running like chaff before\\nthe wind.\\nMany of the canine victims to Mansion-house tyranny\\nhaving declared in their dying moments, that the irritation\\nof their minds proceeded partly from the docking of their\\ntails, and their privileges by the New Polic-y, a sub-\\nscription was entered into for supplying the dear creatures\\nwith cigars, as being the first privilege of puppy-ism.\\nIt was also advised to prevent the runaways from going\\nabroad, to clap them in the Fleet prison but a worthy\\nalderman remembered that, in a recent case, the clerk\\nof the court would not discharge a prisoner without\\nfirst paying his fees, and in that case, the measure\\nproposed would cause a burthen on the corporation,\\nparts of which were already too heavy to bear them-\\nselves.\\nThe dog days, however, like all other things, have", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0240.jp2"}, "241": {"fulltext": "ON DOG DAYS. 145\\nchanged, and more fortunately for the cause of humanity,\\nand the peace of mind of both dogs and men, the dog\\ndays of 1830 would have been more appropriately called\\nthe cat and dog days, for, with all due submission to the\\nreign of St. Swithin, we have been literally pelted with\\ncats, dogs, and pitchforks even the legislature itself adds\\nto our misfortunes, for, now the New Beer Act is in\\nfull force, we are (forcibly speaking) act-ually inundated\\nwith heavy wet.\\nIn former times the good cits might be caught tripping\\nin their Sunday trips, to Richmond, Hornsey, and the\\nother cockney paradises nay, could even now and then\\nindulge in a little Eel-piety but now, alas lasses, lads,\\nand other ducks get most unmercifully ducked Rich-\\nmond is but a poor retreat, Hornsey a sea of mud: house-\\nmaids are made to stay at home, cooks dare not stir out\\nfor fear of drippings, muzzles are changed for mizzles\\nin short, as some say, the world is turned upside down,\\nsome unseen sea has overflown and flown over our heads,\\nthus making the whole of our cloudy nation, so nation\\ncloudy.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0241.jp2"}, "242": {"fulltext": "146\\nTHE ODD SHELTER.\\nBy the reign of St. S within it pours,\\nCats and dogs my pathway beset\\nI could fancy it was by the pow rs,\\nSt. Swi thin s delight, heavy wet\\nIt s a very odd shelter I ll get,\\nFaith and troth I ll be wet by the pores\\nFor the clouds are beginning to let\\nOut biggest of beautiful showers.\\nThat I am my father s own lad,\\nI feel every day I get older\\nAn odd man in his way was my dad,\\nYou see I m his son by my shoulder", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0242.jp2"}, "243": {"fulltext": "TIJL ODD ill! J/l in.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0243.jp2"}, "244": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0244.jp2"}, "245": {"fulltext": "147\\nLIFE IN PHILADELPHIA.\\nIs Miss Dinah at home Yes, Sir, but she petickly ingaged\\nin washing de dishes. Ah I am sorry I can t hab de honour to\\npay my devours to her give her my card.\\nl2", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0245.jp2"}, "246": {"fulltext": "148\\nLIFE IN PHILADELPHIA.\\nI entered a four-horse stage at the Bank, to dine\\nwith an old friend at Muswell-Hill. Two gentlemen,\\none with a thin pale visage and slender figure, the other\\na rosy-cheek Bacchus, were my fellow passengers. At\\nIslington we took up a fourth, whose amiable good-natured\\nface evinced a heart at peace with itself and the whole\\nworld. Ah Mr. Tomson, says Bacchus, what has\\ndrawn you from your rural cot to the city Why,\\nreplied the former, nothing less than the abolition\\nof the Slave Trade I have this day smoothed the\\nonly wrinkle in my pillow, by signing a petition to\\nthe Commons, to abolish the diabolical traffic in human\\nbeings, making them, like brute beasts, the objects of\\nbargain and sale. Lord bless you says Bacchus,\\nthese here negroes knows nothing about liberty or\\nslavery! for a glass of real Jamaica they would sell", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0246.jp2"}, "247": {"fulltext": "LIFE IN PHILADELPHIA. 149\\nthemselves! Oh! rejoined Mr. Tomson, my amiable\\nfriend, for by this time my heart claimed him by that appel-\\nlation, only think how dreadful it is for a husband and\\nfather to be severed from his wife and children and sold to\\nstrangers all of them dispersed into foreign countries\\nall ties of relationship broken, and each, deprived of\\nprecious liberty, become like cattle, the property of a\\nmaster. Liberty, ejaculated Bacchus, is truly a\\nfavorite topic of mine, and I would die in the cause. I\\nhave kept a coffee-house, on Cornhill, for these fifty\\nyears have been for half a century my own master\\ncould go and come, and do what I please, and yet,\\nduring that long period, have not exceeded one mile from\\nthe Bank nor should I now, had not my best customer,\\nMr. Jenkins of Mus well-Hill, pressed me into this trip\\nto taste his old rack punch. The thin gentleman re-\\nmarked, that he also had been an enthusiast in the cause of\\nliberty, had sought her in every clime, and once on the\\nwild plains of Mexico, had caught a glimpse of her blue\\nmantle but when on the point of embracing the blue-\\neyed maid, had received a volley from a file of citizens,\\nhid in ambuscade to arrest his progress. Liberty,\\nsaid he, dwells only in the mind, regulated by a just\\nobservance of the laws and circumstances that surround", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0247.jp2"}, "248": {"fulltext": "150 LIFE IN PHILADELPHIA.\\nit. Liberty, gentlemen, may be as generally found with\\nthe Negroes in the plantations of our West India colo-\\nnies, as amongst ourselves. Slavery may enchain the\\nbody, but cannot control the mind. Look in our parks,\\nand behold the splendid equipages pass to our balls,\\nrouts, and concerts, and you will find more absolute\\nslavery than is known or felt amongst the negroes. Let\\na man, by a sudden turn of fortune, acquire a few thou-\\nsand pounds he will instantly load himself with the\\nfetters of carriage, horses, and servants. Human nature\\nis everywhere the same. I once manumitted fourteen\\nslaves of both sexes, and sent them to New York, each\\nwith a sufficient fund for an outfit and I was curious\\nto know, after the lapse of a few years, the result of my\\nexperiment.\\nMy first enquiry was after my fair favourite, Dinah, a\\ngirl who, having regained her freedom, possessed such a\\nhumble cast of spirit that she still felt the cellar to be\\nher appropriate station, and therefore had no thought of\\naspiring above it, until excited by the more soaring mind\\nof Sancho, who had been my own personal domestic, and\\ntherefore ventured to ape his master in the upper story.\\nMr. Sancho had acquired a love for the Bell Letters,\\nand had long been in, correspondence with Miss Dinah.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0248.jp2"}, "249": {"fulltext": "LIFE IN PHILADELPHIA.\\n151\\nHab you a few quires of letter-paper, of the very best\\nrate, for a gemman to write hi 6 -letters on\\nYes how many will you have\\n1 spose my stay at de spring may be boat two or tree\\nweek; give me nough quire to write four letter\\nI found Mr. Sancho, for the first time, with the\\nhabit of a gentleman, paying his personal suit to Miss\\nDinah. He had contrived to instil drops of vanity into\\nher heart, having first loaded her empty head with\\nlumps of self-conceit. She was, as might be naturally\\nexpected, shewing off, with a huge hat and feathers\\nin gaudiest trim. Little did Sancho dream that his\\nflattery would produce in her such speedy symptoms\\nof gay flirtation. Another Romeo now urged his claim", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0249.jp2"}, "250": {"fulltext": "152\\nLIFE IN PHILADELPHIA.\\nto the honour of gallanting her to the battery, and to\\nthis fair Juliet may be traced one of the much talked\\nof rejected addresses. Sancho, Dinah, and Romeo\\nwere alike distinguished by the predominant colours,\\nas well as preposterous cut, of their dresses, viz.\u00e2\u0080\u0094\\nSancho. Cravat, blue; waistcoat, pink coat, black;\\nhat, white inexpressibles, yellow.\\nDinah. Feather, pink; hat, yellow; dress, red;\\ntrimmings, yellow.\\nRomeo. Hat, black; cravat, pink; coat, sky-blue;\\npantaloons, yellow, black stripes eye-glass ribbon, pink.\\nSancho was in the act of addressing Dinah thus\\n4 Shall I hah de honour of glanting you to de battery,\\nthis afternoon, Miss Dinah hope you ll squeze de brupt", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0250.jp2"}, "251": {"fulltext": "LIFE IN PHILADELPHIA.\\n153\\ninbitation, as to which the fair Dinah, interrupting\\nhim, replied\\n0, you already sqwzed, Mr. Sancho, only I made\\na privyous gagement to Mr. Romio, but Romeo, tor-\\ntured by long suspense and suffering, with hope and\\nfear alternate, now interposed Hope you not going\\nto break your gagement to me. I hah been standing\\nhere for tree hours.\\nI afterwards met with Caesar, a mercurial sharp boy\\nhe was in company with Florinda, a Negress, both also\\narrayed in all the fashionable finery of the haut ton.\\nSays Caesar, How you like de new fashion shirt, Miss\\nFlorinda? Florinda, with an air which would have\\ngraced the highest circles, replied, I tink dey mighty", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0251.jp2"}, "252": {"fulltext": "154 LIFE IN PHILADELPHIA.\\nelegum I see you on New-year-day, when you carry\\nde colour in de Abolition Siety you look jist like Pluto,\\nde God of War!\\nThis mimic scene could only be equalled by an oc-\\ncurrence which took place at the Colosseum yesterday,\\nwhere, standing by a fat frowsy woman who was gazing\\nat the panoramic view of London, covered with a huge\\nbonnet and ribbands of all colours, named and un-named\\nby Newton, and sweating under a load of ebon curls, I\\nheard her say to her daughter, who had a face resembling\\na bull dog, Clara, my dear, do you see your father s\\nproperties Oh yes, replied Clara, and Fleet\\nDitch, and Mutton Hill, and Sal Saunders sifting dust.\\nDo, Bobby, my darling, growled the mother, c run\\ndown and call the carriage, for these here people smells\\nso strong of musk and lavender, that I am faint for\\nwant of a drop of something. It is always the case with\\nme, when I gets amongst the wulgur classes. I say, Sir,\\nthat neither Caesar, Florinda, nor Mrs. Muck the dustman s\\nwife, were in their proper sphere. The former were useful\\nbeings on the plantations the latter on the dust-hill.\\nBut to proceed Having left Caesar and Miss Florinda,\\nmy attention was caught by a rencontre between a thick-\\nheaded thick-lipped black, and a printer s devil, crying", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0252.jp2"}, "253": {"fulltext": "LIFE IN PHILADELPHIA,\\n155\\nHurrah hurrah for General Jackson\\nThe adult Negro, with a shilela began to beat Mer-\\ncury s footman, with the following remonstrance What\\nde debit you hurrah for General Jackson for you black\\nnigger I larn you better. I m a ministration man\\nIs this, said I to myself, the use or abuse of liberty\\nand pondering on the ridiculousness of my attempt to\\nmake human beings happy, I could not avoid bringing\\nbefore my view some of those exhilarating productions,\\nwhich the chiefs of every age have employed to\\nanimate their annies. One struggle more, says one\\nGeneral, and you will give to unborn generations that\\nfreedom you enjoy. Be patient be obedient pass but\\nyon chain of mountains, and the splendour of your arms", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0253.jp2"}, "254": {"fulltext": "156 LIFE IN PHILADELPHIA.\\nwill ensure to you victory. The army was patient and\\nobedient, the mountains were passed, the victory was\\nwon, but the conquerors were left to perish in the\\ndesert.\\nHaving a call to make upon General Johnstone, who\\nheld the office of a Police Magistrate, I was introduced\\nto him on the bench, where I found him engaged in\\ndeciding between three others of my manumitted negroes,\\nwho had committed themselves in a love affair and I\\ncannot better describe the matter, than give a copy of the\\nnotes taken on the occasion by the gallant general and\\nlearned judge, whose private occupation was that of a\\nblacksmith.\\nMy name is Antonio Ceasa de Wilson. I kab been", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0254.jp2"}, "255": {"fulltext": "LIFE IN PHILADELPHIA. 157\\npaying a visit to Miss Araminta Arabella Tomson, in de\\noyster cellar, where she live when Massa Sambo come\\nin and say, You hab no business here. So I look at\\nMiss Minta, and she say I hab, and this gentleman and\\nme hab a tussle. The handkerchief is not his, but one\\nMiss Minta made present of to me.\\n1 I can assure you, exclaims the sooty rival, that\\nMiss Araminta did give me de witching glance, which\\ntold me as plain as eye could speak, that I was de more\\nwelcome visiter and as to de handkerchief, it is Miss\\nMinta s and I have a better right to it than that other\\ngentleman, as I have presented to her a scissar, a timble,\\nand a lock of my hair.\\nThis mock farce proved a perfect antidote to all\\nmy speculations of giving liberty to a slave or, in\\nother words, a pearl to a swine, a bust, by Canova,\\nto a Goth, an inkstand and a snowy sheet of paper\\nto a monkey, a sharp-edged tool to a baby. Cursing my\\nfolly in having made fourteen individuals comparatively\\nAvretched, I left the office, determined, in my own\\nperson, to shew the world an example of perfect\\nfreedom; and ruminating on the mode to be adopted,\\nI was led into a philosophic reverie on the conquest\\nof passion, the necessity of forbearance. Necessity/", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0255.jp2"}, "256": {"fulltext": "158\\nLIFE IN PHILADELPHIA.\\ncried I, can freedom exist, then, with necessity Can\\nit exist with pride I had proceeded thus far when\\nI was awakened by a ragged Hibernian, who held up\\na blue coat of shreds and patches, to two others of my\\nquondam slaves, when the following dialogue ensued:\\nBlackey, I say cries Paddy, can t you, by the\\npowr s of your stame engine, shift me this coat for a\\nnew one I trust, by the looks of ye, ye r the very\\nman I have been looking for since I left Kilamey.\\nWhat you mean, Sir! I m a merchant. I lain\\nyou better! can t you rid dat dere sign? ply to de\\noffice, to which the lady indignantly added\\nAint it too gusting for a lady of quality to be salted\\nso in street by Russians.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0256.jp2"}, "257": {"fulltext": "LIFE IN PHILADELPHIA.\\n159\\nPride, said I, is the canker- worm which eats up\\nhalf the virtues it is the mill-dew, the dry-rot of the\\nheart it converts the noblest actions into selfishness it is\\na painted sepulchre which encloses all the vices. Pride\\nand Freedom are distant as the poles. This produced a\\ndissertation on the blessings attendant upon humility,\\nwhen I observed a group of old friends in the persons of\\nPlato, Cagsar, and Doll, three of my freed blacks. On my\\napproaching them, Plato, an itinerant vender of boots,\\nwas addressing Caesar and Doll as follows\\nLord a marcy, why Caesar, is dis you; why, wheD\\nyou rive from New York\\nWhen Caesar, who had many times escaped a severe\\nflogging for malversation in the field, by Plato taking the", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0257.jp2"}, "258": {"fulltext": "160 LIFE IN PHILADELPHIA.\\nblame upon himself, replied c You must be mistaking in\\nde person, black man, and Dolly, with all the affec-\\ntation of a town lady of consequence, embracing the\\narm of her sooty lord, added, c What does de imperdent\\nnigger mean, my love\\nPride, said I, is the devil, but ingratitude is the\\nserpent s tooth, used to inflict torture upon an honest\\nheart. Jupiter himself cannot annihilate an atom but,\\nOh Jupiter, enable me to enslave again that rascal\\nCaesar consign him to the lowest pit of human misery\\nDoleful were my thoughts at the poor devil s anguish,\\nwhen the scraping of an old cracked fiddle, to Mars and\\nVenus, two of my free d slaves, gladdened my ear.\\nSays Venus, my dear, is this what you call de Fan-", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0258.jp2"}, "259": {"fulltext": "LIFE IN PHILADELPHIA. 161\\ndang o Yes, replied Mars, yes, my love, only\\nimproved by Monsieur and Madame Yestris. Massa. r\\nexclaimed the scraper of catgut, stretch your leg in\\nstyle down the pint of right foot.\\nThe coach was now ascending Muswell Hill. The\\nthin gentleman paused, the amiable one looked me\\nin the face with an eye, which cheered my heart; it\\nspoke volumes. All this may be true, he observed.\\nand more, but it is not our province to sit in judg-\\nment, nor our duty to prosecute a whole race for the\\nfailings of a thousand nay, were ninety and nine to\\nmisuse the precious gift of liberty, as instruments in\\nthe hand of heaven, we should do the deed of mercy.\\nBacchus yawned at the length of the hill, and by his\\ncountenance evinced that pure enjoyment, like true\\nliberty, could only be had within his bar on Comhill.\\nAX UNCONNECTED TALE.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0259.jp2"}, "260": {"fulltext": "162\\nSALLY WATTS.\\nThe morn was fine in Greenwich Park,\\nWhich park is always green\\nWhen Mr. Rider took a walk,\\nTo see and to he seen.\\nA one-legged Pensioner he saw,\\nSit on a three-legged stool,\\nAnd full of grief he seemed, as tho\\nHis cup of grief was full.\\nNow tallow candles Rider sold,\\nA melting heart he had\\nAnd wished to dip into the cause\\nOf Pensy s state so sad.\\n1 loved a lass, called Sally Watts,\\nSaid he, and fair to pass\\nIn Wapping Wall her father dwelt\\nShe was a wapping lass.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0260.jp2"}, "261": {"fulltext": "A GREENWICH PENSIONER.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0261.jp2"}, "262": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0262.jp2"}, "263": {"fulltext": "SALLY WATTS. lfitt\\nu I thought our mutual flame so hot\\nThat nothing could us part\\nSaid she to me l my only deer,\\n1 I m sure you ve stole my hart.\\nOne day was I most rudely axd\\nAnd pressed to serve the king\\nMy Sally pressed me in her arm?.\\nSaid I, I m taken in.\\nWe all was swept into the hold,\\nNot fit to hold a broom\\nCried I, I cannot stir a peg,\\nYet here I m bound to roam.\\nOur crews went cruising on the sea.\\nAnd with the French fell in\\nWe soon fell out, you may suppose,\\nI wondered who would win.\\nA cannon-ball soon fell d my leg,\\nI prostrate fell, and gory\\nMy footing gone, I lay upon\\nThe deck, bedecked with glory.\\nm2", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0263.jp2"}, "264": {"fulltext": "164 SALLY WATTS.\\nI wrote to tell poor Sally Watts\\nWhat had befallen me\\nFor tho a pensioner be I*\\nNo pen-shunner I be.\\nNow Rider all attention was,\\nWhile Jack his ear bespoke\\nHow for a leg of flesh and blood,\\nHe d got a leg of oak.\\nI sallied out to Sally Watts,\\nWho went off in a huff;\\nMy wooden leg she wou dn t have,\\nSaid she, one s not enough.\\nTom Topsail, with his brace of legs,\\nShall my embraces share\\nYou may with Poll or Doll pair off,\\nSince pared down from a pair.\\nThere s Peggy Popkins, she may like\\nA lover with one leg\\nGet spliced with her, and so you may\\nObtain a second peg.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0264.jp2"}, "265": {"fulltext": "SALLY WATTS.\\nOh cruel Sal poor Jack exclaimed,\\nMy heart you ve nearly broke\\nSays Mr. Rider, let your heart\\nBe like your leg of oak\\nI ll make my will, and leave you straight\\nA thumping legacy\\nLeave Sal to Tom, and shew you have\\nAs good a leg as he.\\n165\\nA MAV OP WAR.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0265.jp2"}, "266": {"fulltext": "166\\nSOME ACCOUNT OF\\nTHE SIDE FAMILY.\\nSublimi feriam sidera. vertice/ Hor.\\nThe Side family are of very high antiquity. Our\\nearliest progenitor was collaterally related to Adam, and\\nhad the honour to be father-in-law to that distinguished\\nindividual. At this day, so extended is our connection,\\nthat one or other of us is always at the prime minister s\\nelbow; and the king himself, God bless him! never\\nstirs without one of us under each arm. For we are\\nupon record as most pertinacious hangers on, ever since\\nthe time of the Phoenician merchants, who colonized\\nus from Tyre and Sidon.\\nThere are good and bad in all families a mingled\\nyarn, as Shakspeare has it. I suppose it was owing to\\nour ancestress Eve s original slip, that in parlour pole-\\nmics the fault is always laid to us it being regularly\\npronounced by both parties to be all on one side. Before", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0266.jp2"}, "267": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0267.jp2"}, "268": {"fulltext": "CRIBBAGK\u00e2\u0080\u0094 ONE FOB HIS NOB.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0268.jp2"}, "269": {"fulltext": "THE SIDE FAMILY. 167\\nthe Conquest, we boasted of royal affinity in the person\\nof Edmund Ironside, whose descendant, Nestor Ironside,\\nappointed himself guardian to all the minors in England.\\nOne of this branch was attached to a certain General\\nBuonaparte, whom he assisted in turning the world up-\\nside down. His immediate posterity, as might have\\nbeen expected from such a parentage, are a couple of\\nnotorious scoundrels, most paternally acquainted with\\nwhipping-posts and prisons Common-Side and Debtors-\\nSide the first of whom is an incorrigible cribbage\\nplayer, while the latter gets into every tradesman s books\\nfrom Piccadilly to Pie-Corner. These slippery person-\\nages will not own kindred with Under-Side, who has\\ngone wonderfully down in the world and in then turn\\nthey are disclaimed by Upper-Side, a snug old fellow,\\nwho would not give sixpence to save the twain of them\\nfrom the gallows.\\nIn-Side and Out-Side are both men of letters; the\\nformer is a universal correspondent, and the latter is\\ndistinguished by his particular address.. They have\\nmade so much money in the travelling line In-Side\\nby publishing his tours, and out-Side by driving the\\nmail that each has got into Parliament; where the\\nmain business has ever since been to turn in-Side out.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0269.jp2"}, "270": {"fulltext": "168 THE SIDE FAMILY.\\nThey met there a brace of cousins, Right-Side, who was\\nreturned for the borough of Suppleton, and Wrong-Side,\\nwho represents the county-town of Oldways. The former,\\nafter voting against a certain question through the last\\ntwenty years, voted for it the other day, and retained his\\noffice the latter stuck to his opinions, and lost\\n[Here the MS. is blotted\\nso as to be quite illegible. Printer s Devil.\\na pair of Londoners among us, respectable\\nfolks enough in their way Bank-Side, who occupies a\\nwhole quay near Blackfriars; and Cheap-Side, who cuts\\ncalicoes somewhere about St. Paul s. The magnates\\nof the family are not over fond of these gentry, though\\neach of them has very lately been Lord Mayor, I assure\\nyou. We are, however, prodigiously proud of Broad-\\nSide and Along-Side; two worthy Admirals, without\\nwhose sendees, we flatter ourselves, Nelson would have\\ndone but small service at Trafalgar. They were equally\\nbusy at Algiers with one Sir Edward, who was created\\nLord Exmouth and at Navarin with the other Sir\\nEdward, who has not been created Lord Anything. The\\nold lads are at present rusticating with their cousin Sea-\\nSide who, by the bye, complains sadly of his retire-\\nment being disturbed every summer by loungers and", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0270.jp2"}, "271": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0271.jp2"}, "272": {"fulltext": "A STOilM n BREAKERS A-HEAD", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0272.jp2"}, "273": {"fulltext": "THE SIDE FAMILY. 169\\nladies. It would be pleasanter, lie says, to be shut up\\nat home with a body s wife, looking out for squalls.\\nThey are, however, still more annoyed by a pair of dull\\nprosers, called Sober-Sides, whom they cannot persuade\\nto relish grog or flip so they occupy themselves with\\npreparing a new edition of their works, which may per-\\nhaps be published ere long under royal patronage. It\\nis odd, however, that they should agree almost as ill with\\ntheir honest kinsman Fire-Side, whose domestic qualities\\nand warm feelings recommend him to every Briton being\\nquite a family man, and never giving his visitors a cold\\nreception. The sailors, to be sure, are out of their\\nelement in his company yet if an enemy were to give\\nthem the slip, and venture upon his territories, how he\\nwould fight pro arts et focis\\nOur vanity is somewhat abated in Counsellor Either-\\nSide, whose practice was double that of any other West\\nminster Blue Bag. He had an ancestor who was exe-\\ncuted in Greece, under the statute of Neutrality, 2d\\nSolon, Chap. 5, section 42. This unlucky gentleman s\\nname was Neither-Side.\\nA-Side was a celebrated actor, whose mode of de-\\nlivery gave occasion to the phrase a playhouse whis-\\nper. Alderman Left-Side was of a peculiarly hearty-", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0273.jp2"}, "274": {"fulltext": "170 THE SIDE FAMILY.\\nconstitution but Governor Right-Side (not the member)\\nwas notorious for a bad liver, thanks to his East India\\nresidence. He died at Cheltenham, under the care of\\nMother Bed-Side a very experienced matron, who had\\nattended the clinical lectures of Surgeon Heavy-Side.\\nHis rupees went to his nephews, Weak-Side and Blind-\\nSide. Then there is honest old Rough-Side, who never\\ntold a lie or said a civil thing in his life whereby you\\nmay safely infer him to be one of our poor relations the\\nopposite in all points of Bobby Smooth-Side, who never\\nuttered a truth beyond the fact of a fine day, or contra-\\ndicted a customer. Bob has sneaked himself into an Alder-\\nman s gown, is a great man at public meetings, and tags\\nM.P. to his name. Dark-Side and Bright-Side are his\\nAvorship s humble imitators, and almost as illustrious at\\nthe small clubs where the first will persuade you that\\nthe empire is about to be blown up by gas and steam,\\nand the second, that beer is going to be a penny a pot.\\nThese gentlemen are almost as eloquent, in their way, as\\nthe illustrious orator who used to travel about Westmore-\\nland, crying Ye men of Ambleside\\nWe have some illegitimate slips among us, who must\\nin all candour be mentioned; Side-Curls, a journeyman\\nhair-dresser at Macalpine s Sides-bone, a taylor s appren-", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0274.jp2"}, "275": {"fulltext": "THE SIDE FAMILY. 171\\ntice who is always to be found in the Poultry Side-scene,\\na call-boy at the Cobourg Side-board, who is butler to\\na Bishop and Side-table, who is his Lordship s chaplain.\\nNeither must Sides-man be forgotten, the deputy church-\\nwarden of St. Omnibus, who has grown fatter than the\\nrector himself, upon vestry feeding. Then there is that\\npuppy, Side-look, cocking his eternal eyeglass, and squint-\\ning like the Saracen s head Side-box and Side-saddle,\\ntoo, a brace of dandies, who fancy the ladies cannot shew\\na nose in the Haymarket without them. As for Side-\\nblow, Side-ways, Side-wind, and Side-long, honest men\\nwill do wisely to keep them at a civil distance. The\\nlast of these worthies, an insinuating rascal affects to\\npass for the son of our straight-forward friend, Along-\\nside but if the old gentleman comes up with him, he ll\\nrectify his crabs-ancles, I warrant you.\\nI wish those people would learn to spell, who assert\\nRegicide, Parricide, and Suicide to be our relations, or\\nthat supple scoundrel, Coincide.\\nAs to my own connexion with the Side family, I need\\ntell neither my name nor quality for the reader must\\nhave long since been satisfied that I am\\nBe-Side myself.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0275.jp2"}, "276": {"fulltext": "172\\nTHE CONTRAST.\\nA varied contrariety,\\nOr contrary variety\\nHow oft we see, of fooleries\\nImported from the Tuilleries.\\nSome Lord, sucli as our boroughs send us,\\nOh from such Lords the Lord defend us\\nThe mark of Cain stamped on his face,\\n(The marks of cane his back would grace,)\\nThe antique antics which he carries\\nBespeak him just arrived from Paris.\\nThough like the monkey, who his tail\\nHad lost, you ll find him with a tale\\nLong as a sailor s long yarn spinning,\\nAnd in the ball-room young hearts winning.\\nHe ll swear, that on his hands and knees,\\nHe scrambled o er the Pyrenees,", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0276.jp2"}, "277": {"fulltext": "THE BALL.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0277.jp2"}, "278": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0278.jp2"}, "279": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0279.jp2"}, "280": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0280.jp2"}, "281": {"fulltext": "THE CONTRAST. 173\\nClimbed Ponipey s pillar sat upon t\\nAnd thrice swam o er the Hellespont\\nPeeped down below, all black and sooty,\\nAt famed Vesuvius like old Booty.\\nNo sense, indeed, or stings of conscience,\\nFall to his lot but lots of nonsense.\\nThen will he vapour (altho fighting\\nHe owns he never took delight in)\\nOf hair-breadth dangers, and hair triggers,\\nAnd at a ball Lord Flashpan figures.\\nBut, for a moment, let us stop\\nTo criticise the humble hop\\nWhere, stead of her Port, Sal drinks Porter.\\nAnd John with malt and hops must court her\\nA dustman in his Sunday clothes,\\nNails in his heels as well as toes,\\nCries, Dang it, Sal I think at ween us\\nYou beat the famous Med cin Wenus\\nCome, take a swig o heavy wet,\\nThen, down the middle, change, and set/\\nTho this is vulgar that refined\\nContrasted like the human mind\\nIf Cham-pagne sparkle at the one.\\nAt t other flashes real fun.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0281.jp2"}, "282": {"fulltext": "174\\nTO THE EDITOR.\\nDeer Sur,\\nAs I here s you re a komical Feller, and lik our\\nGood king, more fonder of Laugh-able than grave sub-\\njects, I begs to send you a Short Tail witch will Unfolde\\nhow It turned Up that I am Sik of sea Woyages You\\nmus now I liks my Familly to get clensed from the over\\npouring Hare of the Burrow, were I lives, so as Land is\\nnot So good as Sea Hares, they gose in the Generality,\\nto gravesend or sum other of the Watery Places. And\\nI assures you they re-turns quite Fresh beans arter the\\nSalt water Bathin.\\nAlltho by the helps of Saint Katterine s Ducks you\\ncan Land on the Water and on Shores, on borde the\\nStemurs, yet I do sn t lik them smoaky hannimals, so we\\ndisembogued ourselvs on borde a Salin Pakkit and we", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0282.jp2"}, "283": {"fulltext": "A LETTER. 175\\nwent salin along lik Flise in a Creme Jugg, for we had\\nthe Currants with us, and my little Dick was in high\\nsprits for he was to see a Peer at Gravesend but he\\nehang d his Notes wen we cum to the Banks of the Terns\\nfor he found the Peer was stoan Well arter we d pade\\nour Fair and bade Fairwell to the bote, we went off\\nin a Crack till we cum to a hankerin on a Green Spot\\nto rest our werid Lims, for we d Bean a Huntin of\\nFroggs. We was just a Praisin the Rurality of a country\\nlif, wen my darter Serefina Turns her Ise over on a\\nHadder on a Ham bush behind the sharp-set edge\\nWe was all most Putrifide at Bean deceaved by this\\nWhily hinsect, so we Tuk to our Heles, and left our\\nstued Eles and sutch of our Et-setteras as wasn t Et,\\nwen wat was our Supprize wen we turned Roundabouts\\nto see sum Wagabones make fre with our Vitals, and\\nbounce out from Behind thare Retrenchment, just as\\nMy darter said, lik the Sodgers but I never new\\nthere was Any sutch thing amongst them\u00e2\u0080\u0094 -Well the\\nlos of our Rum and Brandy put Us out of Spirits it\\nwas a wery Rum los indede, and them Fellers ort to\\nbe Branded, so we settled to get a fresh stok of vitals,\\nbut just as we Turns a Hangle, we sese a Drove of bul-\\nlicks a Makin a Way for us and my darters Feres sends\\nher a scampin Right of to the Left she maks her Stays", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0283.jp2"}, "284": {"fulltext": "176 A LETTER.\\nwery Short with us, and maks Of for a Farmouse she\\nsese in a Behind-part at the Bottom of the field, but\\nas she Reproaches the Gait, a Grate Firey Dog jumps\\nout of his Kernel and seses her in her Caf were as she\\nses the Tend runs is, but I dont Prove her havin Tend runs\\nat all And then sum Vags of farmers Ducks her (I\\nThinks it was Fowl play), for to see if She was Hidera-\\nfoberous, in a Pond This sets her a dis-pond-in and\\nwhen she did Find us she happend to be a Combin her\\nHare, and Dick stood a Ghast lookin lik a\\nCALF.\\nfor he Thort it was a Mermade.\\nWell, deer Sur T thort we had a Rite to suffer no", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0284.jp2"}, "285": {"fulltext": "A LETTER. 177\\nmore Rongs in our way home, so to Varify the Sene I tuk\\na shay we stow d ourselvs in and Dick road in the\\nDickey, but wen we cum to a Blak Heeth, our Hors\\n(a stupit Hass) tuk a Shy at a mild Stoan and Set off we\\nSet on as well as we cud, but one of the Foure wheels tuk\\ntire in the Haxle Trees and we was Throne and Deposed\\nin the Mud.\\nI found they as is derer to Me than Lif all most\\nsnuffocated and so unlik Kristian Beans that I Repents\\nSins given up to Diktats of pleasur witch is all Wanity\\nand Wasting of Spirits.\\nBe leave me Deer Sur Yours til Deth.\\nRobert Dust.\\nP.S. My Darter ses I Lave made to fre use of Kappital Let-\\nters in this Epistol, but I peal to you sur if It isn t a Kappital\\nletter thruout.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0285.jp2"}, "286": {"fulltext": "J 78\\nTHE\\nROYAL EXCHANGE.\\nTired of common-metre,\\n(As of a pair of pumps that cramp the toes,\\nOr spectacles too tight upon the nose,\\nBoth the face and feet are\\n1 hasten to take up a varied measure,\\nFit my extremities to their own pleasure,\\nAnd by th Exchange get wider range.\\nCharles the 10th of France\\nWith his mad pranks no longer king of France is\\nThe friend to ordnance and to ordinances,\\nPlays a game of chance\\nA game, both to himself and subjects foul,\\nSo into purgatory sends his soul\\nLike kitchen range fiery exchange", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0286.jp2"}, "287": {"fulltext": "THE ROYAL EXCHANGE. 179\\nCharles, firebrand of Paris,\\nWith the fall n Prince of darkness, his prime minister,\\n(That sly fox, like old Guy Faux, false and sinister,)\\nA dark lantern carries\\nBrimstone and steel, and tinder-box and matches\\nBut freedom s spirit off the pair dispatches,\\nAnd makes a strange Pcoyal Exchange.\\nTo the 10th Huzzars,\\nKing George of gorgeous niem ry gave a fillip\\nSo the tenth Charles to his troops gave a Phillippe,\\nMidst their proud huzzas\\nThe costume of the English troops was splendid,\\nBut in a glorious revolution ended\\nSo kings derange\u00e2\u0080\u0094 and forms exchange.\\nTis now uniform\\nWith sovereigns, in these eventful times,\\nVariable as their varied climes,\\nTo provoke the storm\\nAnd if the night has closed on Charles for ever,\\nAnother Dey is gone, to come back never\\nPrinces so strange do chop and change\\nn 2", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0287.jp2"}, "288": {"fulltext": "180 THE ROYAL EXCHANGE.\\nBut enough of kings.\\nThe Times the Thames how every thing has changed!\\n(The Tide itself at London Bridge deranged\\nEach the changes rings\\nThat bridge which has upon its timbers stood\\nThe brunt of ages, ages too of flood\\nColossal stride that curbs the tide,\\nSoon thy ancient brow\\nWill change, now stretch d across from shore to shore;\\nAnd thy arch ways will shortly be no more\\nOh, sad tale of woe\\nTake up thy bed and walk, we say in vain\\nWhen thou art gone, thy bed will still remain,\\nAnd, at low water mourn thy departure.\\nLife is as full of loss,\\nAs is an egg of meat walk London round,\\nChances and changes ev ry where abound,\\nFrom Paul s to Charing Cross\\nThe Ball and Cross, of late so elevated,\\nTo Regent s Park* the Bali has transmigrated\\nThe Cross itself laid on the shelf.\\nNow stationed at the Colosseum.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0288.jp2"}, "289": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0289.jp2"}, "290": {"fulltext": "DRAWING FROM THE LIFE.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0290.jp2"}, "291": {"fulltext": "THE ROYAL EXCHANGE. 181\\nFollowing the crosses\\nA-cross the way hath old Fleet market fled,\\nTowards the Colosseum which its head\\nNow so proudly tosses,\\nBeneath the horns of Hornor s sad dilemma\\nNot even Rothschild s giant self could stem a\\nCourse of Exchange of such wide range.\\nNo mean work of art\\nIs there the offspring of a mastermind;\\nDrawn from the life all London is combined\\nThat tremendous wart\\nWhich freely bleeds like wounds of hornithology,\\nHelping to fill the Gardens of Zoology\\nNoblest of piles in Britain s Isles.\\nAnother Cross pursues,\\nLike Paul s, the general road of its departure\\nThe Golden Cross at Charing Cross the quarter\\nWhere the royal mews\\nDid strangers once amuse the upper story\\nA noble National Repository\\nSheiv, not of animal but arts mechanical.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0291.jp2"}, "292": {"fulltext": "182 THE ROYAL EXCHANGE.\\nTo supply the loss,\\nBy force of odd contingency, has strand-ed\\nFrom Ex ter Change, and lately Pell Mell landed\\nThere, a living Cross,\\nWith grand repository natural,\\nNot of the tamer breed of Tattersall,\\nBut beasts of prey like Algiers Dey.\\nO Change of Exeter\\nWhere I, in youth, did thy dear walks parade,\\nDearer to me than Burlington Arcade\\nThou st made thine exit-here\\nChildhood, like manhood, thronged thy stalls below\\nThen to thine upper stalls did gladly go,\\nTo gaze and stare at wolf and bear.\\nUnchanged thy museum,\\nGazette of Literature in verse and prose\\nBy fiiends unwarp d immoveable to foes,\\n(Not so the Lyceum)\\nStaunch pillars are the columns of thy journal,\\nAnd sound unto the very core thy kernel,\\nThe colonel sure of learning s corps.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0292.jp2"}, "293": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0293.jp2"}, "294": {"fulltext": "C-EO LOGICAL RESEARCHES.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0294.jp2"}, "295": {"fulltext": "THE ROYAL EXCHANGE. 183\\nLuminous Lit. Gaz.\\nBright as the gas-lights of these modern days,\\nThy Scripps delights the nation with essays,\\nWho the rare wit has\\nAll subjects to dissect, quite liter-ary,\\nWhile the two Comics with their lighter airy\\nScraps, do essay to please the gay.\\nThus, across the city\\nTo the West-end, have I perambulated\\nAnd crosses, chances, changes, have narrated,\\nBut ere I close my ditty,\\n(While with a wide colossal stride I stand,\\nCompassing each extremity of the Strand,)\\nCan I estrange thee P royal exchange!\\nCentre of the Mundus\\nEmblem of Geological researches\\nOver thy top a gilt Grass-hopper perches,\\nThou nulli secundus\\nWithin thy gates thro ev ry clime we stalk,\\nFrom North to South, Levant and Baltic walk,\\nWhere meet each nation in consultation.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0295.jp2"}, "296": {"fulltext": "184 THE ROYAL EXCHANGE.\\nThy rare pavement too\\nOf Turkey stone Be not surprised at finding\\nOur merchants are become expert at grinding\\nChristian, Turk, and Jew,\\nGrow daily sharper here for otherwise\\nIt could not be. Tho Sol the pavement dries,\\nEach stone thou tread st on thou lt find a whetstone!\\nWhen all London fell\\nBy Fire and Plague s fell pestilential breath,\\nDid st not thou bravely brave that tyrant death,\\nAnd each nat ral ill\\nFlesh in this meat-ropolis is heir to\\nNear unto it s Poultry could st thou care to\\nStarve on Corn-hill mid st plenty still\\nThy brother citizens,\\nFrom earliest time made providence their care,\\nKept a keen eye upon their Bills of fare\\nThus their witty sons,\\nKeep in their streets an eye (like one Jack Horner\\nTo Plum) from Pudding Lane unto Pie Corner\\nIn Cheapside fed on Milk and Bread", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0296.jp2"}, "297": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0297.jp2"}, "298": {"fulltext": "wake! dearest, wake!", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0298.jp2"}, "299": {"fulltext": "THE ROYAL EXCHANGE. 185\\nFrom that sweeping Fire,\\nIn sixteenth century and sixty-six,\\n\u00e2\u0080\u00a2Which scarcely left or feather, stone, or sticks,\\nIn its dread raging ire,\\nThy pinions from the flames like Phoenix rose\\nScarce singed, thy royal tips or royal toes\\nRazed to the ground raised up thou rt found\\nWith thy sweeping wing,\\nWhen near to thy gates the conflagration got,\\nVociferating loud, tis nation hot,\\nTh ashes didst thou fling,\\nLike Vesuvius, far into the distance,\\nResolved to make a furious resistance\\nTo thy hot fry fierce as thy cry\\nThou hast kept thy stand\\nWhile on the right, the Bank has changed her notes.\\nThe Posts upon the left, their scarlet coats,\\n(Generals in command)\\nThe Bank itself unmoved, of all the city firms\\nThe firmest while the Posts, once creeping worms,\\nHave ta en to flight both day and night.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0299.jp2"}, "300": {"fulltext": "186 THE ROYAL EXCHANGE.\\nE en their very mansion,\\nOnce a Lord Mayor s, tis said, in reign of John,\\nMagic like, majestically has flown,\\nWith wide expansion\\nFrom her old hiding place emerging\\nWest she flew, but her eyes northward verging\\nWere met by Smirke s from board of works.\\nIn grand schemes no novice,\\nOn the broad wings of government he flew,\\nAnd from his own pinions swiftly drew\\nA new plan of office,\\nFor Posts, both general, twopenny, and foreign\\nA spacious place for quick and dead to stir in,\\nAnd made his stand in Place le Grand,\\nThus, in all but thee,\\nHow Majesty has changed from east to west,\\nThyself, though mentioned last, art not the least\\nType of royalty\\nThy royal name or nature has not faltered,\\nAlthough the face of every thing is altered\\nWithin thy range for thou rt Ex change", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0300.jp2"}, "301": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0301.jp2"}, "302": {"fulltext": "A FAIR DAY.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0302.jp2"}, "303": {"fulltext": "187\\nBARTHOLOMEW FAIR.\\nBefore entering on so prolific a subject, and especially\\non so wide field, 1 was advised to call first at St. Bar-\\ntholomew s, where I should find subjects more than I\\ncould dissect and lay open to my readers but although\\ninformed I should be hospitably received, I considered\\nthat my walk did not lie in the above Hospital, since\\nthe subjects there partook rather too much of the grave\\nfor my purpose so I determined not to take that round,\\nbut keep to my own family circle, preferring their homely\\nfare to that in Smithfield, and amuse them with some\\naccount of what is usually called Bartlemy Fair, if I\\nmay use its more corrupt name,\\nBartlemy Tair, then, is a general feast; yet sober folks\\nconsider that it approaches too fast. The fair days, nine\\nout of ten, belie themselves for the unlucky visitors too\\noften find St. Swithin dropping in upon St. Bar-\\ntholomew. At this fair, trick and deception make then", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0303.jp2"}, "304": {"fulltext": "188 BARTHOLOMEW FAIR.\\nstand, and though lies are told by the bushel, yet they\\ntell well, and the lying culprits stand the better in public\\nopinion. The Holiday folks even ascend platforms with\\nhangings thereon, and too often end their day with a\\ndrop too much. They walk under Booths without fear\\nof gins and traps and men and women resume the\\nrattles of then childhood. This noted Festival falls on\\na Holy (or Saint s)-day, and therefore is a general holi-\\nday for sinners. In the shape of a flood it is productive\\nof baneful effects, for all people flow towards it in one\\ntide. The best and the worst watches go equally fast,\\nespecially if they have not guards all watchmen being\\nsent over the water to Charlie. Free livers are as-\\ntounded by the rising of the lights, and the illiterati, as-\\ntonished at the illuminations, go away much enlightened.\\nTo conclude, I should observe, that hundreds of asses\\nof all sexes, out of Essex, Middlesex, and Sussex, come\\nfar and near, on foot and on horseback, to see the vota-\\nries of the Saint eat fire and vomit ribands. This may\\nserve to illustrate a well-known sign of the times, as\\nbeing u good entertainment for man and horse, but,\\nfor myself, reversing the order of things, I pronounce\\nthe Fair (not, I hope, ungallantly) a general nuisance,\\nand n this new sense of the word, I indite it.", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0304.jp2"}, "305": {"fulltext": "189\\nTHE\\nTRIAL OF SIR JOHN FALSTAFF,\\n(before chief justice johntson,)\\nFOR CLIPPING THE KING S ENGLISH.\\nThe Court was met, and mighty Sam Chief Justice there was chosen,\\nAnd a Jury was empanelled, making up the even dozen\\nReviewers all, or Editors of Journals periodical 5\\nWhen from the dock the Doctor did Jack FalstafFs jolly body call.\\nOh yes, oh yes, the Crier cried, whereas you were committed,\\nPrimo Henrici Quinti, to the Fleet for a lean witted\\nIncorrigible hasher up of jokes which never fail you j\\nAnd since you ve in Old Bailey lain, with not a friend to bail you\\nThe law at length lays with eclat her crooked claw your sconce on;\\nAnd to-day you will be tried before the Lord Chief Justice Johnson.\\nC. J. Silence in Court the trial must proceed with due decorum.\\nCrier. Stand up, Sir John\\nSir J. Be still, thou knave, I m fmishing my jorum\\nI m a Justice of the Peace myself\u00e2\u0080\u0094\\nC. J. I think thou art a quorum.\\nGentlemen of the Jury, we must use deliberation\\nThis is no single case, you see, but of a Corporation.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0305.jp2"}, "306": {"fulltext": "190 SIR JOHN FALSTAFF s TRIAL.\\nRead the indictment, clerk but you had better read it short I\\nConceive the trial may be long.\\nClerk {reads.) Primo Gulielmi Quarti,\\nThe Jurors for our Lord the King present this monstrous criminal,\\nJohn Falstaff, who, whate er he says, still mixes fun and whim in all\\nWith quip and crank, and clench and pun, and quibble and conundrum,\\nKnocks pronouns, nouns, and verbs about, and trips their legs from under\\nRuns interjections out of breath, puts adverbs in a flurry, em;\\nParts participles all apart, conjunctions hurry skurry,\\nTo the prejudice of Dilworth, Dyke, Home Tooke, and Lindley Murray\\nWhile on the words so out of joint affixing folly s signet, he\\nHath spoiled the English of the King, and wronged his crown and dignity.\\nHow say you, culprit, guilty or not guilty\\nSir J. Stay, thou varlet\\nI ve a word or two to say to that old gentleman in scarlet.\\nMaster Doctor, you re a partial judge, I ll prove by your biography,\\nAnd Bozzy is my witness, you re so lost in lexicography\\nYou hate a quibble worse than does a quaker, and you d run\\nWith forty times less speed from a pistol than a pun.\\nI object to you in toto.\\nC. J. We must kick out that objection.\\nSir J. A pun a pun What punishment can come by your direction,\\nWho commit the very acts for which the law provides correction\\nC. J. Sir John, Sir John, obtemperate, and give your heed auricular\\nThen, as you please, deny or own the charge in each particular.\\nWhat counsel have you\\nSir J. Mr. Hood.\u00e2\u0080\u0094\\nC. J. Why, Sir, I am but ill able\\nTo a contest with that gentleman in letter, word, or syllable.\\nTis not the hood that makes the friar \u00e2\u0080\u0094but here the proverb should\\nTurn retrograde, and say Twas not the friar made the hood.\\nCrier. A letter for Sir John, my lord\\nSir J. {opens and reads.) Tis very hard, ecod it is\\nHere s Mr. Hood is taken up with his own Whims and Oddities\\nTroth, though no friar was his sire, yet no one-can deny,", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0306.jp2"}, "307": {"fulltext": "SIR JOHN FALSTAFF S TRIAL. 191\\nThat when he Tilted against Chance, the Chance of Tilt to try,\\nMost surely he a fryer must be, with such odd fish to fry.\\nC. J. Gentlemen of the Jury, twere a monstrous incongruity,\\nTo occupy the court with such a needless superfluity\\nOf argument or evidence, when the prisoner s own oration\\nHas decisively pronounced his spontaneous condemnation\\nBy the statute against clipping, which may well apply the lash\\nTo defilers of our language as to filers of our cash.\\nAnd so frequent the oc- currency\\nSir J. A pun, I do protest\\nC. J. Sir, no one but the Judges are in court allowed to jest.\\nSir J. That is to jest aloud but it shews too mu ch rigidity,\\nTo quarrel with the whisper of a quibble or a quiddity.\\nC. J. Gentlemen, you see with what astonishing rapidity\\nHe multiplies the proofs beyond a chance of contradiction.\\nCan you vacillate much longer on a verdict of conviction\\nAll the Jury. We all pronounce hirn guilty of snipping and of\\nThe English of our Lord the King [clipping\\nC. J. And that deserves a whipping.\\nHold up your hand, Sir John, and say if you have aught to say,\\nWhy justice in a case like this should not hold on her way.\\nSir J. I ll tell you why tis you, not I, who a strange language\\nAnd mar our honest native phrase with Latin and with Greek 5 [speak,\\nShewing upon the simplest things a tongue sesquipedalian,\\n(Which means a tongue of six feet long) and older than Deucalion\\nCome, Doctor, lend me twenty pounds, and I ll hold you two to one,\\nThat in all your works you do not shew the shadow of a pun\\nWhile every time I ope my mouth, I shew my real merit as\\nA real Saxon son of sack, to prove in vi?io Veritas.\\nLike lively Hood my livelihood I like to get by talking-;\\nAnd if read like Red Riding Hood, I ll ride instead of walking.\\nC. J. Upon my verity, Sir John, you make me use severity,\\nFor, old or young, was never tongue that went with such celerity\\nTwere a famous bore, at the Boar s Head, to listen to your fine tales\\nGaoler, be quick, and bring me here the last new cat o nine tails.", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0307.jp2"}, "308": {"fulltext": "192 sir john falstaff s trial.\\nGaoler. Cato the censor stole my cat.\\nForeman. Make haste, and bring a newer.\\nC. J. Oh, Cato steal a cat o nine Twas just like a reviewer.\\nThink not for that to scape the cat, by such an idle hum,\\nYour back, old Jack, shall surely taste the flagelliferum.\\nGo, gaoler, to the Muses nine, and bring them without fail,\\nBut see it done, that every one does with her bring her tail.\\nSir J. The Muses tale-bearers will they be angry at my fun,\\nOr let their tails be used for tawse, and dipped in Helicon\\nC. J. Be silent, prisoner, or 1 must enforce your taciturnity,\\nYou d out-talk women nine times nine, though talking to eternity.\\nCome, ladies, pass us from Parnassus your lash upon this stale piece,\\nAnd make the back of old Sir Jack taste smartly of your\\nTAIL PIECE.\\nBR.ADBURY AND EVANS, PRINTERS.\\n5 s n", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0308.jp2"}, "309": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0309.jp2"}, "310": {"fulltext": ".4 2fc\\nDeacidified using the Bookkeeper process.\\nc o Neutralizing agent: Magnesium Oxide\\n-^J Treatment Date: Dec. 2007\\nPreservationTechnologies\\nA WORLD LEADER IN COLLECTIONS PRESERVATION\\n1 1 1 Thomson Park Drive\\nCranberry Township. PA 16066\\n(724)779-2111", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0310.jp2"}, "311": {"fulltext": "-4\u00c2\u00b0*\\na9\\nt ^00\u00c2\u00a3Mh\u00c2\u00b1+ v.\\nC .\u00e2\u0099\u00a6Wfc^_ ~o .4* ^Swl*- 0\\ny. ^o efr* .vWa;.\\n4\u00c2\u00b0^\\np\\nvv\\nC if*\\nft\\nV s s G\\nc if*", "height": "4024", "width": "2344", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0311.jp2"}, "312": {"fulltext": "", "height": "4201", "width": "2417", "jp2-path": "newcomicannualfo00hood_0312.jp2"}}